"Have you ever heard of Murphy's Law?"

The basic principle of Murphy's Law is that anything that CAN go wrong–– WILL go wrong. Me? I'm used to working around Murphy's Law. I am its namesake's great-great-great-great grandson, after all."

[whatxcanxgoxwrong]

❛ I burned by fingers and I cracked a nail! ❜

THE CREATURE FROM THE MEME ABYSS

@hawkeyeinvestigations

“Ouch! Well, darn! That’s no good!” he exclaims with a sympathetic cringe. “Have you already run cool water over it? Or applied a compress? Here, let me just see what I can find in my handy dandy backpack. There should be some bandages and burn cream in here unless I didn’t replace them from the microwave incident…”

Without another word––or explanation––he removes his trusty backpack from his shoulders and places it on the table in front of him… with a considerable thud.

Unlatching it, he opens the flap and peers inside, reaching in to begin rifling through its contents.

[rpmemesguys]

My muse catches yours out in the pouring rain! Send in '☔️' to see how mine reacts!

[stillxshexflies]

rpmemesguys:

[trainedtherapist]

‘The Mummy’ Sentence Meme

[stillxshexflies]

trainedtherapist:

I’ve dreamt about this since I was a little girl.

Compared to you, the other plagues were a joy!

I am proud of what I am.

Any last requests, pig?

Oh my god, I hate it when these things do that.

It seemed like a good idea at the time.

Is he supposed to look like that?

You’re wondering ‘what is a place like me doing in a girl like this’?

By the way, why did you kiss me?

No harm ever came from reading a book.

And you think this justifies the killing of innocent people?

Well, you probably won’t live through it.

Everyone else we’ve bumped into has died. Why not you too?

That’s called stealing, you know.

The only thing that scares me, [NAME], are your manners.

Death is only the beginning.

Are you sure you want to be playing around with this thing?

i lie to everyone; what makes you so special?

I only gamble with my life, never my money.

Well, of course I can swim if the occasion calls for it.

Do something! Do something!…Not that! Not that!

You always did have more balls than brains.

It’s better to be the right hand of the devil than in his path

You know, nasty little fellows such as yourself always get their comeuppance.

What friend? You are my only friend.

…I don’t want to tell you. You’ll just hurt me some more.

This just keeps getting better and better.

Personally, I think he’s filthy, rude, a complete scoundrel. I don’t like him one bit.

Well, he may have been a stinky fellow, but he had good taste.

He said he was ‘just looking for a good time.’

What do you suppose killed him?

Did you ever see him eat?

You probably could have gotten them for free, all we had to do was give him your sister.

Stupid superstitious bastard.

I thought you said you didn’t believe in all this fairy tales and hokum stuff!

Forget it! We’re out the door, we’re down the hall, and we’re gone.

I told you not to play around with that thing, didn’t I tell you not to play around with that thing?!

Do you really want to know, or would you prefer to just shoot us?

I appreciate you saving my life and all but when I signed on I agreed to take you out there and bring you back, end of job, end of story, contract terminated!

Ok look, you can either tag along with me or stay here… and try to save the world! What’s it gonna be?

Hey! Get your ugly face offa her.

There is only one person I know that can possibly give us any answers.

After what I just saw, I’m willing to go on a little faith here.

How about you darling, would you like a little kissy-wissy?

Take my hand and I will spare your friends.

He will never eat, he will never sleep, and he will never stop.

Oh, for heaven’s sake, girl! It wasn’t that good of a kiss.

Can you look me in the eye, and guarantee me that this isn’t all some kind of a flimflam?

This door doesn’t open. She doesn’t come out, and no one goes in.

He must have been someone of great importance. Or he did something VERY naughty.

That happens a lot around here.

They’re led by a woman. What does a woman know?

What do you mean bugs? I hate bugs!

His neck did not break! Oh, I am so sorry. Now we must watch him strangle to death!

Time to close the door.

[fortherpwriters]

Howl’s Moving Castle sentence pack

[stillxshexflies]

fortherpwriters:

“You know he only prays on pretty girls.”

“Looks like a little mouse has lost it’s way.”

“That’s my girl.”

“It’s your life, do something for yourself for once.”

“I’ve got a bad cold. I don’t want you to catch it.”

“I’ve always hated turnips.”

“Curses are tough.”

“Here’s another curse for you: may all your bacon burn.”

“Even the manners are a mess in this house.”

“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t torment my friend.”

“She likes my spark!”

“When you’re old, all you want to do is look at the scenery.”

“He’s wasting all my hot water again.”

