Underfalter

18+ adult/twenties. same name on ao3. Do not follow/interact if under 18. thanks for reading!

[underfalter]

Here are a bunch of fanfictions for Artemis/ButIer that I have bookmarked over the years from ffnet!

The Bullet — SFW, fanfiction.net

Artemis dreams that the events in En Fin with Spiro went differently. Despite himself, he seeks out the comfort of ButIer, desperate to prove to himself his bodyguard is still there. 

Quiet — SFW, fanfiction.net

(Post-TLG, spoilers, sad fic, Artemis/ButIer) It hadn't been long since Artemis had been back. And already he's making Domovoi sick with worry.

After me, the flood — SFW, fanfiction.net

With his mother's mental health deteriorating and his father growing increasingly distant, Artemis crosses the final hurdles into adulthood. Artemis's understanding of responsibility and family are further strained when he develops feelings for his bodyguard.

Indecorous affairs — NSFW, fanfiction.net

"Your bodyguard?" A stupid question, but Artemis turns anyway, and when he speaks, he purrs, "No…" sarcastic—but not quite so sarcastic, ButIer thinks, as he might have been. "He's my gigolo." Ten Drabbles.

Inelectable — NSFW, fanfiction.net

TwoShot. The whispered words “Sleep with me,” were an order, an offer, and a request all rolled into one, and ButIer supposed it should have taken more than one kiss, three words, and a gentle tug towards the bedroom—but it didn’t. ButIer/Artemis

Rational intercourse— NSFW, fanfiction.net

A story in which Artemis learns there is nothing rational about intercourse. PWP. ButIer/Artemis.

Finding Terra firma — NSFW, fanfiction.net

Unfortunately for ButIer, if there's anything more complicated than going to bed with Artemis Fowl…it's waking up with him. DB/AF; Sequel to "Rational Intercourse"

L'Homme Fatale — NSFWish, fanfiction.net

Holly sees something she thinks she shouldn’t have, but things aren’t what they seem. Later, ButIer and HolIy discuss what it means to love Artemis FowI. ButIer/Artemis, One-Sided HolIy/Artemis

[underfalter]

Small update because I have so much love for many mutuals/friends on here and this past month I’ve been online very very sporadically: health scare of parent required briefly moving back to help with care and that brought up some very difficult feelings due to our rather complicated history. Trying to claw back a normal routine and communicating with friends after having only had work and figuring out next steps with [redacted] being immunocompromised

[underfalter]

Guys I have aging parents and this last week was health scare hell 😞

[abookonthetrain]

[theunlitpath]

okay??

[subaru-copilot]

trying to write a fic but i get frustrated bc i dont write like a 50+ years of experience in writing nobel in literature winner writer

[relicsofadeletedworld]

deviantart, circa 2001

[virtualgirladvance]

[underfalter]

Terrible fanfiction idea: Artemis gets A Christmas Carol-ed

One could argue that functionally Artemis was A Christmas Carol-ed in B1 (which does take place around Christmas, if I remember correctly) LMAO. Delighted by this idea (and I would argue as well for the Spiro equivalent of this for TEC, in an AU where Spiro is capable of "learning" "lessons")

[firstfullmoon]

aria aber, “my father drives me to düsseldorf airport” / hedgie choi, “salvage”

[johannestevans]

Burgeoning masochist sweating and dry-mouthed as he watches his school friend delicately mounting his recent etymological specimens on velvet with pins, explaining where is best to pierce each specimen to keep it secure

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

I love how you reblog really interesting posts about history and culture immediately followed by someone horny posting on main. It makes my dash a truely beautiful experience

the horny is an inextricable part of history and culture and I am dead serious about that

[underfalter]

Posting with wild abandon because I have the flu… I remember owning a copy of TTP in middle school, and it was unfortunately formative to young me to read that scene where — for magic reasons obv — Artemis has to more or less strip nude in front of his friends to be sent back in time. It was like woah. My favorite character is embarrassed. and is being teased. and is blushy. Let me bookmark this passage for lore. purposes.

[underfalter]

If anything this scene just emphasizes that Artemis needs to be forced to participate in more conversations while having only skimpy panties to protect his modesty

[underfalter]

Artemis - at various points in the series - proves to be Bothersome when taken captive. Surely some of the fight could have been drained from him in properly welcoming Artemis to his new household by forcibly piercing him to mark him as under new ownership :)

[underfalter]

Butler and FowI Sr are tied when it comes to sheer number of mentions within the extensive notes Artemis’ school therapists take down in their Fraught sessions with him

[underfalter]

Actually. Going back to Dr. Po mentioning his concerns about Butler in TAI… unclear whether this is borne of Butler having been recently banned from campus for being too much of a helicopter parent (trying to live in Artemis’ dorm) or whether Artemis is bringing Butler up in Some Capacity during therapy sessions

[underfalter]

@butterscotchbunny335 I feel like Artemis talking about Butler is similar to the bit in Always Sunny re: apple peels.

[efka-zoi-blog]

“Artemis’s attempts to reject puberty build humor into the novels […] but they also establish puberty as an oppressive force that Artemis seeks to conquer. Adolescence is characterized as more like Artemis’s nemesis Opal Koboi than as a fairly unremarkable transitional period for virtually all biological life forms. (133) […] Butler sees puberty as a natural phase of human psychosexual and somatic development, but Artemis questions its necessity, expressing his wish to be spared its hormonal vicissitudes and, by so doing, to remain eternally a prepubescent and sexually innocent child. Although Artemis’s words cannot be taken seriously as an indication of his ability to rewrite the rules of biology, they nonetheless underscore his single-minded efforts to remain always a child and to live as forever presexual. (133-4) […] Readers see characters embracing, confused by, resistant to, and otherwise befuddled and intrigued by sexual possibilities, making the Artemis Fowl novels, a Fairy wonderland of imagination and fantasy, strangely utopian in its topsy-turvy treatment of the travails of love, queer eroticism, and gross adolescence for its human readers. (139)”

—

Pugh, Tison. “Excremental Eroticism, Carnivalesque Desires, and Gross Adolescence in Eoin Colfer’s Artemis Fowl." Innocence, Heterosexuality, and the Queerness of Children’s Literature. NY: Routledge, 2011. 119-39.

