Let Me Love You | Luke Hemmings
Pairing: Luke Hemmings x Reader (she/her)
Summary: Luke knew it wasn’t his fault Y/N didn't let him get any closer, but he just wished to know what he could do to make it better.
Warning: angsty, trusting issues, mentioning of a breakup, the reader may have low self-esteem
Author’s Note: I know it's been a while, I had some troubles with writing for the past few months, but I'm finally back with a new story. It's a little messy, but I hope you'll enjoy it! ♡
How much time does it usually take for the memories of a past relationship to stop being such a burden? Y/N was asking herself that pretty often, hoping to finally find the answer. Was it all because of her ex or, in fact, she was the reason? Was it a stupid trauma that she gained dating a wrong person, or something she was born with?
Y/N knew she had to be more open to people. They say, if you trust the Universe well enough, it will reward you. To the girl it seemed more the opposite, as if, when she was finally facing the world, it would gladly stab her in the back. Was she a pessimist? Maybe. But people made her to be so.
After a good chapter a bad one always followed. Like in Kacey Musgraves’ song, Y/N was getting anxious when she was suddenly having the time of her life. And when a new person she met seemed weirdly nice, she couldn’t help but wondering what was the trick.
Luke didn’t have anything up his sleeves, though. He was the kindest and the most patient person Y/N ever met, and sometimes she even questioned if she deserved to be treated that way. Differently, tenderly. Sincerely.
She tried her best to be less cautious and just trust Luke more; yet, the guy saw the eyes full of uncertainty every time he was suggesting her a ride home. Every time he smiled at her, Y/N was scared to smile back and to feel those familiar butterflies which caused no good in the past.
Butterflies were ugly, weren’t they? The wings were stunning and beautiful, however, looking closer at them, they were not much different from other scary bugs. Y/N was afraid to make the same mistake. Life was all about mistakes, but the girl couldn’t just let herself relax for once.
The question was stupid. When Luke asked it out loud, he thought that he could have worked a bit harder on that one and could have come up with a better option to help Y/N to speak up. He knew it wasn’t his fault she didn’t let him get any closer, however, he wished to at least know what he could do to make it easier for her.
There was something about her that made Luke keep going. He wasn’t aggressive in his affection, no, but he wanted her to know that he cared. And Y/N was always honest with him, saying that even though she liked him, too, she could not open up and trust him right away. It was okay. Sure, Luke could take it personally, and no doubts, he did at first, but Y/N didn’t even dare to blame him for that. However, with time, little by little, they started to understand each other a bit more.
“Did he love you back?…” Luke asked carefully, looking at her eyes. Unhappy ones, as Y/N was clearly not enjoying the fact that he suddenly decided to stir up the memories she was trying so hard to place on a shelf of traumas. But some things needed to be shaken so that they would disappear into thin air completely. That’s what the guy was trying to do at least.
“Sometimes,” Y/N shrugged. Her voice didn’t express a regret or even сoncern at that point. It was a simple fact that she, unfortunately, realised too late. It’d be a lie to say there were no feelings left for that person who broke her heart so cruelly, yet, it wasn’t even close to anything romantic. It was just pain, an aching pain that would stop her from moving forward. It was too vicious to tear her heart apart into small pieces and still – to keep making her suffer. As if he didn’t want her to let him go, even though she desperately needed to.
Luke was different. It sounded silly and naive in her own head, but she tried to believe the inner voice. The voice that was so quiet for a very long time. Funny, how actually correct the phrase “love is blind” was. Y/N used to think she would know for sure if a person wasn’t good to her, if they were rude or arrogant. And yet, she let her drawn in a relationship that didn’t make her happy, not even a bit. She’d force herself to think she was enjoying the seesaw he was constantly putting her through, but in reality it was giving her nothing but anxiety.
The time passed, though, and she needed to carry on. Especially when next to Y/N was him, Luke. She hated herself for being so careful, but the girl was so scared to repeat her mistakes that sometimes it felt easier to stop trying and simply lose him completely just in order to skip another potential page of pain. Luke was stubborn, though. He was patient and stubborn, which were one of the most dangerous characteristics of any person. And yet, he never forced her to anything, and he certainly respected her decision. Luke also respected the time they were spending together, and that was, perhaps, one of the dramatic changes for Y/N.
“It’s okay, we can meet some other day,” Y/N hurried up to comfort the guy, when he shared that a music video shooting was taking way longer than expected. Even if Luke was extremely busy, he still would find time to leave her a small sweet message or give the girl a short call.
“No-no, it’s alright, I’m still fine to meet. I mean, it’ll be later, but if you’re cool with it…”
It got quiet at the end of the phone. Y/N needed to get used to the fact that Luke was always able to find time for them, no matter what. It felt a little alien at first, as in the past it seemed almost natural and normal to her that the partner was too tired and busy to go out.
"Do you want me to come to your area instead?" the girl awkwardly asked, still feeling stupidly guilty for the fact that Luke had to drive all the way from the place he had his shooting to her area, which wasn’t in a close distance at all.
“It’s alright,” Luke quietly giggled, feeling especially soft when Y/N would once again doubting if she could allow someone to simply take care of her. Sometimes, though, he wished she had never met the man who made her doubt every action of his. “It’ll be already late, and I don’t want you to drive there alone, okay? I’ll drive to your area, we’ll have late dinner, and then I’ll just drive back home. How do you feel about it?”
Luke didn’t dare to ask or hint to stay at her place even for once. It was out of discussion — they just started seeing each other, getting to know each other. The guy understood that it’d take time for Y/N to be fully comfortable with him, and he was ready to wait as much as it was needed. What a relief it was for Y/N to find out that not all guys shamelessly cared where she lived or if she lived alone.
The late evening met them with a cold wind and little rain. Y/N was sitting across a table and wondering why, despite such freezing weather, she felt so warm, just by looking at Luke. Why his baby blue eyes always reminded her of the morning summer sky, and why his gaze was so tender and sweet…
"What is it?" the musician smiled lightly, seeing her staring at him for a little longer than usual. "Is there a sauce on my lips?"
"No," Y/N giggled under her nose and shook the head negatively. "I was just thinking how lucky I am to meet you."
A bigger smile appeared on Luke’s face. The heart jumped on the chest, and his palms became suddenly little sweaty as if he was twelve years old, who fell in love for the very first time. Maybe it was not the case, but Luke had never heard such words in his life until that exact moment. He didn’t even know how much he actually needed to hear it from her.
"You have no idea how happy I am, when I’m with you," he simply responded and carefully took Y/N’s hand in his. She relaxed her palm and thought that maybe she knew, because his sincere eyes was simply saying it all. "Just… let me love you, okay? It’s all what ask."
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