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About Me
Gecko's Lists (lists, charts, and data analysis - mostly fandom related)
Gecko's Headcanons
Gecko's Fic Ideas (plotbunnies for people to use)
Gecko Writes Pretty (Calligraphy in Dead Languages!)
The Rec List (Tim Drake fics I like)
The Rec Blog (The side blog I have devoted to recommending fic)
(Other) People Write Things (My fic reccing tag on THIS blog)
So here’s the thing about the division of “aro” “ace” and “aroace” into three separate identities with three separate flags: it makes no sense to me, personally.
See, I understand the utility of the split-attraction model. I even understand that “romantic attraction” feels like a meaningful category to many people separate from sexual attraction.
But in my personal experience of the world, romance is too much of a construct for “romantic attraction” to make any sense as a coherent thing that I consider myself as having or not having.
And look, everything is a construct, including sexual attraction. But sexual attraction is a construct in the way a brick is a construct; simple, definable, easy to say whether I have it or don’t have it. Romance, on the other hand, is even more obviously entirely culturally defined. It’s a construct in the way a house is a construct. What makes something a house? If I got ten people in a room we could probably cobble together a decent definition of a “brick” that we are all mutually satisfied with, even if it’s not perfect at including all things that are bricks and excluding all things that are not. There might be edge cases but we could do it.
But a house? What defines a house? Is a house that is not currently livable due to damage still a house? What about a house that doesn’t look like an American white picket fence stick built house? Something made of grass or mud or stone. Something for a climate where roofs or walls are a poor choice. What about house boats and RVs?
What defines romance? Is it sex? Non sexual physical intimacy? Emotional connections? Some odd cross sectional grid of the myriad possibilities for human interaction?
Every experience is an edge case when you drill down in it. I have a structure built out of bricks, and there’s a hole in the structure where the brick that is sexual attraction goes for other people. Is the structure a house or not? Could you even tell, without me describing a great deal more about it, its size, its shape? Would you and the person next to you agree, once I did?
And all this means that while I’ll call myself aro and aroace for the purposes of communicating with others, (the size and shape of the brick structure has no bearing on the fact that I do not plan to ever be in a monogamous partnership, and that’s the important thing to convey) the concepts actually have not much real impact on my subjective internality. Being aro or being aroace are not to me separate from my being ace. Or rather they are not to me a reified part of my identity the way being ace is.
So I find it SO WIERD that everyone assumes that they would be. That by default anyone who has an a- identity is going to have a complicated interaction with the split attraction model, that, as @specialagentartemis put it, “the canonical ace is alloromantic and the canonical aro is allosexual, and aroaces are a third thing.”
I recognize it has utility to other people. I like the green aro flag and appreciate having a word to communicate my disinclination to date even if sex weren’t involved. I understand the theory behind the split attraction model. It just doesn’t feel like it applies.
I think that asexuality and aromanticism are a lot like ADHD and autism. Sure, at the end points of the spectrum they describe different things. But in the middle of the spectrum, many people don't have both - they have one thing that can't be divided.
I'm ADHD, which includes so much autistic stuff that I often say I'm autistic for convenience. Am I actually autistic as well? I may never know, and I'm not sure it matters? They aren't really different where I am.
I'm asexual. That apparently includes being so aromantic that I can't actually figure out what romance IS. I've started saying aroace so people don't correct my when I describe "aromantic" experiences as asexual ones, but that's just for audience comfort.
Intellectually, I understand that other people have other experiences, but it feels weird that they consider them to be in distinct categories. I guess we don't all have to be the same group?? I know that some of you guys felt talked over in the early 2010s, so I'm glad you've got your own space now?