“I’ve seen all I can take.”

“I see no point in living if I can’t be beautiful.”

“So, you think you’ve got it bad? I’ve never once been beautiful in my entire life!”

“I’ve had enough of this place!”

“He’s just throwing a tantrum.”

“I made some warm milk, want a sip?”

“I’m such big a coward, all I do is hide.”

“I can’t stand how scared I am.”

“Why do I feel like this isn’t going to work?”

“My talent lies in casting spells, not breaking them.”

“Pull yourself together, isn’t this what you’ve been waiting for?”

“He is selfish and cowardly, and sometimes he is hard to understand. But his intentions are good. He just wants to be free.”

“Now I understand, you’re in love with [name].”

“Now, matter what you do. Don’t look down.”

“Stop! It’s a trap!”

“That was the most fun I’ve had in ages.”

“Don’t try to be cute.”

“This is bad, you’ve gone too far.”

“Seems everyone in this family has problems.”

“This place is gorgeous. Like a dream.”

“You’re scaring me. I have this weird feeling that you’re going to leave.”

“I don’t care that you’re a monster.”

“I’m too old to be treated like this!”

“You’re in love. Don’t deny it, you’ve been sighing all day.”

“We’re a family now.”

“Only idiots believe what they read in the paper.”

“She fed me something gross. I feel sick.”

“Now I’ve got something I want to protect. It’s you.”

“Crazy lady with a shovel!”

“I know how to help you now! Find me in the future!”

“I just can’t seem to stop crying.”

“I know that spell, the kiss from your true love breaks it.”

“A heart is a heavy burden.”

“The one thing you can always count on is that hearts change.”

“The game is over.”

[onceuponamusing]

“it takes a special sort of bravery and even greater naïveté to stay kind in a world made of cruelty.”

— should I pity you, or envy you? | m.a.w (via dvoyd)

[rp-meme-central]

Recovering from injury sentence starters

1. “You’re in no condition to be walking around. Just stay in bed and let me take care of you.” 

2. “This cast is itchy.” 

3. “I think I’m going to go crazy with boredom before my _____ heal(s) enough for me to get out of bed.” 

4. “This is so frustrating! I can’t do anything with my arm in this sling!” 

5. “Want me to sign your cast?” 

6. “Sorry about your ______. But think of it this way: you don’t have to help with the chores until it/they heal(s).” 

7. “No, you can’t come. You need to stay here and heal.” 

8. “I thought a little fresh air would help you/me heal.” 

9. “Need some help? Getting up/down the stairs must be tricky with that/those injured ______.” 

10. “You shouldn’t be moving around so much. You’ll pop your stitches.” 

11. “I can’t believe you’re making me stay here just because I hurt my ______.” 

12. “Back off! Just because I’m hurt doesn’t mean I need you hovering over me all the time.” 

13. “Just because you’re hurt doesn’t mean you need to be so grouchy.” 

14. “Are you still on pain meds? You’re awfully happy for someone with an injured ______.” 

15. “This is embarrassing, but could you help me? I can’t get the bathroom by myself.” 

16. “Don’t even think about trying to walk with that injured leg. If you need something, call me and I’ll do it for you.”  

17. “Good thing I’m a lazy person. Except for the fact that my ______ is/are broken, laying around for a few weeks sounds great.”

18. “I swear, if you try and sneak out before you’re fully healed, I’ll strap you to the bed.” 

19. “What are you doing? Are you trying to make your injury worse?” 

20. “I feel like such a jerk, lying here on the couch while you do all the work. Injured or not, I should be doing something.” 

21. “I can’t believe I have to lay like this until my _____ heal(s). This is so humiliating.”

22. “Once I’m healed, I am never getting injured again. This is all just too inconvenient for a repeat performance.”  

[rp-meme-glaceon]

Send “📂“ for a random yet completely useless headcanon I have

[platonicrpmemes]

Send “Never have I ever ______” to play with my muse.

Remember, your muse must not have done the activity to send it in!

[platonicrpmemes]

Send “You were getting soaked.” for your muse to keep mine dry in a rainstorm without being asked.

[musingmeme-blog]

anastasia (1997) lyric starters .   always feel free to change pronouns  /   wording !

