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I Am Me

Pairing: Yeonjun x Reader

Word Count: 15.6k

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Summary: Yeonjun wants to be more than his titles, some that doesn’t even belong to him. He just wants to be himself, but when the media doesn’t let him, it takes a toll on him.

Warnings: Some **spoiler**, but I just want to say that I’m not trying to antagonize BTS or fans from either bands in this story. It’s a highly dramatized, fictional story, and I’m sorry if it offends you in any way!

You’ll never forget that day, walking down the halls at three in the morning. You didn’t want to be there because you just spent the entire day working. ‘Appreciate that you have a secure job at that entertainment agency’ is what your friends and family would tell you after landing a great opportunity to work at one of the most famous music companies. You hated working here because of the pressure of working for nearly the entire day managing five trainees. There’s so much workload that you even contemplated on quitting.

But peeking through the door that’s slightly ajar of a dance room, it changed your entire perspective. It gave you another reason to keep going forward with these trainees. Sitting alone in the hollow practice room is Yeonjun, curled up in a ball. His shirt is drenched in sweat, or at least that’s what you thought. Although it is sweat, it took you a moment to realize that some of the wet spots on his shirt are also tears. This young man, who dreams of becoming a star, is sitting by himself in a defeated pose like he’s going to give in to the overwhelming stress. No one is there to comfort him, left to be ridiculed by his dark thoughts. Only at the ripe age of eighteen, he already thinks that he’s incompetent.

“I can’t do this anymore…” He muttered under his breath.

==========

“Jokbal! Jokbal! Jokbal!” Yeonjun chants, fist-pumping the air.

You and Yeonjun are at the grocery store, looking through the meat section. While you’re looking for pig trotters, he’s singing a tune he made up in his head with the only lyrics to his song is jokbal. He’s wearing a face mask and baseball hat to hide his identity, but those aren’t enough to hide the excitement in his eyes.

“Get the spicy kind!”

“Alright, alright.”

“Let’s also get chicken feet! Pizza! Pasta!”

You chuckle. “You sound like a child.”

“What’s there not to be excited about? You said that we can be spoiled brats tonight, so I wanna eat whatever I want.”

“Yea, but don’t you think it’s going to be too much for you guys to eat?”

“Eh, it’s fine,” he waves his hand nonchalantly. “It’s coming from the company’s credit card, right? That means we’re finally allowed to eat anything with no limits. Besides, we don’t have a recording tomorrow, so we don’t gotta worry about looking puffy.”

You don’t think you’ll ever understand how Yeonjun’s brain is wired. Still, it’s great seeing him smile this much. In the midst of their busy schedule, they have the entire day off. And the day before, it ended perfectly with their first win for Crown. They’ve never been this exuberant before.

“Also, let’s get some bubble tea. Kai and Soobin might want some ice cream too. Beomgyu wants kimbap and Taehyun wants some toast. Let’s go, let’s go!”

“Give me a sec. I still have to get some jokbal, then restock kimchi for you guys. Also, you guys need some more tangerine—”

“No more tangerines! We eat that enough already. Bubble tea!!!” He’s like a child about to receive a lollipop.

Despite being the eldest, he’s got a cute side to him that you find lovable. “Alright, where do you wanna get your drink?”

“Let’s go to 7 Leafs! I heard a new one opened down the street.”

“Okay, after we shop. Text the other boys what they want.”

“Yessir.”

“Excuse me?”

“Yes, Ma’am.” He puckers his lips, swaying his head side-to-side playfully.

You hurriedly look through the shopping list on your phone. The boys must be starving back at the dorms, so you want to hurry and get back as soon as possible. You can already imagine Beomgyu clinging onto one of the members and whining about how hungry he is.

While Yeonjun’s distracted with his phones, two women are whispering and pointing at him, occasionally giggling like school girls. Even with his disguise, he’s still spotted. Though, what did you expect? With their explosive debut, they’re bound to be instantly recognized in the public.

“…Go…” One girl mutters.

“No, you go first.”

They nudge each other, pushing one over the other to see who gets to Yeonjun first. He’s still oblivious to the fans, finishing his text message and sending it to the group chat. During times like these, you would push Yeonjun away from these girls to avoid drawing more attention, but since they aren’t hinting at any sort of danger, you decide to let it be.

After some minor arguments, one of the girls approaches him, although she keeps her eyes locked to the ground. “Uhm…excuse me?”

Her voice catches Yeonjun’s attention, so he turns to her, startling her. “Hello?”

“Are you…Yeonjun from Tomorrow by Together?”

He nods, and she squeals.

“I-I’m sorry if I’m bothering you!!”

Her eyes are fixated on Yeonjun. Even though you’re right next to him, she behaves like you don’t exist.

“No, it’s really fine. Did you want to take a picture? Manager, we can take a picture, right?”

You shrug your shoulders. “Go ahead.”

“O-oh, I wasn’t intending on taking a picture. I was just wondering...” she rummages through her purse.

Yeonjun’s eyes lighten up at the thought that this lady is going to give him a gift. He even got his hand out and ready to accept the present. Eventually, she finds what she wanted to give, and it’s a small box of chocolate the size of his hand.

“I was wondering if you can give these to Taehyung-oppa!” She covers her mouth.

And that gleam of happiness is immediately diminished, like a gust of wind blown against a lit candle. You don’t need to see under his mask to know that he lost the will to smile. It’s like his confidence has been stomped on, glaring down at the gift that isn’t even his. It’s not even for another member from his group—it’s for their senior.

“M-my friend and I have been fans of BTS since we were nineteen, so can you let him know that we’re thankful for everything he’s done? He really saved me from the darkest time in my life.”

He’s at a loss of words, baffled at this outrageous request. But rather than going off on the woman, Yeonjun laughs stiffly, scratching the back of his head. “I’m sorry I don’t know if I can give it to him because we don’t see each other much.”

Her shy nature disappears, cocking her head to the side and raising an eyebrow. “Huh? But you’re the same company. How do you guys not see each other often? I thought you guys are already like family to them.”

“It’s…much more complicated than that. Our schedules never correlate, so that’s why. If it makes you feel better, we can take a picture and—”

“Then…it’s okay. Sorry to bother you guys. You can have the chocolate though.” She waves goodbye and returns to her friend.

You should’ve stepped in when you had the chance. Yeonjun is at a loss of words as he watches the two girls trek off as if this never happened. Even though they’re walking off, he can hear fragments of their conversation.

“He kind of looks like Taehyungie-oppa…do you think he…passed auditions…becau…looks?” One whispers.

“Maybe. But…chin…too big. Teeth too.”

If you two weren’t in public, then you would’ve smacked them without hesitation. To bother Yeonjun during his day off only to push him aside because he’s not the idol they’re looking for, it’s just outright rude. This clearly ruined his mood, and now he’s become sullen. He rubs his chin, thinking about the last girl’s comment.

“Ignore them. Let’s go back and celebrate, yea?”

He nods, but his smile hasn’t returned.

==========

“Here you guys go!” You set a plate of jokbal on the floor.

In the living room of their crowded dorm, the five of them crowd around the meal that you’ve prepared for them. Despite the many clothes that are sprawled across the floor and trash left out on the coffee table, you’re able to brush them aside to make room for the six of you to sit together. Other than the pigs’ feet, there’s also pizza and chicken feet. Beomgyu’s mouth waters, but before he even eats, he briefly takes pictures of it with his phone.

“You didn’t have to waste your time making this when you could’ve just ordered it.” Taehyun states with a monotone expression.

“I know, but in honor of your first win, I wanted to cook from scratch.”

“You made the pigs’ feet, but you ended up ordering pizza and chicken feet…” Taehyun flicks open a can of Coke.

“Okay, pizza is hard to make from scratch, and chicken feet…the nails…” Shivers run down your spine.

“Taehyun…you could at least say thank you,” Soobin elbows him.

Now flustered, Taehyun looks down. “…Sorry…thank you.”

“No, no! It’s okay. For all we know, my cooking is probably not that great.”

“Anything from the Manager is going to be super great! Thank you very much!!” Huening Kai leans over and rubs your stomach.

“Hurry, hurry! Let’s eat.” Beomgyu takes a plate full of chicken feet.

“Says the one who kept taking pictures.” Soobin mumbles.

Each member takes a plate of food. Even though you know full well how average your cooking is, the boys are starving, so they’ll take anything. Everyone digs in to their dinner, all except for Yeonjun. As you’re eating the pizza, stretching the cheese from your mouth, you stare at him, waiting for him to take a bite.

“Yeonjun? Are you gonna eat?” You ask while covering your mouth full of food.

He shakes his head, rubbing his chin. “No…I’m not hungry.”

“What? But you were so excited to eat.”

“I’m full from the bubble tea.”

He gets up and walks to their bedroom, which is extremely out of the ordinary. He never says no to food. Even when they’re dieting, he’s the one who would sneak in food. Now that they have a chance to eat whatever they like, he’s not eating.

“Did something happen to Hyung?” Soobin asks curiously.

“Some girls were being rude.”

You didn’t expect it to take a toll on him this much. What they did has definitely squash his confidence, but knowing him, there has to be more than what those girls said.

==========

Yeonjun is sitting on his bunk bed, laying on his stomach and watching a video on his phone. He hears a knock at the door.

“Yeonjun? Can I come in?” You ask from the other side of the door.

He pauses the video. “Come in.”

You open the door, closing it behind you. Their bedroom is tidier than usual, and it’s probably because you were coming over for the night. Most of their clothes are hanging in the living room, so the floor isn’t riddled with clothes compared to the living room.

