Thought I Changed This

old lady freaking out about otome

[dear-mrs-otome]

What made you dislike Rio? How complex is his relationship with Silvio?

I'm just slapping this whole spoilery thing behind a cut:

As a person I don't necessarily dislike Rio. I think he has many admirable qualities and at heart he's a caring, kind man. But for me personally, when it comes to Rio in a romantic sense, I find him clingy, entitled, overprotective, and manipulative.

I dislike how he gatekeeps Emma and access to her, is borderline obsessed, and how he feels entitled to continually make his feelings HER problem and to forever shove them in her face when she's made her disinterest or her intent to keep him as just a friend VERY clear. I get secondhand embarrassment every time he spouts off about his love and Emma does her best to placate him, clearly feeling uncomfortable.

I dislike how it takes him an entire route of his own to even remotely stop sticking his head in the sand and pretending that he can go on ignoring everything about his past, especially since we know he has an inkling of the truth the first time he and Silvio speak. Some people might find it romantic that he's willing to just ignore any past he might have in favor of staying with Emma but to me that's irresponsible, childish, and downright disrespectful to Emma - she deserves the truth, and to be able to make a fully informed decision about their future.

As for he and Silvio....ridiculously complex doesn't even begin to describe it. They're textbook love/hate - Rio is rightfully traumatized by the things that Silvio's done to him in the past, and still tries to do (taking away the things that Rio loves) but by the same token, he has no idea of the things Silvio's done to try and protect him, and how a lot of Silvio's behavior stems from envy and feeling (rightfully) overlooked in favor of Rio being the king's darling favorite who can do no wrong. Silvio wants to hate Rio, but more than anything I think what frustrates him is seeing Rio be favored and feeling that Rio doesn't deserve it - he calls Rio a coward and always tries to provoke him into standing up for himself more, because he wants to see Rio be a stronger person and worthy of being a prince of Benitoite.

[yotome]

Why am I not a fan of Rio? Let me count the ways ... or wait, let @dear-mrs-otome write it out in a more intelligent fashion.

[yotome]

Can't Unsee (Also Known as Ugh, My Brain)

This post will not be helpful in any meaningful way. This post is not smart, or long, or edifying. If you are the type to spoil yourself, the content of this post may be something you have already thought of. But I can't get it out of my BRAIN. If there is ONE PERSON out there who shares the same problem, know that I FEEL FOR YOU. We are in the same boat.

Gilbert spoilers. Spoilers.

SPOOOIIIIYYYLEERRRZZZ

(can't say I didn't warn you)

What everyone else sees ...

(Screencap by @viatagrinner)

What I can't stop seeing:

[yotome]

Cynic seeks route to experience actual emotions

(minor not very important spoilers for Sariel)

My first route was Clavis. He's actually the reason I started Ikepri, and I liked him much more than I thought I would - I tore through that storyline twice like nobody's business! In other words, he set a pretty dang high standard.

Next, there was Chevalier. Gotta understand Chevalier to understand Clavis, right? I got through both runs in decent time, though occasionally Chev's MC over-otomed me, and I would have to take a recovery break to handle my alarmingly berserk blood pressure.

I read one of Leon's routes after that, and he seemed like a cool dude. I wasn't sure if I wanted to do both, though, so I tried Yves. He is baby.

I next landed on Sariel's route. It had just been released, after all, plus he's purple and wears glasses for extra cool points. It didn't seem to be going much of anywhere for me at the start, but hey, you never know! It could ramp up!

Then I got to the first hint of romance, and ...

Oh. She fell off something (stairs? ladder? the floor?) because otome, but held onto her books also because otome because she treasures them greatly. He's kinda touched by the strength of her passions overcoming the instinctive fear of a fall, or something (i.e. she didn't catch herself). She thinks he's hot and possibly morally questionable. Yes, honey, he is both. He wouldn't wear a pant leg made of belts if he was just some normal guy.

I tried to go "aww" but found the impulse utterly missing. I wasn't even irritated, weirdly enough. Hello? Heart? You still in there?

... No response.

At that point, I stopped reading his route. I didn't change to another suitor, as I kept telling myself that I'd resume in a little bit. Of course, life happened, and there were days where I forgot to log in ... which is when the app started doing THIS:

The first time it happened: I guess that's kinda cute.

The secondish time: You already told me that.

The ??? time: Dammit Sariel, get over the punishment gag already. What are you, a minister or a one-trick pony??

The most recent time: YOU THINK YOU CAN PUNISH ME, DO YOU? FOOL. YOU HARDLY KNOW THE MEANING OF THE WORD. I'LL MAKE YOU TALK TO CLAVIS FOR 24 HOURS STRAI... hold up, am I getting dramatic at an app notification??

