chill

welcome to my blog. my name is emily. im just a girl in college trying not to humiliate herself everyday. i really like cute boys. follow for bad jokes, good tv, and funny shit.

[foulserpent]

i call all my friends after 20 years of no contact and invite them to visit me at my house, which is a farm in the middle of nowhere. they approach the farm gates and i appear looking like this

[sneeking]

..go on…….

[foulserpent]

i lead you into the barn where i live and offer you snacks and refreshments. it’s a bowl of minnows and 3 caprisun pouches

[brightereyes]

accept the capri sun, cautiously refuse the minnows

[foulserpent]

i tell you that it’s fine, leaves more for me, but you can tell im a little hurt. we watch cutthroat kitchen in silence, i seem to be attempting to drink my caprisun through my gas mask, but im failing miserably. you say nothing.

[brightereyes]

i say nothing

[foulserpent]

at one point i go into a shed and bring out more caprisun pouches and a single triscuit for you

[brightereyes]

Thanks

[foulserpent]

youre welcome

[tribute-to-nothing]

[odetocoldplay]

[x]

[meanplastic]

[babydreamgirl-deactivated201902]

????????????????????????????? oh my god???

[chessys]

i need 2 nourish my body so when i die i can contribute maximum nutrients to the trees

[euo]

[billtavis]

remix

[radiation-baby]

[hexeosis]

[sacheu-deactivated20200922]

this is so positive

[weloveshortvideos]

When Hillary tells u that she’s gonna get rid of all your water, soil and paint !

[collegiate-confession]

[peachsip]

[unhappeon]

………open the gate.

[schizoyuri-deactivated20160514]

stop……having it be closed

[cardinalisinfernum-deactivated2]

cutthroat kitchen aka alton brown’s bdsm culinary extravaganza 

[adobeflashplayer]

[coldplay]

The third single from A Head Full Of Dreams is Up&Up! Brand new radio edit available at streaming services and download stores now. #Coldplay #AHFOD

[astrvmnauta-deactivated20220523]

Someone spilled their dunkin donuts coffee in the school lobby so this kid got out his dunkin donuts uniform and started directing traffic around it saying things like “Ma’am watch out, this is a DUNKIN DONUTS MATTER”

[anem0nesiac-deactivated20231104]

when you’re having a nice time but remember you forgot to do something important