perched in the dark.

tellin' all the rich folk anything they wanna hear i could be the way forward only if they pay for it

[kvothes]

richard siken

[planetsorbit]

charlie's hand slows to a stop, an uncharacteristically shy expression now set on flushed skin. he has the decency to be embarrassed when julius asks for an end, but his fingers don't retract from their vice grip. he merely lingers, holds on like he's been caught with his forearm in the cookie jar. " - would you want to? - get hard again, i mean." and just so it's exceptionally clear, charlie admits: "i like how this looks on you, is all. you're - you're warm, and you sound really..." greedily, he surprises julius with another gentle tug, following this with an appreciative kiss at the sharp angle of julius' jaw. charlie swallows, audibly - murmuring affections against the shell of his ear, "you sound cute. and wrecked."

[untamedcowboy]

he'd uttered the words, but without any meaning behind them. a warning more than a request, the same way he warned charlie not to bite off more than he could chew. julius moans again, involuntary, when charlie gives his cock an abrupt tug. his face flushes at the words being whispered to him, panting hard. his refractory period is really something, his cock full and erect once more as a result of all the stimulation and teasing. julius wants to empty his head, to let charlie take the control he wants. once he enters that headspace, he doesn't mind having his body treated like a toy. "don't stop. keep doing .. whatever you want to me," he instructs, so embarrassed that he glances away for a moment to ground himself. the request is broad, all-encompassing, but he means it. what better way to solidify their trust, after a stupid argument?

[planetsorbit]

charlie's reeling, excitable when julius takes to the possessiveness with ready replies. "my good, and pretty boy," he repeats, fingers holding tight when julius comes like he says - and he's gracious enough to slow to a stop, fist only dragging to encourage any last drop. there's sweat all along his temple when their breathing evens out, and when his focus returns, the blur of heat now sinking from his face, charlie teases julius with a tentative stroke. he knows the sensitivity can be unbearable; his own cock hangs spent as is - the cool air alone a strange sensation after all is done. but the affection and the wet squelching mess between julius' legs tugs at him like a lure. so charlie watches his features with intrigue, soaking up any flinch, any hitch of breath, any command to stop or slow or continue. he doesn't try pumping to the base of his cock, but he toys with the head of it, thumb pad carefully smearing at the slit in slow circles. "...too much?" charlie doesn't think himself ready for another round, and he's more than sympathetic if julius isn't either, but greed keeps his hand in place. he makes sure to offset the ache with a continuous cradling of julius' face. " - it's like you're still coming," charlie whispers, awestruck.

[untamedcowboy]

it's embarrassing to think that this started with an argument, but julius had given in so easily. he was so easily won, when it came to charlie. julius gasps, riding out the last of his orgasm but his cock is still sensitive, and charlie's hand is still teasing him. his hips kick, involuntary in his body's pursuit of more pleasure, julius letting out a lilting moan as he gazes up into charlie's face, a reassuring palm holding him in place. "ah, fuck. it hurts, but i, ah, don't hate it," he mutters, the burn of well-stretched muscles and more friction to his overstimulated cock is painful as it is pleasurable, more blood rushing south with every teasing stroke of charlie's fingers. his mouth goes slack, his hands returning to helplessly claw at the fabric of charlie's shirt. "s-stop, shit, i'll get hard again," julius warns, face pinched and breathless.

[planetsorbit]

charlie senses greed overtaking him for but a moment, when julius nods, obedient and all too willing to be cared for - to be treated well and touched. fucking the wet of his mouth isn't enough, he thinks, head and heart a little crazed in the heat of it. what follows however, is a confession to meet charlie's own - well-worn throat bobbing like a nervous crush. it's so endearing that he's half tempted to say it again. he settles for another caress, then with the affectionate palm, grasps julius by the hair, and fists his cock in his right. the shiny head of it shivers by the seam of julius' lips, and charlie strokes himself to the promise, to half-lidded lashes, to the pre-cum clinging to the cave of his mouth, to julius, hard and rutting against his leg. " - gonna come on your face," he exhales, voice hoarse like a whisper, "tongue - stick your tongue out for me?" it's a plea that arrives a little too late, as charlie takes only two, three more jerks before spilling thick ropes across julius' flustered features. his stomach swoops in the process, gasps severing in the aftershock - but it's in this momentum, that he withdraws his heel, and joins julius on one knee. charlie cradles his cheek, thumb swiping over the stains as he kisses him - spend and all - while a slicked fist shoves its way into julius' bottoms. he strokes in similar rhythm - erratic and fast and desperate, his own arousal still throbbing from the previous high. and eventually, charlie can't tell if the slick between his fingers is his own or julius'. kiss abruptly cut short, charlie watches him, almost sleepy-eyed when he grunts, "good boy - good - come, you can come like this right? - my messy and desperate boy?" (he can't explain where the words come from, just that it strikes him like a match, burns him from the inside out to say it under julius' watchful gaze.)