lvl 1: the plural of octopus is octopuses because the plural version of a word is the word with an s at the end
lvl 2: the plural version of octopus is octopi because if a word ends with "us" the plural version replaces the "us" with "i" e.g. cactus -> cacti and fungus -> fungi
lvl 3: actually, that rule is only for latin words. octopus is a greek word and the correct plural is octopuses or octopodes
lvl 4: actually, language is descriptive not prescriptive. since enough people over time have used octopi as the plural for octopus, it's a valid plural
lvl 5: the plural of octopus is octopeese, like geese
Lvl 6: My Marine Biology professor told me it was technically “Octopods” to bring it in line with “Cephalopod,” but that if the class is falling asleep you can call them “Octopussies”
The level 3 isn't exactly due to it being from Greek. Even within Latin, -us -> -i only applied to one class of nouns, masculine 2nd declension nouns. -us could also be found in 3rd declension nouns, which took their plural by adding -a (if neuter) or -es (if masculine or feminine) to the oblique stem which was sometimes identical to the nominative singular, but frequently changed (e.g., tempus "time", tempora "times" or venus "beloved one", veneres "beloved ones"), or even 4th declension, whose plural is -ūs for nouns ending in -us in the singular (e.g., manus "hand", manūs "hands")
Of course, it's complicated by the fact that octopus was not used in classical Latin, being an 18th century coining, so which declension it's placed in is somewhat arbitrary. The Classical Latin word for octopus was polypus*, where the -pus was from the same Greek root as in octopus (literally "many feet"), but it was treated as a 2nd declension noun, forming its plural as polypi, while the word for swift (the bird) as apus, also from Greek pous (literally "no foot" because the ancients believed that swifts lived their entire lives in flight and had no legs). but that word was 3rd declension with the plural apodes, so there is classical precedent for treating -pus as either 2nd declension or 3rd declension. However, in New Latin texts, octopus is treated as a 3rd declension noun, so within (New) Latin, that is the accepted plural
At the same time, we're also talking about English grammar here and not Latin grammar. So even though the octopodes form is the accepted nominative plural in Latin, the -us -> -i alternation has been adapted in English for a number of borrowings and can be argued to have been incorporated as an inflectional class in English, in which case one can make an argument for inflecting according to that borrowed noun class, regardless of Latin grammar (indeed, the same argument behind using octopuses as the plural - inflecting according to English grammar rather than Latin grammar)
Strictly speaking, octopods would really only work if the singular had been borrowed as octopod
*Polypus was also used for the cuttlefish and for nasal tumors, hence the English word polyp. Why they used that word for that, I don't know
I’ll tell you what I look for in a fic rec list and then we’ll see what everyone else thinks is good :)
all one fandom, and if it’s shippy then all the same ship
titles of the fic link over to AO3
include the rating of the fics and a brief description (or the reason why you like it)
tag the authors so they know they’ve been rec’d
I’ve definitely seen fic rec lists with a specific theme to them as well, for example “[ship] hurt/comfort recs” but I’m personally good with just the description and picking from there.
Do any of you make rec lists? Do you appreciate them? What makes a good list?
Ooh, I love rec lists, but I have fairly different preferences for them:
All one fandom is good, but it doesn’t need to be all one ship. I don’t have anything against multifandom rec lists, but the odds of me being familiar with multiple fandoms on them are slim. The important thing is to be clear about the rec list’s theme before you actually list the recs themselves (e.g. random works I liked, coffee shop AUs in small fandoms, m/m slash in Specific Fandom, etc).
The reason you like it, or the reason you think other people should read it, is absolutely 100% necessary, and ideally it consists of at least a couple sentences (unless it’s a 100-word drabble you’re reccing). Without this, and especially if I don’t know anything about your taste in fic, it’s not any different than skimming a work listing.
If there’s something that you had to overlook while reading the fic, or something that made you hesitate to rec it, mention it! If I know the reccer would usually consider a lack of empty space between paragraphs a dealbreaker, I might be willing to give the fic a go despite the fact bad paragraph spacing is usually also a dealbreaker for me. But if I just click on a link and find a wall of text, I’ll probably back button from not just the work, but possibly the rec list as well.
I think of recs as being for potential readers, not authors, so if I were making a rec list, I wouldn’t tag them. (But I would try to comment on the fic!)
Hello! I recently started a fic rec blog so I have some thoughts:
I agree that single-fandom (or theme) blogs are more preferable to find, but think about what you want to run also. I wanted a place to archive all my favourite works, and I definitely don't have the energy for multiple blogs so this blog is multifandom. It's not for you (random folk on tumblr) it's for me (person having fun making the blog)
similarly, think about the maximum amount of effort you can spend on the task and still complete it. It would be nice to create a highly polished blog with a written summary and full tags and clear themeing, but that is actually a lot of work!
I've gone with a bullet point summary of author, rating, fandom, ship and then my own thoughts. You can check out the about pages for more information on how I'm organized.
I disagree strongly on tagging the author for a couple reasons - for one, you then have to go through the effort of finding the author (do yourself a favour and avoid giving yourself additional work)
also because as sarking mentioned, it's good to bring up both flaws and personal taste in a rec that may end up being very rude to mention to an author. If I'm reccing you something with the caveat that I really don't like how [important side character] was handled, it would be super rude to tag the author!
Additionally:
Think about longevity! I publish one rec a day through my queue, which means I don't have a lot published yet, but also means my queue is very full and I can chillax between doing a few recs in a row
if you are doing a specific fandom or ship rec blog, it is entirely possible to actually run out of good fic. Don't rush to publish a whole bunch of works just to keep your blog from looking empty! it'll fill up!
tags are your friend, but they can also be your enemy. Don't go overboard on keeping things organized - again! keep your work manageable!
it's very easy to absolutely burn out on a long term project, set yourself up for success at the start!
