on the beach

All that sweet content.

[musashi]

Hey can you guys reblog Cheeseburger so he can take a sunbeam nap on lots of blogs. No other reason I just want you guys to see him.

[wizardpotions]

i feel like tumblr doesnt know about the pain and suffering that is english tap water,,,, girl there are stalagmites inside me

[monarchofrymden]

Lmao op lives in the south. The tap water up here is from fucking springs. It's so clean and fresh and has no stalagmites whatsoever. Cope and seethe southerner

[wizardpotions]

My bones are so strong from all the chalk I've been drinking that I could mull you into a fine paste

[astronomical-bagel]

You guys are like a two hour drive from each other

[theindestructiblelittlemy]

is it just me or is NASA weirdly aggressive in their article about black holes?

can a black hole destroy the earth?

no, you idiot.

black holes aren’t planet gluttons, you bitch.

and the earth isn’t some weak-ass planet that would just fall in to a black hole like a sucker.

and that dumbass sun that we’ve got isn’t big enough to make a black hole like other stars.

you fool.

[randomslasher]

This reads like an exhausted doctor explaining that no, you fucking moron, vaccines do not cause autism. 

[methotrex8]

[nitrosplicer]

Fully losing it at this facebook screenshot. 22 inches of green and 1.5 of carrot.

[spicymochi]

neapolitan mice cream cones

[cannibalchicken]

[sushigirlfriend]

[creative-anchorage]

[deviika]

— William Chapman

[x3nshit]

love is choice. show up. consistently.

[anexperimentallife]

[modogoblin]

[theegosystem-deactivated2024012]

the worst is wanting to create and create and create but being trapped in a body that is so so so so tired

[micro-usb-deactivated20230625]

[disast3rtransp0rt]

As someone who took etiquette lessons, politeness is an incredibly effective tool for disarming bigots. You can either force them to reconsider their words/actions by directly and calmly confronting their behavior (by using the rules of society in your favor), or you can dip entirely while they appear to be in the wrong.

Both options are great.

Because the thing is, when bigots pick fights, they are 100% counting on you to get louder than them. Or meaner. They want you to react emotionally and provide fodder for their 'You're Too Emotionally Immature To Understand' cannon.

What they aren't expecting you to do is say one of the following phrases in a polite, concerned tone:

Are you okay?

That's not the kind of language I was raised to use with others.

Do you need a moment to think on why that wasn't acceptable?

This is no way to engage in intelligent conversation. Please try that again in a kinder tone if you'd like this to continue. (I really like this one because it lets you turn their public-shame rhetoric around)

For those of you who'd are spiteful and/or dealing with Fundamentalists/Evangelicals/generally shitty Christians:

What's happening in your life to cause you this much anger? I can't imagine hurting so badly that I need to hurt other people.

Who taught you it was acceptable to treat other people this way? Certainly not the Jesus I remember.

Whatever happened to 'judge not lest ye be judged'?

If I talked like that in front of my parents or grandparents I would be ashamed.

I think there's something you need to pray on before we try and have this conversation.

And my all time favorite:

"It sounds to me like there are some seriously dark and angry forces at work in your heart."

(Nothing stops a Christian bigot in their tracks faster than implying the Devil is causing their bigotry. But you MUST be calm, polite, and gentle with your tone and wording. It is absolutely fair to twist the rules and play them at their own game, but you gotta play hard.)

TLDR: It's much faster to use etiquette, politeness, and rhetoric reversal when eviscerating idiots online and in person, because they aren't expecting you to weaponize their behaviors back in their direction. Don't get angry, get spitefully polite! :)

[krystal-prisms]

My favourite one is "Do you think that this is a normal/acceptable thing to say/do?"

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

If I may once again dip my toe into the discourse surrounding Greek Mythology, a lot of people like to rewrite or reframe the story of Medusa, and that’s great! Highly encourage it. But, DON’T YOU DARE GO AND DEMONIZE MY BOY PERSEUS!

Perseus isn’t some vile misogynist who hunts down and murders Medusa for the hell of it. He’s a scared kid who’s trying to save his mom from a forced marriage (whom herself has been a victim of terrible abuse from her father) to a creepy evil king and gets duped by the Gods into cleaning up their mess for them. He’s not the villain, he’s just another pawn. So if I see one more motherfucker trying to make him out to be the “real monster” I will throw hands.

You know what would be way more interesting?! Medusa sees Perseus rolling up to her crib and freaks out cause ‘holy shit this is a fucking kid. a fucking toddler with a sword and shield.’ and they hash it out and then TEAM UP to kill the evil kind trying to force marry Perseus’ mother! Think of the dynamics that you could write! The interactions that could occur. I mean, one of ‘em is gonna have to wear a blindfold but hey, minor problems.

What I’m saying is, gimme a buddy cop movie where Perseus and Medusa team up to fight evil in Ancient Greece.

[thebestworstidea]

I’m just picturing Perseus as this fairly well built sixteen year old kid, who looks a little underfed, and he’s like ‘ma’am I’m so sorry, I have to bring your head back to save my mom’ and medusa is like ‘okay, start over. We can work with this’ and compare trauma over some watered wine.

[inkandarsenic]

Danae and Medusa can get married and Perseus can have TWO Badass Moms

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

[kyraneko]

Okay but consider: Perseus regretfully tells Medusa he has to bring back her head to save his mother from a forced marriage and Medusa cocks her head and says “did the bastard say the rest of me couldn’t be attached?” and long story short Perseus rocks up with a Lady-Gaga-esque entourage of men carrying this gigantic silver platter with a giant metal cloche on top of it and announces it to his mother’s tormentor as the head of Medusa, and dude lifts it up and Perseus finishes, “and also the rest of her” and fucker turns to stone.

[gothcostco]

[agentumbls]

VIOLENCE!!!!

[steampunktendencies]

Old Mill. Wow!

[butchflirt]

[dont-pray-for-my-sins]

remember, a hard hat and a hi-vis vest, and a friend with their own hard hat, hi-vis vest and a clipboard, and you can get away with all sorts of things

just remember that if anyone asks, act irritated that you were called in on your day off because the guy who was supposed to do it fell sick, then catch yourself and say “anyway, no time to chat, i got a quota to meet” before grumbling about how you should have listened to your mother.

[anarchopuppy]

That bar is to prevent unhoused people from sleeping there, for anyone who doesn’t understand why we’re removing it

[yesperono]

this is like the eighth time I’ve seen this post and it took me until now to realize they mean recycle the metal bar and use the money you get for it to buy food, not that you should eat the bar 🤦‍♂️

[deathtokillian]

Eat the bar to assert dominance

[discodeerdiary]

In my experience a lot of these have a standard nut and bolt instead of an Allen head screw which means you can use an adjustable wrench to take them off. When in doubt, check a day or so before you do the deed.

[tetrachromiahedron]

Looks like the anti-houseless bench post image is gone now. Huh.

[anarchistmemedistro]

[mysharona1987]

[okiitos]

Rescue professional here:

If you need rescuing or help, DON’T FUCKING MOVE. You are so much easier to find when you stay put.

[thegreenpea]

Credits: @foxes-in-love

Your most important survival skill is asking for help

[existential-dread-in-the-am]

Goddamn preach this

[rogue-cyberman]

"Your most important survival skill is asking for help." THIS, it makes me so damn pissed off when parents try and normalize that asking for help is a taboo thing!