WonderLantern

Fuck JKR and anyone else who doesn't let people be themselves

[cookiesketches]

how unfortunate

[gracque]

started rewatching asoue. don’t worry guys, i’m pretty sure it’ll work out well this time.

[wrongitsablog]

[victorsqualor]

some asoue trading cards i found using the wayback machine on lemonysnicket.com :)

[castieartfort]

The train scene only in the movie but I drew one of the frames

[wrongitsablog]

count olaf ass tweet

[virginian-wolfsnake]

thinking about josephine. I don’t think I ever fully appreciated just how unbelievably tragic she is before rereading tww. once-formidable josephine, who nevertheless lemony knew as someone who was quite “careful” — so perhaps brave, but never reckless, always somewhat calculating danger — rendered totally paralysed by fear after her husband’s tragic death, which showed her the fragility of life and the real fact of her own mortality. josephine who grew up exploring lake lachrymose, knew all its beaches and islands and caves, but cannot even bear to stand on the shore when she gets older because of what happened to ike. josephine who would once have been the kind of woman who would have protected the baudelaires at all costs, and is reduced to the kind of woman who would rather hide in a cave all her life and, if necessary, hand the children over to a terrible man despite knowing the danger it would put them in. losing ike really ruined the rest of her life and acted as the catalyst that made her so painfully afraid of things she had once loved. like ouch

[augustblogust]

oops a sketch got carried away. i don’t work with text ever and i think you can tell

[i-like-batfam]

Bruce understands that the robins will struggle to keep their secret identity more than he does with their friends and socializing. So he needs a contingency plan so if someone finds out they're robin, they won't suspect Bruce is batman.

Cue Brucie being the most overprotective parent ever.

He insists Dick is scared of heights. Dick will be swinging on a chandelier, showing off his skills while Brucie is running in circles under him, with his arms out, screaming "don't worry, baby! Daddy will catch you!". He's clinging Dick to his chest, whispering reassurances to him, while Dick is smiling, soaking up all the praise.

Pretty soon the adults are telling Dick off, "you're gonna give your father a heart attack one of these days".

It's 100% worse with Tim. After losing Jason, the 'Batman who's fine with bringing a kid to fight serial killers' is a lot more of an act than the 'Bruce Wayne who will die from heartbreak if his kid has so much as a scratch on him'. Tim accidentally got hit with a basketball one day in school and all hell broke loose in the principals office. It doesn't matter if that was 1% of the pain Tim feels during any training session or fight. That's his baby boy's precious face.

[loonstar4477]

Imagine if Jason’s Identity as Red Hood being leaked and for Jason in his personal life it doesn’t affect him as much as mich as the others bc he doesn’t really have a civilian job anyway.

His biggest problem is publicly hiding it from Brucie.

Especially since the entirety of Gotham seems to try to help him. So now he HAS to make public appearances.

Nobody connects Jason/Red Hood to the rest of the Wayne family. Jason was presumed dead and probably meet Batman while figuring out who he was and got trained by the hero. It makes sense. BUT they HAVE to protect Brucie from knowing his son is throwing himself into danger every night.

Sometimes while giving Jason looks of pity or of judgement.

[robs-your-robins]

Ever think Bruce gets sick of the social circle of Gotham, because he's tired af and they can be so ungrateful at times. Honestly, he'd rather save the common man than a fellow billionaire.

Wife of Banker: -and yes, I know that Batman caught him but the impact tore off of the sleeve of his Gucci suit and then set him down on a wet street in Burnside of all places! The nerve of that man. If we knew who he was, we would send him a dry cleaning bill.

Bruce: Maybe Batman should have let your husband pancake on the concrete. Would have saved you the dry cleaning costs.

Wife of Banker:

Bruce: Or, maybe just for kicks, maybe your husband shouldn't have defrauded all those small businesses and pissed off the Penguin. Just a thought.

[imtired-likerllytired]

27yro Bruce travels to the future, meets Nightwing and immediately goes. Oh no. Dicks dead and this is his father. I can’t believe I could live in a world without Dick Grayson I’m gonna kms

And Dick doesn’t explain it bc he’s experiencing the horrors of realizing HOW much like John Grayson he looks like (he has his mamas eyes tho too bad Bruce can’t see em bc Nightwing mask)

Anyway once other people (Tim, Jason, Damian, Steph, himself, Cass etc) explain that Nightwing is in fact not John Grayson

Bruce goes “okay so where is Dick”

And everyone lowkey expected the worlds greatest detective to clock this

Man who looks like his sons dad is probably his son grown up seeing as we are in the future

And like Someone caves and points at Nightwing and Bruce takes one look and goes

“No”

And Dick is now experiencing the horrors squared and about go to on an absolutely biblical rage rant

“No he’s too big”

“…what”

“My boy is small that man there is too big”

5’11 with insoles Dick Grayson who has never managed to bulk up ever bc he’s a whore for cardio (acrobatics)

“Bruce we are in the future”

“Yes yes I am aware but Dick is small”

Other Bruce (45yro): Dick take off your mask

Anyway

27yo Bruce not like clocking that his son will one day grow older and get bigger and like move out and get a job and married and have a family outside of himself and work outside of the dynamic duo

27yro Bruce who like knows how aging works objectively but went “pshhh yeah but not MY BOY”

Anyway yeah

[icaffs]

Bruce: how was your day at school

Jason: some kid at school called me a homo I thought it meant homeless

Bruce:

Jason: I replied with no shit

Bruce: honey, no

[scarlett-reader]

Dick: WAIT B! PLEASE DON'T LOOK AT MY LAPTOP!

Bruce: Why?

Dick: I'm... an adult. And I do... adult things on there...

Bruce: This is a buzzfeed quiz?

Dick, Forcefully shutting laptop: WHICH DISNEY PRINCESS I AM IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

[eevee-the-cat]

Superman: wait so does your kid know you’re Batman?

Batman: *grumbling* he’s very aware.

Superman: and…?

Batman: the only thing he asked me was if I knew Superman…

Superman: *laughing* no way. No way. I can’t believe I’m Batman’s kid’s favorite superhero.

Batman: I’m never telling you anything ever again.

Superman: this might be the best day of my life.

Batman: you know what, I hope when you have a kid, they insist on having Bat logos plastered all over their room.

Superman: wait, is my family crest just everywhere in your house?

Batman: …we’re getting off topic…

Aka, when Clark finds out Dick is a major Superman fan.

[i-like-batfam]

Bruce understands that the robins will struggle to keep their secret identity more than he does with their friends and socializing. So he needs a contingency plan so if someone finds out they're robin, they won't suspect Bruce is batman.

Cue Brucie being the most overprotective parent ever.

He insists Dick is scared of heights. Dick will be swinging on a chandelier, showing off his skills while Brucie is running in circles under him, with his arms out, screaming "don't worry, baby! Daddy will catch you!". He's clinging Dick to his chest, whispering reassurances to him, while Dick is smiling, soaking up all the praise.

Pretty soon the adults are telling Dick off, "you're gonna give your father a heart attack one of these days".

It's 100% worse with Tim. After losing Jason, the 'Batman who's fine with bringing a kid to fight serial killers' is a lot more of an act than the 'Bruce Wayne who will die from heartbreak if his kid has so much as a scratch on him'. Tim accidentally got hit with a basketball one day in school and all hell broke loose in the principals office. It doesn't matter if that was 1% of the pain Tim feels during any training session or fight. That's his baby boy's precious face.

[piedpip3rrr]

Rockin robin

[finnoky]

Oh little dink