A RUMOR IN ST. PETERSBURG. ❛  my underwear got frozen standing here all week  !    ❜ ❛  thank goodness for the gossip that gets us through the day  !  ❜  ❛  have you heard what they’re saying on the street  ?  ❜ ❛   it’s a rumor  ,   a legend  ,  a mystery  …    ❜ ❛   it could be worth a fortune  !    ❜ ❛   you and i  ,  friend  ,  will go down in history  !    ❜ ❛   who else could pull it off but you and me  ?  ❜ ❛  we’ll be rich  !  ❜ ❛   who knows  ?  ❜ JOURNEY TO THE PAST. ❛   don’t turn back now that we’re here  .  ❜ ❛   life is full of choices  .  ❜ ❛   somewhere down this road  ,  i know someone’s waiting  .    ❜ ❛   i must’ve had them  ,  too  !    ❜ ❛   i will never be complete until i find you  !    ❜ ❛   one step at a time  .  ❜ ❛   who knows where this road may go  !  ❜ ❛   bring me home at last !  ❜ ONCE UPON A DECEMBER. ❛   dancing bears  ,  painted wings  .  ❜ ❛   someone holds me safe and warm  .  ❜ ❛   far away  , long ago  .    ❜ ❛   horses prance through a silver storm  !    ❜ IN THE DARK OF THE NIGHT. ❛   i was tossing and turning  .  ❜ ❛   the nightmare i had was as bad as can be  .  ❜ ❛   it scared me out of my wits  !    ❜ ❛   revenge will be sweet  .    ❜  ❛   i can feel that my powers are slowly returning  !  ❜ ❛   terror’s the least i can do  !    ❜ ❛   soon she will feel that her nightmares are real  !    ❜ ❛   evil will find her  .  ❜ ❛   it’s the end of the line  !    ❜ ❛   she’ll be mine  !    ❜ LEARN TO DO IT. ❛    you were born in a palace by the sea   .  ❜ ❛   could it be  ?  ❜ ❛   we’ve lots and lots to teach you  !    ❜ ❛   shoulders back and stand up tall  .    ❜  ❛   i feel a little foolish  .  .  .  ❜ ❛   what happens now  ?    ❜ ❛   if i can learn to do it  ,  you can learn to do it  .    ❜ ❛   there’s nothing to it  !  ❜ ❛   i never cared for stroganoff  !    ❜ ❛   dessert and then goodnight  ?    ❜ ❛   pull yourself together  !  ❜ ❛   suddenly  ,  i feel like someone new  !    ❜ ❛   you’re a dream come true  !    ❜ LEARN TO DO IT ( REPRISE ). ❛   i see it at a glance   .  ❜ ❛   she’s radiant and confident  .  ❜ ❛   i taught her well  .    ❜ ❛   how could you do this  ?    ❜  ❛   how will we get through this  ?  ❜ ❛   i never should have let them dance  !    ❜ PARIS HOLDS THE KEY. ❛   forget where you’re from   .  ❜ ❛   there’s love in the air  !  ❜ ❛   i’ve found you at last  .    ❜ ❛   you’ll be gone , that’s the end  .    ❜  ❛   you’ll be très jolie and so smart  !  ❜ ❛   come dance through the night  !    ❜ ❛   paris holds the key to her heart  !    ❜ ❛   ooh la la  !  ❜

[musingmeme-blog]

touch meme . send one to do to my muse .

001.   grab their hand .

002.   kiss their cheek .

003.   give massage .

004.   kiss hand .

005.   high five .

006.   cuddle .

007.   cry on . 

008.   shoulder hug .

009.   bear hug .

010.   kiss them .

011.   pinkie promise .

012.   piggy back ride . 

013.  give them food . 

014.   from behind hug . 

015.   fist bump .

[roleplayawesomemes]

Send “Rumor has it...” And a rumor about my muse

[whatxcanxgoxwrong]

STARTER CALL!!

[legendarymemes]

Send ‘❗❗’ to find my muse unconscious.

[beckaleash]

atlantis: the lost empire sentence starters.

it’s just a myth, isn’t it? 

that is where you’d be wrong. 

impossible, you say?

i’ll take your questions now. 

don’t let it happen again! 

well, this is it. i am finally getting out of the dungeon. 

they can’t do this to me! 

i swear, he gets crazier every year. 

if i ever hear that word again, i’ll step in front of a bus!

i have new evidence that– 

we depend on you. 

you have a lot of potential. don’t throw it all away chasing fairytales. 

i can prove it exists! 

how did you get in here? 

i came down the chimney. ho, ho, ho. 

i’m acting on behalf of my employer who has a most intriguing proposition for you. 

are we clear? 

relax. he doesn’t bite… often. 

join me in a little yoga? 

he was crazy as a fruit bat, he was. 

he knew how much i liked my privacy.

i keep a low profile. 

he said if anything were to happen to him, i should give it to you when you were ready. 

