“you locked your brother in your cupboard, freaked out and took an axe to the door, matteo!”
he rolled his eyes and threw up his hands, still protesting against their supposed truth. he couldn’t understand why his parents believed he’d do that to his brother, to kieran, the one person in this world that he endlessly respected and loved.
“I would never do that to them!”
just as it had a few times before, the words fell on deaf ears. his mother and father didn’t want to hear it, his sister was in full support of their words and, of course, believed what they were saying. she was encouraging them. kieran wasn’t here, oliver wasn’t here, maven wasn’t here. he had nobody on his side. he’d always been able to cope in the past, the odd comments, the dismissal, being treated like a child had never bothered him before, but this? it felt more like a manhunt.
“you think we don’t know you’ve been taking drugs again? matteo, we know what high looks like!”
he didn’t know what to say, he didn’t know how to argue. they didn’t believe it like gabe did, they didn’t understand that he needed the drugs to get through the day. that he couldn’t sleep without them, write without them, function without them. they didn’t understand that it was stalking him, his own horror story, his biggest fear following him around day in day out. they didn’t understand that kieran’s own had locked them in that cupboard, and all matteo was trying to do was save them, just like they had saved him all those years ago.
the argument was endless, he had nobody there to back him up, nobody willing to agree with him even for the sake of making this conversation end. he was fighting a losing battle, only the repercussions of this battle were much worse than anything else.
matteo had managed to escape for a few hours, heading out to check on kieran. they weren’t okay. somehow, matteo had managed to convince kieran that they could all leave, and he had every plan of sticking to that. they’d tell gabriel they were just getting out of town, they’d leave and he’d see sense enough to know that going back to tombstone wouldn’t do anybody any good. but they’d never see that leave, or at least, matteo wouldn’t.
he arrived home to a packed bag, a lack of choice. he arrived home to his parents sad eyes, and his sister’s judgement. matteo knew he didn’t stand a chance, he couldn’t argue with the points they were making, he couldn’t pass a drug test, and he didn’t have the back up once again.
arriving in a rehab centre smack bang in the middle of tombstone was nobody’s ideal place to be cooped up in, but for matteo, it was hell. it’s not because of the detox, it’s not even because of the other people locked in there with him. it’s the trapped feeling, the stalking getting worse, the days without communication.
it’s day six. visits have been prohibited till today, and it shows. matteo is covered in cuts and bruises, his eyes are sunken, deep, dark. he’s exhausted, at wits end, and even worse than they could have imagined. going cold turkey is hard enough, but with that thing getting closer and closer, matteo has no idea how long he can last.
dakota wasn’t sure how all of this was going to go. he wasn’t even sure if this woman would actually help them but they had to at least try, right? talking someone’s ear off was dakota’s strong suit. playing detective? not so much. “ this happened before, “ dakota confessed, wondering if the woman even knew that, “ when we were kids. people went missing. i talked to nate, briefly, and it seems he knows at least one person who went missing and i’m not saying he knows anything else but…maybe one of his friends does. “
matteo looked back at dakota, his brows creasing together when he decided to go down the truth route, that had never done any of them any good. he pressed his lips together, shifting slightly, crossing his legs over one another and looking over at the woman. “or anything really, we know you’re going through a lot right now, we can’t imagine what it is you’re feeling right now, but any information would be -- so helpful.”
kieran sighed. it was more complicated than that wasn’t it? or maybe it was just complicated for kieran but could they really stay and put matteo at risk. they picked at their jeans, staying quiet before finally bringing themselves to look at matteo. “ okay, “ they spoke, voice quiet. “ we…we can leave. “
it was a long shot, they could make each other a promise right now, a pact, even, just like they had before, and it wouldn’t make a difference. matteo looked into kieran’s eyes and although he knew how desperate the two of them were to leave, he also knew that they had an endlessly loyalty to gabriel, and gabe wasn’t the type of man to leave this town in a mess. he breathed out a sigh and nodded, already defeated, even in confirmation. they were never leaving this place.
