A Poison of the Mind.

[ [ Fandomless Multi-Muse RP Blog ] ]

[with-dark-intentions-blog]

New modern Dracula OCs to come?

[with-dark-intentions-blog]

Londonintherain > with-dark-intentions

Very edgy I know. Sorry heh.

[with-dark-intentions-blog]

[ [ This account is getting a revamp and maybe a new name soon. My data is slow but once it picks up, I'll be able to change more stuff.

Will keep you posted.

For now I think I'm just going to change my icon and header seeing as this blog isn't just for BBC Sherlock OCs anymore. ] ]

[asteriananthologies-a-blog]

“I know you are, but you don’t need to be; you, Frazer, have nothing to apologise for.” Xan had not said a word for hours, she hadn’t wanted to interrupt him while he was talking and telling her all of these things, but she spoke now to reassure him. Wary of hurting him further, she didn’t try to hug or even touch him, she just let her hand fall from her lap, so that he could take it if he wished to. “I don’t hate you, I could never hate you, my fucking father on the other hand …” 

Her other hand sprang up to cover her mouth. She could not believe that she had just spoken about Jim that way, in that tone. But if what Frazer had told her was true, she reasoned, trying to rid herself of the guilt it had caused, he would have deserved it. And she didn’t think for a single second that Frazer was lying. “He can’t keep doing this. He can’t keep getting away with doing it: sitting in the centre of his fucking web, and playing puppet master with people, like he’s got them all dangling on his strings. He just can’t.” Whether she cared to admit it or not, that’s what he’d been doing to her all her life, but now he’d started on Frazer … Now it was time to take a stand. 

“We- We have to go. We- We- We have to- We- We have to get out of here. Now. There’s no time to waste, he’s out of the city until later tonight, if we go now we get a head start and then maybe he won’t find us. Maybe.” The dread weight of certainty settled on her chest, filling her with panic once again: if they stayed, they would die, one way or another, they would both end up dead, slain by James Moriarty’s hand; if they left, they had a chance, however slim, to survive. 

And right now, looking at Frazer, who was all beaten and bruised, a broken man, Xan knew that she would battle any odds to get him to safety. “He’s wanted shot of me for a long time anyway, so we might as well try it, eh?” 

[with-dark-intentions-blog]

The man smiled at her sadly. "D-D-Don't worry." He soothed. "I'll be w-with-with you all the way, all-alright?" He picked up her hand entwining his little finger with hers. "P-P-Promise." He let go of her hand. "Come on. We- We'll go pack. It's late. May-Maybe he's in the off-office and not home and if not;" a dark grin spread on Frazer's face. Something that just didn't seem right on his face. "Then all the better that the bastard watches it all burn." He chuckled, stammer gone once again; thinking too much about paying Jim back for all the shit he made Xandra and himself endure over the years to even notice his stammer.

Frazer wasn't himself anymore. He was different. He wasn't sure if he should have shown this side of himself to Xan so soon but sooner or later she'd witness what Declan Hart made of the stuttering curly haired man.

[thegoodvybe]

[asteriananthologies-a-blog]

“I know you are, but you don’t need to be; you, Frazer, have nothing to apologise for.” Xan had not said a word for hours, she hadn’t wanted to interrupt him while he was talking and telling her all of these things, but she spoke now to reassure him. Wary of hurting him further, she didn’t try to hug or even touch him, she just let her hand fall from her lap, so that he could take it if he wished to. “I don’t hate you, I could never hate you, my fucking father on the other hand …” 

Her other hand sprang up to cover her mouth. She could not believe that she had just spoken about Jim that way, in that tone. But if what Frazer had told her was true, she reasoned, trying to rid herself of the guilt it had caused, he would have deserved it. And she didn’t think for a single second that Frazer was lying. “He can’t keep doing this. He can’t keep getting away with doing it: sitting in the centre of his fucking web, and playing puppet master with people, like he’s got them all dangling on his strings. He just can’t.” Whether she cared to admit it or not, that’s what he’d been doing to her all her life, but now he’d started on Frazer … Now it was time to take a stand. 

“We- We have to go. We- We- We have to- We- We have to get out of here. Now. There’s no time to waste, he’s out of the city until later tonight, if we go now we get a head start and then maybe he won’t find us. Maybe.” The dread weight of certainty settled on her chest, filling her with panic once again: if they stayed, they would die, one way or another, they would both end up dead, slain by James Moriarty’s hand; if they left, they had a chance, however slim, to survive. 