“I told them to save some for you in case you wanna eat later. How’re you feeling?”

“I’m fin—.”

“Be honest.”

You take a seat at the edge of his bed. He sits up, placing his pillow on his lap and scooting closer to you.

“Okay, I have a question…and you have to be honest.”

“What is it?”

“Do I look like V-sunbaenim?”

You crease your eyebrows. “V-sunbaenim? As in, Kim Taehyung?”

He nods.

“You two look nothing alike.”

“Really?”

“Yes, you look like yourself.”

“…That’s not what people say. Everyone is always telling us that we look like BTS-sunbaenim or that everything we do reminds them of them. I don’t want to sound like a brat, but I really don’t like it. One second, they’re saying that Soobin looks like Jin-sunbaenim, and the other second, they’re calling Taehyun Jungkook-sunbaenim’s clone. Do we seriously look like them?”

It’s not only himself he’s concerned about, but the other members as well. After their debut, many news outlets exploded with articles about the similarities between them and their senior group. It was your typical cover page with a side-by-side comparison between two members, each from TXT and BTS, red circles around specific parts of their face and drawing arrows to each other. Some of them were outrageous claims, like how Soobin learned how to blow kisses from Seokjin even though Soobin only did it once and it was because the host of the radio show told him to do it.

Some people even went to the extreme and called TXT clout chasers, accusing the young boys for being too privileged. While they were treated with luxuries, they were bombarded with negative comments. It was to be expected, but they weren’t prepared for this extraordinary amount of dislike. Even when they did receive compliments, it never felt genuine because somehow and some way, the same people would draw comparisons to them to their seniors, crediting them for teaching TXT how to be polite.

“None of you guys look like them at all. If you think about it this way, and by no means am I disregarding your frustrations, you guys debuted during the peak of BTS’s popularity. These comparisons were bound to happen. All we can do now is be patient and wait for this to die down. Besides, you guys have a good amount of fans who aren’t forcing themselves to like you guys.”

Despite still being gloomy, you’re able to get Yeonjun to laugh, exhaling through his nose. He elbows your arm. “How are you so optimistic all the time?”

“Because I’ve seen pretty much every second of your rehearsals, and I’m always freakin’ impressed every time I watch. I can’t wait until people acknowledge it too.”

He hides his face in the pillow. “Yea…I can’t wait for that too.”

==========

After being appointed as their temporary manager, the first time you met them was in Los Angele. They looked so young and naïve back then. Beomgyu, Soobin, and Huening Kai had this sort of innocence in their eyes, like they needed to be guided constantly. Despite being the same age as Huening Kai, Taehyun was always calm and professional, never allowing his nervousness show. But as for Yeonjun…arrogant is what you would describe your first impression of him.

The way he stood firm, his chin up and his eyes looking down. You knew that he isn’t a bad person, but it’s just his posture that you never liked. It was like he stood above everyone, his hands in his pockets and constantly in his ‘cool’ pose like a model. Your suspicions of his arrogance came with confirmation when you learned that he’s ranked as number one in vocals, rap, and dance. To add on to the fire, he’s also a trainee for one of the biggest entertainment companies in South Korea, so it’s no surprise that he’s carrying a luggage full of reasons to feel proud.

Wow, this guy probably got everything handed to him, you thought to yourself. When you started your work as their manager, you put the least amount of attention on him. You assumed that since he’s the eldest and is already sufficient with every aspect of being an idol, you didn’t bother with putting in effort for him.

==========

You sit in a conference room with sales and marketing team. The lead of the team stands next to the projector, slamming a stack of paper on the table. The loud bang causes the other employees to jump, including you.

“61,400 only??” He exclaims. “Just 61k was sold?! Tell me what the fuck happened to the sales?!”

On the projector, there’s a bar graph of TXT’s sales history. It records the number of albums that were sold between the two albums: TDC Dream and TDC Magic.

“S-Sir…we tried our best…but it’s just that…”

“Don’t give me your fucking excuses. You all were riding on the expectation that these teens were gonna bring back the same numbers. This isn’t even enough to pay back the budget used to make the damn music video,” he sighs in frustration. “Jesus Christ. BTS are still on their break, but the amount they made off of their Summer Package is enough to pay for three music videos. We’re gonna have to ask for a lower budget for the second music video.”

You glance back at the chart. It hurts seeing their two albums stand side-by-side and that dramatic drop between them. Not only that, but their music video isn’t doing so well either. Compared to their debut music video, they didn’t even have half of what they got on the first day, going from fourteen million views on Crown to a little under five million for 9 and Three Quarters. This is still exponentially well in terms of rookie group standards, but there’s more to it—there are expectations to be met.

It could easily be excused that the video website’s streaming rules have changed, but to have that huge drop can’t simply be because of a system. It’s already been a few days, and the views are barely going up.

But what you’re mostly worried about is what the boys think about this. To have received so much attention in the beginning only to be pretty much dropped off the face of Earth is no simple feat.

==========

You return to the practice room where the boys are rehearsing with their choreographer. While their coach i flicks his eyes at you then returning back to work, none of the boys bat an eye at you, which is normal. They’re so focused on training that nothing can get them out of it.

Once they finish the entire song, their dance coach turns off their song. “Take five.”

Almost like they’ve been put out of a trance, they snapped to their usual selves, falling to the ground and breathing heavily. Huening Kai is the first to notice you, running to you with what little strength he has left.

“Managerrr!! Save me!” He yelps.

He wraps his arms around you, his hand clasping around your stomach, and you get a strong scent of sweat coming from him. Though, it doesn’t bother you since nearly every time you come into this room, they’re sweating logs.

“Kai is sexually harassing her.” Beomgyu teasingly shouts.

“What?! No, I’m not. Am I, Manager?” He looks at you with his puppy eyes.

“Not at all. How was practice today, guys?”

“We’re doing well! Just tightening some loose ends after we ended our first week of performing.” Soobin pulls Huening Kai away from you.

Huening Kai was about to whine, but Soobin passes a water bottle to him. Dying for water, Kai gives up the complaining for water, taking huge gulps.

“Loose ends? But I thought you guys did great on stage.”

“Not enough,” Beomgyu chimes in. “Our timing is off when we change positions.”

“Kai, don’t take too long to lift me up. If you take more than a second, then it messes up the rest of us.” Taehyun comments.

“Ah…okay…sorry.” He lowers his head.

“I think Kai is improving a lot. It’s so cute seeing him trying to lift Taehyun on his own.” Soobin touches shoulders with Huening Kai to cheer him up.

Huening Kai lets out a small chuckle while you’re adoring their playfulness. You glance at Yeonjun, glaring at himself in the mirror. He runs his hand through his sweaty hair. You don’t know what he’s thinking, but just by that serious look on his face alone, you can tell that he’s not happy.

“How was the meeting?” Soobin takes a sip from the water bottle.

“Uhm…it went okay.”

“What was it about again?”

“It’ll bore you guys if I explain it, so I rather not say. But they’re going to change things up a bit for the second music video’s filming.”

“Oh really?” Beomgyu asks. “Why?”

You can’t bring yourself to tell them the truth. They don’t go on the internet often, especially when it comes to anything that has anything to do with them, so they don’t know much about the records they break or don’t break. If they found out that the number of support they got for this comeback has become lackluster, then it’ll just devastate them.

“Uhm…change in artistic direction.” You pull that out of your ass.

They seem to take your word for it, so it makes you a little relieved. But while the other members moved on, one glance at Yeonjun and you knew that he isn’t convinced. Yeonjun opens his mouth to say something, so you quickly think of diverting this possibility.

“A-anyway, when rehearsals are done, we have to go to on some shows. I’ll let you guys know when it’s time to go.”

You walk out of the room, sighing. Just as you predicted, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell them the truth. How do you go about telling them that they didn’t do so well for this comeback? Not only that, but with your lack of experience as a manager, what can you say or do to encourage them? Even if you don’t tell them, they’ll find out eventually. And you already have a feeling that Yeonjun already does.

You peek through the crack of the door, watching the boys sitting down on the ground. Even though they’re supposed to take a break, they’re watching a recording of themselves to see if they can finds places to improve on.

==========

Yeonjun is in the center of the main dance practice room, free-styling to a song that infuses hip hop and heavy rap. The rest of the students are sitting by the walls. You sit with the other members as they’re just as mesmerized as the rest of the students. The way his body flows so smoothly with the rhythm is so satisfying to watch. If you didn’t know who he was, then you would’ve assumed that he was a coach or a celebrity, not a trainee.

You look at the other members. Soobin is like a high school girl experiencing their first love—his eyes are fixated on him, covering his gaping mouth in pure awe. Huening Kai is bopping his head to the song, more so enjoying the music itself than Yeonjun’s dance, although he still finds it entertaining to watch.

On the other hand, Beomgyu and Taehyun look jealous. Just one look and you can tell that in their heads, they’re most likely thinking, I can do that too. And that’s one thing you don’t particularly like about Yeonjun. He takes the spotlight and enjoys it. He doesn’t share any of it with the other boys. While you’re impressed by his dance, you don’t find his narcissism impressive in the slightly.

When the song ends, the entire class applauds. Soobin claps louder and faster than the rest of the students, bouncing up and down from his spot. The three younger members applaud as well. But Yeonjun doesn’t even look at his teammates. He waves his hands up like he wants the crowd to get louder.

“Okay, who wants to go next?” The coach asks.

A large number of students raise their hands, including Beomgyu. Although Taehyun makes it clear that he’s jealous of the attention that Yeonjun receives, he knows full well that he’s incapable of surpassing him in dance. Then there’s Soobin and Huening Kai who would rather be on the side.

