About two paychecks ago, I bought 4 whole packages of gummies. I ate three whole gummies. I was not suppose to eat 3 whole gummies - PSA read the packaging of your edibles, kids.
Here's how that went.
I ate 3 gummies and went with my mom to her doctor's appointment. I got the munchies and went to take the elevator to go to the cafe on the first floor (we were on the second floor). The elevator wasn't coming up and I couldn't stand still. That's when I noticed that maybe I was too high.
So I took the stairs because the elevator was taking too long. And worried that I wasn't going to remember how to go down stairs. I make it to the cafe, buy my sandwich, and went to go on the now working elevator but decided there were too many people and that they would definitely know I'm high. Panicked for 2 seconds about going up the stairs.
We got home and I immediately go to my room to pass out after washing my hair and face. 30 minutes later - I think, because at this point I'm very positive I was dreaming (I was not) ‐ I carefully and quickly go downstairs for the second and final vomit session.
On the way home was vomit session #1. This was not fun.
I don't remember making it out of the bathroom and up the stairs fully, just bits and pieces of what I thought at the time was a fever dream. I do remember this stream of consciousness on the way back to my room:
"I can totally make it up the stairs."
"Oh cool, I'm in my bed now. I didn't know I could teleport."
Then it was one 3 hour nap later and I felt much better.
Moral of the story: Read the labels on your edibles or suffer the hilarious consequences.














