Corvid 🫀
♬♪ Just know that if you hide
It doesn't go away
× Not A Human ×
• it / its
• adult
• crow in the therian way
• doll & angel in the empty spaces way
-> bipolar, PTSD
-> cult & child abuse survivor
taylor price
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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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Janaina Medeiros
h
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@undying-doll
Corvid 🫀
♬♪ Just know that if you hide
It doesn't go away
× Not A Human ×
• it / its
• adult
• crow in the therian way
• doll & angel in the empty spaces way
-> bipolar, PTSD
-> cult & child abuse survivor
what many people don't realize is that dolls' signature Stillness is actually a stress response! dolls need to have things to do, much like humans. the difference is that humans have the agency to create new things to do, while dolls immediately resort to dormancy.
doll tattoos?
doll tattoos
doll tattoos :)
Oh, wow, this is getting a lot of attention. Y'all really like our joints huh? I want to say, thank you, this is the effort of about two years, tattooing, healing, touching up, healing, tattooing again, to turn our body into our home and it really touches us to see them so well received. And we're not even done yet! We still want to get our ankles and shoulders done, at least. On that note - with all of the tags - You need to exist within your own bodies, and I'm honored if this makes you wonder about how you want to do that. Good luck, and I hope you find comfort as we have.
I am in awe! You look so comfortable and happy
Once a mech pilot hits 20 they age out of the system and the military just drops 'em off and gives them the number of a cheap therapist. If you know where to look, or got a buddy who they send 'em to, you can pick one up real easy and they make for impeccable sex toys. Growth was limited by cockpit size and the massive amount of calories burned by the biolink so you can just pick 'em up and toss 'em around however you like. Real used to pain, too. Best part is, they really know how to depersonalize a kid, they all answer to "it" and just do whatever you tell 'em. Never complain, never ask for anything, just sit there shaking and flinching at loud noise. Oh, and when they die, they're so full of chemicals they can last a few days before you wanna throw 'em out.
this is super hot, but honestly, it gets me thinking. there’d probably be small organisations and community groups that spring up to prevent these retired mech pilots from being abused and help them reintegrate into society.
cus yeah, you would be extremely vulnerable to things like abusive relationships and drug abuse sex trafficking and homelessness and financial scams. you’ve been completely deprived of social skills, support networks, and adult skills. and of course had your brain absolutely zapped.
once you get bussed back into the city, you don’t get dumped not at some vacant street corner like they used to, but at the doorsteps of a dusty little building, and welcomed inside. you’ll be boarding here for the next few days, but it’s not some trap to swindle you. it’s just a temporary place to stay while they find you a nice apartment.
you see, mech pilots get a pretty amazing government pension. but you’ve never used a credit card before and most of your old identifying documents are classified. pilots usually need some help with accessing it and getting themselves off the ground.
but all of that stuff is pretty overwhelming to a fresh-off-the-presses living weapon. the real boon of this place is the community meetups. lots of other pilots, new and old, come here to socialise and support and supervise and mentor. it’s almost a bustling hub of jumpy little miscreants. there’s a lot of focus on drug safety here, overdose is the leading cause of mech pilot death.
you sit through it, mostly zoning in and out - you just sorta wandered in here cus navigating a building that isn’t base is still a bit alien. but afterwards at the snack table a few other pilots come up to you and introduce themselves. the way your voice quivers and your hands shake makes it obvious to them you’re newly retired. how come you haven’t been given a guardian? yeah this place blows, super underfunded, they chuckle to themselves. don’t worry, we’ll take you under our wing.
so you hang out with this group for the rest of the day, mostly just following them from activity room to activity room. but they’re nice. they pull back your attention when you get caught staring at a screen, and they calm you down with gentle touches when your hands start shaking too much to use them. you’re pretty quite, but it’s nice to watch people talk and laugh. it’s a new experience, mundane carefree conversations.
as sunset ends they suggest we go out for a bite to eat. and as the most recent command, you oblige. you can only order a kids meal, lest you throw it all back up, but it’s delicious. you try to thank them like a rookie thanking superior for new instructions, but they just laugh and ruffle your hair.
hey! one of them says. you know what this kid needs ? to smoke some fucking pot. you don’t really know what that means but soon you’re back at one of their places, just hanging out on their couches. it’s real chill, no one’s forcing you to smoke, letting you choose. it’s tricky but eventually you make a decision, everyone else is doing it after all.
it’s really nice, your hands nearly completely stop shaking and your mind isn’t so … spikey. you don’t really talk, just laying there while some inane show plays on the tv and the others laugh and giggle and talk.
eventually you fall asleep, snuggling w another one of the pilots. it’s not lewd or anything, it’s just comfy. to have that soft physical touch with someone and know that nothing bad will happen because of it.
while you sleep, two of the older pilots talk out on the balcony, sharing a smoke.
poor kid, they really did a number on her.
she’s really damaged, she’s got nerve damage for sure.
yeah.
she’ll need a lot if help learning how to be human.