After the coach chooses the next person to freestyle, you were expecting Yeonjun to sit with you and the boys. But to your surprise, he sits with other people, receiving high fives from the other students. It really ticks you off seeing him have the audacity to act like he’s too cool for the boys. You want to bring this up with them, but they don’t seem to particularly mind.

“That was fucking awesome, dude.” One of the students says in English.

“Thanks, I know I was cool.” Yeonjun replies in English as well.

You truly cannot find a reason to like Yeonjun even if he hasn’t done anything directly to you. He’s just so pompous and full of himself. When the members told you that he loves bragging about being ranked top in every category, they weren’t exaggerating. If anything, they weren’t exaggerating enough. With each passing day, Yeonjun starts hanging out less and less with the members unless it’s necessary, such as the private lessons with the five of them or when they’re filming for future projects. Perhaps it’s also the façade that he puts out a lot that you also don’t like. If you really are going to become their manager, you can’t picture yourself being close with him at all.

While you’re too busy finding reason to despise Yeonjun, you catch a glimpse of something. His hands are shaking a lot, but he tries to hide it by putting his hands behind his back.

==========

“You guys look so cute!!” You clasp your hands together.

The boys walk out of their dressing room in matching pink sailor outfits. Your jaw drops at how absolutely adorable they look in them—like anime characters coming to life. When their appearance on the show goes on air, their fans will definitely go insane.

“Huening Kai and Taehyun are the cutest.”

Huening Kai’s cheeks turn pink from your compliment while Taehyun looks indifferent. You turn to Soobin and Beomgyu, and they fit into the cute concept as well.

“I’d prefer something that shows off my more adult side…” Soobin puffs his cheeks while nodding his head.

The way he sulks only amplifies his cuteness. The outfits complement their physical appearance except for their overarching height. But after doing a head count, you notice that there’s somebody missing. You look around, and the eldest is nowhere to be found.

“Where’s Yeonjun?”

“I think he’s still in the dressing room.”

“I’m gonna go get him.”

You walk to the dressing room, knocking three times. “Yeonjun? You in there?”

“Yea.”

“You almost done? You guys have to go on in a few minutes.”

“Y-yea, just give me a second.”

Yeonjun twists the doorknob, opening it and peeking his head out. You cross your arms, waiting for him to completely walk out, but he’s too embarrassed to show himself.

“What’s wrong?”

“I look dumb.”

You scoff. “I’m sure you look fine.”

“No…”

“Come on, it’s not as bad as you think it is. Besides, the other boys are wearing it too, so you’re not alone.”

“It’s just…”

“You’re fine!”

Feeling impatient, you pull him out of the room. Just as you thought, he’s wearing the sailor uniform like the rest of them. He tries to stand in a masculine pose, slouching his back slightly and putting his hands in his pocket. You can tell he feels humiliated to be in this outfit.

“See? You look cute.”

“That’s the problem. Just because we’re young doesn’t mean that we have to dress like kids. I’m twenty-one for crying out loud.”

“Twenty-one and rocking that look. Come on, even if it looks childish, you can still make it look cool,” you check the time on your phone. “Oh, they’re waiting for us. Let’s go.”

Just as you were about to walk away, you look back to find Yeonjun not moving from his spot. He’s still sulking about the clothes. This is bothering him more than you thought, and you wish you can do something about it, but with the limited time that they have, you can’t change the stylist’s mind.

“Yeonjun?”

“…I want to wear suits like BTS-sunbaenim.”

You freeze, everything around you falling silent. You try thinking of anything to make him feel better, but with every direction you go, it doesn’t form proper sentences. You can think of the usual ‘don’t think too much about it’ or ‘you look great in the outfit’, but they’re shallow assurance, and it won’t make him feel any better.

“You guys are on in five minutes!” A staff member shouts from the room.

“Okay!” You let the staff know before turning back to Yeonjun. “Let’s go.”

That’s all you could say, and it made you seem disingenuous. If only there was a way to make him feel better, but with being a new manager, it also comes with many trial and errors, including some major and minor mistakes. You sort of feel pathetic for not thinking of any clever quotes to cheer him up.

==========

You stand on the other side of the cameras as the five boys speak to the hosts, a man and a woman. They’re dressed in a ridiculous amount of pink, and the entire room itself is fluttered with pink too. Despite the pinkness, the other side is contrasted with silent darkness, sound producers, scriptwriters, and cameramen being blanketed with the damp blackness of the studio while the members and two hosts are riddled with twenty shades of pink.

Since they’re still new to the showbiz world, they’re as stiff as usual, but unlike their debut, they’ve loosened up a bit more. They’re moving around and smiling more, which is a huge step forward. However, despite their more natural side are shown in a better light, Yeonjun is rigid. His hands are behind his back, not moving an inch. And that smile that you know is forced.

“We’re really happy to have K-pop’s next big boy group be on the show!” The male host shouts with an exaggerated enthusiasm. “Tomorrow by Together is known as the monster rookie group, already hitting records and completing their first US tour.”

The five boys clap, cheering sarcastically.

“Despite being so young, they’re pretty tall. On average, their height is 181.3 cm, which is an amazing record on its own. None of you guys have a fixed position either, both in talents and looks!” The female host chimes in.

Everything seems to be going well so far. This show is known for portraying each individual members’ special talents, so this is a great opportunity for the boys to stand out on their own.

“Let’s introduce each member from right to left. Taehyun.”

“Yes.”

As usual, Taehyun is excellent in professional settings. Despite his young age, he knows how to think and act on the spot, improvising and thinking of the right words to say. His timing is never off, and he can read the atmosphere without a problem. It makes the audience, even you, forget that he’s a teenager.

The hosts go through each member, showing off more of their personalities. On the opposite end of the spectrum is Huening Kai. Unlike Taehyun who remains calm yet makes witty comments, Huening Kai is less prepared, but he balances that out with his bubbly personality. He laughs to lighten the mood, knowing how to recover from an embarrassing mistake and turning it into a joke.

Although upon first impression, Beomgyu seemed like the kind of guy who doesn’t mind the shy and cute concept, he’s a natural when it comes to being charismatic and masculine. He can talk to anybody and make it appear like they’ve been friends for years. He doesn’t let the air become awkward and is able to fill it up.

Soobin is the one who makes the most mistakes, his mind often trailing off and messing up his lines. He lets the nervousness take over him, often laughing and hugging the closest member to release some tension. Despite the many mistakes, he repeats himself until he perfects it. His cycle of making and fixing his slip-ups makes the hosts find it endearing.

Last person is Yeonjun. When the hosts lay their eyes on him, he nods and forces a smile.

“Now…last but not least, Choi Yeonjun: born on September 13th, the oldest member, been the trainee the longest and is ranked number one on all three categories, vocals, rap, and dance. Wow, that’s a lot for one person.”

“Yes.” He answers.

“Even though I think you’re all very handsome men, I think you should also be ranked number one in terms of visual too.”

“Ah…” he laughs nervously. “Thank you.”

“I mean, you deserve that title! You have a lot of resemblance with your BTS senior, V-ssi.”

And with that, the light in his eyes disappears.

“You have the hair color, the eyes, and the striking visuals in general. I think you two are even the same height.”

“Ah ha ha…yes.”

Huening Kai is the first to sense Yeonjun’s discomfort, so he steps in to make a comment. “Yeonjun-hyung was always the first trainee to introduce himself. He would take us to the whiteboard with the rankings and ask who was number one in each category. We were all shocked when he said that it was him.”

“Oh, really? Okay, let’s give Yeonjun a chance to show off his skills, starting off with dance.”

Yeonjun steps forward, and to your side, the producers choose a song to put on. Unsurprisingly, they put on a BTS song, Dope. Within seconds, Yeonjun got the gist of the beat and dances to the song accordingly. He doesn’t make a single mistake despite the lack of practice, which is remarkable on its own.

They then put on the next song, which happens to be Boy in Luv. Unlike the fast-pace dancing, it switches to a slower tempo, but he has to show more of his aggressive side. And just like that, he’s got the choreography memorized as well. Once again, they switch the song, but…it’s another BTS song, Fake Love.

This wasn’t a part of the script. They were supposed to play other pop songs and some American music to give him the chance to freestyle. With this last-minute change, Yeonjun falters, only knowing the basics to the Fake Love choreography, but not grasping onto the details that well.

The female host signals the music to stop. “How do you mess up one of their recent songs? Fake Love is played everywhere. You two are in the same company and got more chances to see them practice. You should know their songs to heart.”

Although that was supposed to be a joke, Yeonjun took it personally. You can see that her words have pierced through his chest. You don’t like how she’s putting him on the spot with unrealistic expectations.

“Okay,” the male host interrupts. “Let’s try again but with a different song.”

He waves his hand down, cueing for the next song to play. Yeonjun shakes his hands and spreads his legs out shoulder length, determined to get this one right. The producer plays the song, and it’s Boy with Luv.

Yeonjun freezes. He hasn’t learned this dance because this song came out during the most hectic training period. They were practicing to their songs nonstop as well as performing on stages.

The female host makes it very apparent that she’s disappointed. “Stop, stop, stop. It’s okay, even if you don’t know your seniors’ songs that well, you should at least know this one. It’s simple to learn and it’s their latest song.”

