confused but happy to be here

practice arena for unmasking and the ordeal of being known, etc. unfortunately my core self is mostly just, argumentative

[waltzenberg]

I have to say one thing about doctors that really pisses me off is when they start touching you or moving you around with zero warning. Maybe other medical professionals too but I mostly see it with doctors. Especially when it comes to areas that are usually covered by underwear. When I was a teenager I fell badly on some ice and the doctor wanted to feel the base of my spine for injuries. Makes sense! But I got no heads up before he suddenly stuck his hand down the back of my pants to feel my tailbone. These days I see doctors move a patient's bra/shirt and stick their hand holding a stethoscope on their breast to listen to the lungs without saying a single thing to the patient beforehand. Even something like just picking up a person's leg and moving their pants to check edema when they're lying in bed with absolutely no preamble. I'm sorry but would you feel comfortable waltzing up to a coworker and casually sliding your hand under their clothes without so much as a howdy-do? No? Why is it different for your patients then? It's so dehumanizing and can feel so violating depending on your comfort level with relative strangers grabbing at your body with no warning!

I'm an occupational therapist and when I am working with a patient I am constantly hands on helping with positioning, giving tactile cues, etc. It takes zero effort to say "hey I'm going to have a hand on this belt to help steady your balance when you stand up" or "can I help adjust this line/pull your pants up over your hips/whatever" whenever you need to touch a different body part or in a new situation etc. Zero effort, friends. Takes barely any time. Dare I say a habitual response that would take more effort to suppress when communicating with the actual human beings who are my patients.

I do notice male doctors doing this more than female doctors and more often to female patients but it doesn't always follow exact gender delineations. I don't see male nurses or therapists doing that shit though. Of course this is all anecdotal and extremely limited from my own personal experience. But it's just so disheartening to keep seeing this and realizing how common it is. And I'm certain it is so so much worse for patients with longterm disabilities dealing with this kind of dehumanization on a much broader level. It's just so frustrating because it should be such a small thing to do but the way it's so often overlooked makes me queasy to think of the mental disconnect some doctors have from viewing/treating their patients like real human beings.

[julykings]

recovery bug 1

[maculategiraffe]

ptsd is such fucking cosmic bullshit. congratulations you survived something unspeakable. your reward is that your entire brain is fucked forevermore. enjoy working ten times as hard to scrape any kind of happiness or normalcy out of existence, even when everything is objectively fine. let alone when it isn't

[waltzenberg]

My loves, PTSD is not incurable. Please don't create an inevitability to surrender to.

[feralkitten420]

"You need to relax"

Best I can do is dissociate

[lizardho]

I’m reading a book on biofeedback trainings right now and they talk about this. The words “try” or “need” add pressure to stuff. Sometimes switching from “I need to calm down” or “I’m trying to slow my breathing” to “I’m allowing myself to calm down a little more with each exhale” or “I’m giving myself permission to slow my breathing” can be more helpful. There’s a difference between “try to relax the muscle” and “allow the muscle to soften” that is significant enough that for some people it can totally change the outcome of a relaxation exercise.

For other tips and tricks, instead of asking “why” you can’t change a thought/feeling (why being an offensive question, meaning it forces you to respond defensively - in this case defending the emotion you don’t like) you can ask “is there any leeway or wiggle room with this feeling/thought/belief for something else?” Oftentimes we know multiple things at once, and by allowing for a small amount of ambiguity we can start to accept the situation more fully.

[chavisory]

[waltzenberg]

Wh...there are fucking map stores????

[shamebats]

[twinkwolf]

there are gay women. like, queer women

[koboldflock]

The dehumanization of kids causes people to expect some big change when they become adults meaning that they just don't feel human or adult for the entirety of forever and ever

[alt-rock-confessions]

the coolest thing about writing Franz Ferdinand fanfiction is that sometimes they see it and reference it in one of their songs

OH MY GOD

(which song is that?)

[alt-rock-confessions]

Alex Kapranos on fan fiction in conversation with Canadian online review magazine Chart Attack in November 2004:

"[Fan fiction] was pointed out to me at one point and I thought it was very humorous," Kapranos says. "The thing I didn’t realize is that there are so many hot blooded girls who are really kind of into this voyeuristic thing about homosexual sex. At first I thought they’d been spying on my private life and then I realized it’s just fantasy."

"I think it’s brilliant. It’s really, really funny. And I like that sort of thing cause it means that there’s people who have imagination who are inspired by your personality and the things that you’ve done, so it’s a good thing," he says.

"There’s absolutely nothing wrong with fictionalizing a genuine character as long as you make it clear that you are fictionalizing, which I think all that slash stuff does."

[...]"It’s what we do in songs as well," he says. "I mean, we take characters who are around us and write stories, write songs about events that have happened in their lives. Of course, when you tell any story, you make it dramatic, you use the tools of drama to make an exciting story. All they’re doing is an extreme example of what we do."

[grifoncito]

[prompts-in-a-barrel]

"You don't know me. I'm not the same person anymore."

"That's okay. I'll get to know you again."

[californiannostalgia]

[depsidase]

[veryberryskye]

yeah i like to give my blessing to the most pathetic looking weak little knight at the tournament. she can’t even look me in the eye when i give her my flower and she stutters out that she’ll do her best or something of the like. i think its funny when she has to cry and beg my forgiveness and i get to say “such a shame, i suppose my hand in marriage will have to go to someone else…” and then i get to hear her whimper like a dog. ive done this like 6 times alrea-

did she just win.

[the-stew-goblin]

I shall prepare a stew for the wedding! Extra salt!

[veryberryskye]

wait wait wait stew goblin wait

[peachdelta]

get ready for the wedding

[notbecauseofvictories]

A customer contacted our team with questions, and then finished their email with: "I am daunted by the complexities and unknowns." I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since.

[cameoappearance]

Reblog if you are daunted by the complexities and unknowns

[nyctosaurid]

i dont know how people handle the world without looking at pictures of little tiny mice sitting on wheat

[nyctosaurid]

powerful…

[dykerikki]

crawls out of my hole that resembles the grave but isnt. #myholethatresemblesthegravebutisnt

[ryebreadgf]

[uwillneverknowwho]

Literally always take headphones with you. If you decide that you probably won't need them today, that's the devil talking. You will. You will

[homoqueerjewhobbit]

Music playing at the grocery store is psychological warfare. Protect yourself.

[waltzenberg]

Sometimes you will be Working and a coworker sitting behind you will take a Banana out of her bag and Eat it. I know, it's terrifying. We must be prepared for attacks from all sides