A lot of this is really good advice, so I'm just going to focus on a few differences between a Rec List and a Rec Blog. I've done both of them, and they have different strengths!
A single-person Rec Blog (a blog that only posts fic recs, one rec to a post) is great for long term reach. You can show off the widest variety of fics. It can slowly gain followers, and people can learn what you like and how it compares to what they like, allowing them to really start to trust your recs!
I find that it helps to have a set format for posts, and to provide more info than you would on a rec list - things like ratings/warnings, ships, a separate summary and comments section, etc.
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A Rec List (one post with a bunch of fic links) is great for creating connections in reader's minds. If they know one authour, they can be introduced to other authours that share a positive quality - similar types of prose, the same types of kinks, a shared tendency to write 50 chapter epics, etc.
This means the fics should be carefully chosen. Just throwing up a bunch of fic you like is functional, but doesn't work to the format's strengths.
It's usually better to have shorter recs than a blog would, relying on an intro to get across the theme, along with general range of warnings, etc. The recs are mostly your reaction, with maybe a sentence hinting at the plot. Individual warnings are only necessary if a fic is exceptional - something like, "This one is darker than the others, with a bit of a horror vibe, but the sibling relationship [or whatever the list is themed around] is SO GOOD!"
Regularly posting rec lists can allow you to get many of the strengths of a rec blog - readers who have learned to trust your taste, possibilities to rec a wide variety of fic, etc. - while also keeping all the strengths of the lists. I've followed multiple people who did this, and they were all great!
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Also, a Rec Blog that allows other people to submit, like I'm currently running, is slightly different, as well.
These are great for building a community. They allow for the longest lifespan, as long as you don't burn out - because you aren't the only one supplying them with fic. And they allow YOU to discover new fic!
Structure of posts should be even more formalized. More info is helpful, because people's ability to communicate what they like about a fic is going to vary wildly, and readers aren't going to learn the submitters' likes and dislikes in the same way they can for a single reccer. You have the highest chance of writers stumbling across their fic, so I STRONGLY suggest a policy of focusing only on the positives.
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A final format is the Multi-Topic Rec List. I have a list I updated for almost a decade, until Tumblr stopped allowing me to edit posts that old. It was focused on a single character, with sections for specific tropes I love. I keep a link to it in my header and pinned post. Really fun to be reading a new fic and get all excited that you can add it to a specific section!
Great if you're not making recs frequently enough for regular lists/blog posts, and aren't looking for huge reach. It never got reblogged a lot, but it did get an outsized number of people sending me messages telling me how much they appreciated it, which is a very different and enjoyable experience!
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Tagging the authour seems to be controversial, but I suggest no matter what format you choose. I also suggest wording things in a way that will feel good for authours to read. Recs are for you and other fans, but fandom works better when we're consistently building each other up, even when the other person isn't around.
Also, tagging the authour can expand your reach a LOT. Authours love reblogging posts complimenting their fic, which means their fans, people who presumably like similar fic to you, are exposed to your rec blog/list, and all the fic by other authours you think are equally good.
So that y’all can have proof of how much I adore my children:
I have only played 45 minutes of my new, very fun game since noon, which was EIGHT HOURS ago! Instead, I have let my eldest use my computer for school (despite there being FOUR OTHER AVAILABLE COMPUTERS, none of which he is willing to accept). I have driven to their school three times. I have let my youngest play the game instead, since we only have one copy on Steam. I have made supper. I have hung out with my family. I have let people use my computer AGAIN, this time for a fighting game that for some reason only works on it.
I am being SO PATIENT AND SACRIFICIAL, you guys! No shelving magic books for me :(
(But once they are in bed. Ah yes. Once they are in bed, I am FINISHING that archery section! Or maybe the illusion magic one? I’m getting close!)
So that y’all can have proof of how much I adore my children:
I have only played 45 minutes of my new, very fun game since noon, which was EIGHT HOURS ago! Instead, I have let my eldest use my computer for school (despite there being FOUR OTHER AVAILABLE COMPUTERS, none of which they are willing to accept). I have driven to their school three times. I have let my youngest play the game instead, since we only have one copy on Steam. I have made supper. I have hung out with my family. I have let people use my computer AGAIN, this time for a fighting game that for some reason only works on it.
I am being SO PATIENT AND SACRIFICIAL, you guys! No shelving magic books for me :(
(But once they are in bed. Ah yes. Once they are in bed, I am FINISHING that archery section! Or maybe the illusion magic one? I’m getting close!)