-

I found this interesting essay about psychosexual development in the Artemis Fowl series (please read the whole thing for the critic’s full arguments). I was initially put off by its adherence to Freudian psychoanalysis but I actually found myself agreeing with a number of his points - the grossness of puberty, the author’s reading of No1, the role of the carnivalesque - although I disagree strongly with the perceived relationship between homosexuality and anality. I’m with the author to the point of identifying Mulch & flatulence as a celebration of the carnivalesque, but I dislike the elision the author (and Freudian analysis in general) makes into male homosexuality.

I also firmly disagree with the assertion that Artemis Fowl emerges from the books as a heterosexual teen, a sentiment I’ve seen repeated on fansites. This critic, like many fans, fails to distinguish between sexual attraction and any other form of attraction. Artemis’s attraction to Minerva, Holly, and Maria is never rendered as sexual. It is inexplicit, vague, hormonal but not erotic, and he remains in a state of arrested sexual development for the entirety of the series. Speaking personally, I felt non-sexual heteroromantic attraction at Artemis’s age in much the same way he does, but those feelings never progressed into sexual attraction and as an adult I identify as primarily homosexual. I find it interesting that the author (who wrote this essay before the release of the final books) predicts Artemis will end the series in a heterosexual relationship, which he doesn’t. The series’ rejection of heterosexual closure is one of the reasons I, as a queer adult, continue to return to it and create queer fan content for it. Similarly, Artemis’s aversion to ‘the vicissitudes of adolescence,’ as the author aptly puts it, is also something with which I identify strongly and a point in this essay I am generally in agreement with.

I’d recommend this essay, despite my issues with it, if you’re interested in queerness and/or psychoanalysis in relation to the Artemis Fowl series.

[efka-zoi-blog]

I had a really useless epiphany the other night. They talk about teeth in EC a lot? Like the waitress's smile shrunk by a couple molars and the sonic bomb blew out all the assassins' teeth and spiros were stained and blunt had his weird dentures and Carla had a ruby in her incisor. I don't think there's a point and there's nothing to do with the information but it's weird and I thought maybe someone else would think so too

After thinking on this for a while, here are my jumbled thoughts, mostly addressing dental violence. I’ll put this under a cut as it’s a teeny tad graphic.

Keep reading

[efka-zoi-blog]

But would either of them remember blunt? Who is presumably a shaken mess too busy serving time for everything he confessed. Spiro might figure out Artemis doesn't really remember their interactions. It might make for an interesting turning point, where Artemis has had enough of spiro's awful 'parenting' tactics and is about to contact butler to get him and spiro realizes if he wants Artemis to stay he may have to yield a bit and actually try to connect

It might help for plot purposes if Artemis sr. plays a role in butlers hindrance. Artemis decides to take the offer, expecting butler to be able to accompany him, when in a fit of rage sr. informs him that butler technically works for him and would until his contract is up. He makes sure butler has no legal ability get to Artemis in America and uses old underworld contacts to prevent him getting there illegally. It could be a at in contrast of father figures reacting. ½

2/2 Artemis Sr. reverts and essentially throws a tantrum overs Artemis rejecting him. Spiro grows from Artemis rejecting him and threatening to leave. And butler is butler, remaining an unconditional source of support, although via electronic means until he can find a way to work around Artemis Sr.’s efforts (which may come from help from the People)

It might also work if Artemis in his new state with lingering a of his pre-mindwipe self if afraid to meet his Sr.’s expectation or is afraid that he would hurt him since he’s supposedly so gentle now

Checking The Eternity Code, it mentions any days spent in fairy company will be entirely erased. So presumably Artemis would have no knowledge of the heist correction: meeting with Spiro at all, but would remember planning and organising it - right up until the night before he was due to meet Spiro, at which point there would be a huge gap. And a large chunk of change in his bank account with mysterious origins (taken from Spiro’s accounts).

So if Artemis got a call from Spiro, who would not know that Artemis had no memory of the heist itself, he would probably quickly ascertain that Spiro had memories of events that he lacked. And yep, you’re right, Artemis would have no memory of Blunt at all, or Butler getting shot, etc.

I can see Artemis Sr trying to play that card, but I’m sure Butler would have ways of getting around such restrictions, legal or otherwise, and I don’t think Artemis Sr would be able to keep any meaningful rein on Butler. I’m fond of the headcanon that Artemis Sr is actually quite bad at interacting with other criminals (as the only major instance we know of him doing so ended in disaster) and is all bark, no bite. But he could make the threat and Artemis could insist Butler stay behind to avoid creating a mess of legal inconvenience for him, then travel to Chicago alone to spite his father (knowing that if any harm came to him he would at least never have to deal with his father trying to separate him from Butler again).

I personally prefer Spiro to remain emotionally static. While Artemis changes and grows (for better or worse), he remains in this psychopathic arrested development. He’ll try different manipulative tactics and will to some extent learn from past mistakes, but not really emotionally change (and never change suit styles or redecorate his apartment or buy a CD released after 1989…). And I prefer Butler to remain exiled from these proceedings as it creates a more unhealthy developmental space for Artemis to be cut off from those sources of support. But those are just my personal preferences.