Idk

Idk what this is about

[poemswords]

“The next suitable person you’re in light conversation with, you stop suddenly in the middle of the conversation and look at the person closely and say, “What’s wrong?” You say it in a concerned way. He’ll say, “What do you mean?” You say, “Something’s wrong. I can tell. What is it?” And he’ll look stunned and say, “How did you know?” He doesn’t realize something’s always wrong, with everybody. Often more than one thing. He doesn’t know everybody’s always going around all the time with something wrong and believing they’re exerting great willpower and control to keep other people, for whom they think nothing’s ever wrong, from seeing it.”

— David Foster Wallace, The Pale King (via philosophyquotes)

[f-e-celler]

[uhmwhateverr]

Is this even real!

[uhmwhateverr]

The rain was never my lover, but a friend.

I wasn't the one who sought to dance in the rain. I never shut my eyes to feel the fall brush my skin. Perhaps the impression of companionship it reflected was stronger than what the romantic movies and novels were telling me to do. Perhaps it echoed the secrets I wasn't ready to share or accept. Perhaps it was everything at once but nothing at the same time.

Standing alone in the dead of night could scare you. But it feels like home to my heart. And in case the drops come out of my eyes, I let them stroll with the downpour. Though the malady in my heart may never leave, when it rains somehow a sapling rises from the wasteland.

And with that,

My isolation is curbed.

And the vacancy is filled.

And I feel less lonely.

It's like a drug you never knew you needed. Somehow propelling you to feel a little less heavy.

The rain was never my lover but a friend.

The rain led me to the truth but taught me to lie.

[uhmwhateverr]

My first love

When my first love came, he named me after his revered flower, daisy.

Hold tight, he always said. For I was the gemstone, in his grassland full of ivy.

But he unbound the grip, in the arrival of the storm; and he watched me get plucked by the hands of spring.

So now,

With every fall , each petal of mine becomes the fallout of a catastrophe.

And with every hard frost, there thrives a fresh bud. But in my place, there grow, only tulips

---------------------

(Tulips are used in funerals)

[f-e-celler]

August sounds like a hard fall.

Autumn calls to me in longing, I find her a cold comfort.

Shes something I continuously lose yet she always returns, then, in the blink of an eye she is gone.

I dont mind, she will forever be kind to me.

“Remind you of someone?” A voice says, and it comes flooding back, a wave of splintered shards of ice that rip through me.

Bearing resemblance to a uncontrollable rushing river, the one I always fall into and get stuck in place in.

It happens more often, now.

Not over you, though. (Dont flatter yourself.)

My love for you has left me, at least in this season.

I am hardened, like the sharp, bare branches, yet I fear its return with every bone in my body.

[mitchiet]

[click for better quality]

[uhmwhateverr]

I'm not crying..😭😭😭

[uhmwhateverr]

Here, let me rest..

For its been ages,

Since my skin collapsed,

And clung to your warmth.

But my heart still whispers,

The stories of you and I,

Reminiscing the grey songs,

That your heartbeat sang

To mine.

[petalya]

in therapy my therapist and i were talking about my own feelings of self worth in relationships. and she asked me to say qualities about myself that someone else would be attracted to, on a romantic and platonic level. so i named some things like compassionate, empathetic, etc. and she said “you named things that you can give someone. ways you can serve, rather than ways that you are” and y'all..my mind was blown that’s gonna stick with me forever like she then proceed to tell me actual innate qualities about myself that she liked and thought anyone else would like as well and i hadn’t even considered those because like she said i was focused on things i could do outwardly to attract and maintain connections rather than who i was as a person..goddamn!!! thats tea!!!

[petalya]

With this in mind, this also makes me think of the ways people describe us. When people say the reasons that they love/like you or describe you as a person, are they only naming ways that you serve them? Are they equating your worth with how much you do for them?

ex. “You’re such a good listener. You’re so generous, you’re so compassionate. You’re always there for me. You always hold me down. You’re reliable”

vs.

“You’re so funny! You’re very vibrant. You’re creative, passionate, and intelligent. You’re optimistic. You’re so talented at ____” , etc. I think that’s very telling.