[untamedcowboy]

the fingers in his hair feel so nice, his psyche floating in a dream-like state full of pleasure. julius moans, brows creasing when charlie announces he's going to cum on his face and he tries to follow instruction, but he comes faster than julius anticipated. then, charlie is kissing him, ignoring the presence of his own come on the peak of julius' cheekbones, and a slick hand soon wraps around his cock. he grabs at he back of charlie's shirt, panting hard as he nods and kisses charlie again, hips jerking up helplessly. they trade a few kisses, and julius is moaning the faster charlie strokes him. "ah, ngh, fuck, it feels so good, so wet," he gasps, blown pupils gazing at charlie as his hips twitch, chest heaving, voice deep and pitchy. "yeah. yeah, your good boy," julius confirms, that heat traveling even further out other than in his sacrum, precome dripping incessantly as he feels it building, and his jaw goes slack. unavoidable. "c-coming," julius warns, spilling warm milky ropes over their hands, his cheeks flushed and breathing ragged. julius is in disbelief, still coming down from his orgasm -- incredibly sensitive.

[planetsorbit]

charlie doesn't mean to laugh, in the off chance whatever compromise they've settled on severs once again - but he can't wrestle away the smile that blooms onto his face amidst julius' threat. he can't take it seriously - the delivery only makes him unnaturally fond. he accepts their conditions anyway: "i like it." and how could he not? julius' mouth is perfect - technique even more so, and still, charlie finds himself more aroused by the sight than the contact itself. he gives and takes, works around the girth of charlie's cock like he'd intended to all along - argument and tension be damned. it simmers yet, rears its head occasionally when he catches flushed skin and white knuckles, but they overlap, crash into each other like a package deal. however controlling charlie is and however familiar their arrangement seems on the outside, the context of this exchange is stubborn and fiery. so when he wedges his ankle between julius' jerking hips - he does it almost apologetically. when both hands cradle julius' working jaw, and his right thumb slips into the corner, stretching him ever wider - he means it with affection. more importantly, he tries to say as much. "i like you, okay? - i like it when you're here, i like what we have, i like -" and the corner of his mouth lifts into a grin - the strangely romantic exchange paired up with his cock nested into julius' mouth - amusing and suitable. he's feverish in the wanting, tracing hot arousal onto the flat of julius' tongue when he murmurs, "i like teasing you, that's all i was doing. and then - and then we - then this happened." charlie combs the hair from julius' forehead, ankle jerking upward until the heel of his foot presses eagerly against a prominent bulge. his gaze flickers, darts to strained thighs then back up to glossy pupils, breathless when he asks, "do you want to be taken care of, julius? - will you let me do that?" then with a startingly soft run over a prominent cheekbone, "you can nod or shake your head - if you don't want to say it."

[untamedcowboy]

his cheeks flush, both from effort and the embarrassment of having all of charlie's undivided attention -- even though that's what he wanted all along. julius liked doing well, he liked being praised and he liked winning. he knows his fear of abandonment stems from his childhood, the paranoia that he'll be yesterday's news gnawing at him and eating away at his confidence every time charlie teases him a bit too much. he presses a lewd, wet kiss to the drooling tip before taking charlie back in his mouth -- saliva escaping the corner of his mouth and wetting his chin when charlie forces his thumb in. the sweet words julius wishes he could've heard several minutes ago make him dizzy, heart swelling with relief even though he can't verbally reply. what he lacks, he'll make up for in enthusiasm. he accommodates the stretch of charlie's thumb, trying to relax his jaw even more as he sinks further down on his length, the tip of charlie's cock nudging the back of his throat. tears prick at the corners of his eyes, but he's so hard it hurts. another oral fixation for the books, albeit charlie's cock was less damaging to his lungs than cigarettes. every word and reassurance from charlie's lips has heat pooling low to his sacrum, and he nods, desperate and feverish. story of his fucking life, julius thinks -- it'll destroy him over time, but it makes him feel good and he craves it, so he can't give it up. his head snaps back as charlie's foot begins to move, taking a quick breath of air and kissing the tip before he resumes bobbing his head, the shape of charlie's cock visible from julius' protruding cheek. julius moans, trying to match the pace of the foot stroking him, precome dribbling onto the flat of his tongue before he abruptly pulls off. his hair is ruffled, lips a bright swollen pink as he looks up at charlie through his lashes, chest rising and falling. "come on my face.. my collarbones, in my mouth. wherever you want." this is the only way to express that he reciprocates, licking his lips and swallowing hard before following it up with, "i like you too."