The last two days I’ve been playing Librarian: Tidy Up the Arcane Library! It’s a librarian simulation “game” which seems designed for me - more activity than game, no timer, no real puzzles, just 3000 books lying on the ground needing to be reshelved.
I highly recommend it if organizing pretty books for hours seems appealing! I’m really enjoying it. But like usual, this review is going to focus on accessibility. And, sadly, Librarian doesn’t do too well when you consider accessibility.
I don’t blame them. This seems to be their first game. There’s almost no info about them online, but it’s quite possible they’re one person doing this in their spare time. The game’s only been out for a month, and it could get an accessibility update at some point in the future. So, lots of grace!
But.
The big issue for me is that most of the information is FAR too subtle, with no way to make it more obvious.
A book being properly shelved glows gold, and an improperly shelved book glows red. But the red is very subtle, very brief, and half the books are a similar shade of brown leather. This is fine if you’re just contrasting “correct” and “incorrect” - if it didn’t glow gold, it’s in the wrong spot. But I have focus and memory issues, so I need to distinguish between “correct”, “incorrect”, and “I got distracted”. I often have to reshelve the same book multiple times to see if it belongs or not. The option to exaggerate the glow for people with vision or focus problems would be very appreciated!
I also can’t read the writing on the book spines, so I need to rely on an expandable list of the books I’m carrying on the other side of the screen. But the writing isn’t bold enough, so I still can’t read titles at a glance. (Many of the titles have similar names, so being able to distinguish subtitles is important!) Also, with the stack of books on one side, and the list on the other, the amount of space left to look around is limited. Being able to switch to a thicker font, and have the text overtop of the books, would really help. Even shrinking the stack of books so I can see would help!
You also can’t remap keys. Using ‘e’ and ‘q’ to pick up/drop books doesn’t work well for me. I keep throwing them while trying to walk. Minecraft lets me change the keys so I stop dropping my pick axe into the ocean, and it would be really nice if this game did the same. I’d love to be able to left click the mouse to pick up, but even switching to a key further from the movement keys would help!
Finally, shelving the books can be a bit finicky. You’re climbing over piles of scattered books, so you often come at a shelf from an angle. But the hit box is only at the very front bottom edge of each shelf, and from many angles is very difficult to hit. It’s only a minor issue for me, but someone with any fine motor control issues would probably struggle to play. Which sucks, because most of the rest of the game WOULD be playable! A hitbox that covers the entire vertical plane in front of the shelves would be much more accessible! (And being able to lock onto a shelf and then navigate spots using the arrow keys would be AMAZING.)
I’m still really enjoying myself. But it sucks that a game about SHELVING BOOKS, something that fits my interests so perfectly , so obviously didn’t think about people like me. I’d really like to be able to tell the books are in the wrong spots!
I’ll tell you what I look for in a fic rec list and then we’ll see what everyone else thinks is good :)
all one fandom, and if it’s shippy then all the same ship
titles of the fic link over to AO3
include the rating of the fics and a brief description (or the reason why you like it)
tag the authors so they know they’ve been rec’d
I’ve definitely seen fic rec lists with a specific theme to them as well, for example “[ship] hurt/comfort recs” but I’m personally good with just the description and picking from there.
Do any of you make rec lists? Do you appreciate them? What makes a good list?
Ooh, I love rec lists, but I have fairly different preferences for them:
All one fandom is good, but it doesn’t need to be all one ship. I don’t have anything against multifandom rec lists, but the odds of me being familiar with multiple fandoms on them are slim. The important thing is to be clear about the rec list’s theme before you actually list the recs themselves (e.g. random works I liked, coffee shop AUs in small fandoms, m/m slash in Specific Fandom, etc).
The reason you like it, or the reason you think other people should read it, is absolutely 100% necessary, and ideally it consists of at least a couple sentences (unless it’s a 100-word drabble you’re reccing). Without this, and especially if I don’t know anything about your taste in fic, it’s not any different than skimming a work listing.
If there’s something that you had to overlook while reading the fic, or something that made you hesitate to rec it, mention it! If I know the reccer would usually consider a lack of empty space between paragraphs a dealbreaker, I might be willing to give the fic a go despite the fact bad paragraph spacing is usually also a dealbreaker for me. But if I just click on a link and find a wall of text, I’ll probably back button from not just the work, but possibly the rec list as well.
I think of recs as being for potential readers, not authors, so if I were making a rec list, I wouldn’t tag them. (But I would try to comment on the fic!)
Ooh, I always want the authours tagged if possible! Mostly because if a tagged authour I follow reblogs it, I get to see other authours that the reader considers similar enough to rec together with this person I love!