Yeonjun chuckles nervously. “You’re right…”

It’s agonizing to watch this host tear Yeonjun down. There’s clearly some bias here, and she’s going at him more than the other members. It might be because he’s been the trainee the longest or because of his title as the ‘monster trainee’ to increase her expectations on him, this is still borderline harassment. Thankfully, the other members are seeing this as well, so they look at each other, almost like using telepathy to back up their eldest member.

Soobin raises his hand. “Taehyun and Beomgyu have memorized the dance.”

“Oh really?”

“That’s right,” Beomgyu steps forward. “I’ve been a hardcore fan of BTS even before I became a trainee. I’ve studied every single thing, including the timing of their facial expressions.”

“I also enjoy listening to Jungkook-sunbaenim’s English covers. I know all his cover songs by heart.” Taehyun enters the conversations calmly.

This is off-script, but it’s a relief that you can rely on the members to help each other out of a pinch. You nonverbally sigh, but your troubles haven’t left you. It was the members who had to help, and you couldn’t do anything. Not only that, but the deed has already been done. To see the sunken spirit in Yeonjun’s eyes, it hurts. You wish you can reach your hand out to tell him that everything’s alright, you can’t just interrupt recording. All you can do is watch from afar.

==========

In the hallway, Yeonjun is just walking out of the restroom after changing back into his street clothes. Opposite to the cute sailor outfits, he’s wearing a leather jacket and blue jeans, with tan boots that completes it all. Even though you liked both outfits that he was wearing today, nothing beats Yeonjun dressed in the clothes that he’s more confident in.

Standing outside of the men’s restroom is you. He’s caught off-guard to see you waiting. “What are you doing here?”

“I just felt like it.”

“Where are the other guys?”

“They’re still changing. Why didn’t you tell me that you went to the restroom?”

“It was just a quick whizz.”

“You should still tell me.”

He walks back to the room and you follow him from behind. “You’re not my mom.”

“But I’m technically your mom!”

“That’s…let’s not get there. Aren’t you our age?”

“I dunno, am I?”

With this conversation going nowhere, he stops. Even though he sounds a bit harsh, you know that he doesn’t mean to. Today’s show recording was definitely unfair, so it’s not a surprise to see Yeonjun down in the dumps.

“Good job today.”

“Thanks, but I don’t feel like I did well. Not even average or decent.”

“Hey, but you got it over with and that’s all that matters. Now, onto the next one!”

“Yea…”

Despite your efforts in cheering him up, it doesn’t work. Pretending like the issue doesn’t exist isn’t going to make things better for him.

“What that host said, it’s still bothering you, huh?”

He can’t hide from you as well. “You got me. This feeling kinda sucks…”

“I can tell. I don’t think she means it though.”

“You’re siding with her?”

“I’m not. Yea, what she did was really horrible, but everyone’s caught up in the heat where they want to only talk about your seniors. TV shows are dying for BTS to be on their show, but they’re too busy touring. It’s rude, but even for other bands, your sunbaenims are constantly brought up.”

“That’s true…”

“Besides, that doesn’t matter. Anyway, I’m gonna drop by the convenient store to buy some snacks. What do you want?”

“…Can I go with you?”

“What? No, you should be resting! Take every chance to take a nap, relax your muscles, or play some video games! Don’t do something as boring as coming with me to the store.”

“It’s not boring to me. Going to the store with you soothes my nerves. No joke.”

Your cheeks turn red when he grins. It’s been a while since you last saw him smile like that, so you can’t say no to him.

==========

Seoul is filled with your stereotypical description of the urban lifestyle—honking cars, citizens striding through thick crowds of people, and flashing lights at every corner. Since it’s night, the skyscrapers are covered in squares of screens that display an array of advertisements such as drinks, clothes, and latest phone models.

You and Yeonjun are two out of millions going through the city and back to the studio. Despite wearing a mask and beanie to cover his identity, he still stands out like a sore thumb. Girls can’t help but glance and admire his towering, lean body.

“Ah, I really like times like these when we get to go out and enjoy the city air.” You point your nose to the sky and inhale.

“You mean the pollution and bacteria traveling into your nostrils?”

You elbow him. “You didn’t have to phrase it like that!”

He laughs.

One thing you like about this is not only breaking away from the busy life in the entertainment business, but being with Yeonjun. Behind the cameras, he’s an ordinary young adult who enjoys the little things, like walking in the city and making jokes. He doesn’t have to put up a show or be conscious of how he dresses and correcting his posture. He doesn’t have to censor his words and can say whatever he wishes.

You get a text message, and it’s from the group chat. “Taehyun said that Beomgyu is starving to death. Let’s hurry.”

You pick up the pace and so does Yeonjun. You two pass by many small shops that are surviving each day to make ends meet. Some of them are antique shops, record stores, and clothing lines. One of them is a toy store. If you could, you would love to go to them but with very little spare time you have in your hands, it’s too far into the future for you think about it.

You look up at the night sky and notice how particularly cloudy it is. Not only that, but the weather has been getting colder these days.

“Geez, I think it’s gonna rain soon. What do you think, Yeonjun?”

No response.

“Yeonjun?”

You turn around and find Yeonjun standing in front of the toy store. He’s staring down at a table that’s filled with a mix of toys. You tilt your head, curious about what caught his eye.

“Is there something you want?”

He remains quiet.

You look down, there’s one particular toy that stands out to you, which could explain why he stopped. You pick up a box with a doll of the BTS member, V, inside. The plastic cover has been battered up, and the doll’s hair is a mess. The limbs are sprawled in directions that a human bones can’t replicate. All in all, it’s a pitiful sight to bear, but what makes it even more tragic is that this outdoor table is for toys that are on discount.

“I remember when the dolls were announced, everyone went crazy for it.” Yeonjun comments.

He was still a trainee at that time, but he already knew about it before the public did. You did too, but you didn’t think too much about it since nearly everything related to BTS becomes impactful to the world.

“But…look at where it is now. It has its quirks in the beginning, but after a while, this doll will never compare to the real person. It’s a temporary escape from the reality that you’ll never get to be with the real V-sunbaenim.”

The way he words it…is so depressing. This is unlike Yeonjun to be spilling poetic lines. You stare at the doll, and the doll glares back at you. You wonder what the doll’s journey was like, from factory to this clearance table.

“It’s just a doll. I’m sure it’ll find an owner,” you assure him. “Let’s hurry back before they get upset.”

He turns to you as if you offended him, not the doll. But he looks away with a troubled look, ultimately plastering a nonconsensual smile. You know you said something wrong, but you don’t know what it is.

“Manager…” Yeonjun calls out.

“Yea?”

“…I’m…different from V-sunbaenim, right?”

This isn’t a hard question, and yet you’re having a hard time answering it. It’s because if you answer either ‘yes’ or ‘no’, they both carry heavy context behind them. It’s plainly obvious how Yeonjun will feel if you say ‘no’, but saying ‘yes’ would also feel shallow depending on the tone. In this situation, how do you answer?

“…You’re fine just the way you are.” You say it with a tone as plain as cardboard.

You can’t decipher his expression, and it worries you more. It’s like you nailed the coffin perfectly and just made his mood worse.

Without putting much thought into it, you take him by his hand, holding it tightly. He’s confused, but you muster a smile. “Come on, stay close so that we don’t separate. You’re the one carrying Soobin’s snacks. He’ll cry if we lose it.”

You drag him along with you. As you walk forward with him in hand, you make quick glances behind to check on him. His sullen expression still remains, and it makes you all the more conflicted. You don’t know exactly what’s going on in his head, but you’re too afraid to ask, thinking that he might just brush off your worries as meaningless thinking.

==========

“Kai, don’t cry.” Soobin pats him on the back.

Occupying a private dance room in Los Angeles, Huening Kai is sitting in a fetal position, wiping his eyes with his hands. Soobin and Taehyun are on their knees, one person on each side. You sit in front of him, thinking of ways to encourage him.

“You’re overreacting. You did everything fine.” Taehyun adds on.

“I can’t dance. I’m really bad at it.” He mutters to himself.

“Have some water and let’s be chirpy again!” Beomgyu kneels down and passes him a bottle of water, but he doesn’t accept it.

“I shouldn’t have tried to become an idol. I don’t like, I hate this. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

“Huening Kai, don’t say that,” You put your hands over his. “You’re doing great.”

But it doesn’t seem like your message has crossed over. It’s understandable that Huening Kai gets into moods like this, especially being under immense pressure despite only living fifteen years of his life. To be so young yet feel defeated makes your eyes water.

Standing on the other side of the room is Yeonjun, still rehearsing. You’re a little annoyed that he more interested in himself than Huening Kai. You give him dagger eyes, waiting for him to do something, but nothing happens.

“Yeonjun, can’t you at least take your eyes off of yourself for a second?” You pout.

“Manager, don’t…! It’s okay!” Huening Kai begs.

He finally turns to your direction, staring back at you as you glare. He scratches the back of his head, approaching Huening Kai until he crouches in front of him.

“If this is too much for you, then why don’t you just quit?”

Huening Kai gasps, and so does the rest of you. You have the urge to smack him across the face, wondering how he could ask that question when Kai is already at his lowest.

“I don’t want to…”

“Why? You’re the one who keeps complaining about how hard it is.”

Huening Kai looks conflicted, like his words are biting back at him.

“Yeonjun, don’t—”

But Soobin stops you by putting his hand on your shoulder. While you don’t know what’s going on, it seems like the rest of the boys do.

“I don’t want to quit.”

Yeonjun’s serious expression then switches that of an upbeat grin. He pats him on the back, pulling him for a neck hug.

“You say that you want to quit, but deep down, you want to keep going. The moment negative thoughts start passing through your head, shut them out immediately and start finding compliments for yourself.”

