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[tractorfrog]

Daniel Molloy really is the character ever, huh. Like. Youre a twenty something reporter, coked out of your mind without a dollar to your name who stumbles across flesh and blood vampires in the middle of a gay bar. Instead of shitting yourself immediately and running away, you decide to keep going with the interview you didn’t actually think would be happening (you thought you were going to hook up bdsm coffin style with the complete stranger in his apartment, that you told no one you were going to, by the way, in peak serial killer 1970’s San Francisco.) You have a SCREAMING match with said vampire about his shitty french ex boyfriend, (clearly a very sensitive topic, he’s just spent the last three hours ranting about him in what you assume is a coke addled breakdown), and get SURPRISED when you’re turned into a living chew toy???!! His very hot boyfriend wrestles him off you, and oh, great, you’re safe now, right? WRONG. SIX DAYS OF PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE, because apparently your natural charisma is so frustrating to this guy it warrants him rooting around your brain like a pick and mix.

Youre a septuagenarian with Parkinson’s, and you get an email asking you to go BACK to see these dudes again, and you GO. Alright man. Sure. Whatever.

[marysyp96]

[darcymolloy]

[winkypants]

the best argument for The Vampire Lestat being well written…

…is in all the hate blogs and their operative word of “shouldn’t”. Lestat shouldn’t! Armand shouldn’t! Louis shouldn’t! Daniel shouldn’t! But pretty much never “wouldn’t”. No one can say Lestat *wouldn’t* make fun of Armands sexual trauma. Daniel *wouldn’t* be hateful and conniving in his interviewing. Louis *wouldn’t* cross the line and play pretend with Regina. Armand *wouldn’t* flip on a dime after being rejected. Etc etc etc. Just that they *shouldn’t* and……shouldn’t (but did) is kind of vampires like, Whole Thing ™.

I have seen the absolute best takes written by hate blogs, who completely captured the essence of the story being told, but instead of having a good time, they hate it. And it’s just amazing honestly. Because it’s like. You did it. You got the show exactly. You understand the why.

You just don’t. like. it.

and now you are pretending and philosophizing and humanizing monsters and their different points of view of other monsters. And yeah, that sounds miserable babe but your cognitive dissonance is cracking me UP.

[xxsaintbaldwinxx]

[michaelormewood]

oh okay

[michaelormewood]

"I want an epic kiss in the rain or a big speech about how someone loves every little flaw about me or someone running in and interrupting a party to call my name so everyone turns to look. And then it's quiet except for, like, a little clink or two of silverware. And then I'm like-- what are you doing here?"

[yaoiblackmold]

Journey to Babel happening after Amok time is so incredibly funny because in that episode Jim learned that Vulcans have a heat cycle and his first officer has to fuck right now or he'll die. Met Spocks WIFE and also learned that T'Pau the most influential person on Vulcan is related to Spock, got into a messy three way divorce arc between T'Pring, Stonn and Spock, then having to literally fight Spock to the death and DIED. And yet after all of that extremly personal drama Jim witnessed Spock still didn't tell Jim who the fuck his parents are. Like the man is insane, your best friend and captain saved you from a fuck or die situation, got you out of a loveless marriage, literally died for you and you still won't introduce him to your mom and dad.

[lejay-the-impossible]

bartimaeus in his gargoyle form in your artstyle 👀

'I am your master! How dare you treat me like some piece of garbage?!'

'Oh please, don't offend me like that. I'm way more careful with garbage'.

I had so much fun designing Bart's gargoylesona

[hapalopus]

Looove the worldbuilding in the Bartimaeus books. Every scientist throughout history, from Ptolemy to Copernicus to Linnaeus, was actually a magician who couldn't've done their work without their enslaved demons. The books take place in England in the 90s/00s. From what few descriptions we get, fashion seems stuck in the 70s. Society is segregated between magicians and commoners. Commoners can sell their children to be magicians apprentices because magicians legally aren't allowed to reproduce. Electricity is a recent invention, chiefly used for light bulbs, laptops, and cattleprods that the police use on commoners who rise up against the regime. Laptops are just digital typewriters, there's no internet, and only secretaries and magicians have them. Many magicians still use quills. "Typical magician architecture" is office towers of glass and steel with minimalist white walls. British prime minister William Gladstone overthrew the monarchy with the aid of powerful demons. Cars and buses exist but in the Czech Republic they use horse carts because Gladstone sent their country back to the middle ages with a demonic nuclear bomb. Common entertainment includes theater (with special effects performed by enslaved demons), and going down to the Crystal Palace to throw rotten tomatoes at prisoners of war. Television, film, and cameras don't exist. War propaganda is shared with commoners via woodcut pamphlets. And the great war England is fighting in the year 2004? The American Revolutionary War.

[unnonexistence]

hermann pining after newt is my favourite because he's so unnecessarily tortured about it. he suffers. he yearns. he is by turns ashamed of and disgusted by his own feelings. desperate tragic longing fills his heart, and yet he dares not speak on the matter, for newton evidently doesn't reciprocate. it is agony.

and it's all for a guy who wears godzilla print underwear, regularly plays air guitar in the shower, and once said retroviral DNA integration was, quote, "punk rock."

absolutely perfect. 10/10, no notes.

[orcboxer]

movies will be like "THIS is the most bullied outcast unpopular girl in school... the Thin White Heterosexual Brunette"

[kaijukebox]

Ah yes, returning to my Jmart roots.

-

No refs today

[theglowqueen]

Daisy: "People say that you and Jon are close."

Martin, twirling his hair like a school girl: "They do?? Who said that? I want names."

Daisy: "This is a police interview."

[ravelqueen]

Lmao OMFG Martin. He's now confirmed to have been jealous of

- (possibly lesbian?) Cop for daring to have private conversations with Jon

- literal embodiment of death Jon has only metaphorically met in a coma-dream

- lady he talked to for half an hour, once

Truly he is the "you know other people" meme

[vale-gaai]

nothing personal but this kind of comment rlly exemplifies to me a disconnect between canon and popular fanon jmart characterization because they almost literally had this conversation in canon - except, their lines are swapped!

jon, for all his scared grouchiness, is a secret romantic, while martin, for all his forced optimism, is at his core a pragmatist

[starrodent]

just some sillies