Since I love Gen recs, it’s usually about a single character, instead of a ship, or about a bunch of fic with a similar tone. (Agree it should all be one fandom, unless you’re dealing with fandoms that have a huge overlap of fans.) Lists with similar tones are actually my favourites. “Ten fic with haunting prose”, “my favourite dramatic fic about siblings from 2025”, “dark-ish fic with hopeful endings”, etc.
I like a brief summary/teaser (usually a sentence or less) and then some of the reasons the reccer enjoyed it. The goal is to interest the reader just enough that they click through and read the actual fic’s summary and tags, not tell them everything they need to know.
I often include warnings in my own recs, but rarely ratings, since I find that information about tone and major warnings will usually provide more information. It doesn’t have to be the usual AO3 warnings either - I used to target my recs at aroace fans, so I’d include the amount of icky kissing in the warnings section.
If you’re going to include a wide range of ratings, people often start with the lighter ones and end with the higher ratings. They also often separate Gen and shippy stuff if they’re including both.
But the absolutely best thing you can include is bias! The more I learn about what you like and dislike, the more valuable your recs become. Praise fic for being canon compliant, or having great worldbuilding, or for the writing style, or how steamy the sex is - things that show me how you’re judging what’s on the list. I’ve followed several people because they cared about elements of fic I also cared about, to the point that I could trust their recs without even having to read the blurb.
Basically, I think your recs should focus on the elements you care about, because those are the things where your opinion will actually tell us something. I don’t include ratings, because I have nothing to say about them that the fic doesn’t say better. I do include information about how many times I needed to take a break and calm down, because that lets the readers know I like emotionally intense stuff, and this one rated highly on a emotional intensity scale!
if i couldn't have any of the obvious first choice superpowers i would want my power to be the power of i can go anywhere and its not a problem. the way this power would work is that as long as im peaceful and respectful i can go anywhere and nobody will see it as weird or see me as a target for hostility. i can walk into a cool house to politely peep the decor or walk into a tall office building to politely peep the decor or walk around a city at night alone to politely peep the decor or walk into a strange facility to politely peep the decor or walk onto a plane and ride the plane to its destination and then walk around there to politely peep the decor and its fine as long as im chill. no need to make me faster or anything i can just walk at a normal pace. its good for the soul.
messed up that you can literally be better and nicer in every way and the adventuring party will still be like "waaa its a shapeshifter waaaa the real whatstheirface would never say that" like ok maybe i am a picture perfect copy of your friend that i imprisoned beneath the earth and replaced when you werent looking. so what. maybe they were a cunt. maybe i thought youd appreciate an improved version of your friend. with awesome eldritch tendrils.
So I like to download most fanfiction I read . At the moment I adore stories with pretend chats . The issue is they are often configured to look pretty online but it does not translate well for saving as doc. Any ideas how to do this properly so the stories stays readable even if downloaded?
Thank you!
It's going to come down to how the chats are entered into the fic.
If they're embedded images, then downloading the PDF or HTML would keep them in place.
If the chat is formattied via a work skin, that CSS won't transfer with the rest of the content so you'll get plain text instead of the formatted text enabled by the workskin.
How well that plain text is presented is going to depend on the work skin being used. You can get a preview of what the downloaded version will look like by clicking or tapping on the Hide Creator's Style button at the top of the fic. That will remove the work skin and show you the plain text.
Hi! I'm so fucking qualified here. I wrote a chatfic as someone who downloads fics and gets frustrated because I can't read hardly any chatfics because of it.
I spent thirty hours coding my own skin for my fic so it'd look awesome on computers and phones while also being comfortably readable when downloaded. I keep meaning to clean it up and submit it to be a public workskin.
It's finicky and it results in an absolute clusterfuck of html and took ages to get it right, and I had to compromise on aesthetics a lot (in order for it to look decent on both mobile and computer browsers).
Anyway, basically, in order to make it look cool, unless you're like me and code your own skin knowing you want it accessible to people who download it, it's not going to be readable when it's downloaded.
Maybe if you download the page itself as a .webp, it'll be okay? But at that point you may as well just read it in your browser.
(More info about my code under the cut)
What I did was I made text bubbles, colours, edited spacing, fucking everything. Like I said, I spent weeks working on this. I haven't cleaned it up because I kind of never want to see it again.
But with all of that, I also added an invisible header. In a browser, the heading may only say "Riza Hawkeye" and then have text bubbles back and forth, but the downloaded versions (I checked all of them btw), before each text it either says "Me" or "Riza" depending on who is speaking.
It was clever and I want everyone to do it, however, the html is a disaster, and there's just no way to make it easier. I'll show you that after I show you what the fic looks like.
