ZenKat

Old Account of @ToasterHusband; Hardly Use Anymore

[margonite-seer]

I don't know how else to be with someone. No matter how much I'd like to.

I used the photomode mod to take a look at Astarion's love confession scene. Normally, the camera is focused on Tav when choosing what to say.

These are the expressions Astarion is making off-screen while you are hovering over dialogue options.

[margonite-seer]

I surely can't be the only one in this

[mistercrowbar]

Astarion: “No one ever cared about me >:\”

Karlach, standing 10ft away: “ME I CARE I CARE SO MUCH”

[solmesia]

[chaoticunicornsworld]

about Neil Newbon fandom

My native language is not English so if you find grammar error please forgive me.

So here is the thing about Neil Newbon. He is a real person in a real world with a real life. And he works as an actor/artist. For money. Also, I can imagine he is working for fun, but first, for money. His work contains impersonations of fictional character's voices and movements. And also it contains keeping touch with fans. When he streams he is not your friend or boyfriend and he is not an object, he is working. You don’t know shit about him, you just collect the crumbs of his public persona. And as somebody who works in customer service i can tell, it can be different from the real person. I can be flirtatious if it serves the cause, even if I don’t exactly like the people in front of me. I can smile, I can be kind and helpful, I can listen, I can make them seen. And the next moment I can do the same with the next customer. And It's not a lie it’s not manipulating, I just use my customer service persona. And sometimes the stories what i hear can touch me. It is a tiring mental work, it can be overwhelming sometimes as well. So when you buy his prints or cameos, you don’t buy him, or his friendship. You just buy a piece of art, and you can think you buy to be seen for a moment. But if you have to buy to be seen by someone, better find a counselor or a therapist as he always suggests in those videos. If you play BG3, and romance Astarion, there is a scene where he tells you his favorite lines, and at some point he tells you „I love you”. And if you choose „it is to soon” he tells you it can be true if only for this night. That’s what you get from Neil, his attention for that moment. If you watch his streams you can notice people pay to write messages that can be mentioned by him. That’s working for money. Even, if he enjoy it. And I’m not against supporting his work, but please don’t use him as a therapist, or sex object. 

Also about the thirst. I’m a fully functioning woman, so I’m not denying that he is attractive and sexy, and the edits on tiktok about him can be really dirty. I feel ashamed when I see them even if they can affect me. Again, those pictures and videos are not him, those are his roles. Even if they are from interviews, or from public events. Those are the characters played by Neil. (And yes, there can be a character for Neil Newbon as a public person.) Not him. Please try to contain yourself, don’t embarrass yourself and don't objectify him, or anyone else. It’s humiliating. You can bring back the energy to your real life with your real partner, it could make your relationship better. Be aware, what you see isn't Neil, it is his art. How would you feel if somebody used a piece of art from you to look at you as a sex object? How would your partner feel about it? What do you think, how his wife feels about it? Or how will his daughter feel when she sees them?

And last. If you claim you “Love him” and then feel happy about that made up scenario as he is single, you don’t know about love at all. First of all, how could you love somebody you don’t know? What do you love about him? I can tell you, you love your imaginations about him. And it’s a form of avoiding real relationships when you love fictional and/or unavailable persons. You don’t have to face real emotions, if you chose that path. But it is not real. It’s a maladaptive coping mechanism. But If we accept theoretically that you “Love him”, and you tell you are happy because his marriage ended and he is single, that also isn’t love. It’s more like possessing. (And I can’t even tell if it’s true or just made up by some twisted mind.) Do you really think love means being happy for someone being unhappy? Do you really think if he is single then a person like you, with your mindset can be a real pair for him? Keep your dignity please, and let the real person keep his boundaries.

[consistencynevermether]

Astarion x Rouge! Tav

A/N: I am, as the professionals would say, back on my bullshit. anyways here's another in my series of Astarion x a certain class 

part 1 (Paladin Tav version)- https://www.tumblr.com/consistencynevermether/730256251991310336/astarion-x-gn-paladin-reader-hcs-an-this-man?source=share

Bastard x bastard 

You two are absolute little SHITS together let me tell y’all that 

Your love language? CRIME. 