[planetsorbit]

they meet each other, claw for claw, bite for bite - the bitterness of pride and insecurity cresting taller and taller, and it shouldn't surprise charlie when it escalates. he shouldn't be shocked by the temporarily forceful hand, nor the taunting mimicry of savage heat to distant cold. he doesn't think their prior interaction was as cruel as this, but he recognizes the act like a confession as much as an insult. so it is all the more confusing when his mind straddles the line; one half of him hurt and furious, the other half more attached than before. there's something broken meant to be unravelled here, but charlie forgoes any attempt by grabbing julius on the wrist. "will you stop leaping to conclusions?" although their differing heights keep charlie from properly communicating the weight of his desires, he takes what he knows into his hands, shoving julius back against the door frame. with his right pinning julius' wrist to the wood, his left snakes to the back of his neck - mirroring for a moment, before fisting handfuls of soft brown hair. the kiss is biting, greedy, hips rising to cage julius at first - but there is a telltale heat radiating from between their legs, and this dizzies charlie. it's overwhelming enough to learn about one's own desperation, and the lengths in which he'll chase it - but however incidental, it's striking to think their wavelengths finally - finally match up. it's miraculous enough that he pulls from the kiss, eyelids heavy when he stares at julius' expression. "...you're not running away." a threat, a promise, or an exclamation, charlie doesn't clarify. instead, he gives in just somewhat, left hand rising further to the crown of julius' head, and tugging. "don't run away," he breathes, "stay here." the direction is blunt and clear when he urges julius to kneel. "i want you to stay here with me." and charlie has the audacity to blush.

[untamedcowboy]

julius huffs at that, because without charlie speaking to him, what else can he do but draw his own conclusions? this was a violent kind of devotion, more faithful to his own emotions than whatever bible verse his father assigned him to read. julius realizes his actions aren't entirely rational nor rooted in logic, and that's the scariest thing of all. whenever charlie retaliates by shoving and pinning him against the doorframe, a gasp escapes his lips when his back collides with the wood. it's an easy enough hold to get out of, if he wanted to. there are two power dynamics that linger over them like a ghost: their class differences as well as differences in physique. julius moans into charlie's mouth when their hips brush, lashes fluttering as he makes a show of trying to get out of charlie's hold -- jostling his wrists. the chase of it is exciting, taboo but arousing. then charlie says he's not running away. should he be? julius doesn't remember. he is dizzy and overwhelmed, with a bit of fatigue settling in to his bones and he can't entirely remember what they were arguing about. he exhales shakily when he realizes what charlie is urging him to do, dropping to his knees without much fight. the corners of his lips curve downwards into a pleasing pout, and julius glances up at him with a soft, "okay." julius unbuckles charlie's belt to pull the slacks down pale thighs, mouth parting when sees the tented briefs. he aims to tease when he drags the tongue along the fabric by the cockhead, disappointed to not taste any precome. the scent of charlie is stronger here, and julius doesn't dislike it at all. julius tugs the briefs down, marveling at the pretty cock framed by dark pubes, licking his lips before he looks up and says, "be appreciative, or i'm going to stick my fingers up your ass." there's still some frustration bubbling under his skin from earlier, but maybe he'll feel better after this, after they both vent it out with their bodies. julius wraps his mouth around the tip, a large palm stroking the rest of the length until his jaw is relaxed enough to take the entire length of him in, his hands having moved to the back of charlie's thighs. he bobs his head, fingers digging into the soft flesh as he runs the flat of his tongue over the beading slit. julius moans around him, his own hips jerking ever so slightly before he pulls off, kissing down the shaft and gazing up at charlie's face through sooty lashes with every deliberate, savoring lick.

[planetsorbit]

is there no substance to you? at this, charlie's expression fractures. there is a storm brewing, one as bright as the cherry of julius' ciggie, and he's stiff-necked, tense at every junction. "you were just about to leave without communicating, and i just asked you a question. i wasn't demanding anything of you or calling the shots - i," and he burns a bit here, because there is some truth to that particular yearning - that the control inebriates him, makes him loose-lipped in all the wrong ways it seems - but he's anchored to the argument. "this isn't just new to you - it's new to me too." if charlie takes a step back, he may recognize the cold fact that their respective egos were bruised - that the thing they're circling would all be doused clean if he could acknowledge the undeniable; that they were interested in each other, that they wanted something serious, something romantic with every string attached. if he were brighter, he could admit to this, if he wasn't himself - or if his experiences had prepared him for the ways in which attraction took up concerning space in his self-worth. up close however, the trees are daunting, the gates too tall to climb without excessive effort. he wants to fight - reflexively - but there isn't anything he can say that he won't regret, near instantly. his tongue is twisted in his mouth, decorum flying from habit as he overrides every other path, and snatches the cigarette from julius' lips. " - how can i guarantee that you're not playing around? you're demanding that i make my feelings clear, but your instinct is to run from me - what does that communicate?"

[untamedcowboy]

he scoffs, because julius did linger to explain that he was leaving, although he didn't want to disclose the ugly truth. that he feels unwanted here. julius' gaze darkens, breathing faster from adrenaline alone -- he feels like they're about to fight, but they remain at a stalemate. julius understands, that there is very little he can ask for. he is well aware. but he had thought that behind closed doors, things would be different and he wouldn't have to be hypervigilant all the time, feeling insecure constantly. if they do have genuine feelings for each other, neither one of them is ready to admit it. it pains him, tears pricking at his eyes as suppressed emotion claws up his throat. "then i have to be patient with you? i've tried to communicate clearly. i'm not going to force your hand on anything," julius insists, and then when the cigarette is pulled from his lips, he glares at charlie. he says enough with his gaze alone. "i'm not playing around. maybe at the start, but for a long time i've been sincere and trying. here," julius says, taking a slow step forward to cup charlie's cheek in his palm, the other hand on the back of his neck as he leans down to kiss charlie hungrily. he mimics their kiss from earlier when charlie had teased him, his tongue sweeping over the seam of charlie's lips and kissing him until there was little resistance left, his thumb gently stroking at charlie's jaw. the expression on julius' face is vulnerable and sad. "what does that communicate?" he repeats, molten browns flitting over charlie's face, his own jaw tensed -- then he gently pries charlie's mouth open to spit into the hot cavern of his mouth. "or this?" julius is reacting to this, hot and heavy between his legs, but pride makes him stop, his hands dropping back to his sides. he looks despondent, unsure if charlie understands at all. "maybe later. i've gotta run an errand." it's petty to remind him of it, but it felt frivolous. at this point, julius ought to just keep turning tricks - he'd get the same amount of emotional investment.

