When I was a young kid I remember being incredibly angry for some reason, and when some family friends swung by to deliver some gifts I remember enjoying telling them to piss off with their gifts. I felt no gratitude towards them.
When I was a young teen I got a gift from one of my aunts (a kindle). I prefer paper books, and I felt a odd thrill in sending it back to her. I was almost offended she sent me it, even though I know she meant no harm and is a loving person. I felt no gratitude towards her.
When I was at a scholarship ceremony I didn't sit next to my mum because I hated her a lot back then. When I found out she was really upset about me doing this, I felt a thrill.
When I graduated high school I tried to never talk to my parents again, no matter how many times they called my phone. I liked hanging up on them.
When I graduated college (after some repair with the parents had been done) I refused to walk for graduation. This made my mum super upset. I felt a thrill when I heard her crying on the phone. It was even more gratifying when I was able to point out that I was just doing my own thing and she agreed with me that it wasn't a big deal I didn't walk. I had a thrill of finally being seen as right by someone I had fought with and tried to convince for years of ANYTHING.
In a Dungeons and Dragons campaign my PC had the goal of being free to fly and kill the god that kinda cursed his species. My friend (the dungeon master) eventually gave him a set of magic wings so he could fly. I immediately broke them and felt a thrill. "Either all my people can fly, or none of us."
I have repeatedly driven friends away because I will not give in on trying to convince them I am right, even when they are trying so hard to be kind to me. I don't like losing friends, but I kinda feel a thrill each time because 'I outlasted them. I win. They were wrong. They would not see me as correct, or they could not show me how I was wrong.'