“But…that’s a bit self-serving…”

He shakes his head. “Conceited people compliment themselves as a means of building a wall to avoid their ego from being hurt. Confident people are so confident in themselves that they want others to succeed too. Come on, let’s keep practicing. Show me what you need help with and I’ll do my best to help.”

“Me too!” Soobin raises his hand.

“I’ll take part too.” Taehyun adds.

“Hey! Don’t leave me out either!” Beomgyu shouts.

These boys will never stop amazing you, but it also makes you feel bad. You feel like you didn’t do anything, and Yeonjun, once again, knows what to say and do. It makes you feel insecure—like you’re not cut out for the job. Once again, it’s Yeonjun overpowering someone’s abilities.

And despite disliking it, you can’t help but see Yeonjun in a more positive light. You thought that he didn’t care about the other members, but it doesn’t seem like the case all the time.

==========

You’re in the van with the rest of the boys and the driver. This time, they’re dressed in more formal attire, wearing suits. You’re glad that Yeonjun is a little more confident in himself now that he’s wearing what he wanted, but there’s still that lingering sense of gloom that floats around him.

The driver is playing songs on the radio while the boys are busy playing on their phones. Many overplayed songs play on the radio, some that you are still in love with and others where you’re getting sick of.

BTS’s song plays, and already, you can sense Yeonjun feeling uncomfortable. His raises his shoulders, scratching his head more than usual. You can see his distraught being played in the rear-view mirror.

“Excuse me, can you turn off the radio?”

“Oh yea, sure.” He turns it off.

You look back in the mirror, and he’s look like he’s fine, though a little disturbed. He clears his throat, looking at the reflection in his mirror and fixing his hair. Every time the driver hits a bump, Yeonjun would look at his phone’s camera’s portrait mode to fix his hair.

Drawing near the red carpet, the boys get ready to prepare for their walk. They can already hear hundreds of screams, and it only gets louder as they get closer. They check themselves one last time, making sure that every detail is perfect. Through the windows, there are fans screaming and waving at them.

“Alright, good luck, guys! Go make the crowd go wild!” You cheer them on.

They cheer back right as the car parks. In an instant, they shut their mouths, preparing for flashing lights from cameras and the nonsensical screams. They come out one by one, and you wait until they’ve walked enough so that you can enter. You don’t like being in the spotlight, so you rather distance yourself from situations such as these.

Just as planned, the boys stride through the red carpet professionally, waving and throwing finger hearts at fans. Once the crowd turn their heads away from your direction, you speed out of the car, wearing your face mask and parka to hide your identity. You speed to the backdrop where the five boys stand and pose for the hosts of the red carpet.

Behind the photo scene, you watch from behind as a barrage of camera flashes blind your vision. You can barely make shape of the members’ bodies. Judging how the situation is going, they seem to be handling it well. This isn’t the first time they were in front of this many cameras on a carpet walkway, so it’s not surprising that they’re doing well on their own.

“As BTS’s juniors, they’re doing amazing by breaking records of their own and standing out internationally, as well as in Korea. Coming back to the spotlight after two delays of their comeback, they returned with their first full-length album The Dream Chapter: Magic. It’s extremely rare that a rookie group is able to release a full album so soon, so they have a lot to show their fans. And speaking of fans, please pose for them, Tomorrow by Together!” The male host announces.

And doing what they’re told, they immediately start posing, raising their hands up to make hearts. They tilt their heads, some of them smiling and others, like Beomgyu and Yeonjun, making serious expressions. Fans are cheering for them, jumping and waving their hands at them but also hiding their faces behind cameras larger than their heads. They even have built-in lenses that are so large that it makes the cameras look like telescopes.

“Is there anything you would like to tell your fans?” The male host passes the microphone to Yeonjun.

He takes it, waving before taking a second to think about what he wants to say. “First of all, thank you to the MOAs who have been supporting us with our newest title track, 9 and Three Quarters. We worked very hard and put all our passion into each song in the album, so we would really appreciate it if every one of you also sup—”

Suddenly, someone throws an egg at Yeonjun, aimed perfectly at his head. The shell cracks into a million pieces, the raw components splattering all over his face. While the crowd gasps in horror, Yeonjun is in complete shock. During their years of training to deal with not only being exposed to passionate fans but also hate groups.

Among the crowd is a woman wearing sunglasses, a face mask, and a black beanie. She’s wearing all in black and is holding a carton of eggs in her arms.

“YOU’RE A PARASITE TO BTS. YOU LEECH OFF OF THEM TO MAKE EFFORTLESS CASH. THEY WORKED SO HARD ONLY FOR YOU TO TAKE IT AWAY. YOU DIDN’T DESERVE ROOKIE OF THE YEAR AWARD. YOU’RE ALL FUCKING SCUM AND DESERVE TO DIE IN A SHITHOLE.”

She grabs more eggs to throw at Yeonjun. Bodyguards are sprinting toward her, but with so many people in the way, it’s taking longer to get to her. The staff from behind the backdrop, including you, are rushing onto the scene to grab the boys. But Yeonjun is furthest away from the exit, and the host next to him has ran off. In a state of panic, the staff and guards can only think about saving the idols who are closest to them, but no one is running to Yeonjun.

He’s frozen in shock, still processing what just happened as the egg whites drip from his hair. Even though everything is moving fast, it’s like time has slowed down, giving you milliseconds to think about your next moves. But some of her eggs fail to reach Yeonjun like the first attempt. With the guards tailing in on her, she dashes toward him, grabbing a fan’s large, expensive camera, lunging it back and readying it to hit Yeonjun with it.

Then that’s when Yeonjun’s bright, loving smile flashes through your mind. You thought about all the times you’ve spent with him laughing, playing games, and eating junk food with him. He used to be so happy, and it made your chest warm when you saw him in love with being an idol.

So…when did it start falling apart?

And the last frame in your mind was the first time you’ve ever seen him cry. All alone and on the ground, begging for his stress to go away. He repeats over and over that he wants to give up—the same trainee that was ranked number one, the same guy who everyone dismisses his five years of brutal training as ‘his seniors’ privileged little brother’, the same boy who you disliked because you made an assumption about him before you got to know him.

The next thing you know, you’re standing in between Yeonjun and the camera that the woman has thrown. In that brief moment, you and Yeonjun make eye contact. He looks so scared, like a child who’s been traumatized. But you don’t want him to keep making that face, so in the midst of the chaos, you smile, letting him know that everything will be alright.

Then your vision turns black.

==========

You clasp onto the door frame, your mouth hanging open. You thought you heard Yeonjun wrong. This is the same guy who you thought that he’s full of himself. But to see him on the ground, crying his eyes out, it was like reality hitting you really hard that trainee life can take a toll even on the most gifted of trainees, even Yeonjun.

“What did you say?” Unbeknownst to you, there was another person in the room. It’s their main choreography coach. “You’re quitting? You’re more pathetic than I thought.”

His coach crouches, knocking on Yeonjun’s head harshly.

“You’re so full of yourself that you’ve forgotten how much you’re a fucking sore eye to watch when you dance. Your feet and back is hurting? Bullshit. Those are excuses that quitters make. You think you can keep being number one with that mindset?”

How have you’ve never seen this up until now? How can this crude man be considered a coach?

“I’m sorry, I won’t say it again.” Yeonjun mutters as he sniffs, but he hasn’t stopped crying.

“Might as well make Taehyun number one. He’s doing great and he doesn’t whine like you. And he’s pretty young, too. He’ll top you in no time, and you’ll be last because you’re incompetent.”

Even bringing up the other members makes you sick. There’s something twisted about how he puts down Yeonjun’s spirit by comparing him to the other boys. While competition is great, this is just outright creating unnecessary rivalry. It now makes sense why Yeonjun distanced himself from the other boys; it was the work of this man. He made him fear his own teammates.

“Sitting around and shitting yourself isn’t going to make you a better dancer. Get the fuck up and keep practicing.”

But Yeonjun is hesitant to get up which irritates the coach.

“What are you still doing? Get. Up.”

“But…sir…it’s almost lunch time. The other members are back in the room…and they’re waiting for me.”

“Do I hear a goddamn wimp talking again?”

He immediately shakes his head. “No.”

“Then get up and stop crying. I’ll let you eat when you’ve finished thinking about what you did wrong. Besides…” he pinches Yeonjun’s cheeks. “No girl wants a guy who has fat on their face.”

He swipes Yeonjun’s face away, getting up and stomping out of the room. In the brink of time, you were able to hide behind the door while he walks out. He does what he’s told and gets up, and you cover your mouth when you realize the horror that’s been going on behind the scenes.

You can’t just hide. You want to talk to him, you want to know if he’s okay. If this is how their coach treats Yeonjun, you can’t imagine what he does to the other members.

You peek your head into the room, seeing as he’s already returns to dancing. He’s rubbing his feet and back like it’s in pain. You never noticed this before, but he has a lot of scars and burises on his arms and legs, most likely from excessive practicing. Some are old, some are new. He’s always worn long sleeves during practice and filming, at least long enough to hide them.

However, you’ve been staring for too long that you catch Yeonjun’s attention. You both are startled, but Yeonjun immediately wipes his eyes to hide his wet eyes.

“Wh-what are you doing here? I thought you were with the rest.”

You shake your head. “I came here to let you know that we’re going to get lunch.”

“It’s okay, I’m not hungry.”

You curl your lips inward, trying to fight the urge to cry. You don’t want to make it seem like you eavesdropped, but it’s too late.

“You…heard everything, didn’t you?”

You don’t reply.

