Accepting Criticism as a Writer -
As writers, it's very, VERY important to learn how to take criticism. A lot of newer writers find that idea very intimidating because people don't often take the time to explain what that actually means.
Good writers are receptive to criticism. At the same time, they also do not have to tolerate disrespect. In my experience, I've ended up tolerating some very rude and hurtful behavior because I didn't want to be seen as unreceptive to criticism. But here's the thing: there's a big difference between constructive criticism and critical disrespect.
Here are some examples of constructive criticism:
"I think you could do _____ differently."
"I think you should cut this line/character/scene."
Here are some examples of critical disrespect:
"Your work is really cringey."
"I don't think this story is that serious."
"I would be embarrassed to have written this."
All of these comments are critical but not all of them are constructive. When people talk about learning to accept criticism, they are generally talking about constructive criticism. Constructive criticism is criticism with direction. These sorts of comments are meant to help, not hurt. That doesn't mean that they will always be easy to hear, but it does mean that they are well-intended and are meant to help you develop your work and make it better.
Critical disrespect is remarks that both hurt and do not help. These remarks are critical, but not constructive. They are not intended to develop your work, they are intended to make you feel bad.
If you get intimidated when people talk about accepting criticism as a writer, know that they almost always mean constructive criticism, not critical disrespect. You will probably encounter the latter at some point, but not all that frequently.
I've been a writer for 5+ years and I've done a Bachelors in Creative Writing. Through all of that experience sharing my work, I can count on one hand the number of people who have responded to my work with critical disrespect. (That doesn't mean my work is good! It just means that even if your work is still in a very rough phase, people are very nice and helpful about it 99% of the time.)
So, when someone gives you truly constructive criticism, they're doing you a kindness and trying to be helpful (even if their feedback can feel painful to hear). But when someone gives you feedback that is neither helpful nor kind, remember that you do not have to tolerate that. You're not just a writer, you are a person and if someone doesn't like your work, that is okay, but they still have to be respectful about it.
Good luck and happy writing!
janainaart
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