And right now, looking at Frazer, who was all beaten and bruised, a broken man, Xan knew that she would battle any odds to get him to safety. “He’s wanted shot of me for a long time anyway, so we might as well try it, eh?” 

[with-dark-intentions-blog]

He helped her pull him up, pushing himself up off the tiles with his legs as he held her hand. Frazer listened to what Alexandra had to say. He raised his eyebrows at her when she started defending Jim in a way to tell her that she was doing it again. It must be hard for her not to. It wouldn't be something she could stop doing with a click of her fingers. It would be a process and Frazer would help in any way he could.

His black messy curls bounced as he nodded in agreement. "I suggest we- we start off e-e-ee-easy enough." Frazer pondered. "If-If-If we head in f-f-ff-full force straight a-a-away; J-Jim w-w-would ha-ha-have us dead in sec-seconds." And Frazer didn't want Xan to die, or worse. "We-W-W-We should burn our old r-r-rooms. A s-s-sign to J-J-Jim that his chapter of ter-ter-terror in our lives is over. Aa-and we should burn the c-c-cars too j-just because we can."

His heart was beating with excitement. Finally. This could be it, this could be the moment Xan could break free. He smiled at her and now grabbed both hands. "A-A-Are you willing to do this with me, Xan? Are you ready?"

[rpmemeswagon]

                         * . ✧ THE CRUEL PRINCE ✧ . *

                                                 - STARTERS -

❝ If I cannot be better than them, I will become so much worse. ❞ ❝ Most of all, I hate you because I think of you. Often. ❞ ❝ What could I become if I stopped worrying about death, about pain, about anything? ❞ ❝ Instead of being afraid, I could become something to fear. ❞ ❝ I can be charming. I charmed you, didn’t I? ❞ ❝ Do not expect others to share my depraved tastes. ❞ ❝ If you hurt me, I wouldn’t cry. I would hurt you back. ❞ ❝ I am going to keep on defying you. ❞ ❝ I promise you this is the least of what I can do. ❞ ❝ Let’s have a toast. To the incompetence of our enemies. ❞ ❝ I want to be part of the unfolding of the tale. ❞ ❝ Father, I am what you made me. ❞ ❝ Have I told you how hideous you look tonight? ❞ ❝ I will not stand in front of your happiness. I will not even stand in front of misery that you choose for yourself. ❞ ❝ I suppose I could love anyone. ❞ ❝ He’s flint, you’re tinder. ❞ ❝ There’s always something left to lose. ❞ ❝ How has the night been going for you? ❞ ❝ I am tired of caring. ❞ ❝ This is what you wanted, isn’t it? What you sacrificed everything for. Go on. It’s all yours. ❞ ❝ We don’t need to be good. But let’s try to be fair. ❞ ❝ Desire is an odd thing. As soon as it’s sated, it transmutes. ❞ ❝ I am weak. I am fragile. I am mortal. ❞ ❝ Yes, they frighten me, but I have always been scared, since the day I got here. ❞ ❝ This is absurd. This is awful. ❞ ❝ Only idiots aren’t scared of things that are scary. ❞ ❝ There’s safety in being awful. ❞ ❝ Show your power by appearing powerless. ❞ ❝ I like for things to happen, for stories to unfold. And if I can’t find a good enough story, I make one. ❞ ❝ I get why he chose her. I just wish she had chosen me. ❞ ❝ And yet, I don’t regret it now. ❞ ❝ What if the way I am is the way I am? What if, when everything else is different, I’m not? ❞ ❝ Go ahead. Insult me. ❞ ❝ So you’re going to say something nice? I don’t think so. ❞ ❝ It’s funny how you get under his skin. ❞ ❝ No one else bothers him quite the way that you do. ❞ ❝ The odd thing about ambition is this: You can acquire it like a fever, but it is not so easy to shed. ❞ ❝ Harden your heart. ❞ ❝ I am coming unraveled. I am coming undone. ❞ ❝ We may not die from age, but we grow weary with it. ❞ ❝ Love is a noble cause. ❞ ❝ No one expects us to have any honor. Everyone knows we lie. ❞ ❝ I want to win. I do not yearn to be their equal. In my heart, I yearn to best them. ❞ ❝ I have no marketable skills other than swinging around a sword and making up riddles, neither of which probably pay all that well. ❞ ❝ Maybe I am making all the wrong choices.   ❞ ❝ You think I don’t deserve him. ❞ ❝ I think you’re perfect for each other. ❞ ❝ My real skill lies in pissing people off. ❞ ❝ I am no murderer. ❞ ❝ You are nothing. You barely exist at all. ❞ ❝ He’s wrong about me. ❞ ❝ I do not understand why he likes me, but it is exciting to be liked. ❞ ❝ You really do want me. ❞ ❝ A lady of mystery! My very favorite kind. ❞ ❝ I hate him more than all the others. ❞

