he promised me a chance
but it felt like he never really meant it
we went out, tried to feel normal
nigiri for lunch, bowling after
small moments that were supposed to bring us closer
but they only reminded me how far apart we already were
he agreed with everything I said
but not in care or love
just in absence
as if nothing I said truly mattered
as if he was waiting for it all to end
waiting to go home, to drink a beer, to leave
I looked into his eyes
searching for love, warmth, the person I knew
the goofy, playful one
the one who kissed me
the one who held me like I mattered
but I couldn’t see him there anymore
only a tired, sad, empty person
someone who doesn’t feel me anymore
he said he’s trying
but I only see sadness
and detachment
like his feelings already left long before he did
I panicked
my chest tight, my head spinning
my body trembling, vertigo taking over
I couldn’t even enjoy the bowling
he played alone
and I hated myself
hated my weakness
hated how helpless I felt
this was the first day of our last days
and it was failing
over and over
but I kept trying anyway
praying silently
hoping for something small
a hug
a smile
a word to remind me he still cared
and there was a moment
just one moment
when he smiled at the nigiri
because he loves it so much
but said he preferred something else
and I felt like I failed again
but that little smile
so fleeting
was mine to enjoy
and I held onto it
like a tiny spark in a storm
because it was the only good thing
in a day full of heartbreak
the truth is
I still love him
but I can’t see any love for me anymore
his eyes tell me
“I’m done, I’m tired, I don’t want this”
and still
I hope
that one day
he’ll pull me close
and say he loves me
more than anything
like I still imagine
like I still dream
but today
he’s gone
even if he’s here
dailybridgerton
ellievsbear
kianamaiart
vaporwave
prguitarman