No but seriously imagine this- one of you had this plain steel ring, nothing special or anything just collecting dust at the bottom of your bags. Honestly, you don’t even remember which one of you it originally belonged to

When you first met, one of you had stolen the ring from the other to prove they were “superior with their hands” to the other. Eventually, it became a game between the two of you, every few days stealing this little trinket from each other. And bragging until the other stole it back. It didn’t matter whether either of you wore it on your fingers, around your necks, or even hiding it in folds of clothing. Neither could hold onto it for more than a week before the other snatched it up 

The most memorable little moment with this ring- once you had both gone on a late night walk, hand in hand. The moon's soft glow bathing you both in silver, it was like a scene out of a romance novel, especially when you leaned in to press your lips against his

And then- 

While he was distracted you slipped it off his finger and booked it. Immediately running as fast as you could, not daring to look back, laughing as you sped off with your prize

Unfortunately for you, Astarion happens to be a vampire spawn. Vampire spawn are quite physically inclined, and Astarion is pretty fit

What I’m saying is you made it a good 30 feet before getting tackled to the ground and had the ring wrestled out of your hand 

Honestly, though, you were laughing so hard you didn’t even mind losing the game, you were just happy that for a second your master plan had worked. 

Astarion complained about how his outfit got all dusty because of you, but you had heard him laughing right along with you when he had tackled you to the ground

Astarion won’t admit this, but that ring means more to him than any bejeweled precious jewelry ever could, because it connects him to you

Both of you claim to have the best set of knives and take every opportunity to show off to each other with your skills. Once you actually picked a lock with a smaller blade and you could swear it caused Astarion to be a little flustered. 

Sharing clothes? Sharing clothes. Listen, I'm just saying, will you let your vampire boyfriend burn up in the sun or will you lend him that nice new cloak you just got? Yea, that’s what I thought now it’s joint property. Dw tho it all evens out when you steal one of his nightshirts (it’s the comfiest thing ever, and not just because it always faintly smells like him) 

You guys definitely do couples' heists together. Sneaking, pickpocketing, lockpicking, running from the law, it's all in a day's work for the most shifty couple in Faerun. One of you might distract a lord while the other snuck into his vault to retrieve some valuable magical item. 

Ok but in all seriousness, y’all must be the most ethereal couple around. Imagine seeing two people glide over the rooftops of Baldur's gate, each jump almost like steps to a dance they both know by heart. Flitting around each other like ribbons in the breeze, one with soft silver hair and the other face obscured by their pitch-black cloak, hood pulled up and rippling in the night air. They dance across rooftops, swift as shadows, graceful as spirits, never touching, and yet somehow the rare onlooker knows they are meant to be a pair.

Some bard has definitely written a song about that last bullet point I promise you. 

You two probably had a million cons just waiting to be used. I imagine during your time together trying to get rid of the tadpole, you would both talk late into the night, bouncing ideas off each other, throwing out ideas of different tricks you could pull on the unsuspecting. Some genuinely clever, most just absurd attempts at making the other person laugh.  

If you ever actually got the chance to you it though? Oh ho HO. let me tell you how this went down. Your party had gotten into a situation, attempting to be as inconspicuous as possible. But by a bout of bad luck, someone had started harassing Karlach and at the same time, Lazel had started yelling at a guard, hand on her sword, inches away from striking. The party needed some sort of distraction, and luckily you both had just the thing. 

Astarion had grabbed the nearest glass of wine and splashed it on you, then putting on his best offended face he anguished, “How could you cheat on me?!?! And with my own BROTHER!?!?” That sentence made everyone's head snap up, including the guards as you both laid the theatrics on thick. You kept this act up with Astarion for a good 10 minutes, with fake tears and dramatics from both of you. At one point on the spot, you made up that he had slept with your mother and it was revenge, and the crowd was extremely invested, people taking sides, guards trying to calm down the chaos. But hey you're fake out worked, Karlach and Lazel were able to sneak away quietly and you had both given the distraction of a lifetime. Shadowheart disapproves.

Occasionally the two of you will talk in Thieves cant to each other when you don’t want the party to overhear certain conversations. Originally you were both probably talking about important things like strategies and debating about how to go about getting rid of the tadpole. But now you kind of both just use it to piss off Lazel a little. 