[asteriananthologies-a-blog]

“I know you are, but you don’t need to be; you, Frazer, have nothing to apologise for.” Xan had not said a word for hours, she hadn’t wanted to interrupt him while he was talking and telling her all of these things, but she spoke now to reassure him. Wary of hurting him further, she didn’t try to hug or even touch him, she just let her hand fall from her lap, so that he could take it if he wished to. “I don’t hate you, I could never hate you, my fucking father on the other hand …” 

Her other hand sprang up to cover her mouth. She could not believe that she had just spoken about Jim that way, in that tone. But if what Frazer had told her was true, she reasoned, trying to rid herself of the guilt it had caused, he would have deserved it. And she didn’t think for a single second that Frazer was lying. “He can’t keep doing this. He can’t keep getting away with doing it: sitting in the centre of his fucking web, and playing puppet master with people, like he’s got them all dangling on his strings. He just can’t.” Whether she cared to admit it or not, that’s what he’d been doing to her all her life, but now he’d started on Frazer … Now it was time to take a stand. 

“We- We have to go. We- We- We have to- We- We have to get out of here. Now. There’s no time to waste, he’s out of the city until later tonight, if we go now we get a head start and then maybe he won’t find us. Maybe.” The dread weight of certainty settled on her chest, filling her with panic once again: if they stayed, they would die, one way or another, they would both end up dead, slain by James Moriarty’s hand; if they left, they had a chance, however slim, to survive. 

And right now, looking at Frazer, who was all beaten and bruised, a broken man, Xan knew that she would battle any odds to get him to safety. “He’s wanted shot of me for a long time anyway, so we might as well try it, eh?” 

[with-dark-intentions-blog]

Frazer noticed Xan's hand but didn't touch it, instead he just looked up at the statue as he tried not to cry. He was angry at himself for crying over such stupid things. Though was that him talking or the him Declan made?

Frazer wiped his eyes and nodded. "Oh w-w-we'll take a stand alright." Frazer chuckled. "While I was with Dec-Dec-Declan; I found a-a new love for-for arson." He grinned to himself and at his idea. "We'll leave. But not b-b-before we give J-Jim a taste of- of what he turned us into."

He finally took Xan's hand. "N-N-No one will fuck with us anymore. This is-is-is our t-time, and n-n-no manipulative asshole is going to w-w-walk all over us again."

[97dr-deactivated20181220]

I just want to cuddle and watch horror movies.

[bebemoon]

my god, please treat those around you gently 

[musingmemes]

hospital themed starters

“ stop messing with your IV. ”

“ hey there - you gave me quite a scare. ”

“ this IV itches. ”

“ i think my nurse is trying to kill me. ”

“ i don’t want to have another surgery. ”

“ i’m tired of laying here in this stupid bed. ”

“ this medicine makes me feel so out of it. ”

“ i just want to go home. ”

“ i’m not leaving this room. ”

“ i feel so tired all the time. ”

“ i’m pretty sure this place is haunted. ”

“ i keep telling them i’m fine. i can go home! ”

“ you’re not fine. you need to rest. ”

“ it’s just a few more days, then i’ll take you home. ”

“ will you stop playing with the bed settings? ”

“ they said i might need another surgery. ”

“ the doctor said it could be worse. ”

“ the doctors are still running some tests. ”

[enfin-reveiller-blog]

[cybercrimer]

due to personal reasons I will be committing crimes

[asteriananthologies-a-blog]

“He doesn’t cage me, he-” Even when she was in that state, it seemed that Alexandra’s first instinct was to defend her father, but, having been distracted by the rest of Frazer’s speech, she never quite managed to finish her sentence. “Trained? What do you mean he ‘trained’ you, Fraze? What- When?” she asked instead. “I don’t- I- I don’t- I don’t understand.”