[planetsorbit]

he doesn't want to make a sweeping assumption, and he doesn't want to be insensitive - but a budding thought creeps into charlie's head. on one hand, there is enough weight in julius' response to take it like a bittersweet script: a romantic plea, a confession of desire, of wanting plain and simple. this is a notion foreign and thus generally uncomfortable to him, not because the feelings aren't there but because - bashfully - they are. he should consider this line of thinking, should lean into the hurt in julius' eyes and disperse it with something sweet, something he's only ever read in novels decorated with prose. but there is a voice, a bit of shadow eating away at charlie's insides, and he's morbidly curious to entertain it. julius speaks of the uncertainty like it's a wound, and he thinks about covering it with duct tape, with clamping teeth, to mark skin in way of caressing. if he wants to feel desired, and to have it indisputable, charlie thinks there is something to be explored in aggression - in possession - in pain. his heartbeat rings in his ears, the risk of revealing this obsessive proposal more damaging than the alternative. but it sits in his head, size doubling with interest. "...you want me to be more explicit then? - with what i'm looking for?" charlie doesn't exert the energy just batting up against restrained muscles, but he does pinch the fall of julius' chin, thumb and index sliding inward as if testing the soft skin underneath. he doesn't reach julius' neck just yet, but his middle finger skims it - nail lightly dragging over a prominent adam's apple. like this, charlie gets to meet his eyes again. "you don't want to be doubtful anymore, is that right?"

[untamedcowboy]

julius is frustrated, confused, and overwhelmed. he feels like a prey animal backed into a corner, heart thudding against his ribs. it pisses him off, this cockiness of charlie's. he's earnestly tried to understand him, but when he's met with resistance julius can't help but put walls up of his own. if he had been expecting reassurances or validation that it was all in his head, julius was wrong to do so. that little flame of hope gets snuffed out, and something in him dies - but he doesn't show it. julius is tempted to be the provocateur, since charlie seems so dead set on doubling down as well. he watches charlie's face carefully, barely responsive to the fingers grazing over his chin and throat. it is a tickle. "considering you're from the east and i'm from the west, i think bein' communicative is beneficial for both parties, to put it mildly," he replies, tone dry and sarcastic. julius is unsure of charlie's intentions, and right now it seems he wants to keep it that way. "that's right. but you're still bein', as you said, all bark and no bite. is there no substance to you? you get to fuck me once and now you think you call all the shots?" julius laughs, a sharp breath with no humor in it. he's been going about this all wrong, wearing his heart on his sleeve when he should've had his game face on. in a con, everyone had a role to play, and if charlie is unwilling to trust him then he at least needs to know what role he's been given. he nudges charlie away, expression neutral as he lights up a cigarette, lashes fluttering as he inhales and exhales. plumes of smoke fan from his lips, steeling himself with resolve as he glances back over at charlie. "stop playing around." it was a warning and a plea. julius could burn bridges faster than any skilled arsonist.

[planetsorbit]

he's unsuspecting at first, not one to recognize yearning even if plain to see (he hasn't much experience in this realm), only accepting julius' comments as a good-natured quip. but the mood sinks like pennies into a fountain, and charlie's attention piques with the sudden promise of departure. he doesn't want to question julius' reasoning, but the lack of eye contact has him worried on instinct. "wait," the call of it slips from his mouth before he can scrounge up an explanation of his own. so charlie rounds this, and gets up - distance closing enough to extend an arm. (not yet, but his fingers twitch at his side.) " - what's wrong?" a dreaded question, and perhaps it reveals a little too much - illuminating an attachment they've wordlessly crowded, but a nervousness prickles to the surface, and charlie finds himself in the midst of another chase. the flip in his stomach is familiar, the desperation not yet overwhelming but uncomfortable enough to take note. the apartment's grown too quiet without julius. "i can help with the errands too," he reasons, almost childishly.