matteo nodded his head in agreement, eyebrows lifting ever so slightly, “I think you should too.” if anything, at least they’d be safe, kieran was the glue in their family, to matteo, to their mom and gabe they were the favoured. “just leave, kie… this isn’t worth your life, or sanity.”
kieran couldn’t help but sigh in response. they leaned back, running a hand down their face. “ no. “ kieran couldn’t just leave even if there was a deep part of them that wanted to. it would have been so easy to do but they couldn’t leave with a clear mind about it. “ not…not without you. not without dad. “
“then let’s go,” matteo murmured, “I’m scared and I don’t want to be here anymore.” he hung his head, shaking it, “I don’t want to leave without you but I don’t want to be scared anymore, can we please just go?”
he swallowed, picking at the end of his pant leg, unable to find a way to express how he was feeling, though evidently kieran felt similarly. he straightened up, however, licking his lower lip, “I want this over and done with, I can’t take it anymore.”
the truth was, kieran felt rather numb. it was the same feeling they had when they were a teenager. sure, kieran tried their hardest to fit in but at the end of the day they just felt numb and the only other thing they felt beside that was fear. “ me either, “ kieran almost whispered as they glanced back towards their brother. they took in a breath before letting it out, “ dad…dad wants me to leave. “
matteo nodded his head in agreement, eyebrows lifting ever so slightly, “I think you should too.” if anything, at least they’d be safe, kieran was the glue in their family, to matteo, to their mom and gabe they were the favoured. “just leave, kie... this isn’t worth your life, or sanity.”
matteo nodded, moving towards the edge of kieran’s bed, crossing his legs over one another. “I should have told you — I saw her there but I can’t — I can’t tell when she’s real and when she’s not.” he looked down at his hands, twisting around and twisting around. “mom and dad think — I locked you in there as a joke, then panicked when I couldn’t get you out again…” matteo bit his lower lip, “they asked me if I was high —“ he shook his head, “I’d never do that to you.”
kieran shook their head, “ not your fault. “ it seemed easier to keep their sentences short and sweet but they were sure the frustration was written on their face. they looked back at matteo, “ i know that. “ keiran never once thought that happened. matteo wouldn’t be that cruel and kieran was well aware of what really happened.
he swallowed, picking at the end of his pant leg, unable to find a way to express how he was feeling, though evidently kieran felt similarly. he straightened up, however, licking his lower lip, “I want this over and done with, I can’t take it anymore.”
it wasn’t until the next day that matteo managed to get over to gabe’s, he’d asked for a moment with kieran and josh had taken his leave. he breathed out a small sigh, chewing his lower lip, “are you okay?”
kieran let out a heavy sigh when matteo asked. if they could go the rest of their life without having to speak, that probably would have been a blessing. they knew they could have lied but matteo would have been able to see right through it. “ no, “ kieran spoke quietly. “ i’m not, i’m not okay. “
matteo nodded, moving towards the edge of kieran’s bed, crossing his legs over one another. “I should have told you — I saw her there but I can’t — I can’t tell when she’s real and when she’s not.” he looked down at his hands, twisting around and twisting around. “mom and dad think — I locked you in there as a joke, then panicked when I couldn’t get you out again...” matteo bit his lower lip, “they asked me if I was high —“ he shook his head, “I’d never do that to you.”
it wasn’t until the next day that matteo managed to get over to gabe’s, he’d asked for a moment with kieran and josh had taken his leave. he breathed out a small sigh, chewing his lower lip, “are you okay?”
kieran let out a heavy sigh when matteo asked. if they could go the rest of their life without having to speak, that probably would have been a blessing. they knew they could have lied but matteo would have been able to see right through it. “ no, “ kieran spoke quietly. “ i’m not, i’m not okay. “
matteo nodded, moving towards the edge of kieran’s bed, crossing his legs over one another. “I should have told you — I saw her there but I can’t — I can’t tell when she’s real and when she’s not.” he looked down at his hands, twisting around and twisting around. “mom and dad think — I locked you in there as a joke, then panicked when I couldn’t get you out again...” matteo bit his lower lip, “they asked me if I was high —“ he shook his head, “I’d never do that to you.”
