jared 19

im just gonna throw whatever onto here // he/they! also im 21 now.

[puirell-deactivated20221122]

when i see pads advertised as for “night use”

[puirell-deactivated20221122]

[kirianthedivorce]

For my non uk followers wondering wtf is going on:

- prime minister is a cunt. Had like a bajillion scandals

- latest one was apparently one two many. Two extremely important cabinet members resigned within minutes of each other

- within the next 24 hours about a third of the government resigned

- one resigned live on tv. Five resigned with the same letter to save time

- previous record for government resignations within 24 hours was 6 and it it was in the 1930s. We are, as I’m writing this, on 45 resignations

- Michael Gove, another cunt who is hated by all, was going to resign but was sacked instead in what appears to be the prime minister going “you can’t quit you’re fired!”

- government meetings are being cancelled because there is literally nobody in those departments anymore

- despite literally everyone begging him at this point to leave, including his most loyal little evil henchman, prime minister is refusing to resign in disgrace as is traditional for British prime ministers

- prime minister genuinely seems to be in complete denial anything serious is happening

- people are calling for Larry the Cat, no. 10’s chief mouser to be the next prime minister. When asked for comment, he licked his arse on live television

[everythingfox]

Angy

(via)

[lvlnarrative]

I love that when the camera starts shaking, you know it’s because the person is laughing.

[kibumkim]

Some of yall need to be more embarrassed about what yall say online and im not talking about the fandom people because at least they have friends that share their niche interests. Some of yall dont even have that and be on here talking to strangers any kind of way and then wonder why ur lonely. Like girl it’s because u are awful to be around

[spectreln]

SInce when is "yall" a valid word? Honestly, it pisses me off to reduce two words to one, especially since the other defines a human being.

[combeferret]

don’t you love it when people give a useful example of the op’s point out in the wild of a post

[fuks]

crying rn 🥹

[dadvans]

[stormesandshowers]

[ageofgeek]

the special relationship is as strong as ever, lads

[nightmarist]

[asfgjfkgjnfkjgnkfjg]

“You’re not a fujoshi. You’re a cis man. You’re a fudanshi.”

Have you ever considered this: Gender roles are fake. Yaoi helps me get in touch with divine feminine energy. 

[poop-here]

Dunno about you bud, but yaoi helps ME get in touch with divine masculine energy. Definitely makes me more manly.

I think you should check out “Yuri” it would definitely help.

[asfgjfkgjnfkjgnkfjg]

I don’t want to intrude on women’s business.

[nephilidae]

How can anyone hate Junji Ito 

[demigodoftheatre]

I love when you recognize junji ito’s style and you read on not knowing if it’s going to be horrific or just cute cat stuff

[otherwindow]

a fantasy setting where the public library is considered a theme park for mages and instead of “you must be this tall to ride” it’s “you must be this resistant to arcane missile” or “your hat must be this huge to study”

[dungeonmalcontent]

I started this with the line “no hat, no heels, no service” intending to make a joke about how most wizards wear heels cus they’re insecure about their height… then i realized that the original shirt and shoes lime works so well because of the total alliteration… so now im working with “no focus, no familiar, no folios” which sounds kinda forced to me.

[danddisaster]

“No components, no cantrips, no content.”

“No arcana, no artifacts, no academia.”

“No wand, no wards, no wisdom.”

“No staff, no spells, no service.”

[whitepeopletwitter]

[kalesrebellion]

So funny story actually. One of my friends was hooking up with this girl, they were friends with benefits. She needed a date for some work party so he agreed to go with her. Turns out her dad owns like 3 dental practices and she worked as the business manager for one of them.

Anyway my friend had some not so nice teeth and during dinner the father of his fwb was like “you work where you work, you sleep with him and his teeth look like that? Get him an appointment.”and then bounced. So his fwb made him an appointment at the practice she managed and my friend ended up needing like 3k worth of dental work and his friend with benefits just gave it to him for free.

So that is the story of how my friend not only got sex, but dental out of the friends with benefits deal.

[helloitsbees]

[iusedtobecharming-deactivated20]

Do we have a franz kafka diary entry for july 1st, i want to know what he thinks!!!

[rehearsing]

happy too tired July everyone

[horreurscopes]

awake at 4 am i gotta remind myself that none of the emotioions im experiencing rightnow are peer reviewed

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

i can hear gangnam style vaguely filtering in from the upstairs flat 

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

Statement begins

[churchbelles]

Statement of theshitpostcalligrapher, regarding strange noises originating from her upstairs flat. Statement recorded June 17, 2020.

[zwoelffarben]

Everyone’s who’s ever rented is probably familiar wit the experience; I ain’t heard of a landlord that bothered with soundproofing their floors. You might get lucky if you find yourself one of the less bastardly landlord and have some soundproof walls, but soundproof floors are unheard of.

So, you go through your leases constantly listening to whatever nonsense noise the tenets in the upstairs flat happen to be making; Unhappy couple fights, happy couples fuck, and Ringo plays the drums at one in the morning; maybe not the Ringo, but a Ringo, yeah?

Keep reading

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

LISTEN I AM NOT A VOICEACTOR BUT THE TEMPTATION TO RECORD THIS

[epilepticsaints]

Very human inventions

[dingdongyouarewrong]

it’s kind of deeply depressing that there exists this entire vast subculture of progressive-learning 15-19 year olds online who are legitimately filled with anxiety over their media consumption diet and closely monitor themselves and others to make sure nothing they consume is Problematic™ lest they be ousted from their social circles. at the exact age where it’s actually good to have a varied media diet and be able to critically engage with harmful elements, too

[dingdongyouarewrong]

straight up if you are high school or early university aged and you’re spending time feeling significant guilt and anxiety about what you choose to read or watch because of your online peers and shaping your media diet based on fear, you do not have to be around those peers anymore. there is a vast world outside this kind of person

[handsmotif]

you know what’s funny. discord started as a gaming app. like it was so you could do voice calls during games. now it’s the home to hundreds of microcommunities’ drama the likes of which you have never seen

[sentiniel]

dont need to hide this in the tags guys

[catchymemes]

[fredersen]