[untamedcowboy]

julius isn't quick to anger. instead, he gets frustrated and dejected, always eyeballing the door like a beaten dog. he wishes he wasn't so sensitive and prickly, but he can't change his nature, no matter how many times he's tried. julius just must be innately self-destructive. he bites the inside of his cheek, turning to look at charlie with a measured gaze. he doesn't know what's set julius off. "are you toying with me on purpose? or is it an accident? i remember askin' you if this was some kinda hustle." julius still can't say it. charlie is so hot and cold that it pushes him away, making him feel unwanted. they were similar enough despite their stark differences in culture, but he feels there's been some kind of breakdown in communication. after his mother passed and it'd just been julius and his brother, his father lost his shit. he became a zealot, giving away nearly everything they had to the church, for god knows what. he'd got jail time for stealing to survive, and after that he enlisted with lee. "i just want to know what you want from me. discretion in the outside world, that's fine and dandy but even here, it feels like you want to keep me on a short leash," julius says frankly, face crumpling as he avoids charlie's gaze. the power dynamic was too difficult for him to ignore. julius has always been impulsive, but perhaps this was a mistake. he scoffs. "no, you can't. it's a personal errand, i'm not buying groceries."

[planetsorbit]

he'd half expected julius to respond accordingly, but it's a strange thing to expect, stranger still to be correct. and he's already warm from the spices, but it seems only polite to chase the tip of julius' tongue, thumb briefly dipping into the wet cave of his mouth. "...yeah well. you don't seem to be against that." if not for their hard-earned meal, charlie would propose he mark him more thoroughly - and the thought of sucking a bruise into julius' inner thigh rouses him into deep breath. he settles, presently, for a kiss - leaning in swiftly as their mouths meet, greedy tongue lapping once into the part of julius' lips. they taste the same, savoury heat and faintly sweet soju. pulling back with a visible blush, charlie smiles, unintentionally teasing. "maybe later."

[untamedcowboy]

julius isn't sure what to make of their chemistry, if it will be a long lasting affair or a mere fluke. he is sure the novelty of himself will wear off fast, given his ever-changing moods and their stark differences. the thumb sweeps past the seam of his lips, jaw slackening as he watches charlie with an incendiary gaze, choosing not to follow up that remark. he had taken the bait, but charlie doesn't seem relieved or happy to hear it. the heat is abated when they kiss, julius receptive and welcoming to the hungry mouth and tongue moving against his own, a possessive hand resting at the back of charlie's neck. then, charlie pulls away and julius' brows knit, visible confusion on his face. "maybe later what? you've gone off talkin' to yourself." he can't help but feel frustrated then, charlie a victim of julius' fluctuating moods and himself a victim of charlie's whims. "what a fickle man," julius remarks, the ghost of a smile on his lips as he helps himself to a small portion of the food, clearing his bowl quickly with appreciative noises. he gives charlie a silly little thumbs up as he tips the last of the bowl into his mouth, then getting up to take his dishes to the sink for a soak. julius turns on the tap, feeling cosmically small for a man of his stature, and his eyes flit to the door. if he listened to his own instincts right now, he'd bolt. it'd become a habit to grab his shit and leave whenever he felt like he was taking up too much space, or his presence becoming unwanted. lee tried hard not to make him feel that way, even when julius was nothing but trouble and his disappearing acts were becoming more frequent. "thanks again for the meal. listen, i've gotta run some errands in town, but i'll be back," julius explains, toeing on his shoes as he lays out the groundwork for his absence.

[heustons]

JACOB ELORDI as Julius in On Swift Horses (2024) dir. Daniel Minahan

[planetsorbit]

the endearment rolls of julius' tongue like a habit; not through an air of hollowness, but one of sincerity. he appears to mean it at every turn. it makes charlie feel full, belly as if prematurely warmed with soups and hot coffee and melted brown sugar. it's more than sweet, is what he means, it feels dreamy and hopeful, romantic without effort. "might clear your gut too," he muses, gathering the pair two bottles of tapioca-distilled soju, and shot glasses each. (he's grown quite used to the alternative flavour - though he's looking forward to the lifting of the rice-based liquor ban.) charlie sits at julius' corner, knees already bumping underneath the table. "i appreciate the help," he returns, reflexively humble, then snapping free the aluminum cap, pours them each a full shot. pinching one, he lifts it to julius' glass, "jal meokge sseumnida," and tips it back. it's light on his tongue, equally light on the way down, and as soon as he sighs, digs in proper. it's wonderfully normal. the tension he finds familiar is missing, the snide commentary and judgmental looks mere memories, and even amidst the hunger, charlie sneaks glances in julius' direction, fondness doubling by the minute. he can't blame himself for the crush that seems to bud at the base of his spine - not when he's become privy to julius' intimate body as well as his seemingly natural sweetness. it is a combination too powerful to overcome on his own, even less probable when in such close vicinity. the food is delicious, but he eats with his gaze just as much. "even if you're stationed here, i can't imagine you're getting food like this at the base - right?" when he shifts in his seat, their feet press temporarily against the other. then, grinning toothily, charlie lifts a thumb to the corner of julius' mouth - smearing away the red stained skin. it's foreign, it's cute. "...dakdoritang will do this, leaves it's stubborn mark."

