RP Memes and Other Nonesense

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Calam Lynch in the Ride or Die Trailer

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Send in 🧅 and I will make a meme of your muse(s) as an Onion headline a la this meme

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Operation Mincemeat – Act As If – RP Starters

RP prompts from Act As If, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warnings for: mentions of war, references to alcohol

You just need to be more deceiving.

Act as if you do when you don’t

Act as if you will when you won’t

I don’t follow

We’ll win, sure enough.

[Name], you genius, I know you’ve got this down.

Yes sir, of course sir, I’ll give it my best shot

Oh God, what an idiot

I mean really, it’s not that bloody complex

The man’s a complete fool

Yes, I lied.

When you need a moron to tackle a task, you call him a genius and he'll do what you ask

He may sound dramatic, but at least they’ll think we’re panicked

Should you really be taking that?

Unless I’m very much mistaken, that’s the rules

[Name], the rules are but a trifling inconvenience and they don’t apply to us

You should know, you’re a genius

It’s do or die

You’re a maverick, you mustn’t be held down

Now spill the beans

Shall we get another round?

I’ve probably had enough.

Nonesense! One more for the road.

The night is young

I want to hear all that you know

There’ll be some spies who I need to lie to

He’s in a nest full of vipers

I’m beginning to fear someone here’s not what they appear

We must retrieve them

The enemy can’t see them

If [name]’s deceiving, [they] must have a reason

Come on, man. Have some faith

I’d probably start praying if I were you

If this fails, then it’s down to you two

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Operation Mincemeat – Just For Tonight – RP Starters

RP prompts from Just For Tonight, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warnings for: mentions of war, references to alcohol

When the world is such a mess, it’s hard not to feel depressed

Life is much more pleasant when you’re living in the present

Let’s raise another glass and feel sublime

We broke the law a bit

Just for tonight, let’s be winners

Tomorrow it could all go wrong

Oh, [name], why do all this fretting?

Read the room!

It’s no life if you’re forgetting to live

I find it helps me feel prepared

Give yourself some credit where there’s credit due

Celebrate your greatness!

Grab a gin!

Let’s grab another bottle

I’m not sure that’s me

Let’s live it up tonight!

Victory’s so close we can taste it

Trust me, [name], there’s no point living if we can’t go down swinging

We’re off to dance until we bleed

Excuse me, I’m meant to meet my brother here

We don’t have a choice

We’re under direct orders

Drink up, let’s get delirious

We’re braving danger and death

Gentlemen, we have a problem

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Operation Mincemeat – Dear Bill – RP Starters

RP prompts from Dear Bill, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warning for mentions of war.

You know how she feels about bridge night

It’s been a few days

Next door’s greyhound came into the garden this morning

I think he likes the roses

I used some twine to tie them up and reign them in

Talking to roses is mad and you know that

Why did we meet in the middle of a war?

What a silly thing for anyone to do

Your mother is the same as ever

[name]’s piano is getting much better

It’s been a long summer

She wants to be perfect

It’s nice to see her get better with time

I’m not going to argue with that

I’m trying my best to write everything down

It’ll be like you’ve never been gone

You can’t just miss out on the songs

I’ve tried all the tricks that you put in your note

I’ve watered the soil ‘til it started to float

There’s something you have that I just don’t have

It’s just frustrating for you to be right

It’s good to hear you, even just in my head

I’m stuck here and you’re there

I suppose I just miss you

Even now, I still miss you

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Operation Mincemeat – The Pitch – RP Starters

RP prompts from The Pitch, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warning for mentions of war.

Try again, here we go!

We are gathered here today to present our plan

It’s a genius scheme

Picture the scene

You can do this, [name]

Yes, I get the gist

If you get what we’re saying

I know the suspense is killing ya

Relax and we’ll tell you all that you need to know

Was that clear?

They’ll do background checks

You know, I’m pleased we met

You need me here to pick up the slack

If we could maybe get back on track

You wanted bold ideas

This is your chance

To win the fight it must be watertight

Fine, you have your orders

Now go

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Operation Mincemeat – All the Ladies – RP Starters

RP prompts from All the Ladies, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warning for mentions of war.

When I was a girl they thought I was crazy

I wasn’t gagging for a man or a baby

Okay, guess it’s a no-go

Wait a minute

What’s that sound?