don’t we all?
you know what i mean, she can’t even go in public alone yet. gonna need a lot of reinforcement to learn she’s her own self with wants and needs and value.
heh.
what?
you like her.
she’s a good kid is all i’m saying - i want her to be happy. she deserves to carve out a space for herself in this world - her own place
you say that for all of them.
and yes, this is about transitioning and the importance of finding a community of other trans girls. how scary and new it can all be, how easily people can exploit that and hurt you. how muchthe community benefits by collectively uplifting each other instead of letting everyone fend for themselves in a society that doesn’t even think about you - at best
if i were to keep writing the next part would be the gang going shopping together, so the new retiree would have something that isn’t their old plain military clothes. giving you the space to choose something that you want to wear, the opinions and needs of others be damned. i don’t think that needs to be explained
im gonna level i mostly wrote this thinking about how hot a limp military fucktoy would be but this is some real shit
i think it's hottest if all of these checks and balances exist to stop people taking advantage of mech pilots exist, and they still get whisked away because theyre so braindead that it's basically trivial to lure one down an alley with just a stern voice. even with supportive communities and daily meetings nearly 90% of pilots disappear less than a year after retirement. maybe if they weren't the perfect god-given fleshlight they wouldn't get kidnapped so often
I love how tumblr users agree with things by adding the most beautiful worldbuilding on top of horny shit posts
help
submissive in the way a livestock guardian dog is submissive to the sheep it kills wolves for
love how much attention this post is getting i knew the gay people in my phone would understand me. btw here's the picture that inspired me to make this post in the first place:
people who can’t handle mildly weird people are so annoying. “omg this person thinks they’re married to a fictional character???!! wtf???!!!” all my mutuals are delusional nonhuman furries and gods and angels and shit who wanna fuck laptops or the concept of space. and I bring them GIFTS for their weddings with their fictional spouses. get on my level
genuine question does any writing in empty spaces/dollposting actually focus on the interiority of the primary witches rather than just the dolls
nearly everything i see of the setting, time after time, is written exclusively from the dolls' perspective; even things written by those who would fill the role of Witch doesn't stray from this, as far as i've seen
this wouldn't be surprising in, say, HDG where the dom-figures are intentionally unknowable alien entities that are, from a doylist perspective, functionally plot devices for horny purposes
but in dollposting where it's theoretically a brainweird hornyqueer space about exploring angst and tenderness and relationship to a lack of humanity it's kind of weird how the 'Witches' who fill the role of the dom-equivalent tend to be assigned to only existing with relation to the Dolls they have
am i wrong with my analysis here? do we simply not follow the Correct:tm: dollposters? a lot of our system identifies quite closely with the aesthetics of the witch-archetype as is depicted by the empty spaces ouvre and it's a shame that as far as we can tell that's not explored as much as we'd like
what does it mean to willingly shoulder the burden of holding control and sway? how do these entities live, being both less than and more than human, distorted from whatever former selves they once were? how does that doll's mistress feel, in the quiet moments, when she is alone? truly alone, not just 'needing to be cheered up by her dolls'.
[Luna] I think this is indeed partly a result of the writing space being sub-centric, but also partly a result of foundational works placing witches in the role of abusers so frequently.
The witch-as-abuser lent itself to unknowable, inscrutable characters who could be all-knowing and whose whims could change on a dime with little apparent logic - hot one moment, cold the next, sweet, then cruel...
A glimpse into the interiority of the abuser defuses their power.
Certainly this is less applicable to the nowadays more popular fluff-fiction that tends to dominate the space, but I do think that the earlier works contributed to the image of the witch as opaque.
(My own private writing is often quite open about my interiority, because I enjoy playing the girl consumed by jealousy, a need for control, and gnawing loneliness; someone who hurts and controls others to try and build a sense of security and safety for herself.)
the moth was not enough to satisfy my desire to glue lace onto dolls, so here's my next endeavor.
i've been wanting to sculpt more mushrooms for a long time, but there was always something else demanding attention. seeing a lot of shrooms outside finally inspired me to make this ink cap, and start a couple of others that might eventually see the light of day. printing the cap without breaking the ink droplets is basically impossible, but at the moment i'm paying less attention to my designs being reprintable and more on having fun. as i told my partner, "can't wait to get the head out of the printer so i can BREAK IT."
instagram | prints
Generational toxic masculinity.
Wouldn't it be nice to just be a doll? Unthinking and empty... eyes staring off into nothing, smiling mindlessly.
Free from your worldly stresses. Dolls don't need those.
And you're just a doll, aren't you? A doll controlled solely by my strings. No need to think.
You just need to sink.~ 💕🌀
What once was lost
from A Well-Trained Wife: My Escape from Christian Patriarchy by Tia Levings (2024)
Pat said reactivity was a trauma response.
I was familiar with fight or flight. But less familiar with freeze and fawn. She explained fawning as supercharged people-pleasing. It’s engaging in behaviors (often self-betraying behaviors) in an attempt to appease and pacify a traumatic threat.
