The Silence is Coming

[queerbeerz]

I am screAMING

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

a collection of underrated tweets, part 4

(the series)

[shencomix]

[mugica]

im about to test the limits of discord nitro

[mugica]

we are almost there folks

[mugica]

discord you can lag all you want but you arent going to stop me from fitting the entire bee movie into a 50 MB gif.

[mugica]

Let me win, you fool.

[mugica]

is this how we play this game? very well.

[mugica]

[mugica]

my friends support me. i know within my heart. i can do it.

[mugica]

I did it…. I did it everyone. I’m the happiest person in the world.

[sunnybuttercup]

Thanks American Girl!

[humorhour]

[atlas-prime]

Yeah, the coconut’s

[queen-ofxthe-clouds]

I’ve been laughing at this stupid fucking video for 30 minutes

[the-last-of-the-frosty-boys]

Yall sont understand this is the funniest thing ive experienced in weeks

[fish-food-s]

holy fucking shit

[isakthesnake]

@punchmelouis

[foulserpent]

[farmfreshmemes]

[nerdeas]

[autistichalfblood]

Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Austere Academy - part 1

[teenscoolest]

me: I really!!!! want!!! people!!!! to help!!!! me with!!!! my problems!!!!!!!

brain: you have to tell people about your problems first.

me: disgusting. atrocious. completely repugnant. I have never heard anything so vile. get out of my sight immediately.

[ruinedchildhood]

[babyanimalgifs]

this husky is mad because he wants to take a bath but isn’t allowed to

[beebossinner-deactivated2023102]

let my poor baby take his bath

[melissa-anne-rose-deactivated20]

If y'all really knew. If y'all really knew what utter drama queens huskies are this wouldn’t surprise you at all.

This is my life.

[tinyelfperson]

Literally my husky is the same way. He’s only a few months and he’ll cry to go back outside after being in the house two seconds.

[fractiousrvt]

I once ran out of my house in my pajamas at 2 in the fucking morning because I heard a dog screaming like it had been hit by a car. As I’m pelting towards the road barefoot I see an open garage with two people standing there and a husky in the back of a truck. I slowed down and asked them if that noise had been their dog.

Heavily embarrassed they admitted that it was. The reason for the godawful tortured sound the dog had made?

“We took his running harness off.”

And that was the moment I vowed to never own a husky.

[grison-in-labs]

I frequently pet sit for a friend’s husky, who is completely normal and unremarkable for her kind with one crucial exception.

She is dumb as soup.

(You didn’t hear that from me: her owner thinks she’s a genius, bless him.)

Anyway, my dog Tribble thinks Arya the husky is one of her very own adopted babies, so she stays with us fairly often. Reasons I have heard this dog dissolve into a screaming, wailing meltdown include:

I followed my buddy up a mildly steep hill and now she’s gone and I can’t figure out how to get down

That one cat won’t be friends with me even though all the others will

I hopped up on the sofa and the hardwood floor next to it is much more confusing than the laminate I have lived on since I was two months old and I don’t know how to get down

I’m mildly bored and my buddy yelled at me when I tried to bite her neck for the zillionth time

I want to play with that potted plant but you said I couldn’t

I’m overcome with joy because you took me on a walk to the hardware store

I want that biscuit but I forgot what sit means and now I’m frustrated

I haven’t seen you in two weeks and I forgot you weren’t dead and I’m overjoyed

You are not petting me enough

You are not petting me at all

I got lost four times in five minutes on the off leash trail and now you won’t let me off again for a while

There’s a brush and I need it

You made eye contact with me and didn’t immediately drop everything to pet me

She’s a very good dog, and she’s a sweet dog who is never offended by anything, but the screaming has singlehandedly ensued I will never, ever, ever own a husky. I like having functioning ears too much.

[violent-darts]

To be fair, you and your friend may both be right: huskies, like border-collies, are just intelligent enough to develop Exciting Cognitive Neuroses, much like a toddler, which frankly dumber dogs will skip because they don’t actually have quite enough extra cognitive space to think up ways to be utterly fucking ridiculous. 

I kind of suspect this is going on here in part because of the dog being so very specifically upset that the one cat won’t be friends, despite all the other cats being friends, and also the overcome-with-joy bits: you’ll notice they’re very similar to what makes toddlers randomly cry for no reason. 

Where a bulldog doesn’t care about the difference between laminate and hardwood, a husky is just smart enough to get VERY CONCERNED ABOUT HOW THESE ARE SUBTLY DIFFERENT AND POSSIBLY IT MEANS THAT GETTING DOWN WILL BE A TOTALLY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE AAAAAUGH! and get hysterically anxious about it. 

“Smarter”, in animals as in humans, does not actually always mean “more sensible.” XD 

[cryoverkiltmilk]

I was feeling very lonely this evening and now I’m laughing down to my belly so thank you for this post

[dwgif]

If I destroy this planet, I destroy the gravity field, the rocket…the rocket loses protection and falls into the black hole…I have to sacrifice Rose.

[books-in-order]

Pup interrupts soccer match, gives interview.

[the-stray-liger]

The commentator narrating the pup’s moves with the ball is AMAZING and I’m crying

[loseinadaydream]

“(…) right, but he decides to kick the ball. He gets close, and who grabs it? The Friend(dog)! Yes! A pup got into the field. He’s tied to it. He puts it under his paws and shows what football was missing in the Gasometro (field’s name). The [team]’s men want to grab him, but they cant! The Friend has his eyes on the ball. He runs to find it again. Yes! He bites! He kneads! He wants it close! He gets lost, he’s so happy! Castro (player) wants to kick his Corner but he can’t. He tells the pup “enough, enough, go over there”… however *commentator laughs*, there’s the pup! When he puts it on the floor, [the dog] goes again for the ball. And of course, as any skilled man, wants it all for himself. A bit of an over-eater, this pup. And he clearly has shown conditions / talent. [The team] found the way to the goal thanks to the Pichicho’s (little dog) essential input…. who, of course, as any protagonist had his place at [the tv show].“

*camera switches to interview where dog barks and mounches on the reporter’s mic (who allows him do it)*

I’ve been watching Argentinean football all my life and I can confirm this is the best to ever happen on a match.

[autistichalfblood]

#Meta