D E F E C T E D

indie botw oc read rules/info written by kou

[yigadefect]

when cira left the yiga hideout, besides trying to forcibly remove the yiga mark on her hand, she also cut her hair. her hair used to be very long, and she’d keep it in a low bun. once she left, she wanted to change her appearance, and the quickest way to do so was cut through her hair with her sword. cira is also a fake name she gave herself, with her real birth name being abandoned the day she defected from the clan.

[yigadefect]

“  i’m trying my best and it’s not good enough. it’s never good enough. ”

misc sentence starters || accepting

“If you’re giving your full effort, then it’s always enough.” Cira would reply. She had that way of thinking when she was younger, putting in 110% and still not thinking it was good enough for her or anyone around her. “Pushing yourself to such lengths can be harmful. Mentally, and even physically.”

[leneemusing]

misc sentence starters

“  i wish i knew how to talk about it.  ”   “  you don’t have to talk, we can just sit together.  ”   “  i don’t want to be alone anymore.  ”   “  i wish i could hate you.  ”  “  take a seat, we’re gonna be here a while.  ” “  i need you to trust me.  ”   “  i missed/miss you.  ”   “  she/he won’t listen to me.  ” “  let me do this for you. please.  ”   “  is there anything else you want to say to me?  ” “  tell me something happy.  ”   “  promise me.  ” “  i just want/wanted to help.  ”   “  let me explain.  ” “  i didn’t/don’t need you to understand, i just wanted/want you to support me.  ”   “  i’m on your side.  ” “  i’ve got your back, okay? ” “  please, tell me you have a plan.  ” “  stay with me tonight.  ” “  don’t go. please.  ”   “  i’ve been alone for so long i’m afraid i don’t know what it’s like not to be.  ”   “  talk to me.  ”   “  i did what i had to do.  ” “  we can’t keep going on like this.  ” “  i’m just tired.  ” “  i’m scared.  ” “  it’s okay to be afraid. fear can be good. use it.  ” “  it’s better to expect disappointment.  ” “  hope is dangerous.  ” “  i like seeing you smile.  ”   “  you look beautiful.  ”   “  be patient with her/him. they’re trying. ”   “  i’m trying my best and it’s not good enough. it’s never good enough. ” “  i’m starting to think i’m just fucked up.  ”   “  have a drink with me.  ” “  she/he is better off without me. but i guess that’s their choice.  ” “  you can’t dictate what’s best for someone else. ” “  can i help you?  ” “  i thought you’d like this.  ” “  do you wanna get out of here?  ” “  walk with me?  ” “  well, shit.  ”

[yigadefect]

She’s sat upon a hill, watching a group of Bokoblins in the distance. They’re all dancing around a fire, greedily gobbling into a large steak shared between the three of them. It seems one encroached on another’s space, and a fight would soon ensue. Ugh... and to think the Yiga considered the minions of Ganon as their ‘allies’.

[yigadefect]

cira’s next wake up call after hearing her father and kohga talking was actually seeing swirling calamity around the castle. while she was allowed out into hyrule since the age of 16 (younger than most yiga are allowed, only due to her skill), she never went anywhere remotely near the castle. there was never an image or a face put to calamity ganon. she knew that they served underneath it, and everything they did was to aid it and its return. those who cowered beneath it or tried to stop it were the enemy. unlike her father and some of the other yiga, she didn’t hold hatred towards the enemies of the yiga. rather, it was an apathy, or indifference. she still would cut down hylians and sheikah as directed by kohga. it didnt bring her joy to do so, nor did it bring her remorse or regret. just apathy. 

she’d seen the swirling calamity around hyrule castle a week into her travels out of the hideout. cira had sat up on a nearby hill, simply watching it for hours. every now and then, she could see a light shining through the darkness, though she wasn’t sure if it was just her mind playing tricks on her after staring for so long. she would later have conversations with people at stables or travelers, some speaking about the calamity and how it had ruined their families lives when it struck. others spoke about how lucky they were to have the princess holding it back for so long, preventing it from reviving and destroying the world. these interactions helped push her to feel disgust towards it, disgust towards herself for revering the calamity for all her years, and disgust towards the yiga for misinforming the youth about the role the calamity played.

[yigadefect]

hey everyone! brand new blog for a botw here that happens to be an ex-yiga clan member, who is still trying to adjust to the world around her after defecting. please like and reblog if you’d be interested in interacting!