[hauntified-deactivated20210730]

This FUCKED relationships up too because once this hit me, I realized people can just be in love with the way you make them feel instead of who you actually are. ALWAYS pay attention to the last little “vs” but there because it IS super telling

[uhmwhateverr]

Sometimes this world offers me to be lost and still breathe. Go places and forget where I came from. Look at the sky and watch the moon and sun proclaiming their love of a lifetime.

I love coffee but I’m having a mango smoothie at the moment. I like to read poetry but I’m also a fan of marvel comics. I hate numbers but I’m studying maths, physics and chemistry. Maybe I’ll teach. Maybe I’ll be a lawyer. Maybe I’ll end up doing something entirely different. I don’t know.

What I do know is this: it pisses me off that society pushes us to pick a role, slap it on like a mask, and stick with it for life. It’s like they want you to stay in one lane forever, and I can’t stand it.

I’ve got no love for society, but I like my life, even with all its twisted turns. I’ve made peace with what I can’t fix, who I’ll never be, and the stuff I’ll never outrun. Part of me will always wear a mask, and that’s just how it is—I’ve got to survive. But beneath all the layers of bullshit, my life can still be something good, if I decide to make it that way.

So perhaps this world is not as twisted as we think it is; only if you’re not living in a false reality. The real problem is we’ve got it all wrong, misunderstood, like trying to read a novel upside down. But maybe, just maybe, there’s a sliver of a shot to rewrite some of it. The rest? Hell, it’s always going to be what it is. What we can do is carve out our own little spot, take what we can, deal with what we can’t. Love without strings attached. And after that? Just exist. Be whoever the hell we think we are.

[uhmwhateverr]

I kept my head down, lying low on this dirt full of liars. Watched myself, bit by bit, turning to ash. The ground was frozen, the wind cut like a knife. But somewhere deep inside, something kept whispering, "Hold on, we’ll rise again." And all I could do was wonder if that was truth or just another distraction. I lived in a world built on lies, and here I was, cradling its death in my hands.

[uhmwhateverr]

I love the kind of people who can look past our fake smile because they know what goes on in our head when we say ” I’m okay”.

Because they carry the same pain that we do. They fight the same battles that we do. And they’ve the same scar as us.

So love them, whenever they share their scars. For it is to remind us, that we aren't the only one who's falling apart.

Whoever here is in pain, I love you. I know it's not easy but let's not be terrified of our ghosts anymore.

Let's share. 🖤

[uhmwhateverr]

Rain

It’s raining here..

And I can’t help but wonder,

Why..at times,

I loves it so endlessly

Unlike others.

Is it because,

Of the storm it inflicts

On my barren skin?

To ease the scarred,

To calm the mourning heart?

Or is it because,

It lends fresh tears

To the weary eyes;

And sits with us in the dark

To withstand the night?

Perhaps I would never know,

But I love the rain.

For it looks past my “I’m fine”

And make me feel..

Like I’m not the only ones,

In this fight.

[weavemama]

maybe gangster whales is what we need in order to fight climate change

[moro-nokimi]

Whales, you’re doing great sweeties

[uhmwhateverr]

[dailythorgifs]

Steve + Thor ✘ Battlefield talk

[southernbell91]

They Really do have the most underrated Friendship in the MCU @lancetuckersmustache

[marvelgirl7]

Funny my best friend is Thor and she deems me Steve so she sent me this after Endgame

[uhmwhateverr]

I can’t with this 😂😂😂😂

[uhmwhateverr]

Its weird how we’ve undermined ourselves. That when something good happens, the first thing we do is whisper under our breath

“ is this real? Do I deserve this? uhm no, probably not”

I just want to believe that I deserve good things; that maybe, I can have nice things in life too. Be it a good cup of coffee I want to feel like “yeah it's been a long day I deserve this fucking coffee”

Idk is that too much to ask for?

[uhmwhateverr]

I wasn't a morning person, but there I was at the break of the day. Waiting for the sunrise, only to watch him stay. How in love he was with the golden shine that poured over his skin. And I swear I felt like I lived an eternity, the moment I touched him.

Excerpt of my unfinished poetry

[poemswords]

“Some people are born with tornadoes in their lives, but constellations in their eyes. Other people are born with stars at their feet, but their souls are lost at sea.”

— Nikita Gill, Perspectives (via books-n-quotes)