Fawning placed everyone else’s needs over my own, which also, perhaps conveniently, modeled Christian behavior. […]
People preferred to be fawned over more than they liked to hear a woman in fight response, but both responses were my reaction to feeling triggered. Fawning was my attempt to pacify a perceived threat and my relationships were entangled by it.
It seemed like I could sum up my entire childhood as fawning. I felt groomed to fawn. It was in the tone of voice we were taught to use, our smiles and crossed legs, our servant hearts.
an angel will keep pushing itself far beyond its limits and screaming that it's all over and it's going to kill itself right fucking now, then persevere by the tiniest margin to do it again the next day
a doll will always endure the worst, smile and say "Everything is just fine, Miss!" then finally when it's no longer needed, it will disappear into the shadows silently and with demure poise. later on, as you're walking past the clocktower, you'll see a heap of porcelain shards and mangled gears strewn over the cobblestone
the witch is the reason why both are doing it
Shadow: Fallen Angel
In the neon glow of the city streets, shadows dance like flames. Stretching and contracting; looming large then disappearing beneath the caster. No one thinks much of them the majority of the time. Though, sometimes, one might catch an unusual movement from the corner of their eye. A darkness that seems to dart with preternatural quickness from one pool of black to another. Most write it off as a trick of the light, or of the mind. Usually, theyre right, but sometimes something resides in the darkness.
A lone angel darts into an amber lit alleyway; panting and trying to catch her breath. Leaning forward with her hands on her knees, she lets out a deep sigh and closes her eyes. The many eyes on the side walk, she swears, were fixed on her halo. Overwhelmed at this much perceived attention, she had begun to panic. A moment, she thought to herself, just need a moment. Having finally calmed her nerves, she straightens up, shaking the remaining jitters off.
"Okay. Im good. Its okay. Im fine" she says out loud, attempting to reassure herself.
With one last deep breath, she attempts to take a step, but finds her legs wont obey. Her shadow, unbeknownst to her, appears to be wreathed in void-like flames. It straightens, standing tall with its arms at its sides and legs together. To her horror, she does the same. The poor angel cant speak, cant move, cant scream.
Her shadow lifts both arms, gripping her halo. Muffled protests vibrate deep in her throat and chest, unable to fight whatever force has gripped her. Her arms flex and strain as the halo bends in the shadows hands until, finally, it snaps in half with a thunderous crack. A cry of amguish reverbates through her chest, muffled by her still sealed lips. Tears begin streaming from her pained eyes.
In a swift, unnaturally forcful motion, the cracked and jagged ends of the broken halo are thrust through her forehead unceremoniously.
Pain. Agony. Cries cut short in her throat as blood streams down her face. Whatever forse puppeting her not allowing her blissful unconciousness. She stands, once again, bolt straight with her arms at her sides. The twin streams of tears and blood flooding her face as they merge. Some passing the corners of her mouth, leaving her with the taste of salty iron.
The crescents of the halo burn beneath her skin, charring and becoming twisted black horns. The angels' muffled wails of pain intensifying as abysal flames spark and engulf her. All the while stuck frozen and unmoving. Her skin wriths and twists across her body, dying a deep crimson. New scars appearing on her skin, one for each sacrifice she'd ever made. Marking her now devilish form forever as a reminder. Her pristine white wings quickly turned to ash, but retained a wing-like shape. Her shadow forcing them to spread, eliciting another agonized muffled scream from her chest. Her nails become talons and she could now feel sharp fangs pressing against the back of her lips.
The transformation complete, her eyes are the only thing that remained of her previous form.
The shadowy flames died, seemingly leaking into the surrounding darkness. As if cut from invisible strings, the angel collapses to the ground. Finally free to scream, pained otherworldly wails poured from her lungs until her voice turned hoarse. Curling up in a ball, she wraps herself in her wings of ash, sobbing and rocking.
Endlessly drifting through a harsh mindscape, i find myself warped by stray thoughts. Im an idea, a figment. A concept givin form, though none of them are my own. Asigned my role, i will play it and dance gracelessly to the music. My strings tangling together; making me more of a jester. Your clown. Your personal joke. You laugh as i stumble and fall, strings cut. Tears wanting to form, but they wont come. You want me to smile. Hold that vapid, brainless expression. Eyes vacant. Bright red lips curled into a beaming grin as i stare out from my heap of limbs.
I am your toy. Your villain. Your hero. Your victim. Despite my best efforts, i cannot escape. When i run, you take my legs, leaving me to crawl on my belly. When i raise my fist, you make them large, useless, paws. When i scream, you steal my voice and i mew or bark. I cant tell you how much i hate you because you change my words. Turning them from anger and derission to loving poems about your majesty. Gushing about how wonderful you are.
I swear i was human once, but you dont allow me that memory. I swear i had my own name, but you change it every hour and ive lost track. I cant remember who or what i was. At some point, i became your imaginary friend and i hate that you made me love it.