Ultimately you two really understand each other on a deep level, you really are 2 people with one mind. And together there's a world of adventure out there for you both, and infinite fun magical items for you both too “acquire”.

[faerun-gully]

Baldur's Gate Headcanons: Astarion (REWRITE)

Rewritten to be truer to the character now that I've actually watched his romance route. Fish did her research now <3 No smut but some spice.

⎯

. Free will... free will... He's so not used to it.

. It's the constant feeling of "holy shit, I can do this? I won't be flayed?" Honestly he's probably said something like that, or along those lines and had you, Gale, Wyll and Karlach collectively staring in horror.

. After the death of Cazador, lowkey would make jokes about his time under his service to cope. The shocked faces and pity points he gets from his companions are hilarious to him.

. Chances are you probably taught him how to make jokes about his trauma

. What, he totally would look at this sassy mf

. Has definitely fantasized about being in Cazador's place, not necessarily ascended, but as a woebegone victorian nobleman who bemoans dramatically all day surrounded by art

. Y'all know that fever dream called Raggedy Ann and Andy a Musical Adventure? Yeah. He's this lesbian icon:

. It can be imagined that this man is drowning in potential suitors, (and by the looks of it he is LOL) but...

. Look, he knows he's attractive, he knows he's experienced when it comes to the pleasures of the flesh, but he said so himself: It doesn't feel... right. He doesn't like sex all that much.

. It's very clear to me that Astarion is a SA victim. He was forced to lay with so many people just to lure them to Cazador... And possibly Cazador himself.

. Initially laying with him, as mind numbing and mind blowing as it may be, he's not really all there. This is just a job to him, he would think...

. As I saw a YouTube comment once: You fell first, but Astarion fell harder.

. People... make love? People... lay with people because they love them, and not because they think they're beautiful or want something out of it? Astarion initially finds it hard to believe.

. You change that for him.

. Once this is established, the sex god vampire? Gone. Poof. This man is a blushing, awkward mess. All he knows is how to get his way with this act, as much as he hated it. To do so because he loved, truly loved... someone... Did he even deserve this?

. Slowly opens up to enjoying cuddling. Initially the type of guy to dress up in front of you, give you a wink and be on his way, but now... He can't bring himself to leave his side when you two get intimate.

. He's a fidgety cuddler. He doesn't know what to do with his arms. Wait, you're supposed to just lay here? Why? We did what we had to... oh, right, it's because we're in love, fuck. Right.

. Run your fingers through his hair. It's soft and this man will have a religious experience.

. Has learned to openly cry with you, to let everything out when none of your traveling companions are looking.

. He did so many horrible things in Cazador's name, he doesn't deserve forgiveness, yet here you are, playing with his hair as he lays in your lap, eyes red and cheeks stained from sobbing, completely exhausted, and you smiling gently down at his quivering form.

. He's never felt so weak... But so protected... He liked this.... very much.

. In another life, he would have asked you to marry him then and there.

. Imagine that, he would muse with a smile. Living in Cazador's palace, with you... his little spouse... No... perhaps a cottage in the woods... with a picket fence, a bubbling cauldron... an animal or two... or perhaps a little one running around the house...

. Of course nobody knows of this sentimental side of him, No one can. And if you do casually mention offhand that this man is a softie you one dead mf.

. He's still a drama queen through and through and will pull on your leg. It's his love language. It's the law.

. I see him not even drinking his wine sometimes, just carrying it around to be dramatic

. And Karlach being like the whole time "...can you not."

. I saw this hc on another post and wholeheartedly agree: Asatarion finds the humanoid form to be very aesthetically pleasing, but in a more artistic fashion rather than sexual.

. He would be the type of rich dude to have nude sculptures or renaissance/edwardian era paintings with nude models celebrating the humanoid body.

. He's definitely observed his companions (mostly you) bare because of this fascination. Honestly if you really think about it, the human body is a very aesthetically pleasing work of art.

. He likes to have you be his "mirror" since he can't look at himself. If you're an artist he'd definitely ask you to draw him for him to look at, so he would know what he looks like. Grow even more close and intimate, he may ask you to draw the sigil Cazador left on his back.