“Ah…so embarrassing…”

“I’m…sorry.” You murmur.

“What?”

“I didn’t know.”

You step forward, falling into Yeonjun’s arms. He’s confused, trying to push you away, but you won’t let him.

“What are you sorry for?”

You’re not sorry for listening to their conversation. You’re sorry for making the wrong assumption about him. Because of that, you deemed him as the villain who only wants to win for himself. You feel immensely guilty for pushing him aside without putting much thought. But now looking back, you were wrong for making up thoughts based on how he acted and look.

“I’ll do everything in my power to make sure that that coach is fired.”

“Wh-what…? You don’t have to.”

“No! I have to! I don’t want you to debut with that way of thinking! You’re better than what he makes you to be.”

He’s at a loss of words. He’s hesitant about putting his arms around you, but he ultimately does it. His hands are shaking so much, and you aren’t sure if it’s because of malnourishment from extreme dieting or if he’s scared.

“I’m okay…really…” Yeonjun chuckles as he fails to fight back his tears. “I’m okay…I’m fine. I’m fine…I’m…okay…I’m…not…”

He starts crying louder and louder, though not too loud so the coach can hear. He lowers his back, though slowly because his spine is in excruciating pain from so much dancing. He buries his face into your shoulder, sobbing. He clutches onto the back of your shirt, not wanting to let go of this warmth. You can tell by how awkward he wraps his arms around you that he doesn’t hug that often.

Those years of pressure to keep up with his reputation is catching up to him. Everyone may think he’s a super trainee who will undoubtedly succeed, but at the end of the day, he’s still a trainee. You may never fully know what he exactly endured, but imagine five years, 1,825 days, that he had to suffer thinking that he’ll never debut. His naïve dreams of inspiring others with his performances slowly diminishing as time went by, fleeting into dust when he realizes that he may never debut.

That’s why he’s so conceited—hiding away his anxiety and fears of never being able to show the world those five years of torturous training. He built himself up so high because he wanted to believe that he’ll make it, and he wanted to convince others of that too because he never truly did. In the darkness, he was scared that the scars he received, the mental beatings, and the physical pains were for nothing. After all, a narcissistic person tries to hide his flaws rather than having enough confidence to help others.

He was so deep in his vicious thoughts that he forgot what it was like to be comforted. That’s probably why he’s holding onto you so tightly, because he’s afraid that he won’t have another chance to feel this vulnerable. What started as a rocky relationship, he became your harsh reality of the music industry, but you have become his therapy.

But this escape-therapy can only go so far.

==========

You regain consciousness, and the first thing you see is a white ceiling. You hear a monitor beating to your side. You turn your head, seeing the four boys sitting next to you. They’re all frozen, like they can’t believe that you’re awake.

“MANAGER!! I…! You…! Alive!!” Soobin bursts into tears.

He throws himself onto you, losing your breath because of his heavy weight pressing against your chest. Your heart rate increases on the motor, so Huening Kai immediately pulls him off of you.

“Are you trying to kill her?!”

“I’m…I’m…I’m…just so happy!” He’s like a broken faucet that can’t stop crying.

Beomgyu and Taehyun are also crying, though Taehyun tries to hide it with his hand. It doesn’t help when you can see his tears landing on his lap.

“How are you feeling?!” Beomgyu asks.

“I’m…so sleepy…Where am I?” You try getting up.

But Huening Kai pushes your shoulders back down. “Don’t get up! You need all the rest you can get.”

After wiping the tears away, Taehyun clears his throat. “A criminal threw a camera at Yeonjun-hyung, but you managed to get in between, but you ended up getting hurt and got an injury to the head.”

“Calling her a criminal is a bit too much…” Huening Kai states.

“Too much or not, she still committed a crime because she had intent on harming us, especially our hyung. If we weren’t in public, then I would’ve done anything to stop her. But my ideas would’ve sent me to prison.”

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“IDIOT!!!” Beomgyu shouts suddenly.

His loud voice startles you, creating a spike in your heartbeat monitor. You’re jokingly beginning to think that them being in the room with you is going to do more harm to your body.

“Why did you try to tried acting like a hero?! During times like that, you have to save yourself!!” He keeps on crying and let his nose run.

Honestly, you don’t know either. Your feet moved on its own, and your only goal was to ensure Yeonjun’s safety. And speaking of Yeonjun, he’s nowhere to be found.

“Where’s Yeonjun?”

“Yeonjun-hyung…he…” Huening Kai pauses.

“Hyung is back at the dorms. Because of the assault, we had to temporarily pause activity in the meantime. We were also checked and we’re fine.”

“But Hyung…” Beomgyu trails off.

Your heart drops, fearing for the worse.

“He—”

“He was just a little startled,” Taehyun continues. “He’s taking a break in the dorms right now.”

You sigh in relief. The anticipation was really killing you. It makes sense that he’s still a little shaken up because the threat was aimed toward him, after all. But despite the assurance, you can’t help but worry.

“Is it okay to leave him by himself…?” You ask.

“We were just about to leave to check on him. We’ll let the nurses know that you woke up and we’ll be on our way. We’ll text you if something comes up.” Taehyun says.

Soobin, who’s still riddled with tears, places his hands over yours. “Manager, please eat a lot. Call us immediately if something happens. Text us through Kakao, but if you absolutely have to, then use our actual phone number. Don’t try to do anything on your own and have the nurses assist you. And I know how much you stress out about us, so every morning, afternoon, and evening, I’m going to remind you not to worry. If it makes you feel better, I’ll leave voicemails about what each of us did for that day too. Here, I’ll set up three alarm clocks to remind myself to text you every day.”

Right as he whips his phone out, you raise your hand up to stop him. “N-no, it’s okay.”

“Okay, we’ll be leaving.” Huening Kai winks at you.

“Call me when you guys make it back to the dorms.”

“Yes, yes worry-wart.”

==========

“Why did you lie to her?!” Beomgyu shouts.

“I didn’t want to lie, but I thought it was better that way,” Taehyun crosses his arms.

“But she’s already concerned for Hyung as it is. Lying won’t make it any better!!” Beomgyu’s loud voice draws attention.

Panicked, Soobin shushes him. “Beomgyu, please! People are staring.”

“You do realize that if we tell her, then all she’s ever gonna try and do is sneak out of the hospital and look for him on his own, right? She won’t listen to us if we still that Hyung still comes home every night.”

“But…he’s gone all day, and we don’t know where he goes. We’ve already tried talking to him, but he won’t listen to us!!”

“I think Taehyun’s right,” Huening Kai raises his hand. “At least for now, we should at least keep it a secret until she’s recovered. It’ll just stress her out even more if we tell her now.”

“I agree with the both of them.” Soobin also votes.

Beomgyu looks at the three of them, unable to believe they would continue with this falsity. However, they do have a point. Your stress levels have definitely spiked ever since their comeback, and adding more to that isn’t going to make you rest, but freak out more.

“Al…alright. But we have to tell her soon!”

“Yes, we will,” Taehyun says. “Just. Don’t. Tell. Her.”

He warns all of them, but particularly at Beomgyu. Even though Taehyun says that, he has a strong feeling that Beomgyu will give in to the weight.

==========

Thankfully, the injury to your head isn’t that serious. For the next two days, you remain in the hospital to double check that you can function properly without any disruptions to your brain.

Unsurprisingly, the attack became international news. Accusations were placed everywhere, with fans blaming the awards ceremony for not having high security. Even though fan outrage is to be expected, getting angry over it can’t undo what has already happened. In your opinion, you wish that rather than focusing their attention toward blaming the ceremony, they should be more focused on the wellbeing of the boys. Thankfully, there are fans who worry more about them than award show functionality.

For the last two days, the boys have been taking a short hiatus. They can’t even enter the Big Hit building because there are so many journalists crowding at every entrance. To the best of your luck, Big Hit has never publically shared which hospital you’re staying at, so there are no journalists anywhere here. It makes it easier for the members to visit you during their free time.

Just as Soobin promised, he’s been updating you about the boys. They seem to be doing well, even sending you an entire essay about each member in exquisite detail, with the exception of Yeonjun. For him, Soobin would keep it very vague, and it doesn’t make matters any better when Yeonjun’s the only person who hasn’t visited you. They keep telling you that he’s fine, but you want to see it for yourself.

“Yay! You’re leaving tomorrow morning!” Beomgyu claps his hands.

Today, it’s only Beomgyu who came. Huening Kai and Taehyun had to stay after school to make up a few tests that they missed, and Soobin had already visited you in the morning. Beomgyu is still in his school uniform and he brought some candy for you snack on.

“Yea, I feel like I was going insane being cooped up in this room all day. I guess it’s true that when you see the color white all the time, it makes you go crazy.” You laugh.

“But just because you leave the hospital doesn’t mean that you should go back to your usual routine. Take things slowly. I can play as the manager while you heal!” Beomgyu points to himself with his thumb.

“Uh…it’s okay. If you’re the manager, then the group is going to be in shambles within weeks,” you elbow him. “I’m just kidding. Thanks for volunteering to do that though. That’s mature of you to take responsibility.”

“Anything for you.” Beomgyu holds your hand and sways it up and down as he giggles.

He lets go of your hand then looks out the window, exhaling carbon. The skies are covered with gray clouds.

“Ah…I hope the sky becomes happier when you leave. I want the entire world to be happy when you get out!”

You chuckle. “That’s so adorable. Thank you.”

“But I do hope that this bad weather makes the news reporters just leave was alone. They’ve been camping out in front of the building.”

