Clipped Wings
A Seonghwa Fanfic
Content Warning: This story contains themes regarding mental health and tragic separation.
Word Count: 1.13K
Clipped Wings Teaser
Tags: @minminnie924 , @phantom-nights , @a-boys-luvr-girl , @sammwasthere , @it-ar3-l3a , @seewale , @kayb2005, @nishimurariki-wife
Author Note: This is my first work being posted on Tumblr. The following people have been tagged because they liked the teaser! I hope you all enjoy Clipped Wings. Please like, reblog, and comment!
Life is cruel in its own ways. It punishes people who are already struggling to hold on. Almost laughing in their face, the second everything starts to feel normal for them. For Nabi, life has only ever laughed at her. Every day was a battle within itself. Everything that she carried weighed heavily not only on her shoulders but deep within her soul. It made her feel hopeless. All she ever wanted was some peace, possibly even a normal life. The only way she could do that was if she left everything behind and started all over in a new city. Nabi would eventually settle into a quiet life working at a bakery. It was a life that was empty in many different aspects. It made Nabi doubt if the risk she took was worth it. She started to believe that nothing would ever change. This was her fate, a sad one to be exact.
However, it's funny can bring change to you in the most unexpected ways. Nabi never expected change to appear in a stranger. His warm smile and boba eyes had welcomed her into his life long before they spoke. They had met in the small bakery where Nabi worked. He would come in every Friday to order a small slice of strawberry cake. Nabi would carefully package the slice for him. Every time, he smiled warmly at her. It was one of those smiles that really feels genuine, like they weren't two strangers. It took some time before the two would exchange words. To Nabi, it felt as if speaking would ruin the rare peacefulness that occurred every Friday. To Seonghwa, he never wanted to interrupt her work. Eventually, the small smile every Friday would be occupied with small questions about life. Nothing too deep, but questions that slowly brought the two together.
Normally, Nabi would never let anyone get close to her. She always tried to make herself small and forgettable. It was safer that way for her heart and safer for others if they kept their distance. But there was something about Seonghwa that slowly broke down the walls she spent years building. Maybe it was the way he spoke so gently to her, or the way he never pressed further when she suddenly couldn't find the proper words to answer his questions. She couldn't help but also welcome him into her quiet, empty life.
There was a careful rhythm their relationship had found. Opening their hearts to each other was hard. Nabi had tried numerous times to push Seonghwa away out of fear. She was scared of never being able to be the person he needed. Never able to love him properly or the way he deserved. She couldn't understand why someone like Seonghwa would love her. Seonghwa was endlessly patient. Every time she tried to push him away with her silence or distance, he wouldn't yell or try to make her feel small. Instead, he would simply let her know that he will be there when she's ready. Never rushing her to open her heart. Patiently waiting for the day when she could accept his love.
Eventually, Nabi allowed Seonghwa into not only her heart, but the broken world she tried so desperately to hide. The life she lived before Seonghwa had made the ache within her soul unbearable. The ache she felt deep within her soul made her wonder often if it was worth living. Every day slowly became harder. Little tasks started to feel unachievable. She felt incapable. Seonghwa never judged her; instead, he took time to carefully understand how the ache within became so bad. They would spend the quiet hours of the night wrapped up in blankets, sharing stories. Little by little, Seonghwa learned. The life Nabi lived was never easy. It was one filled with great sadness and loneliness. Seonghwa began to realize that, for the first time, Nabi finally had someone. Someone who loved her for who she was. Someone who listened instead of judging. Someone who actually wanted to see her find peace.
Their relationship blossomed slowly after that. Some days were harder than others. Nabi felt like she was holding Seonghwa back. Blocking him from finding the peace he deserved. The guilt slowly ate away at her. Even though she never voiced her guilt, he knew. So Seonghwa made a point to show Nabi how much she is loved, even on the worst days. He wanted her to see that everything could be okay, especially because they had each other. But was it enough?
If you're reading this, my love, it means I am no longer with you.
For as long as I could remember, there was an ache. One that you could feel deep within your soul. The type of ache that would keep you awake when your body begged for rest. You learn how to survive with it, but you are also aware that one day it will win. I really wish I was stronger than I ache I feel from within. I wanted to be stronger for you. I never knew what it meant to be loved, nor did I understand how to receive it. Love wasn't something that was present in my childhood. It was something that I believe only existed in made-up stories. That was until I met you. You are unlike anyone I have ever met. Your warm smile every Friday was always the best thing to occur each week. It's something that I looked forward to. You were the only person who saw beyond the mask. You chose to stay instead of running. And you choose to love me. I love you more than anything. I am so sorry for this. Please don't blame yourself. I will always be here with you, rooting for you. I hope you can find someone who can love you properly in ways I could never and live the life that you deserve. You will always be my star. One day, we will meet again.
Love always,
Nabi
The letter was the only thing Nabi left behind for Seonghwa. It was placed carefully on the doormat outside his home. The moment he saw the little envelope waiting outside his door, he knew. Suddenly, the world slowed down around him. The silence wrapped around him in a suffocating way. Every moment they shared together played through his head. Everything seemed so distant now. Guilt slowly crept its way into his mind as deep sadness settled within his soul. Seonghwa loved Nabi more than anything. However, he knew that Nabi was finally resting peacefully. Something that she had always hoped for. He would always hold the love they shared close to his heart and hope that one day they would find their way back to each other.