i wasn’t born yesterday, son. 

yeah, looks like gibberish to me. 

it’s not gibberish to me.

i will make them believe. 

this is exactly what i wanted to hear. 

i am a man who keeps his word. 

i’m going to the afterlife with a clear conscience. 

if i could bring back just one shred of proof… that’d be enough for me.

don’t like to leave loose ends. 

i’m your man – you will not regret this! 

boy i am so excited, i can’t even hold it in! 

what in the cockadoodle is cilantro? 

i got your four basic food groups – beans, bacon, whiskey, and lard! 

alright, cowboy. pack it up and move it out. 

if you’re looking for the pony rides, they’re back there. 

you dropped your dynamite. 

what else have you, uh, got in there? 

when you settle a bet, you settle a bet. 

he always believed you couldn’t put a price on the pursuit of knowledge. 

this should be enriching for all of us.

you ask too many questions. 

do not be such a crybaby. 

now tell me your story, my little friend.

what have i told you about playing nice with the other kids?

i used to take lunch money from guys like this.

hard to believe he’s still single.

do you want to do my job? be my guest.

we’re getting killed out here!

we have a crisis on our hands. 

we’ve been up this particular creek before… and we’ve always come through, paddle or no paddle. 

from here on in, everyone pulls double duty.

looks like all our chances for survival rest with you. 

we’re all gonna die. 

put out that cigarette.

you didn’t just drink that, did you?

don’t move. don’t breathe. don’t do anything, except pray maybe.

you’re so skinny, if you turned sideways and stuck out your tongue, you’d look like a zipper. 

we’ve been pretty tough on the kid. what do you say we cut him some slack? 

don’t you ever close that book?

relax. we don’t get paid overtime.

sometimes i get a little carried away.

i guess i’m still a little rusty at this.

and now i’m telling you, you don’t wanna know.

i’m gonna kill him.

go back to bed.

alright, who’s not dead?

now don’t everybody jump up at once.

you really came through.they can smell fear just by looking at you.

about time someone hit him.

we come in peace.

someone’s having a good time. 

he’s like a kid at christmas.

this changes everything. 

this changes nothing.

your journey has been in vain.

a thousand years ago, you would have slain them on sight.

we were once a great people. now we live in ruins.

the kings of our past would weep if they could see how far we have fallen.

our way of life is dying.

someone needs to talk to her. someone with good people skills.

i have some questions for you and you are not leaving this city until they are answered.

you are a scholar, are you not? judging from your diminished physique and large forehead, you are suited for nothing else.

you got another question for me?

that’s what i do, that’s my job.

such knowledge has been lost to us.

how was my accent?

that’s an easy thing to miss.

i just wish he could be standing here with me.

we are not thriving. true, our people live, but our culture is dying.

we are like a stone the ocean beats against. with each passing year, a little more of us is worn away.

i have brought you to this place to ask you for your help.

you do swim, do you not?

why don’t you lead the way because i have no idea where we’re going.

what’s… what’s with all the guns? 

i am such an idiot. 

this is just another treasure hunt for you.

i would’ve told you sooner but it was strictly on a need-to-know-basis… and, well. now you know.

i had to be sure you were one of us. 

i’m no mercenary. 

mercenary? i prefer the term “adventure capitalist”.

you don’t know what you’re tampering with.

you take that away, and they’ll die.

if you gave back every stolen artefact from a museum, you’d be left with an empty building. 

we’re just providing a necessary service to the archeological community.

i’ve got to admit, i’m disappointed.

for once, do the smart thing. 

i really hate it when negotiations go sour.

tell them to drop their weapons now!

you’re not applying yourself.

i’d suggest you put a bandage of that bleeding heart of yours.

you don’t have the slightest idea what this power of capable of.

why don’t you translate and i’ll wave the gun around.

no don’t! don’t touch her!

but that’s what it’s all about, right? money.

you’ve read darwin. it’s called natural selection. we’re just helping it along.

we’re all going to die. 

this is wrong and you know it.

we’re this close to our biggest payday ever and you pick now of all times to grow a conscience?!

we’ve done a lot of things we’re not proud of, but nobody got hurt.

i followed you in, and i’ll follow you out.

well, i think we’ve seen how effective my decisions have been.

it’s been my experience that when you hit bottom, the only place left to go is up.

i didn’t say it was the smart thing, but it is the right thing to do.

we better make sure he doesn’t hurt himself.

bring jerky and ammo.

i love it when i win.

don’t get shot.

you told me he only had guns!

less talk, more saw.

looks like somebody’s working overtime.

i really wish i had a better idea than this.

you said we were in this together!

well, i have to hand it to you. you’re a bigger pain in the neck than i would have ever though possible. 

it takes a lot to get under my skin, but congratulations. you just won the solid gold kewpie doll.

if we don’t get out of here, we’ll die.

i only wish there was more we could do for you.

i don’t think the world needs another hero. 

i hear there’s an opening down here for an expert in gibberish.

you take good care of yourself.

let me get this straight… you didn’t find anything?

i’m going to miss that boy.

i hope this piece of proof is enough for you.

