Mike Driver
Not today Justin

Product Placement
Today's Document
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Cosimo Galluzzi
RMH

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Show & Tell

Andulka
DEAR READER
Cosmic Funnies
Claire Keane
we're not kids anymore.
Game of Thrones Daily
taylor price
YOU ARE THE REASON
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

Discoholic 🪩
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

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@umbilic-torus
Welcome to Tumblr, Twitter users!
Don’t worry, we don’t have Elon Musk here…
But hipsters beware, you’re in for a scare!
*GOOSEBUMPS THEME INTENSIFIES*
This isn’t Twitter. This isn’t your average every day site. This is Tumblr. We’re crazy. We’re weird. We don’t fit in. We’re the fangirls, the fujoshis, the Superwholockers, and the Steven Universe Critical bloggers. We forgot what “normal” was. So if you’re expecting a normal website…
thanks for watching! if you liked this video, be sure to click the like button. if you want to be notified next time I upload, click subscribe and the bell. if you have something you want to say about the video, scroll down and click the comment box, type what you want to say, then post the comment. while you're down there, if you see another comment you like, click the like button on that comment too. if you have a playlist of similar videos to this one and you want to add this video to that playlist, click the playlist button, and select the playlist. if you want to stop watching this video, smash that pause button, or click one of the videos either on the sidebar or below, depending on your platform. if you don't want to watch any of those videos, you can return to the home page, or type the name of a specific other video you want to watch in the search bar and press enter. if the volume of this video isn't what you want, you c
Cowboys are witches and horses are their familiars
guns are their wands and they only know one spell (bullet)
Rootin’, tootin’, toil n’ shootin’
Fire burn and cowboy bootin’
Eye of newt and spicy beans,
Toe of frog and denim jeans,
Whiskey, grits, n’ demon spittle
tossed into my iron griddle
With the tannin’ of our hides,
Somethin’ wicked this way rides
I just made a phone call and I'm honestly being so brave about it.
Umbilic Torus my beloved
i’m convinced that the ice age franchise won’t end until the squirrel that always chases after the nut gets an equally hideous girlfriend with Squirrel Tits™ and eyelashes
no….. No
NO
No you don’t understand, I have this entire developed theory about the Ice Age universe which has been cooking up in my mind and has only be reinforced by the latest 5th installment. Scrat is the god of the Ice age universe. The story began with him and the story will end with him. If there weren’t hints before, in this latest installment, it becomes clear that Scrat’s actions dictate what happens on Earth and to the protagonists. Yes, maybe Scart’s only goal is to get the nut, but his actions SHAPE what happens in the film. If we needed any further proof then may I point out something Buck said in the 5th film along the lines of “we’re 6 mins early! Somebody up there likes us!” That phrase is usually used to refer to a god and in this case it’s used to refer (unknowingly) to scrat!
However, there is an ALTERNATE theory that I have been working on. What if Scart isn’t the god of the ice age universe, but rather, the NUT is? As i have already said, Scart’s actions shape the course of the story but what motivates Scart? That’s right: the nut, it is truly because of the nut that Scart does what he does that leads to the events that take place in the story. This would create an interesting metaphor here. Scrat is chasing the nut like man chases divinity. So when will the Ice Age saga end?? When Scart finally gets the nut for good. When man catches God.
i didnt even read this but im laughing at how many times scrat is typoed as scart
“what motivates Scart? That’s right: the nut” is the funniest fucking string of words I’ve read in my life
hey so?
ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
[ID: A skateboard whose wheels have been replaced by tiny skateboards. End ID]
16 wheeler.
fuck people who reblog posts which contradict each other. no! be explicitly clear
admire folks who reblog posts which contradict eachother. exactly! keep em guessing
Source: [x]
Click HERE for more facts!
you LAUNCH felicette??
hOW many French scientists?
Holy SHIT he did good!!
*immediately messages all my coworkers*
Hey, it’s Hershey. We already got our first exciting fan letter! Let’s see what it says
It’s from Forrest. Hi, Forrest! You suggested that we should delete our account on July 17th, 2021.
Well Forrest, I have a suggestion for you. On July 17th, 2021, I suggest you start running.
I love being an artist
jesus christ this is beautiful I literally can’t believe you could put so much into this really well crafted art and only get 600 notes I hope to god that you posted this in the last few minutes
Douglas Adams is the best when it comes to describe characters
they need to teach classes on Douglas Adams analogies okay
“He leant tensely against the corridor wall and frowned like a man trying to unbend a corkscrew by telekinesis.”
“Stones, then rocks, then boulders which pranced past him like clumsy puppies, only much, much bigger, much, much harder and heavier, and almost infinitely more likely to kill you if they fell on you.”
“He gazed keenly into the distance and looked as if he would quite like the wind to blow his hair back dramatically at that point, but the wind was busy fooling around with some leaves a little way off.”
“It looked only partly like a spaceship with guidance fins, rocket engines and escape hatches and so on, and a great deal like a small upended Italian bistro.”
“If it was an emotion, it was a totally emotionless one. It was hatred, implacable hatred. It was cold, not like ice is cold, but like a wall is cold. It was impersonal, not as a randomly flung fist in a crowd is impersonal, but like a computer-issued parking summons is impersonal. And it was deadly - again, not like a bullet or a knife is deadly, but like a brick wall across a motorway is deadly.”
And, of course: “The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t.”
the one that will always stay with me is “Arthur Dent was grappling with his consciousness the way one grapples with a lost bar of soap in the bath,” i feel like that was the first time i really understood what you could do with words.
I will reblog this every time I see it because these are some of my favorite sentences in the English language.