goop or be glooped, Augustus

et tu Gweneth paltrow? -augustus gloop Matt | he/him | 26

[deoxoid]

his wife has filled THEIR house with ANTIQUES. to AVOID DAMAGING HER VALUABLES i fuck him on the floor

[enba-and-luka]

[paranoidgemsbok]

Stardew valley is problematic because it forces you to have an outside cat in a threatened woodland environment

[human-pet-they]

[johncagedigicoreremix]

pretending to forgive my inner child so it comes out of hiding and i can deliver the final blow

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[trenchgun]

john karkat is entering kindergarten this fall

[aph-lithuania]

john karkat is entering high school this fall

[gailcarriger]

[anythings-a-sweet-if-you-eat-it]

boring take from real 21st century idiots: bdsm is bad because it's basically torture

interesting take from a fictional 14th century monk: torture is bad because it's basically sex

[ohholydyke]

Shoutout to the nun who had other nuns tie her up and pour hot wax on her as she confessed her sins

[amorphousgenderlesscryptid]

I'm sure that's true, but something tells me googling "nun tied up by other nuns" "hot wax" "confessing sins" will likely get what you might call rather un-academic results

[mostcodesareciphers]

stop tagging your heated rivalry bullshit with “game changer” im tryna look at gifsets of anna garcia beating up demi adejuyigbe while josh rueben fucks a sam reich mannequin in a baby carrier.

[dwayne-thespock-johnson]

I haven't renewed my subscription what the fuck could I have possibly missed

[vaguedisapproval]

sign up to dropout for just $6.99 a month, and you too can explore consensual non-consent in a safe and judgement-free environment.

[succumbing-song]

[sleepingreader]

While Eva is a dutch first name, Stratt isn't a Dutch last name.

I hereby present reasons for Eva Stratt to be named that

1. Andy Weir did his research bad (boooring)

2. Stratt has a German dad and a Dutch mom but lives in the Netherlands (plausible)

3. Grace misheard Stratt say 'I'm Deutsch' and assumed she was Dutch (funny as hell and very in character)

[mousetrappart]

POV: The man you drugged and forcibly sent to space to die for the good of humanity returns with a solution thirteen years early in the hands of a god from hit 2003 video game Pokemon: Ruby & Sapphire, which is apparently real. Also there's another alien with him.

[foulserpent]

this site really did suck so fucking bad when its demographic was straighter

[pacmastermeow]

i don't believe such a time ever existed

[foulserpent]

[dragginage]

this post always kills me bc i’m like 90% sure the picture behind him is this:

[plague-vulture]

washing dishes is evil because you go "oh fuck there's so many dishes this is gonna take foreverrr" and then you enter the dish abyss and emerge with your abdomen somehow covered in water and your hands all wrinky and then you look at the clock and what felt like half an hour was actually 10 minutes

[sillyimage]

x

[i-suggest-poly]

I have a suggestion

[isuggestswiftmarketregulation]

I also have a suggestion

[i-suggest-poly]

I think I'm in love with you