Love Letters @wildraccoonstuckinacity - Tumblr Blog

“She wants to know if I love her, that’s all anyone wants from anyone else, not love itself but the knowledge that love is there…”

— Jonathan Safran Foer

anxeious

penumbrapens

My mother’s trust issues are leaking into my chest and I’ve got my father’s nose and his tendency to stop calling back so I’m sorry about the 9 missed calls I have from you and the 6 voicemails I never played I swear I’d love you if I could.

landsccape

expressions-of-nature

Altai Mountains by Sergio

I began to imagine how many millions of people were, at that moment, feeling utterly useless and wretched - how- ever rich, charming and delightful they might be - because they were alone that night, as they were yesterday, and as they might well be tomorrow. Students with no one to go out with, older people sitting in front of the TV as if it were their sole salvation, businessmen in their hotel rooms, wondering if what they were doing made any sense, women who spent the afternoon carefully applying their makeup and doing their hair in order to go to a bar only to pretend that they're not looking for company; all they want is confirmation that they're still attractive; the men ogle them and chat them up, but the women reject them all disdainfully, because they feel inferior and are afraid the men will find out that they're single mothers or lowly clerks with nothing to say about what's going on in the world because they work from dawn to dusk to scrape a living and have no time to read the newspapers. People who look at them- selves in the mirror and think themselves ugly, believing that being beautiful is what really matters, and spend their time reading magazines in which everyone is pretty, rich, and famous. Husbands and wives who wish they could talk over supper as they used to, but there are always other things demanding their attention, more important things, and the conversation can always wait for a tomorrow that never comes.

landsccape

The analogy of Good and Bad as a kid and as an adult

I am disheartened because I did not imagine myself to live in a world which thrives on hatred. I am disappointed because never in my darkest dreams as a child did I ever think that the world will watch a live genocide on their screens everyday for months without doing anything to stop it. I am terrified because all the power seems to be in the wrong hands. I am conflicted because we have normalised belittling cultures and communities different from our own.

I have grown up in a country which holds diversity in her heart like no other. A country which has taught me what difference means and how it can be embraced. My family has taught me to be one with all of humanity- And I have always taken immense pride in all the places I have visited in my country - because more than the place itself, the people have won my heart. Their kindness has penetrated my soul.

As a child I knew that there are good people and there are bad people. And I had this wild take about the world that good people are always more than bad people. And the good people will never let the bad people triumph at any cost. But it's such a pity that the vision my younger self had about the world has been destroyed. I am convinced that there are more bad people than good people now. I live in a society where we have made God's out of the bad people - and the good people continue to be trampled under their tyrannical religion.

A child's dreams are very simple. They hope that the world will be a loving place to live in as they grow up. But I don't know how many dreams have we have blooded red with our own hands. As an adult - I am deeply disturbed that the world I dreamt of as a kid doesn't exist. My heart goes out to all the kids in the world right now , because I feel we have failed to integrate the values of love and brotherhood in the society we are going to leave behind for them. We have failed ourselves because we thought we could right all the wrongs of our ancestors - but it's man's greatest tragedy that he never learns anything from the civilizations gone by.

Playing this song takes me back to my 13-year-old self, reminiscing about the good old days when life was all about new crushes and friendships that felt like they'd last forever. I'd pedal my bicycle, the wind blowing through my hair, dancing to the lyrics of Steal My Girl in my mind. ( now i only use my mind to over think) ..It feels like that was the last time I truly felt alive. This song specifically talks about the age 16. I had dreamt of being 16 since I was 13 and well, 16 was- uhm. Awful I guess? I don't even remember.

Back then, there was no need to plan meetups with friends because we saw each other every day. We'd groove to One Direction and Taylor Swift tunes, while I listened in as my friends ranted about their favourite Wattpad novels. Even though I wasn't much of a reader, I decided to dive in, and suddenly, Hardin Scott became my favorite red-flag fantasy man.

Listening to these songs , I would visualize a grand future awaiting me – long road trips and sunsets on the beach, all seen through rose-tinted glasses reflecting the light of the setting sun. I loved imagining myself as a lively adult- roaring parties and experiencing endless, unrealistic romance, perhaps influenced by my obsession with playing episodes all day.

My teen life wasn't all that great but I still dreamt of having the time of my life at 18- starting college, meeting 'amazing' new people because 18 was associated with everything good and shining. Everyone seemed to have everything fixed as soon as they left school, at least that's what I thought. So even i held onto the hope that once I leave school- i am going to be the person i have always wanted to be. You know the roaring parties and long drives, the lively, 'happening' me ? Yeah that. Currently I am 19 and I'm pushing that fantasy to 25. Yup. Sounds good.

"She shined so bright..and then there was me, who has always lived his life in a dark tunnel. I finally found my light.I think I am finally standing at the end of the dark tunnel." - vi