“Oh yea, on the same topic as that, no one’s been harassing you guys about the whole ordeal, right?”

He shakes his head. “These big scary guards have been protecting us, so we’ve been protected very well.”

“And how’s Yeonjun?”

Beomgyu freezes. You wait for him to reply, but when he takes longer than he should, that’s when you realize that something’s going on.

“…He is doing fine…right?”

“Ye…yea…! He is! He’s terrific, fine, excellent, phenomenal, exuberant!”

But you aren’t convinced. “Beomgyu, don’t lie to me.”

“I-I’m not lying!” He laughs nervously. “Why would I lie to you?”

“Please, tell me the truth.”

With your serious yet calmly desperate tone, he can’t hide it anymore. After a few days of keeping it a secret, he has to tell you. “Hyung has been going out a lot. We don’t know where he goes, but when we ask, he won’t tell us. When he does come home, he goes straight to bed and sleeps until he gets up and repeats.”

“What? Are you telling me that he goes by himself with no guards?”

“W-well…”

“Is he out right now?”

“I don’t know…I think so?”

You throw the blanket off of yourself, moving your legs off of the bed before Beomgyu places his hands on your shoulders to prevent you from getting out. “What are you doing??”

“I’m gonna go look check on him.”

“Are you nuts?! You haven’t been discharged yet, and you’re leaving?!”

“Yes, so let me go.”

“I can’t! Agh…I knew I shouldn’t have said anything. Manager, please don’t try and go. We’re all worried as it is.”

“What?”

“Taehyun told me that we should keep it a secret from you because we want you to rest. We’re already troubled having to find Yeonjun-hyung, and we’ll just get even more worried if you push your body.”

You paid so much attention on Yeonjun that you pushed the other boys aside. The pained expression on Beomgyu’s face says it all—the situation that both you and Yeonjun are in is taking a toll on them too. They may act like it isn’t bothering them when it clearly is; they’re trying their best to do what they can.

You put your legs back under the blanket begrudgingly. “Okay…I’m sorry, Beomgyu.”

He sighs in relief, glad that Taehyun won’t have to get upset. “Is there anything I can do for you? I have to go back to the dorms after.”

“No, I’m good. You can go now. Thanks for stopping by and giving me candy. I don’t think I can last another meal with hospital food.” You laugh.

Although you’re trying to lighten the mood, Beomgyu can sense that you’re still troubled. He pretends like he didn’t notice and forces an obvious fake laugh.

“O…okay. Please text us if you need anything. I’ll be going now.”

Beomgyu leaves and closes the door. Now alone, you think about what to do. Sneaking out of the hospital isn’t going to make things better, even though you really want to. For now, you can only wait until you’re discharged from the hospital.

Or…that’s what they want you to think. Your instincts tell you that if you don’t do something right now, then you’re going to regret it.

==========

“WHAT?!”

Soobin shushes Beomgyu.

“Mi-mi-mi-missing?! What are we gonna do?! Does Taehyun and Huening Kai know about this?? A-and, Manager, she—”

“Seriously, calm down, Beomgyu! They don’t know about it. I think it’s better not to tell them until they come back. As for Manager…I don’t know.”

“We have to let her know!” Beomgyu takes his phone out. “I literally told her that he’s fine!”

“W-wait, let’s think about it first.”

“That’s what we’ve been doing! We kept thinking about it that it drove Yeonjun to go missing!!”

As the leader, Soobin is trying to remain calm, but inside, he doesn’t know what to do either. He feels awful that he kept this hidden from you. However, making you panic isn’t going to make things better either.

He thought about calling the police, but with the media already on their tails, he doesn’t want to cause more trouble and create an even bigger scene.

“I’m going to tell Manager.” Beomgyu dials your phone number.

“Beomgyu—”

“What?! Are you going to tell me to keep it on the down low again?! Sorry, Hyung, but I can’t. I don’t want to keep hiding from each other anymore. I don’t want to disappoint her again.”

Soobin is hesitant, but Beomgyu is right. “…Okay, you call her and I’ll let the younger two know,” he looks out the window, seeing as it started raining. “I just hope Hyung is safe…”

Beomgyu lets his phone ring for a while. After five rings, that’s when he knew that there’s something going on with you. Whenever it’s one of the boys who’s calling, you would pick up immediately unless there was an emergency. And since you’re not picking up your phone…

“H-Hyung…she’s not picking up. Wh-what should we do?!”

==========

You don’t know how, but you miraculously escaped the hospital. Thankfully, the members left some of your sweaters for you in case you got cold, so you were able to hide your patient uniform and leave without anybody noticing. Your hospital bed doesn’t have an alarm, so you were able to get up without having to alert the nurses.

But what you didn’t have was an umbrella. Within seconds in the rain, you’re soaked. And even though you set out in search of Yeonjun, you don’t know where to start. You left your phone in the hospital, so there’s no way you get contact him—that is if he doesn’t ignore your calls or messages.

With the day drawing towards its end, the skies grow darker with the clouds raining heavier. Less people are on the streets, only drunkards waddling back to their homes and college students coming back from restaurants.

You run around the city, passing through citizens who may look like him but to your dismay, he isn’t any of them. From head to toe, you’re drenched. Even your slippers are too wet to keep your feet dry. With each footstep, the pressure put onto the slipper squeezes some water out, only for it to soak up more.

You want to call his name, but you’re afraid that by doing so, it’ll call attention. While he may have dyed his hair blue, he is most likely hiding it to avoid being recognized. Everything is playing against you, and it makes you agonize in your lonesome worries—that you’ll probably won’t be able to find him.

It pains you to think about all this might’ve been avoidable. Maybe if you didn’t push aside his problems, then this wouldn’t have happened. Of course, the attack at the red carpet was unforeseeable, but perhaps the smallest of decisions before that might’ve changed some decisions.

And looking back in the past, to trace your steps to the places you’ve been with him. It might be pointless, but it’s the best you can do. Standing at the dead center of the sidewalk, you scour through your memories, from the convenience store to the variety shows. Of all places, there was one place that stood out to you. It might’ve have very little significance at the time, but after putting everything together, it oddly makes sense. With a destination in mind, you run.

==========

At the toy store, it’s long since been closed for the day, but just as you thought, Yeonjun is there. You’re overwhelmed with an array of emotions, relieved that he’s okay but also concerned to see him just as wet as you. He’s crouching next to a trash bin next to the store like he’s inspecting something.

“Yeon…!” You stop yourself before calling his name.

But he heard you clearly. He can recognize your voice from a mile away, but he doesn’t react whatsoever. It’s only when you stand behind him when he turns around. Even though it’s the same person, his eyes have bags underneath. His hair is a mess, matted to his forehead from the rain. His nose, cheeks, and ears are red, but is skin and lips have lost color. When you trace your eyes down to his hands, he’s holding something.

You snap out of your trance, shaking your head then crouching to his level. “What are you doing here?!”

“…(Y/N)?” He mutters a small chuckle. “Ah…I’m hallucinating now. You should be in the hospital.”

Cradled in his hands is the V doll that you two saw days ago. It’s out of its box now, but it has black dirt all over its clothes and face. It has lost some of its plastic hair, revealing a few bald spots with holes.

“Wh-why do you have that? Come on, let’s go.”

You try helping him up, but he refuses to move. He even shoves your hands off of him.

“Hey, (Y/N). Guess what I just found out?” Yeonjun smiles, though the ends of his lips twitch. “For the past few days, I came here to make sure that someone would buy this poor doll and give it affection. I didn’t want to buy it because I wanted someone else to prove that a doll like this can be loved. Every, single, day, people would pass by this doll and aren’t willing to end its loneliness. And you know what? Just a few hours ago, the owner of the store was clearing out his clearance toys and threw them out, and this doll was one of them.”

He’s talking like a mad man. But his grin slowly twists into a sour expression as he bites his bottom lip.

“It fell out of its box and got dirty. It became nothing more than another piece of trash. And it made me open my eyes: the reason why this doll can’t be loved is because it’s just an imitation of the real V-sunbaenim! There are millions of V copycats, just like this doll, and none of them will ever match his level of superiority. People fall in love with the real V-sunbaenim, not this, so it’s obvious that they want the real one,” he squeezes the doll so tight that the limbs begin to misshapen. “The fake one is just temporary. The fakes are always the ones who are left behind…”

That’s when it hits you; Yeonjun isn’t talking about the millions of factory-made dolls of Taehyung, or any of the other BTS members in that regards.

But himself.

“Ever since our debut, I kept having demented thoughts…I supported my seniors, but deep down…I wanted them to fail. I wanted them see them crash and burn because…the more successful they became, the more pressure that came upon us. And I hate myself for being selfish! But…I’m more scared of disappointing the people…our fans…that I can’t live up to their expectations.”

You’re so shocked that you can’t say anything. All this bottled up emotions has been eating him up, and it’s scaring you.

“If we tried our best, we got hated because they think we’re trying to top our seniors, but if we didn’t live up to their expectations, then we were accused of being privileged and lazy.”

His eyes are turning swollen, and he can’t stop crying. He covers his eyes the palm of his hands, wailing in pain.

“I didn’t become a performer only to continue someone else’s dreams! (Y/N)…I can’t take it anymore…”

No, he’s doing it again.

“I can’t…”

Don’t say it.

“I want to give up—”

“YEONJUN!” You shout from the top of your lungs.

You grab his cheeks, shaking him violently. His face is so icy—so cold that it could give you frostbites. While he’s sitting, you’re standing on your knees, hovering over him small body.