So I'm thinking that's a sign I probably should change routes now. :D (And block the notifications.) I just don't have a particular route I really want to start at the moment, so I must ponder. I am leaning towards avoiding Nokto, mostly because I Strongly. Dislike. Suitors. Getting all up in my MC's space, and I just have A Bad Feeling About This (TM) when it comes to him.

That still leaves:

Jin "I like the tiddies so much I got my own set" Grandet, either route

Leon, who is definitely a Good Guy but his armor looks too loose somehow, round 2

The actual Muffin Man, Yves*, round 2

Licht, who I understand has some Srs Probbems, either route

Luke "Eh" Randolph, who seems eh in turn?, either route

Or heck, I could just ride the roller coaster of bad decisions made with the best of intentions again. You do you in every route and event, Clavis, and I appreciate that. You do you.

*it is only thanks to this game that I know "Yves" is pronounced "eve." Not all "Yeh-ves" weird like I'd been saying it FOR MY ENTIRE LIFE. Thanks, otome! The more you know.

** I did not know anyone named Yves, so I never heard the name said out loud and just ... well, I'm gonna pronounce all the letters I see written unless someone tells me otherwise. That's how my brain rolls.

[yotome]

Twst the Knife

Two weeks ago: Oh, this is Twisted Wonderland? I don't know how I feel about Disney, but ...

One week and a million non-plot-related fanfics later: Hmm, I think I like Malleus. Intelligent dark lonely figure who needs a big big hug? Yes, that's my type. Fangs extra plus. No, please leave the extra yandere on the side, I think he's too smart for that on the regular. Sure, please sign me up for the Give a Gargoyle a Hug reward program. I will donate extra.

Today: Welp I picked a REAL INTERESTING TIME to like this particular character, didn't I

[yotome]

Based on a thorough study that consumed minutes of my life

I am convinced Gilbert's shirt has shoulderpads.

[yotome]

Once a bias, always a bias

Cybird: We've noticed you haven't spent any money with us lately.

Me: Uh, well, that's ...

Cybird: So, here's Clavis in an event!

Me: Urgh ... they know my weakness! I must ... resist ...

Fandom: COLLECTIVE OMG THIS EVENT IS GREAT

Me: DAMMIT.

Presenting, my three favorite, most ridiculous context-free screenshots. (Under a cut.) They do not involve Chevalier or his sword.

It's a best seller in otome-land. No one ever reads it, of course, but it's on nearly everyone's bookshelf.

THE @pieground BENTO POST IS REAL, IT'S CANON NOW YOU GUYS

POV: You just opened the bento box Clavis prepared for you

And it's staring back at you.

[yotome]

Lelouch University would be the freaking best thing ever.

The school has an unparalleled spirit of intellectual creativity, and is open to new and unusual ways of thinking

It's forgiving of failure - you can try again as long as you don't drop out

It boasts a wide variety of classes, ranging from advanced Chemistry to Comedic Timing 101

The school's nursing program has made astounding advances in the field of emergency medicine, as they are provided a continual supply of patients thanks to the prank program

Somehow at least half the school library is on (legal?) loan from the Palace - no one knows for sure how the books got out the Palace doors, but the campus legends speak of Prince Clavis and a [redacted], which [redacted] and then [redacted] [redacted]

There's a surprise world-leading horticultural school being developed there, with new varieties of roses and medicinal plants being dreamed up and made into reality

The university's founder invented the concept of patents

The university's founder, coincidentally, holds the world's first patent on the fire extinguisher (among other things)

The university holds the world's first record for the most fire extinguishers used in a single fire

[violettduchess]

[yotome]

AMEN

AAAAMMMEEEENNNNNN

Rio's brand of supportiveness makes me want to: A.) Run for the hills

B.) Cringe

C.) Give him a better haircut

D.) All of the above

[yotome]

Mapping it Out (Completely Cracked Headcanon)

Every time I read something about Obsidian wanting Rhodolite for its productive farmland, I keep thinking ... really?  Not to be rude or anything, but on the map, Rhodolite's the size of the Vatican.  Or maybe Luxembourg.   Nobody's looking at Luxembourg and going, "yes, THAT'S the breadbasket for the biggest nations in Europe!"

Rich fields or no, if you're expecting the land of Rhodolite to feed a significant portion of the comparatively enormous Obsidian, I just don't know if there's enough dang space for that. (Especially if we're in some sort of Fancy Fantasy Medieval timeline.) 

So that got me thinking.   What if the map we see in-game is wrong? What if it's actually just really distorted, because accurate mapmaking in this era is hard?  What are the chances that Rhodolite is bigger than it appears?

For example, this is an early map of the Americas.  (Yeah, this is a couple hundred years after our supposedly Fancy Fantasy Medieval time period, but whatev):

(https://www.nypl.org/collections/nypl-recommendations/guides/historical-maps-north-america)

They were trying to be super accurate, right?  It's not completely off the mark. But when you look at a modern map, the distortion of the old map becomes clear:

(https://www.geographicguide.com/)

So maybe, in reality, Rhodolite looks like this!