There’s a war to be won

It’s plain to see the way to get from A to Z

Let’s go roll up our sleeves

This conflict’s our best opportunity yet

Now the coast is clear and it’s time to move on up

What on Earth is all this noise?

Just be sensible, for goodness’ sake

Language, if you please

If there’s a job going spare, I’ll take it

We’re not gonna back down now, are we?

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Operation Mincemeat – Dead in the Water – RP Starters

RP prompts from Dead in the Water, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warning for mentions of war.

If I had a touch of that courage, I'd be marching my way through that door

It’s part of my biology to start with an apology

“Sorry” won’t win us this war

If only things were different

If only I was different

I wish I was a maggot

I wish I was a tadpole

One day I’ll metamorphosize

And thus ends the wretched old routine

They’ll hear all these ideas of mine and realise there’s more to me

Wait – maybe I should think big

Don’t be ridiculous, this is a problem

I wish that I could change my life

I’m back, dead in the water again

Maybe I’ll just pop it in the tray

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Operation Mincemeat – Making a Man – RP Starters

RP prompts from Making a Man, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warning for mentions of war.

He has so many astounding attributes

He’s noble and courageous

He looks excellent in suits

These are the ingredients you need

The nation’s in need of a marvellous man

[name], this is a secret mission

We can’t go raising any suspicion

Luckily, I know the perfect man to help us hatch this plan

Take a look, I’ve quite the repertoire

Well, come inside and see

He had such a taste for finery

Only the best for [name]

We’ve got a lot to do

That’s a bloody good question

I forgot what I said

It’s a top-secret shipment, it’s need-to-know

The whole file is missing

It’ll turn up

[name], that file is confidential

If we lost it, we could get into serious trouble

Don’t be so narrow-minded

Stop fretting about guidelines and rules

Regulations are for cowards and fools

No, no, please don’t make me see that man again!

This is the most secure building in England

There’s no way he can find us here

Look what fate has landed in our lap

Really makes you wonder about the security in this building, doesn’t it?

The things I do for this country…

Do you really think you’re working independently?

The notion that you're more than a drop in the ocean of the hundred plans I have in motion is enough to earn demotion

Please stop acting like I don’t know what to do!

You’re making a mockery of this whole damn operation!

Well, you’re making it difficult to be sensible!

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Operation Mincemeat – God That’s Brilliant – RP Starters

RP prompts from God That’s Brilliant, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warning for mentions of war.

We take out a porter that no one will miss

God, that’s brilliant, but listen to this

I’ve designed a new kind of missile

It’s full of airborne sedative

One whiff’s enough to floor ten grown men

Our pursuit will be fruitful

What the hell happens then?

But I haven’t got to the exploding socks yet!

I know a lady assassin

She’s killed half of Moscow

She owns her own crossbow

All that we need is a swanky tuxedo

Stop going on about your bloody novels

Your mother doesn’t count

It’s time for ambition

Time to show you’ve got vision

I do love it when the ladies want to kiss me

I’ve even got a catchphrase for him

Our victory’s assured

God that’s brilliant

Now listen to this

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Operation Mincemeat - Born to Lead - RP starters

RP prompts from Born to Lead, from the musical, Operation Mincemeat. Feel free to tweak as you see fit. Content warning for mentions of war.

We’ll all stay nice and dry

Some were born to follow, but we were born to lead

You’re sure to save the nation

Who needs guns when you’ve got brains?

The feeling was quite magical

It’s still my proudest moment

New to MI5, are you?

I’ve worked here for six years

You’re drinking out of my mug

It has my face on it

We know who to call if there’s a fish mishap

Better keep your eyes on this chap

If the muscle-men can’t do it, call the masters of deceit

Watch out, the big boss is here

Or, at least, that’s what the enemy is going to think

Ah, a misdirection!

We need a way to reduce the danger

Gotta proceed with some dishonesty

Find me a strategy

So we’ve got to lie

This plan is strictly need to know

What this country needs is a genius plan

What this country needs is a genius man

It’s war

It’s not a game

There’s no applause or fame for us

But we were born to lead

I’ll definitely get a knighthood

Look up victory in the dictionary, there’s a picture there of me

We’re the finest minds in England