She’d stopped crying, and had shuffled herself into a sitting position so that her back rested against the front of one of the pews, but her chest was still spasming out of control; she was struggling to catch her breath, or to calm herself down. “Will you please sit by me and explain?” She was shaking far too violently to be able to stand, and looking up at him for too long would just put a crick in her neck, so she patted the space beside her by way of further invite, and then quickly withdrew her hand. “I’m sorry I threw that book at you, I just- No. No, no, do you know what, there’s no excuse. I shouldn’t have done it and I really am very sorry. Please forgive me?” Her eyes, big and brown and brilliant, were wide with a second, silent plea for mercy.

“You’ve just been through something terrible.” That wasn’t a question; she had felt it when she had first held him in her arms, and she could see it now in his eyes. “I should have been more gentle with you. More patient. More kind. But I can’t help you properly until I know what’s happened. Until I understand it. So please, Frazer, I’m sorry, but I need you to tell me: what’s been going on, where have you been for the last six months, and what does my father have to do with any of this? Please, please, I get that it’s hard, but I really, really do need to know …”

[with-dark-intentions-blog]

Oh fuck. It slipped out. Frazer grimaced at his stupidity. He shouldn't have said that and now he'll have to tell Xan everything and it will just hurt her even more. The curly haired mess of a man sighed and walked over to his love; slumping down onto the ground beside her. He took his time, trying to put words together. To soften the blow. But would it really soften it, or just hurt Xan more? She had a knack for knowing when Frazer was lying and well, after what just happened; she deserved to be told the truth.

Frazer pulled his knees up to his chest, looking at the statues in front of them as he talked. He told Xan about the conversation with Jim. How the consulting criminal said it was Frazer's time to be fixed and that if he ever wanted Jim to respect him and let Frazer work for him then this was the only option. Frazer agreed not realizing the consequences and how immediate was exactly that, immediate. "R-Re-Remeber our last meal, be-before I dis-dissappeared?" He recalled. "Why we argued? M-M-Mr- I mean J-Jim, planned it. He-he wanted you to g-get angry with m-m-m-me so you wouldn't real-realize what was going on and I-I left as soon as you turned y-y-your back on me and st-stormed up t-t-to your room. Jim knew that i-if I got you angry, y-y-you wouldn't want to see-see me for the rest of the n-night..." Frazer told Xan that he never meant to hurt her but he had to, and in his mind; he would have rathered see her feel that pain than her knowing exactly what was going on.

He was whisked away that night where he spent a relentless six months with Declan Hart. He was being broken mentally and physically. Starved for days on end, his back burned any time he stuttered to condition him into associating stuttering with pain. "Th-th-this is the first time I've stuttered since-since I left you. I-I-I don't know why it kicked in b-b-b-but it did."

Frazer didnt leave anything out, telling Xan about all the dark, twisted things Declan had done to him and what he also made Frazer do. How he turned Frazer into a monster and how even though he was different, he still wasnt sure what made him be the same old Frazer around Xan.

Declan found Frazer was molded enough into the perfect little soldier for Moriarty and decided to let him go. Frazer stole his old phone from Declan's office hence bringing Xan up to date on everything that happened.

"I'm sorry I left. I-I should have known b-b-better. I sh-should have known what I was getting into. Jim wanted to change me n-n-not just to help him b-b-but to be so-so different that y-you'd hate me even more than you d-d-d-did the night I left." His fist curled, rage bubbling at the thought of Jim. "I hate that dirty bastard." He growled. "He-He-" Frazer stopped in his tracks. Paper jam. He was so tried from all the talking and stammering he did for the three hours he sat there with Xan and told her everything.

His eyes began to water, as frustration, pain and all these other emotions swirled in his head. "I'm- I-I'm sorry..." he croaked weakly.

[rpmemestm]

LATE NIGHT SENTENCE STARTERS

‘  just kiss me.  ‘ ‘  please..  ‘ ‘  i need you.  ‘ ‘  don’t make me say it.  ‘ ‘  you’re shaking.  ‘ ‘  i’m shaking.  ‘ ‘  touch me.  ‘ ‘  i need to feel you.  ‘ ‘  you’re so beautiful/handsome..  ‘ ‘  don’t leave.  ‘ ‘  i don’t deserve you.  ‘ ‘  you should go..  ‘ ‘  i just need to feel something.  ‘ ‘  let me in..  ‘

[with-dark-intentions-blog]

Won't be making much replies today but for now maybe like for a starter and let me know which muse?

From top to bottom:

Frazer Hemlock

Raymond Holt (not actual fc text me if you want to see his real fc)

Mona Krause

Miyoko Hirose

[a-night-like--this]

𝔗𝔥𝔢 ℭ𝔲𝔯𝔢 live, 1996