[justtoliveonedayarchive]

The Hunchback Notre Dame Sentence Meme

❝Listen, they’re beautiful, no?.❞ ❝Who is this creature?❞ ❝Hush, little one.❞ ❝You there!  What are you hiding?❞ ❝Sanctuary!  Please give us sanctuary!❞ ❝My conscience is clear.❞ ❝What must I do?❞ ❝Our Lord works in mysterious ways.❞ ❝What makes a monster and what makes a man?❞ ❝Will today be the day?❞ ❝Go on. Nobody wants to be cooped up here forever.❞ ❝Well that’s what you get for sleeping with your mouth open.❞ ❝I’d never fit in there. I’m not…normal. ❞ ❝No, the Pope. Of course, you!❞ ❝Life’s not a spectator sport. If watching is all you’re gonna do, then you’re gonna watch your life go by without you.❞ ❝Who says you gotta ask?❞ ❝Better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission.❞   ❝I am your only friend.❞ ❝I am a monster.❞ ❝What I’d give, what I’d dare…❞ ❝If I were in their skin I’d treasure every instant.❞ ❝Just one day, and then I swear I’ll be content.❞ ❝You leave town for a couple of decades and they change everything.❞ ❝Reporting for duty, as ordered, sir.❞ ❝You make your point quite vividly.❞ ❝Everyone is acting crazy.❞ ❝You’re not hurt, are you?  Here, here, let’s see.❞ ❝See, no harm done.  Just try to be a little more careful.❞ ❝Hurry, here’s your chance.❞ ❝You think s/he’s ugly now? Watch this.❞ ❝Don’t be afraid. I’m sorry, this wasn’t supposed to happen.❞   ❝You speak of justice, yet you are cruel to those most in need of your help.❞ ❝I’m free, I’m free!…dangit.❞ ❝What a woman!❞ ❝You sneaky son of a–❞ ❝Are you always this charming, or am I just lucky?❞   ❝I was just imagining a rope around that beautiful neck.❞ ❝What do they have against people who are different, anyway?❞ ❝You can’t right all the wrongs in this world by yourself.❞ ❝I thought we all were children of God.❞ ❝Wait!  I want to talk to you.❞ ❝Got the girls chasing you already!.❞ ❝Did you make all these things yourself?❞ ❝I could stay up here forever.❞ ❝How could such a cruel man/woman/person have raised someone like you?❞   ❝I am a monster, you know.❞ ❝Do you think I’m evil?❞ ❝You helped me.  Now I will help you.❞ ❝This is where I belong.❞ ❝I don’t think I’m his/her type.❞ ❝You know I am a righteous man.❞ ❝It’s not my fault!❞ ❝God have mercy on me.❞ ❝With all due respect, I was not trained to murder the innocent.❞ ❝We always said you were the cute one. ❞ ❝You’ve done so much for me already, my friend, but I must ask your help one more time.❞ ❝Promise you won’t let anything happen to him/her.❞ ❝I think…you’re hiding something.❞ ❝You’ve got a funny way of showing gratitude.❞ ❝I’m tired of trying to be something I’m not.❞ ❝Good, good, good!  Ahhh. Great!…What is it?❞   ❝You’re very clever to have found our hideaway.  Unfortunately, you won’t live to tell the tale.❞ ❝Leave me alone.❞ ❝You’re safe now.❞ ❝You killed her/him.❞ ❝And He shall smite the wicked and plunge them into the fiery pit!❞

[justanotherrpmeme]

Clumsy Starters

[whatxcanxgoxwrong]

*trips over their own feet*

*walks into you*

*accidentally drops _____ on you*

*falls down the stairs*

*treads on your foot*

*accidentally hits you*

"I'm sorry I'm so clumsy"

"Dexterity isn't my strong suit"

"I think I broke _____ "

"I had a disagreement with the floor"

"The step appeared from nowhere"

"You're the clumsiest person I know"

"Are you okay?"

"How did you get that bruise?"

"What've you done this time?"