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, if he hadn’t stormed away from kieran earlier, they never would have came looking for him and this wouldn’t have happened. his dad rolled his eyes while his mother frantically looked kieran over, rubbing up and down their arms in an attempt as soothing them. matteo nodded his head, “of course… mom, you should take kieran home. i’ll have josh meet you there… I love you.”
kieran shook their head when matteo apologized. kieran didn’t blame matteo for anything and they didn’t want matteo to blame himself for anything either. “ i love you, “ kieran almost whispered as they looked back at matteo before their mom eventually lead them out of the room.
it wasn’t until the next day that matteo managed to get over to gabe’s, he’d asked for a moment with kieran and josh had taken his leave. he breathed out a small sigh, chewing his lower lip, “are you okay?”
“stop defending him,” his father protested and matteo hung his head, breathing out a sigh. though as kieran went on to explain, as best as they could, to their mother about what happened, matteo found himself stepping around his dad and mom to get to kieran again, “go home — okay? call josh and gabe… or I can? its gonna be okay, we’ll fix it, okay?”
“ i’m not, “ kieran almost hissed. if there was anything they hated was someone telling them to stop defending matteo. how could they not? “ it’s…what happened. “ kieran looked back at matteo when he spoke again before shaking their head. “ not dad… “ they didn’t want him to know. at least not yet. “ j-josh. can you? please. “ the last thing kieran wanted to do was call josh and have to try and explain everything with the way they were speaking.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, if he hadn’t stormed away from kieran earlier, they never would have came looking for him and this wouldn’t have happened. his dad rolled his eyes while his mother frantically looked kieran over, rubbing up and down their arms in an attempt as soothing them. matteo nodded his head, “of course... mom, you should take kieran home. i’ll have josh meet you there... I love you.”
“matteo?!” his parents yelled, but he still ignored them, looking up at kieran with a frown as they stuttered their words. he deflated, but not nearly in enough time. his father grabbed his wrist, “what is wrong with you? you’ve been acting strange since you got here!” matteo pulled back his arm, “are you gonna be okay? you’re shaking.” that was when their mom stepped in, fussing over her oldest.
despite everything going on, kieran still found themselves jumping to matteo’s defense. they shook their head, “ isn’t his fault. “ their attention was immediately turned to their mother. they attempted to cover it up as they took in a deep breath and glanced back towards the closet. “ g-got – “ they paused, mostly out of frustration, “ got stuck, “ they spoke again. “ tight spaces. “ they wondered if their mother remembered their claustrophobia. “ my fault. i….i freaked out. probably….probably scared him. i’m sorry. “
“stop defending him,” his father protested and matteo hung his head, breathing out a sigh. though as kieran went on to explain, as best as they could, to their mother about what happened, matteo found himself stepping around his dad and mom to get to kieran again, “go home — okay? call josh and gabe... or I can? its gonna be okay, we’ll fix it, okay?”
the commotion appeared to have drawn attention, matteo scrambled at the broken door, “kie? kieran, I’m here. it can’t get to us both, okay? he reached through the door, splinters of the door tearing at his arms but he didn’t care. his mother and father burst into the room, a look of terror on their faces, “matteo, what are you doing?” they gasped, but he ignored them, driving the axe into the wood again until it fell from it’s hinges. he pulled kieran out and wrapped his arms tightly around them, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have let you go in there.”
kieran knew they weren’t alone in that closet but they refused to look behind them just like they had refused to look before. they were practically frozen in fear and their initial reaction was almost to jerk away from matteo. they didn’t realize, at first, that they were shaking. “ it’s n-not your fault. “
“matteo?!” his parents yelled, but he still ignored them, looking up at kieran with a frown as they stuttered their words. he deflated, but not nearly in enough time. his father grabbed his wrist, “what is wrong with you? you’ve been acting strange since you got here!” matteo pulled back his arm, “are you gonna be okay? you’re shaking.” that was when their mom stepped in, fussing over her oldest.