. Going forward, he's very, very very unsure about where the two of you and the rest of his companions are going, but he's liking it so far. And he's willing to keep going.

. ...As long as if you'll have him the way he is.

. Knowing you, confusing, wonderful you, you will 🩷

-❤️🐠

[ace-tarion]

I'm projecting ignore me-

Astarion x a Tav or OC who's also an abuse survivor, but they went in two opposite directions with how their abuse affected them.

Astarion became hard and cold, keeping everyone and everything at a distance, hiding his pain behind a carefully constructed layer of snark and sarcasm and wit and vitriol. He has had to suffer, so why shouldn't others?

Meanwhile Tav made it through their abuse, suffered, but survived, looked at all of the horrors and atrocities they had to go through, and said through a mouth full of blood and grit, "No one is ever going to have to suffer through this the same way that I did. No one is ever going to have to feel this way ever again. Not on my watch!" and they actively chose to be kinder. They saw the worst that the world had to offer and refused to let it turn them into a monster too. "It ends with me!"

(*insert the Doctor's speech from The Zygon Inversion because that scene lives rent free in my head and is always like a punch in the gut reminder to remain kind in a cruel and unjust world*)

Astarion x a Tav who has made it through their abuse and has come out unabashedly kind and patient and sympathetic, who refuses to give up hope - not on the world, not on others - who loves openly and bravely because they have had to go without it for so long. They still have their scars - some mental or emotional, maybe some are even physical - and are still recovering and healing, but they're far enough down their own journey of recovery that they can help lend a hand and guide Astarion onto his too, and then they can walk the path of recovering from a lifetime of abuse side by side, actively encouraging and supporting the other while battling their own internal demons and holding each other accountable should they begin to slip back into old, darker habits.

[rosegoldangelwings]

Sorry for the ass quality. But this is our concept for Jock Paperjam. We’re going for an “overworked student” vibe. He’s still a jock, don’t worry! But instead of basketball, he plays tennis. We thought that would be a fun idea to explore. We also thought that he could be overworked by his father (Error) who puts too much pressure on him.

On the outside, he seems like the popular jock who slays on court! But when he comes off the court and is around his friends… he’s a goofy awkward mess, albeit a little grumpy because he’s soooo tired. If any of you recognize “goofy awkward mess”, you get veteran brony points.

[supermodelcats]

MEOW_IRL

[tunashei]

Your wish is my command

[captainclickycat]

Oo I’ve got an old one

[icarus-suraki]

[rejisol]

that one fucking concept art of the dragon age races that depicts dwarves like this:

you suck and i defy you

[rabdoidal]

this makes me violent <3

[pri-the-writer]

Calling all dragon age artists! Let’s see your interpretation of what dwarven women should look like!

[luccorvus]

Okay, here u go

[sapphim]

this feels like a good time to give a shoutout to Sophie Campbell’s dwarves [1] [2] [3]

[lullychi]

it brings me so much joy when female dwarves look like dwarves

[wordbending]

these are AWESOME, but don’t forget ryoku kui, the creator of delicious in dungeon/dungeon meshi’s dwarves:

and her orcs:

and in general her ability to keep fantasy races recognizable but visually distinct:

while also maintaining extremely varied character designs for every character, major, minor, or background:

read dungeon meshi

[jumpingjacktrash]

that character art… how is it all so… adorable…

[luntian-berdengguhit]

Sorry for the quality. (´Д｀;;) Here I go again with human versions. =u=;;

Nick and Dima Toaster, and now I also have Hancook. ouo  I have so so many versions of Dima but I think I’ll stick with this one now! >A<

[alakazamryn]

I forgot I drew this too and my brothers didn’t find it nearly as funny as I did :^/

[zenkat11]

He looks so distressed.

[o-the-scientist]

DiMA Aesthetic for a friend on discord

[roterstern]

Earlier I saw the cutest art of  DiMA and friendly bugs from his memory program.So I’ve got another parallel with DiMA, who is ready to act tough and decisive if it is needed to protect his people, his home and everything he believes in.

[auntiemurdoc]

I uhhhh uhhhhhh

[bichippy]

Me rn