[yotome]

100% Dysfunctional Relationship

Me: I still haven't forgiven you, you know.

Gacha: Try again. You never know.

Me: Not until you say you're sorry.

Gacha: Look, I can't apologize for the way I am. Just ... try again, will you?

Me: FINE, UGH. Think of @omkookie's cat's lucky paws. Think of lucky cat paws. Lucky paws. Cute lucky cat paws.

Gacha:

Me:

Gacha:

[yotome]

"gutted by gacha" (or, "nothing new under the sun")

Chibi snowman Clavis? Nope. Haha didn't even get to try at this one - totally ran out of the monies and then ran out of time.

Clavis building a deformed snowman? Nope. Got Rio'd. Least favorite suitor. If he showed up at my door in a Santa hat, there's a high probability I'd turn off all the lights and pretend not to be home.

Clavis in sexy purple suit looking sassy as heck? Nope. Somehow ended up with two - TWO - Chevaliers!

Adult Me: I'm fine, totally fine. They're just pictures on an app and weren't really a need, only something I wanted because I enjoyed the pictures. It's probably good I put a limit on how much money I was going to spend, and good that I stuck with it! Yeah! That's right! I adulted good! I respect me!

Inner Child Me: BUT I WANTED IT!! YOUR RESPECT IS MEANINGLESS IN THE FACE OF MY DISAPPOINTMENT!!

And to top it all off, the bebe Clavis + Sariel story is the last reward for the current collection event. Ikeprince, you are KILLING MEEEEE.

[yotome]

Proper IkePrince Terminology

I present to you an entire tangent inspired by the fact that I've pulled ten or so of the same low-level Nokto card somehow. Also, HOW on earth can I explain three five-star CHEVALIER cards in two weeks when all I want is CLAVIS!? That's just ... so plot-appropriate it's WRONG, is what it is!

What's the right term to use if you (somehow) encounter a group made up of a lot of a single love interest?

A rack of Jins

A perfection of Chevaliers

A flustercluck of Clavises

A lotta Leons

A sweet of Yveseses

A beam of Lichts

A nudge of Nokto (Noktos? Notcti?)

A snooze of Lukes

A surprise of Keiths

A jangle of Silvios / A shiny of Silvios

A buffet of Gilberts / A murder of Gilberts

A regular of Rios

A nightmare fuel of Sariels

Bonus thought:

A nobility of Cyrans

[yotome]

Thought I knew myself ...

Me: I'm smart and mature. I understand the concept of microtransactions. I know you can actually spend a lot of money that way, and that's part of any game's goal. I won't fall for that trap!

Also Me:

[yotome]

I NEED IT BUT APPARENTLY I CAN'T HAVE IT

[yotome]

THE DEFINITION:

he·don·ism /ˈhēdəˌnizəm,ˈhedənˌizəm/

noun the pursuit of pleasure; sensual self-indulgence.

THE REALITY: Clavis pursues fun and enjoys instigating drama, but you never see Clavis actually being a hedonist in the most common use of the term - those pleasures such as physical intimacy, food, drink, etc. DIY pit traps? That takes effort. Manipulating people? Also work, frankly. Being a total class clown combined with drama queen does not mean that he is, in fact, a hedonist too.

Even if you decide to count his pursuit of emotionally empty entertainment as hedonism, is that "every waking moment" line really true ...? Between paperwork, handling Chevalier while simultaneously attempting to get Chevalier killed, saving everybody but himself, procuring banana peels, and his own chemistry (culinary?) experiments, this boy is simply Too Damn Busy for that hedonist lifestyle.

So WTF, Nokto? 🤔

THEORY 1: Nokto has bought into the rumors Clavis likes to spread - basically, that he's the ultimate gentleman who will spare no effort to keep his desires sated. (Let people think what they will about what those desires actually are.)

THEORY 2: As a fellow member of the foreign policy faction, Nokto knows that Clavis is busy AF, but he also knows that Clavis totally WISHES he could be a hedonist. There's currently no gain in Nokto popping that bubble, thus, Nokto is just "well, I guess I'll give him this one."

THEORY 3: Nokto is BS-ing Emma because he knows she'll buy it.

THEORY 4: I'm overthinking Clavis while reading someone else's route. Sorry, Leon.

[yotome]

I found a thing

This is an actual sign I found. I'm guessing the business that owns it had no idea why I was standing outside taking pictures and laughing. 🤷‍♀️

[ambrosiallkiss]

Never give up!

(A quick doodle because Clavis stole my heart in his route ^^)

[yotome]

Is Clavis:

A.) hot

B.) the best

C.) so full of problems

D.) so full of goodness

E.) all of the above

He's like ... the worst prankster because he targets everyone, but also the best meddler because he targets everyone.