[untamedcowboy]

julius' brows furrow at that, gnawing at his bottom lip before he huffs a laugh. "lots of fiber, i presume. travelling and bein' on a ship can kind of, uh, stop you up. we'll say this meal is medicinal," he reasons, an easy smile on his lips. the fact that it was so easy to smile around charlie, easy to say exactly what was on his mind should scare him. logically, he knows that. but his brain and soul were separate. he watches charlie pour the shots for them both, curious as he sheepishly repeats charlie's korean, voice deep and tentative. "jal meokge sseumnida." julius turns his head to the side, a palm hiding his mouth as he throws back the shot, throat working before he turns back to face charlie. even though he doesn't intend to stay long-term, julius makes the effort of trying to assimilate. "thank you for cooking," he says directly to charlie, gaze unwavering as he lightly nudges the outline of his foot with his own back, then laughs. a silent flirtation with the soles of their feet. "hell, most definitely not. normally, we don't have this many ingredients at hand, so it's nice to have something flavorful for once." julius blinks when the thumb sweeps across the corner of his mouth, flushing as his eyes darken with something imperceptible. the spice is known for leaving stains? he licks the corner of his mouth, tongue chasing the ghost of charlie's touch. "you leave a stubborn mark too."

[planetsorbit]

charlie laughs, a twinkle in the crack of it, "i'll do my best," agreeable when he takes julius in a stiff handshake. (as much as he's endeared to meet him again - he prefers the reasoning to be of a less serious nature.) the cooking process is seamless - natural and more domestic than he's ever had the chance to properly experience, and what's stranger still - is how little he notices. he grins at the little details, focuses with readied chopsticks, wipes and cleans where he should - all the while glancing over at julius when his attention strays. the stew is largely done at this point - spices now incorporated into the broth, meat marinated and bubbling. he's stirring up the contents at the base when julius takes to his side, and charlie, after blowing at a hot spoonful, lifts it to the taller's lips. his free hand hovers below, wary of the spill. when it's emptied, he lets himself stare at the purse of julius' mouth, cheeks warm with affection. "how is it? - too spicy?"

[untamedcowboy]

as they prepare the meal together, unexpectedly, julius begins to understand his brother a little more. he can't remember the last time he prepared a meal with family, other than with the men in his unit. sometimes, these memories that come back in floods, are enough to make a grown man cry. julius steels himself, his gaze unbelievably soft as he looks at charlie blowing on the spoonful for him. he accepts it, savoring the stew and chewing slowly, brows furrowed as he gives a thumbs up. his lips are lightly stained from the gochugaru. "it's not too spicy. it's perfect, honey," julius reassures, cheeks dimpling. "i like spicy stuff, anyhow. clears your sinuses real good, don't it?" he sniffs, wiping his nose with the back of his palm. julius wants to help, so he stands up and grabs some pot warmers to cushion his hands before he lifts the pot to place on a nearby coffee table. it's been a long time since he's set a table, but he grabs the chopsticks and spoons to set down. then, he sits down cross-legged as julius waits for charlie to join him. "c'mere, you labored the most over this, come put your feet up."

[planetsorbit]

he purses his lips, as if biting away a toothy grin. he'll give his parents this; charile's way with words, in a few languages at least, often keep him out of trouble. "i'm studying to be a criminal defence lawyer so - it's expected of me." (there's a sliver of pride rippling underneath his response, though humility is a virtue charlie white knuckles in habit.) julius' following quip triggers in him another burst of energy, hips jerking away belatedly when a hand comes down to his rear. he laughs with pinched eyes, oblivious to the discomfort brewing beneath the taller's ribs. "why are you so certain it'd look bad? - i'm not an expert, i just have an eye for beautiful things." it's lighthearted and flirtatious and casual in a way that doesn't suit the world they live in, but to have such a conversation without it leading down a violent road, is relieving to say the least. hands now rinsed clean, charlie puts aside a smaller bowl, and mixes in a myriad of spices - rice wine and sugar and gochugaru (a pinch less than usual, lest julius go hungry), soy sauce, sesame oil, aromatics that enhance the dakdoritang recipe he's picked up from his grandfather, a decade earlier. he stirs the paste handedly, attention darting back to julius' gaze, "otherwise, we'll just have to be comfortable with this for now. cooking indoors, being careful." his own smile softens here, enthusiasm dimming when the air turns bittersweet. he's enjoying himself a sore amount. then, " - potatoes all ready? you can help me boil the water now, half full."

[untamedcowboy]

he plays it away well, but julius notices how charlie seems to glowing from within after that compliment. his heart swells. "it looks like it comes naturally to you. well, i'm no career criminal, but i may require those services of yours in the future. please look after me," julius lowers his head submissively, reaching to take charlie's hand in his theatrically to give it a vigorous shake, pre-emptively acting the part of someone who is looking for a second chance at life. he tries to laugh the discomfort away, a residual heat in his cheeks refusing to subside. julius has been called many things, but 'beautiful' wasn't really one of the repeat offenders. "you're on a streak, now, with these dangerously sweet words of yours," julius says, holding up two fingers in warning. "three strikes and i'll retaliate. watch yourself, honey." his cheeks dimple with a grin, no actual bite behind his words. he'd forgotten himself earlier - taking the joke far too literal, when it was only meant to cheer him up. julius watches charlie at work, tossing in a large variety of ingredients faster than he can name them and glances at the vibrant color compared to charlie's pale forearms. he turns to quickly finish up his own task, loading in the peeled potatoes and turning the burner up so it comes to a boil. once he's finished he returns to charlie's side, with the temperament of a dewy-eyed youth asking if he can try some cake batter. "can i taste?"