Mobile browser (ft the regular site skin I use):
Desktop browser (but from my phone because I can't quite fit the whole convo on the screenshot and don't want to stitch it. It's very close though):
And now on my phone's ereader (ft my big-ass font):
Finally, here's the html for that four text back-and-forth (it has to be a screenshot because tumblr also uses html):
And the thing is, this is for every single message. The writer has to remember to add the person whose text it is's name to every message, invisibly, without fail. On top of all the rest of it. Not to mention other formatting in the fic.
As frustrating and frankly upsetting as it is, there's a good reason that most chatfics are inaccessible to people who download. Seriously, the html for this fic took a solid 15 hours, plus skin troubleshooting.
I spent 45 hours over the course of a month on a 3k fic. People aren't going to do that.
I hope that if I get my skin out there that people might spend a few extra hours utilising the invisible heading so it's accessible to screenreaders, but...
So yeah. tl;dr read it in your browser or don't read it :/
oh, and if you're interested, here's my fic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/79757431
Here in central Canada, my apple tree blossomed yesterday. It's late May. The crops will be harvested sometime in October. A 5 month growing season means that we have NO native fruit. (It's argued that there might have be a native apple of some type pre-Contact, but that's considered unlikely.)
What we do have is berries. Many many berries. 3 types of cranberries. 2 types of blueberries. Chokecherries. Raspberries and their many kin. Multiple types of currants. Strawberries. Things that only exist here, like saskatoons. Buffaloberries, bilberries, things like rose hips that are only sort of berries - we have SO MANY.
Berries are small, grow quick, and are easy to support on a small plant, making them perfect for our short growing season. Many can grow on terrible soil. They were a main flavouring agent for indigenous food. They don't need a huge amount of care.
SO WHY THE HECK ARE THEY SO EXPENSIVE IN THE STORE?!?
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(I know the reasons - many are delicate and transport poorly, and some are labour intensive to harvest. But I want to be able to afford frozen raspberries again!)
Just reread Kon Is Loyal after both my fics from Damian's perspective, and it made me feel good. Those were some distinct voices!
I'd like to be able to push the differences between how Damian, Cass, and Tim sound a bit more. And Kara's voice was REALLY weak! (I'm relying too heavily on vocabulary and verbal tics to distinguish them.) I'd like to be a bit more intentional about how their thoughts flow and pool, like I was with Kon. Everyone other than Damian trails off/cuts themselves off in ways that say more about me than the characters, which is annoying. (Some characters have longer attention spans, Gecko, and they should be written with longer paragraphs, and fewer scene transitions!)
I also need to learn to write conversations. Keeping everyone stuck in their heads because I'm bad at talking isn't always what's best for the characters. I want to be able to write Dick or Babs some day, and summarizing conversations as they mull over them later won't always work.
But Damian is obviously younger than my other narrators. Everyone lies to themselves in distinct ways. Tim's looping anxiety reads differently than Cass's straightforward intrigue and Damian's protective bluster. How present in the moment the viewpoint characters are varies a LOT, in ways that I think fit who they are.
And Kon is really good. The whole fic flows different, sounds different, feels lighthearted and fun in a way that I think is an appealing contrast to the other stories. He focuses on very different things than the other characters. The way even his internal monologue is directed outward, as a series of apologies to Tim, says a lot about his way of interacting with the world. I'm proud of this fic!
So, overall, I'm happy with my character voices. I feel they're a bit stronger than I was previously giving myself credit for. Nice thing to recognize!
What’s it called when you have Can’t Talk Disorder? (Or Talk Weird Disorder?)
So, you’re neurodivergent¹ and you can’t talk. Well ... you CAN talk ... some of the time ... but it hurts, or people don’t understand ... and, like, you can tell SOMETHING’S wrong ... but they’re saying you shouldn’t call it ‘going nonverbal’ ² and, well, what DO you call it?
The answer is complicated. There is SO MANY terms for various ways to not speak, have limited speech, or have weird speech. And they all seem to be pretty narrow. ‘Mute’ refers to all people who can’t speak, no matter the cause, and ‘nonverbal’ technically means the same thing, though it’s more often used when there seems to be a neurological (brain) reason for the lack of speech. But there doesn’t seem to be similar terms for ‘speech is hard’ that doesn’t have a cause baked into it.
‘Aphasia’ and ‘apraxia of speech’ are limited to brain injuries. ‘Dysphonia’ is limited to physical injury to the vocal chords. ‘Language disorders’ are limited to things diagnosed in children at a young age when their speech/understanding is delayed. ‘Selective mutism’ refers specifically to trauma affecting speech ability. Etc.