“kieran, don’t do that!” matteo protested, but it was too late. for a moment, it seemed like it would be okay, his lips curving ever so slightly in a relieved smile before the door slammed shut, separating the two of them. he screamed, jumping up to pull on the door, “kieran! kieran I can’t — no, no!” matteo scarpered into the other room, grabbing the axe from a spare room, returning back. “stay back! kieran! I’m gonna get you out, stand back!” he yelled out, launching the axe into the door without a second thought.
what kieran felt in that moment was all too familiar even if it had been a long time since they had been in this position. they remembered how scared they were, how their hands went red from banging on the door so hard, and they remembered the feeling of nails dragging on their skin. the last thing kieran wanted to do was move further back into the closet but it seemed as if they had no choice as matteo launched the axe into the door.
the commotion appeared to have drawn attention, matteo scrambled at the broken door, “kie? kieran, I’m here. it can’t get to us both, okay? he reached through the door, splinters of the door tearing at his arms but he didn’t care. his mother and father burst into the room, a look of terror on their faces, “matteo, what are you doing?” they gasped, but he ignored them, driving the axe into the wood again until it fell from it’s hinges. he pulled kieran out and wrapped his arms tightly around them, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have let you go in there.”
matteo followed kieran’s gaze and while dread slowly began to suffocate him, his features remained expressionless, “no, no it wasn’t,” his voice was just as monotone as he looked. he looked back to kieran and frowned, “looks like she isn’t in my head after all, huh?”
“ she was never in your head, “ kieran breathed out, eyes still on the closet. kieran was well aware that they could ignore it, hell, they could have moved to a different room but did kieran really want to be that person that was scared of closets. ‘ fuck it, “ they murmured under their breath, moving to get off the bed. they hesitated for a moment before pulling the closet door open and stepping in to turn off the light. nothing. they let out the breath they didn’t realize they were holding but it seemed as if the moment kieran turned to walk out the door slammed on them and the light shut off. “ matteo, “ kieran attempted to keep their voice steady, yanking on the door to open it but it wouldn’t budge, “ matteo open the door. “
“kieran, don’t do that!” matteo protested, but it was too late. for a moment, it seemed like it would be okay, his lips curving ever so slightly in a relieved smile before the door slammed shut, separating the two of them. he screamed, jumping up to pull on the door, “kieran! kieran I can’t — no, no!” matteo scarpered into the other room, grabbing the axe from a spare room, returning back. “stay back! kieran! I’m gonna get you out, stand back!” he yelled out, launching the axe into the door without a second thought.
maybe in a way dakota could understand. he never quite forgot the smiling man and after seeing him again, dakota was almost afraid to look outside at night afraid he’d be there watching him. he let out a heavy breath, “ i hate the sketch book but it’s not here. i don’t exactly carry it out with me day to day but i have it at home if you want to drop by. “
matteo nodded his head, licking his lower lip, “thanks -- when you go home, can you call me?” he patted dakota’s shoulder, moving out of the kitchen and heading back up the stairs. he didn’t hear from or see dakota till he was brought along to sweet talk the parents of the kid that had most recently gone missing.
“no, mrs collins, we’re not with the police, just -- concerned citizens, you know?” matteo wasn’t all that worried about pissing her off, not now that they’d discussed the ins and outs.
“ matteo, “ dakota breathed out his name. “ why do you want to remember her? “ out of everyone, matteo was probably the only one who ever asked to see the drawings especially now. “ you really want to open up that can of worms? “
matteo shook his head, almost as if in disbelief that he wasn’t understood, “remember her?” he repeated, “no, I never forgot her... I just can’t tell if she’s real or not.” his eyes drifted towards the back door, she stood there, frame pressed against the glass, empty sockets somehow managing to appear as though they were boring into his soul, “she’s always been with me,” he managed a sad sort of laugh, “maybe because a piece of me has always been with her.”
kieran took in a deep breath and slowly let it out. “ yeah, we are. “ they looked back at their brother offering a small smile but it didn’t stay there as their gaze raised. “ was your closet door always open? “ maybe it was a weird question and in most circumstances it would have been.
matteo followed kieran’s gaze and while dread slowly began to suffocate him, his features remained expressionless, “no, no it wasn’t,” his voice was just as monotone as he looked. he looked back to kieran and frowned, “looks like she isn’t in my head after all, huh?”