“Get those thoughts out of your head! Don’t ever say that you want to give up! You will make your own mark!! You’re going to go on stage and prove to yourself that you’re not Taehyung from BTS, but Yeonjun from Tomorrow by Together. And…and…”

You can’t hold back your tears either, letting all your emotions out as well.

“I’ll be there…supporting you…Soobin, Beomgyu, Taehyun, and Huening Kai. Because we’re a team, and we help each other out.”

You pull him in for a hug, and his head is nuzzled on your shoulder. When he tries to fight you off of him, you don’t let go.

“They may compare you to Taehyung, and they can hate you for all we care. But you’ll never be Taehyung.”

You pull him back, smiling.

“And he can never be you, either. Just like how there’s only one Kim Taehyung from BTS, there’s only one Choi Yeonjun from TXT, and that’s you.”

His eyes widen, then within seconds, he bursts into tears. He hides his face in your chest, sobbing like a child. He drops the doll to hold onto you. Despite you shivering too, your body gives so much warmth, and he doesn’t want to let go.

Having to grow up into the cruelty known as the entertainment world where the agencies and audience has the right to control their lives, Yeonjun could never cry in pain. His fears hold him back from ever revealing his vulnerable side because he’s the ‘number one trainee of Big Hit’. A title so high like that, he had to pretend to be a man who can stand tall. But…as time went by, it broke him bit by bit. He was constantly compared and belittled, and it hurt him more than anyone could ever imagine.

“(Y/N)…I don’t want to let go. I’m scared…I’m scared of the world, myself, everything.”

“It’s okay…don’t worry.”

“I don’t hate my seniors…I don’t hate our fans…I just hate…how the world works.”

“Don’t beat yourself up anymore. You don’t have to be so hard on yourself. You deserve to eat whatever you want, dress however you want, and be the person you want to be. They can judge you, but they can’t define you. Now, let’s go back home.”

==========

Many hours later back in the dorms, the four members are standing by the bedroom door. They want to check, but they don’t want to disrupt you and Yeonjun. You two have been in there for hours. But even with the warnings of the other members, Beomgyu is antsy.

“Why can’t I just look?”

“No! They’re probably tired and just want to be left alone.” Soobin steps in between Beomgyu and the door.

Beomgyu groans. “Those two have been doing crazy things, and I can’t take a break.”

“Lower your voice. They’re most likely sleeping.” Taehyun shushes.

“…Okay…” he sighs. “But just a peek.”

Beomgyu steps around Soobin and tries to open the door.

“No!” Huening Kai pulls him away. “It’s forbidden to intervene in such an intimate moment.”

“…You calling it ‘intimate’ is just making me even more nervous! What if Yeonjun-hyung is, you know, doing things to her?!”

“They both came back to the dorms drenched in rain, potentially sick from being exposed to germs, and that’s what you’re worried about?” Taehyun raises an eyebrow.

“Manager has been in the bedroom for a long time…” Soobin plays with his fingers. “Who would’ve ever thought that they had an awkward relationship from the beginning?”

“Eh? They did?” Beomgyu asks, oblivious.

“Of course. They wanted nothing to do with each other. I don’t know when, but they became friends out of nowhere.”

“It’s even weirder that Yeonjun-hyung didn’t like her at first, but look at him now,” Taehyun crosses his arms. “He’s completely infatuated with her.”

Beomgyu stares at the boys, wide-eyed. “…WHAT?! Ye-Ye-Yeonjun-hyung l-l-likes Manager?! Since when?!”

“You couldn’t tell?” Huening Kai laughs. “He makes it very obvious. There are times when he becomes a vicious wolf when we hog her too much…”

“Manager probably likes him too.” Taehyun adds.

“What…?” Beomgyu looks baffled and disappointed, like he just lost a battle.

“I wouldn’t be surprised…” Kai drags his sentence. “Yeonjun-hyung does have that air of maturity. She probably wants someone like him.”

“…I’m an adult too.” Soobin mutters under his breath.

“I do hope that Yeonjun-hyung does realize that not everybody hates us,” Taehyun turns on his phone, sliding through pages of articles. “We have fans who care about us too. V-sunbaenim also sent us a message in the group chat, asking if we’re okay. He said that he’s even willing to cancel their activity in the U.S. just to visit us…”

“All of our seniors are worried about us. They do treat us too good.” Huening Kai chuckles nervously.

“Oh, I know!” Soobin jumps excitedly. “Before he wakes up, let’s compile all the supportive comments that we’ve received during our hiatus, including some from BTS-sunbaenim.”

“He’s going to cry for sure. There’s so much support from our fans that we can’t count. But…every voice matters, and I kind of want to do that.” Taehyun blushes slightly.

“Yea, yea, let’s do it!!!!” Soobin grabs ahold of Huening Kai and swings him back and forth.

“Gah! Hyung, let me go!!”

==========

Even though the boys are trying to leave you and Yeonjun alone to rest, they’re doing a poor job at it. You’ve been trying to fall asleep, but with their loud voices, it’s nearly impossible. However, you can’t help but find it endearing, disliking them is even more impossible.

You’ve been sitting by Yeonjun’s bed, having changed out of your patient uniform and into clothes that Soobin rushed to buy just for you. Yeonjun has been sleeping since he was showing signs of a fever. The entire time, he wouldn’t let go of your hand, and you’ve been holding it since.

When you look at him, Yeonjun has been awake for a while, but you don’t know when he woke up. He’s on his phone, scrolling through his feed.

“Oh, you’re not sleeping?”

He shakes his head. “How am I supposed to sleep with all the ruckus?”

You snicker. “True. I’m sure they’re just worried.”

“Yea, and I feel bad.”

“Hey, no need to feel bad,” You hold onto his hand tighter.

He gazes at you with gentle eyes, brushing your hair behind your ears. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m better than ever.”

“No fever?”

Yeonjun presses his knuckles against your forehead. As he leans a little closer, it makes you timid with how intense his stare is. It’s too much that you had to pull yourself away.

“How are you feeling?” You avert your eyes, scratching your forehead.

“Well…I’m dying.”

“What?! Wh-what should I do? Ah…we have to go to the hospital. Where’s my phone???”

“I’m dying of embarrassment. I can’t believe I broke down in front of you again.”

You’re still before it finally hits you that it was somewhat of a joke. “Jesus Christ, Yeonjun! You scared me!”

“Seriously! My pride’s been ruined, and now I don’t think I can ever recover. I vowed that I would never appear weak in front of you again.”

You chuckle. “What’s wrong with that? We’re all human.”

“Yea but…it makes it seem needy. I want to be able to take care of you too.”

“You’ve done enough for me too.”

“Going to the store with you doesn’t count.”

“It counts to me!”

“No,” he sets his phone down, cupping your cheek so you can look at him.

With that brief eye contact, it’s already enough to make you all worked up. Your heartbeat becomes rapid, and your anxiousness has risen. You try to turn away, but he doesn’t allow you to do so, turning your head back to him.

“I’m going to prove that I’m not who the media thinks I am, some innocent boy. Don’t forget that I’m twenty-one. There are things that I crave too, you know?”

“L-like what?”

Take smirks. “Take a guess.”

He brings his face closer to yours. You flinch, but you don’t fight it. Your face turns as red as a tomato, so embarrassed that you can’t look at him in the face. He loves seeing you flustered because, for once, it seems like you’re able to see him as a man, not a child.

“Yeonjun…the boys are in the living room. We…we shouldn’t…”

“Let them catch us.”

“Wh-what??”

“If you’re so worried about them, then I’ll stop.”

But you’re hesitant, clearly expressing that you don’t want to turn him down. It makes Yeonjun smirk.

“They already know that I called dibs on you a long time ago.”

“L-long time ago?!” You give him a surprised look. “Since when—”

And without warning, Yeonjun presses his lips against yours. His eyes are closed, the soft sensation of his lips create fireworks in your chest. There’s no gap in between, your face brushed against his, and while he’s breathing steadily, you hold your breath.

He pulls back slowly, almost wanting to go again but stopping before he can’t control himself. Your entire face has burned up so much that he could’ve sworn he saw steam coming out of your ears. He laughs, finding you absolutely adorable.

“I’ll give my everything to the media, our real fans, and especially you, what I’m made of. I can promise you that.”

It’s been so long since you last saw confidence in his eyes. In fact, you don’t ever recall seeing him as confident as this. He always pulled through challenges with a wink of doubt, never none. As flustered as you are with this sudden kiss, you’re nevertheless happy that he’s found his footing again.

“(Y/N), and I’ll make sure that everybody knows that I like—”

“MANAGER! I’M GOING TO SAVE YOU!!”

Beomgyu’s abrupt shouting startles both you and Yeonjun as he tries to unlock the door. You two can hear Soobin and Huening Kai struggle to get him off the door as the knob twists side to side.

“Is he hurting you!? He is, isn’t he?! I always knew Hyung was a fox in sheep’s clothing!!”

“It’s wolf, not fox!!” Soobin corrects him.

You and Yeonjun look at each other with confused looks, but then it turns into sweet laughter.

You don’t know what the future holds for you and the five boys. This isn’t going to be the last time people will send hate toward them. It hasn’t been long since their debut, so they have a long way before they can show how strong they are. Regardless, each obstacle is a test for them to fight back against those who try to pull them down.

The future may be foggy, but there’s a purpose with why you became their manager. You and the boys have come together with the same dream of touching the hearts of many, reaching for a better tomorrow. They may have their ups and downs, but it’s these flaws that they’ll learn to grow and become a better and more confident version of themselves. They don’t know when the day will come, but for now, they’ll enjoy their journey.

[End]

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