Rather than a broad term that everyone can use, I’ve discovered some more narrow descriptors of various difficulties that someone could have. But, before I get into them, I want to discuss WHY it can be helpful to have this language. And why it can be unhelpful.
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I’ve known there was ‘something wrong’ since I was a kid. Talking hurts my head. It’s exhausting. I make a lot of mistakes. Sometimes I’m reduced to tears and shaking. But I’ve never had the words to describe what’s wrong. And it’s made me feel like I’m faking, being lazy, or imagining things.
Not having set terms also means that other people tend to interpret what I’m saying as normal difficulties with communication. Everyone has trouble finding the words sometimes, and says the wrong word occasionally! It’s really hard to communicate the scale of my issues, especially since they aren’t bad enough to get a professional diagnosis. They’re just wearing me down daily and making me avoid all social interaction. (Please mentally insert sarcastic/rolling eyes emoji here. I don’t understand emoji enough to do it myself.)
Having terminology helps me be patient with myself, and research things that might help. It helps me recognize patterns, and that certain behaviours and experiences are related - that they're not a whole bunch of separate issues.
On the other hand, many of these terms ARE pathologizing normal behaviours. (That means treating them like they’re signs of disorders.) Especially with psychotic disorders, it seems like EVERYTHING gets treated like a sign that you’re broken.³ Please don’t look at these terms and think they mean that your harmless behaviours are actually things that are wrong with you!
It’s only a problem if it’s hurting you, okay?
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¹ The working definition for ‘neurodivergent’ in this post is limited to autism, ADHD, tic disorders, PTSD, and mental disorders in the psychotic, anxiety, and mood varieties. Because those are the things that turned up during my research.
² The reasons that people object to the phrase ‘going nonverbal’ are complex. I don’t understand all the nuance. For me, the heart of the issue is that it makes it harder for nonverbal people, who already find communication hard, to find resources for themselves and connect with other people experiencing the same things. It makes a term less clear for the people least able to be flexible with terminology. And it implies a connection with the experiences of people who are often frustrated with people talking for and over them.
³ If you’re dealing with a psychotic disorder, the term ‘thought disorder’ exists for these challenges. It’s ... well. I found it a good starting point to find many of the more narrow terms! I think the behaviours it describes are real! The way things are framed seems gross and ableist, though, so look it up at your own discretion.
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Anyways, on to the terms I’ve found for specific language issues!
(If anything feels like it might fit, look it up and find out more! These are VERY brief summaries. Just be prepared for the ableism. There's a lot.)
added sounds/words/phrases -
If you produce extra, unintended, syllables and words while trying to speak, or substitute syllables/words with incorrect ones, it's possibly 'paraphasia'.
If you use confused language, with seemingly unconnected words and phrases, it's possibly 'incoherence', or a 'word salad'. If this is due to schizophrenia, it's possibly 'schizophasia'.
If you involuntarily swear or say obscene words, it's possibly 'corprolalia'.
If you involuntarily make sudden and/or repetitive sounds, words or movements, it's possibly a 'tic disorder' and you have 'tics'.
repeated sounds/words/phrases -
If you involuntarily repeat your own words/phrases, it's possibly 'palilalia'.
If you involuntarily repeat the words/phrases that another person/show/etc has said, it's possibly 'echolalia'.
If you repeat sounds/words, prolong sounds, and get 'blocked' (have periods where no sounds will come out), it's possibly 'stuttering' or 'stammering', and you 'stutter'.
If you speak rapidly, repeat yourself, and use too many words, it's possibly 'logorrhea'.
If you involuntarily make sudden and/or repetitive sounds, words or movements, it's possibly a 'tic disorder' and you have 'tics'.
prolonged sounds –
If you repeat sounds/words, prolong sounds, and get 'blocked' (have periods where no sounds will come out), it's possibly 'stuttering' or 'stammering', and you 'stutter'.
wrong sounds -
If you produce extra, unintended, syllables and words while trying to speak, or substitute syllables/words with incorrect ones, it's possibly 'paraphasia'.
If you pronounce specific sounds weird, it's possibly a 'speech sound disorder', an 'articulation disorder' or a 'phonemic disorder'. Subsets:
If you pronounce sibilants ('s' sounds) weird, it's possibly 'lisping' and you 'have a lisp'.
If you pronounce rhotics ('r' sounds) weird, it's possibly 'rhotacism'.
abnormal word use -
If you use confused language, with seemingly unconnected words and phrases, it's possibly 'incoherence', or a 'word salad'. If this is due to schizophrenia, it's possibly 'schizophasia'.
If you use overly formal, flowery, fancy, 'dictionary' language, it's possibly 'stilted speech'.