[cemeterysgirl]

ㅤㅤ" mhm, whatever that means. " she kind of felt like he was just through jargon at her to confuse her. religion had never been a fixture in her household, because she didn't have a household. she'd had a basement until she was eleven. and then a small room in her handler's home until she'd moved onto base at the start of the conflict. like most of her homes, this was only temporary, and so she meant to get as much as she could from it financially before leaving. and she was pretty sure that plan wouldn't involve finding a husband.

ㅤㅤhis attitude towards sexual empowerment was unexpected, but greatly appreciated, and it only made him extra attractive. " exactly— what if i were to marry a rich pilot, only to find out he doesn't know how to eat? " words were less subtle now, but still laced with the same flirtatious implication; blushing up at him as he started to play with the lace bodice keeping her heaving bosom in place. she was impressed, too, by his ability to see right through her. the single soldiers bought it, ate her romantic professions up before she'd move to their bunkmate, and repeat the same psychosexual ritual.

ㅤㅤbut julius was different. not only because she could genuinely feel her body ache for his, but because he was straight to the point. and his whispers sent shivers down her spine, one hand resting palm down against his chest whilst the other peeled the one of his that was resting on her waist away; quietly answering his hidden question as she led him to a quiet barn just behind the barracks, once full of animals and life, now used to store artillery. " why don't you want to marry? " she asked, the door creaking shut behind when she led him inside. " do you think you'll die? " another question, asked with a sensual tone despite its morbid topic. and, then, one more question: " is there someone you want me to be, julius? "

[untamedcowboy]

call it a hunch, but julius thinks they might be similar in a sense - without any formal education aside from what they've acquired in the workforce and on the streets. he isn't too surprised she doesn't know what he's talking about, and things are probably different in korea anyway. how's he to know? julius grins, a curious gaze wandering further down to the expanse of milky white thighs. "that's right. most of the men here are middle-class and can support you on their salary alone. any more comfortable than that and they're likely to start steppin' out on you," he muses, wondering if she's even the type to be bothered by that at all. most women would, but sasha wasn't most women. julius follows her without complaint, anticipatory heat pooling low in his belly. he recognized this area - but it's the first he's known of it being used for illicit means. julius laughs, breathless as he shakes his head. "why don't you?" it seemed like a question neither one of them were entirely comfortable answering, but julius decides to meet her half-way. "jus' doesn't look like the american dream to me, but i suppose it does to everyone else." he gives another shake of his head. julius wasn't afraid of dying. more so afraid of having to watch other people die, more than he already has. "is that a common thing they ask for?" julius laughs, raising his eyebrows, before a more uncertain and sheepish look covers his features. "my brother's girl. she's .. different than most. knows how to play cards, can drive a car."

and to say anything else could give him away, so julius stops there, leaning in to kiss the pale skin of her neck down to her collarbones before dropping to his knees. julius lifts up her skirt, gaze darkening as he exhales at the sight. she'd commented on his mouth as well, so hopefully she's not too disappointed when he uses it to tease her through the fabric of her panties, tongue creating damp spots in the fabric. after a bit of teasing, he tugs them down so he can reattach his lips to her cunt, jaw working as he sucks on her clit. julius' palms slide to the outside of her thighs, gingerly lifting them so her knees brace the side of his head - getting as close as he possibly can. julius was done talking but he wasn't done hearing from her, eagerly awaiting pitchy moans of pleasure as he drags his tongue along her folds, chin glistening with slick.

[planetsorbit]

his moods are becoming predictable. julius picks up on the hint without much prodding, and although charlie's looking down - snipping idly at some chicken with a set frown on his face, idling fingers interrupt his halfway focus. he listens intently, the wound up yarn ball of feeilngs in his chest too complicated to untangle - though julius does a startlingly good job at loosening the strings. and what begins as a countdown of frustration, ebbs into a quiet understanding. he's appreciative as always, relieved to have julius in any shape - even if the days pass too quickly and the call for his eventual return to the barracks will strike him deadlier than necessary. the bittersweet recognition of this feels apropos of their conversation. "i wish they understood that the way you do." (charlie almost wants to imply them something of a family of their own - however abrupt that may be.) then, turning down to the meat again, he gathers the drumsticks into an adjacent bowl of marinade, and rests the chopping board by the sink for a later scrub. charlie's fingers are cool under the running tap. "your brother doesn't know any better," he murmurs, attempting sympathy up front, except, "but it doesn't make these sentiments any easier to digest. it's as if they haven't considered the fact that we've tried this already - the experimenting of it all." charlie's had a few exchanges of his own - two of which had went far enough to be deflective examples of a 'normal lifestyle', but neither of them had went well in his head. they should've felt natural, and yet they felt anything but. then, feeling the heaviness loom overhead, he teases julius with an out, "should one of us dress up? - i'm quite well-known in korea, so your identity would better suit going undercover, is my thought. a bit of lipstick and a strong wig."

