Zachary Birchley

A place for me to collect my ramblings.

[zacharybirchley]

everyone here

[zacharybirchley]

23/03/15

[zacharybirchley]

56

This year and 7 months has not healed anything your absence is still sore confusing yet gentle a gentle flooring the tears are still, day by day creakingly present constantly prodding the sockets you slipped away as quietly as whatever else happened that minute you left, while the world arrived and you became motionless it was the longest minute of my life until the nurse spoke and I slipped out out of my own head, to watch from above thank you for the embrace as you left as you slipped silently out in that minute today would have been your birthday only your 56th and there is no pattern there is no reason only a void of understanding sense here it seems is an alien language along with your life and our happiness I understand where you are but it makes nothing easier flowers laid, families argue and no-one asks me “how are you?”

[zacharybirchley]

10/15

I ache with missing you More than I am able to say I feel a cascading on my ribs Knocking the air from myself Ripping oxygen from my day And keeping me nervous for this

So the suns been taken from my sky but it cannot be denied that I am still here I am still, here Still walking, still driving, still living This fist still beats me forward evenly my dragging feet don't hold any of this at bay So when I reclaim my light the weight is lifted off this tired chest and moment to moment hour to hour day by day I recover and relive, revive and move again These feelings are only as strong As the passions I hold for you

[zacharybirchley]

I only needed one word.

[zacharybirchley]

a long time after

I will swallow this Confusion, as sure as the sun will leak in and find me awake, as sure as the dawn will sober my mind, as sure as when light floods this room it will make me your friend. Dreams are real in this velvet light while the sun stirs, before night has extinguished its purple clouds, where fantasy runs rife.

[zacharybirchley]

A thought

I think that we are trained and conditioned to think in terms of completion and totality because they are two qualities that are akin to the correct attitude needed when trying to conform (or conforming regardless of deliberate, conscious agency or otherwise) to that of the capitalist rule. Convenient? People thus for the most part remain confounded when trying to discover life and actually think. Individuals are praised with a sense of completion and achievement and closure when ticking all the membership boxes for the capitalist employment club. So to the subordinate mind which one is more rewarding?  My main problem is in-fact not entirely with the presence and implications of Capitalist society but rather with how it presents itself in such a seemingly unchallengeable way, a way in which that people are rendered unable to challenge posing pre-set concrete for themselves. I am not suggesting any alternative or even saying that I believe there is one that would work, but the fact remains that it is important to challenge it, in order, almost to feel alive and establish a sense of self in retaliation.

[zacharybirchley]

a taste.

ZB 2015

[zacharybirchley]

apt

I can't keep your voice out of my head All I hear are the many echoes of The darkest words you said And it's driving me crazy I can't find the best in all of this But I'm always looking out for you 'Cause you're the one I miss And it's driving me crazy

[zacharybirchley]

the nervous repetition of lack

[zacharybirchley]

John Brown

Old Skipper, alone, but alive. He leaves himself to it, leaves himself to himself, and lets his body live its life.

[zacharybirchley]

This has been brimming in me for about 18 months, just a sketch at the moment.

2007-2011 ...and now we are alone. A distant, desperate child a cry for fellowship both wasted and fractured denied and 'un self defined' why is everything always such an effort why the fuck is this no longer any fun? this is amazing, but ruined pure, but fucked Loud, but dead over, but alive. walk away and plan to pick up you walked away and didn't tell anyone don’t tell but leave for the guessers the anxious guessers of the future this leaves me numb and jealous leaving numb ends ends are numbing too no one ‘cares a care?’ except everyone here every soul every shout ever shiver. now: stop being a victim and get out

[zacharybirchley]

Old Man Skip

  The man alone the most Standing as still as stone, I ask myself, does he want to die?

He never talks, there are only grunts with silent movements, his lips in constant, mournful song. Sounding out the old notes, bending out the life he once lived, songs he hasn't forgotten, arrangements that keep old skip, ticking.

Old man skip stares as if he has nothing left Old man skip coughs as if he wants out and needs to stop guttural, deep and like that of not a man I think he is trying to end, trying to die without suicide, To be this lonely, why not get a little lonelier?

This is a place where only your own bodily gestures keep you company. Resting with both arms, then one then the other then head in hands, the silent songs return.

Old man skip sings his words through his pursed, old, fractured lips. No one hears them, they don't exist,  they are only for him.

[zacharybirchley]

....

Swift apparently intended all words of the Houyhnhnm language to echo the neighing of horses.

[zacharybirchley]

For My Grandad: John Birchley (1920-2007)

[zacharybirchley]

Perfect Creativity.

http://opi-toymakergirl.blogspot.co.uk/ Amazing! 

[zacharybirchley]