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supreme-leader-stoat

“This story is a tragedy because it didn’t have to end this way.”

“This story is a tragedy because it was always going to end this way.”

schizoprophet

#a REALLY good tragedy is locked in quantum uncertainty between these two states

teaboot

I hate you Ozempic craze I hate you 'heroin chic' I hate you weight loss ads on public radio I hate Burn Fat Fast ads every thirty seconds I hate you I hate you I hate you

teaboot

I grew up before the term 'thigh gap' was invented I grew up before 'hip dip' was invented I was born before 'muffin top' was a thing before 'clean girl look' was a thing before 'glass skin' was a thing before razoring off peach fuzz was a thing and I'm so so so fucking tired of us inventing new concepts purely for the purpose of convincing people to hate their own bodies enough to buy products

teaboot

Last time Tuberculosis ran through the USA a small number of people got it on purpose to look skinny and waifish and delicate and used makeup to look flushed and bony and when the Victorians figured out tapeworms people would infect themselves on purpose to starve themselves smaller and women and now in the year of our lord 2026 there is a noticeable fraction of the USAmerican population genuinely thrilled about a treatment-resistant microbial parasite that makes you shit and vomit your brains out for a month because side effects include weight loss and STILL we talk about being skinny like it's the natural default setting for all healthy people as if it's a self-sustaining standard and not an imaginary goal that we are constantly constantly constantly beating ourselves with a whip to acheive

cuppydogshane

all the rights that come with marriage you should be able to have without marriage btw. you should be able to designate a person who can visit you in the hospital regardless of your relationship to that person.

makingtrouble

It's my cat's birthday (anniversary of me getting him) so I told him the story of his life while petting him real good

Highlights include:

For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.

Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.

Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.

I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.

I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.

Now you've lived with me for five years. Five is like the number of toe beans on one of your feet. When I clip your nails five is when we're halfway done. But we're hopefully not even halfway done with how long we get to be together. I'm gonna have to figure out new ways to help you count.

makingtrouble

Actually I've decided this is a poem

quadriceps-deactivated20171230

hey

rcktpwr

not in the mood today quincy

c3po

seriously.. read the mood quincy

quadriceps-deactivated20171230

sorry guys

spellinwaiting

not many people know this but when talking about your multiple pronoun-using friend you build up a combo meter for every subsequent unique pronoun you use

not-your-average-url

I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.

I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.

lovehype

i hate this place i want to go to build a bear

lovehype

me and the besties going to build a bear

leftnipsdoodles

powerful mental image, had to get it out

erisluna35

I felt bad for Beth. Had to include her.

cepheusgalaxy

"Doomed yaoi" this "doomed yuri" that what about doomed found family. What about finding comfort in these new people after going through so much on your own—a community, a solace, a home to come back to. Caring for them with all you've got, only to realize that it wasn't going to work, ever, no matter what you tried. Only to have it ripped apart, no matter how much you tried to hold them close. Found family that becomes lost family. Found family that takes your heart with it when they go.

nakamorijuan

gayweeb

this is wrong

southerngamerguy-deactivated201

Yeah, she could’ve done this in her standard Sailor Moon form. Super form is overkill, really.

halfpastcaketime-deactivated201

Sailor Moon is stronger than Goku. I don’t make the rules. Fight me about it.

dragonxball

What!? 👀

seidmadr-secrets

I’m on a still active forum, with a solid vs debate scene. Sailor Moon vs. the God-Emperor of Mankind from 40k is one of the most treasured threads there, as Sailor Moon trashed the guy.

catbureau

19 pages straight of debate over Sailor Moon vs. God-Emperor of Mankind, in which every time a 40k fan desperately brings up a new point, it immediately gets negated by another one of Sailor Moon’s powers

thissweetenamor

dickstolebyanalien

snowstorm that makes you old

baby its old outside

i really cant age

baby its old outside

“global birth rates are declining”…… yeah and so are the reblog rates on tumblr.com too, so what now

exigencelost

I maintain that Hey There Delilah by Plain White Tees is a 450% better song if it’s about a guy who’s lost custody of his daughter

exigencelost

Literally every lyric has so much more Energies if it’s sung to a child I’m gonna die on this hill. “Hey there, Delilah /Don’t you worry about the distance /I’m right there if you get lonely /Give this song another listen” and “Hey there, Delilah/ I know times are gettin’ hard /But just believe me, girl / Someday I’ll pay the bills with this guitar / We’ll have it good /We’ll have the life we knew we would / My word is good” like? He’s trying to get his daughter back? Idk if she’s with the other parent or in foster care or what but it’s So Much I have a lot of feelings about this. The repeated promises, “I’d walk to you if I had no other way” and “I’m right there when you get lonely” when, like, obviously, he’s not, and he’s just sort of desperately hoping that she still understands that he loves her, and that she doesn’t feel abandoned. And then, “Delilah, I can promise you /That by the time that we get through / The world will never ever be the same /And you’re to blame” that’s so fucking sweet? That’s such a sweet thing to say to your daughter. Romance is over. Noncustodial parental love songs are where it’s at.

celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725

This is what “death of the author” means. We know that’s not what the song was written about, but what if it was? What if we explored the lyrics as though the speaker was a heartbroken father missing his daughter? It changes EVERYTHING. And it’s so good.

Anyway, OP you are wonderful and I love you.

wisteria-lodge

Have always thought that “Hey there Delilah / you be good, and don’t you miss me” is a little creepy and infantilizing if sung to a romantic partner.

But if it’s a father, and he’s saying goodbye to the daughter he never gets to see, and he’s trying so hard to put on a brave face for her, then “You be good, and don’t you miss me” is shattering.