[untamedcowboy]

julius enjoys these vignettes of normalcy, the simple joy of preparing a meal together with a person you trust and feel comfortable around. he knows it won't last, not forever, because these taken for granted moments come along once in a blue moon for someone like him. when charlie responds with something kind but truthful about julius' brother, he smiles, hand dropping so he can lean down and place a kiss against the nape of charlie's neck. "oh, but you're good, aren't you? y'could be a politician. that was a very diplomatic answer," he teases, anticipating a shiver in response. julius is teasing, but he's sincere as well, because charlie seems to be more people-smart than julius would've initially believed. he reckons that charlie's family might not know any better either, but he doesn't dare overstep. then julius has the tables turned around on him, charlie's own teasing causing him to grimace and pull away, playfully swatting his ass before returning to the potatoes. "you really are a right bastard. i would make a frightening woman, and you know it. have you experimented with that as well, then? since you seem to have the expertise," he murmurs, giving charlie a considering sidelong glance. julius doesn't know why, but the mere thought of himself doing that gives him a rising sense of panic, something curdling in his gut. it felt contradictory and complicated.

[cemeterysgirl]

ㅤㅤsasha's beauty was of a classical kind, in spite of the dark aesthetic she shrouds herself in. her lightly made-up face was decorated naturally with two moles, one just underneath her right eye, and one just an inch to the left of her cupid's bow — like the movie stars the soldiers had grown to miss from their screens. she never got tired of the way they looked at her, especially for the first time; like she was a brand new plaything, yet with enough familiarity to ease their nerves. she liked it, because for a short while, they were nice to her; doting on her, even, in unfamiliar ways that her procurer, and past customers, had starved her of. she figured it must stem from this bible belt he spoke of.

ㅤㅤ" so have you... " she noted, smiling smugly at the double meaning behind his words. he was different. more talkative, less frigid. she figured he didn't have anyone waiting for him back home, but she thought he was still lucky to have a home. sasha just lived here... sasha just kind of was. " but not you, then? you look smart. smart enough to know that your god abandoned you long before you put that uniform on. " not that she could complain. it looked so good on him. and his handsome face wasn't lost on her, either. she'd overheard other working girls talking about him, huddled together, away from her, and giggling about him — the quiet soldier, the lone soldier. the tall, handsome, and probably big soldier...

ㅤㅤ" why would i be disappointed? it's best to dip your feet in as much of the sea as you can when looking for love, though, is it not? marrying for something other than that would just be insanity. " she sounded genuine, but she was playing a character — unable to ever imagine herself able, or allowed, to quit to marry. but she'd wear a pretty white dress and let him have her in it... she'd been daydreaming when the weight of his hand overlapping hers brought her back, smiling with faux coyness but genuine attraction as he pulled her near. he was so tall, so broad, compared to her, he practically engulfed her... she all but moaned when he took her face in his hand, thinking about how it could probably cover her entire face, and her excitement grew between pressed-together thighs.

ㅤㅤpetals parted when he dragged his thumb along the lower one, a tiny noise sounding in the back of her throat when dark lipstick was smudged, before she tilted her head forward enough to kiss at the tip of his thumb. " and why wouldn't you take me seriously? isn't that what you're all looking for, a pretty wife? and we both know i'm the prettiest. " she kissed his thumb again, both hands wrapping around his wrist to pull his hand up; placing small kisses along the tip of each. " no more trouble than i can handle. why? are you worried about me already? "

[untamedcowboy]

he smiles when she returns the same compliment to him, cheeks flushing because he'd been expecting something different. julius nods, an amused gaze flitting over the soft and rounded features on sasha's face. "i'm not smart in the standardized testing type of way, no. but i know plenty about a woman's anatomy, if that's what you mean. and i'm also a wayward black sheep from a religious household," he returns easily, figuring these were truths vague enough he could offer her without spooking her away. although, julius is certain she's had to take an impromptu psychiatry role with some of the men here, so perhaps he worries too much. julius tilts his head, the soft weight of his gaze darkening with intrigue. he's surprised by her answer, because promiscuity was frowned upon for both genders, although even more so for women. "i don't disagree. you ought to know someone inside and out before you get hitched. makes for less hiccups down the road, i reckon. stranger that it seems to be a radical thought," he muses, giving her hand a little encouraging squeeze. julius also reckons that sasha would like to be known by him. the only thing that makes him hesitant is that the last time he was caught fraternizing with someone in that way, he'd caught hell for it. julius likes the little noise that barely escapes her when he strokes over her bottom lip, pitchy and surprised. the sound is evocative enough to get blood rushing south, coupled with a contact-high from their proximity. such a little darling. "that's not what i'm looking for. yes, we both know that. we both know you're not actually looking for a husband either," he informs her, kissed fingertips pulling away to clasp at the pinch of her waist as the other idly toyed with the laces of her bodice, leaning in to mouth against the shell of her ear. "but i wouldn't be against consummating this sham marriage of ours, if you know a place."