The loving touch he deserves
Summary
Anthony woke up in the middle of the night to find that his lover was awake. After some coaxing, Asa admits what's keeping him awake, and Anthony gives him what he needs.
Notes
Asa is touch-starved, and Anthony is there for him.
On Ao3
Rating G - 1194 words
Anthony woke up to the sensation of fingers gently stroking his hair.
It was far from the first time he’d woken up next to Asa. Yet, even now, he couldn’t help but feel surprised to have someone in his bed. This was only natural, after all; he had slept in an empty bed for so many years.
Nor was it the first time he’d woken up to find his lover already awake. In fact, it happened far more often than the opposite, whether they were sleeping at Asa’s place or his own. Asa had told him he was a light sleeper and sometimes suffered from insomnia, so Anthony had gotten used to it.
He glanced at the glowing numbers on his alarm clock and saw that it wasn’t time to get up.
Anthony stayed like that for a few more moments, enjoying the feel of Asa’s fingers in his hair and the warmth of his body against his own.
Then he felt his breath against his ear. "I know you’re awake, Anthony."
Anthony turned slowly toward Asa and asked, a little concerned, "Did you sleep at all?"
Asa leaned in and kissed his lover’s forehead. Then, gently brushing Anthony’s hair back, he replied, "Yes, a little. But don't worry about me. You should go back to sleep."
Sensing that something was off from the tone of his lover’s voice, Anthony raised his hand and gently placed it on Asa's cheek. He asked gently, "What was it? A nightmare?"
Asa leaned into Anthony’s hand and shook his head.
Not one to give up easily, Anthony gently stroked his lover’s cheek with his thumb and pressed on. "Come on, Asa. Tell me what’s wrong. You know I won’t be able to fall back asleep if I know something’s bothering you."
"Are you blackmailing me?"
"Are you deflecting the question?"
It was his lover’s favorite tactic to divert attention, but Anthony wasn’t going to let it slide. Seeing Asa’s hesitation, however, and not wanting to make him more uncomfortable, Anthony began to pull his hand away. Against all expectations, Asa stopped him by grabbing his hand and bringing again it to his face.
"Asa?"
Asa immediately let go of Anthony’s hand. Anthony, confused, said softly, "Hey, tell me what’s going on."
Asa swallowed several times, looked away, and finally whispered, "Could you please hold me?"
Despite his quiet voice, Anthony could hear him clearly, and the longing in his lover’s tone nearly broke his heart. No sooner had Asa finished speaking than Anthony wrapped his arms around him, pulled him close, and whispered into his hair, "You don’t even have to ask."
Asa let out a sigh of relief and snuggled closer to Anthony. After a few moments, Anthony asked softly, "Is this okay?"
Asa hummed. Anthony gently stroked his back and kissed his hair from time to time.
They stayed like that for a while until Asa broke the silence.
"Maybe you want an explanation?"
Anthony pressed another kiss onto his lover’s hair.
"Only if you want to tell me about it."
Asa pulled away slightly to see Anthony better, though his lover kept his arms wrapped around him.
"It's just that...it's actually really ridiculous. You know, I told you that I haven't been in a relationship for a long time. At least, not one that involves a lot of displays of affection like between you and me. Not to mention, my mom wasn’t the affectionate type. Ever since I’ve known you, there’s hardly been a night that we haven’t spent together. Tonight, for the first time, I woke up feeling this longing for some kind of contact, some kind of touch."
He laughed self-deprecatingly and added, "It's silly, like I told you."
"It's not silly, neither ridiculous at all. It's not surprising either. After being deprived of physical affection for so long, it’s rather normal for your body to react this way."
"Don’t you find that weird?
"Not at all."
Anthony raised a hand and traced the outline of his lover's face with his fingertips, watching him relax under his touch.
"Do you like that?" Anthony asked, continuing his gentle caresses.
Asa nodded.
"Well, you see, I like doing that, too. May I continue?"
Asa nodded and whispered, "Please..."
Anthony cupped his lover’s face in his hands and tenderly pressed his lips to his in a lingering kiss as he slid his hands down Asa’s back.
Then, pulling back slightly, he gently moved his hands over his lover’s body without pressure, starting from his back and moving up to his shoulders and then along his arms to his hands, intertwining his fingers with his lover’s.
With every caress, every touch, he felt Asa’s body relax a little more.
His lips returned to Asa’s and he whispered softly against his mouth, "Still good?"
Asa nodded, his eyes half-closed and, a look of pure bliss on his face, he breathed out, "Better than good."
Then, Asa ran his tongue, timid yet eager, over his lover’s lips, silently begging for access that desire could no longer hold back. Without hesitation, Anthony kissed him again and, though passion was undeniably present, they chose to push it into the background. They focused solely on the touch of their skin, the brush of their lips, and the shared heat radiating from their pressed bodies.
Asa rested his hands on Anthony’s shoulders, his fingers clenching the fabric of his T-shirt, wanting to pull him closer. Accepting this wordless invite, Anthony pressed closer with infinite tenderness as they continued to kiss over and over in a slow dance. Anthony’s hands resumed their wandering, roaming over Asa’s body and radiating a soothing warmth that he had sorely missed.
Every caress was an affirmation. Every movement of Anthony’s hand on his back or arm answered that longing Asa hadn’t dared to name. He felt seen and accepted in his vulnerability as Anthony continued to give him what he needed.
Much later, Asa lay in his lover’s arms, surrendered and fulfilled. Anthony brushed his hair back and said softly, "Asa, please tell me what you need. Anything, even if you think it’s ridiculous or ugly. I want it all."
"Yes, I'll try. I promise," Asa whispered, too overcome with emotion to speak any louder.
"That's all I ask, my angel."
Asa moved and wrapped his arms around his lover’s neck. He pulled him close and captured his lips in a tender kiss, which expressed, better than words, his gratitude for being understood and accepted.
When they finally pulled apart, Anthony rolled onto his side and pulled Asa in with him. They embraced, their legs tangled in an inseparable knot. Anthony pressed one last kiss to Asa’s forehead. Asa snuggled up against him, nestling his face in the crook of his shoulder and wrapping his hands around his lover’s waist.
Enveloped by Anthony’s warm and comforting embrace, Asa didn't even feel sleep overtake him.
For his part, Anthony felt a wave of tenderness so powerful that it squeezed his heart and he stayed awake until he was certain his beloved was fast asleep, promising himself that he would always give him the loving touch he deserved.
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Still not beta'd (because I want it so)
Still not my native language
Still hoping you'll enjoy this story 🥰
Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝
Ineffable fan fictions Masterpost : here
Asa and Anthony series : here
