Okay first off, I went to the Queen Herself and watched some videos, also got lucky and found her book in a thrift store so that helped.
Second advice from my stepdad: remember that SPACE is valuable too, not just the ownership of the things that fill the space.
Third: If I've had something I intend to "use later" for more than I year, I'm probably never gonna ACTUALLY use it. So donate it or trash it. Scraps are easy to find when you want them- they're not irreplaceable gold. Odds are if I need scrap Denim there will be people I can ask, I don't need to hoard my own unless I have a full plan I intend to carry out- and even then, would the finished product make me happy? Or would it be just another thing that takes up space?
Fourth: I'm resourceful and smart. I'm not gonna be helpless without this one thing. Screwdrivers? Yeah, as long as there are no duplicates, I should hold onto them. Lamps, unused jars, winter clothes that don't fit me? They stress me out, I don't need them, someone else can use them, and they aren't gonna improve my life. I make peace with that.
Like Ms. Kondo is right that it's difficult but damn, acknowledging what doesny make me happy has been so good at figuring out what DOES make me happy, and the nine grocery bags of scrap fabric I had in my closet were NOT doing that