If you use confused language, with seemingly unconnected words and phrases, it's possibly 'incoherence', or a 'word salad'. If this is due to schizophrenia, it's possibly 'schizophasia'.
If you speak rapidly, with erratic rhythm and poor grammar/syntax, it's possibly 'cluttering'.
added ideas/words/length of speech -
If you speak rapidly, repeat yourself, and use too many words, it's possibly 'logorrhea'.
If you chain together words based on rhymes, alliteration, or idea, without logical connections between them, due to mental illness, it's possibly 'clanging', 'association chaining' or 'glossomania'.
If you can't eliminate irrelevant/inappropriate details about something, it's possibly 'overinclusion'.
If you can't answer a question without a lot of unnecessary detail, it's possibly 'circumstantial speech' or 'circumstantial thinking'.
unconnected/abnormally connected ideas -
If your next thought is replaced by something connected/similar but not actually appropriate for the conversation, it's possibly 'evasion', 'paralogia', or 'perverted logic'.
When you think random, unconnected things have important meanings related to you, it's possibly 'referential thinking'.
If you chain together words based on rhymes, alliteration, or idea, without logical connections between them, due to mental illness, it's possibly 'clanging', 'association chaining' or 'glossomania'.
If you abruptly jump between ideas/topics, it's possibly a 'flight of ideas'.
If you frequently jump to unrelated, or barely related thoughts, it's possibly 'derailment', 'loose association', 'knight's move thinking', or 'disordered thinking'. (This is one of the ones they praise if you’re not mentally ill, by the way.)
If you can't answer a question without a lot of unnecessary detail, it's possibly 'circumstantial speech' or 'circumstantial thinking'.
get stuck on ideas -
If you get stuck on words or ideas, and can't change to another topic, it's possibly 'perseveration'.
rapid speech -
If you speak rapidly, without pauses and spaces to interrupt, it's possibly 'pressured speech'.
If you speak rapidly, repeat yourself, and use too many words, it's possibly 'logorrhea'.
If you speak rapidly, with erratic rhythm and poor grammar/syntax, it's possibly 'cluttering'.
erratic rhythm/no rhythm control -
If you speak rapidly, with erratic rhythm and poor grammar/syntax, it's possibly 'cluttering'.
limited speech -
If you add less detail than expected, say few words, or communicate very little with your words, it's possibly 'alogia', or 'laconic speech'. (The Wiki article for this one is kind of disgusting. Sometimes psychologists make me mad.)
loss of ideas/point/words -
If you frequently jump to unrelated, or barely related thoughts, it's possibly 'derailment', 'loose association', 'knight's move thinking', or 'disordered thinking'. (This is one of the ones they praise if you’re not mentally ill, by the way.)
If you lose your train of thought due to noticing things around you, it's possibly 'distractible speech'.
If you wander off topic and don't return, it's possibly 'tangential speech' or 'tangentiality'.
If your trains of thought abruptly stop and you may not be able to start them again, it's possibly 'thought blocking', or 'obstructive thought'.
If you can't speak, either entirely or in certain situations - due to anxiety, stress, trauma, or other psychological issues – it's possibly 'selective mutism' and you are 'selectively mute'.
If you repeat sounds/words, prolong sounds, and get 'blocked' (have periods where no sounds will come out), it's possibly 'stuttering' or 'stammering', and you 'stutter'.
genusniebla
Hey just so you know you don’t have to have a brain injury to have aphasia. People can have aphasia from migraines and other neurological disorders that disrupt the functioning of the brain. Symptoms that act the exact same way as types of aphasia are reported a lot by patients with fibromyalgia and ME/CFS (both are part neurological disorders) and some autoimmune conditions, but there’s been no solid research into this because of course there hasn’t lol. For migraines it tends to be be categorized as “transient aphasia.” This can also happen with epilepsy
On the topic of fan community, one of your posts inspired me to send a bunch of fandom asks to various Tumblrinas in the fandom and got a lot of responses! It was really fun, and I'd encourage anyone who sees this to find fellow fans and throw them a quick question!
That's amazing, anon! You made so many people's days 😀
I'm so glad you decided to put yourself out there and had a lot of fun. You rock!
[Image looks like movie box art, and is titled, "Batgirl Animated: Silent Knight 2," over a batlogo surrounded with lines to look like the stitching on Cass's mask.
The word 'night' has had a 'k' added to change it from the dark half of the day to the medieval soldier. The '2' is written above the added 'k', and also looks like stitching.
Other text on the image read "Project Launch", "Cassandra Cain", and "2000".
An image of Cass from the 2000 Batgirl series is leaping above a city skyline.
