Jess, 28. I never seem to stray too far from this blog. OT5 with heavy zayn and liam! asks and messages are always answered! check me out on ao3 @ ziamhaze
What do you think of the disappearance we've been having in terms of fanfic writers these days, there really seems to be no new stuff to read and on Wattpad, at most there are 2 accounts that actively post or update. Do you think fanfics are going to die out or will we soon have new writers again with a desire to support this fandom with a drought of new reads?
Ironic of me to be answering a question like this after having received it so long ago…
Honestly, I think it’s all a numbers game. Meaning, as the fandom gets smaller, the odds of having people who are inclined to write fanfic also shrinks. Many might argue that the fandom hasn’t shrunk at all, that it’s actually the same as it once was, just less concentrated on Tumblr. And, looking at how big of venues each of the boys are playing as solo acts, I can easily see the justification for this line of thought.
However, these types of fans vary greatly. Most are there purely for the music and less for the deep-rooted lore and/or close-knit interactions within the fandom. Their involvement within ‘fandom’ as a whole, probably doesn’t stretch any further than a tweet or video share. I think it’s also pretty fair to assume that the type of fandom that this is - one based around music - doesn’t illicit the same type of fanwork that say an anime or novel might.
There’s also the amount/type of content that exists to keep fueling the fandom. There’s nowhere near as many interviews or photoshoots or candids as there once was to inspire fics. It takes a lot more self-discipline and yearning for creative exploration to start something on your own.
Mix all of this together and I think the current 1D fanfic landscape is sadly here to stay.
hi! i just read your Compartment 451 fic on ao3 & i just wanted to say some words :)
this is a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful story. my feelings towards harry potter are — well, mixed at best, but there will always be a little piece of me that adores it. this was so nostalgic for me, personally, as someone who knew (and still knows) so much trivia about it, so all the little nods to hp canon were downright delightful and having dean feature prominently makes me smile even more.
the boys' friendship is so delightful — being in different houses but still prioritising meals with one another, having their own little room, zayn inventing the cards to help them communicate. louis's what are they going to do, kick me out? attitude made me laugh, and little elijah just straight up stole my heart. also, the matching 451 tattoos for the compartment!! i love it.
but ziam. oh wonderful ziam. the fic being told from zayn's perspective works so well, and zayn coming in as a muggleborn and being so unapologetically comfortable with being muggleborn in a world of magic!! i love it, i love it so much. liam's speech at his presentation mirrored zayn's conversation with elijah about being a muggle vs being a wizard and the things that comprise him.
the backstory told through zayn's dreams is such a nice touch, it was a natural break in the current timeflow and gave us context for zayn's actions in the each section when needed.
this was just a really, really, really well written AU, and it sucked me in and captivated me, i blitzed through the entire fic in one go. i love it, i love it, i love it. one of my favourite fics i've ever read, ever. thank you so much for writing it.
First and foremost, my sincerest apologies for taking well over a year to answer this! I’m currently working on several pieces of work and sadly, no longer check Tumblr as much as I used to.
This message has lifted my spirits in the most sincere of ways. Admittedly, I knew very little about HP before writing this AU; I’d only ever read the 4th book and saw all of the films. So, to hear that I did a relatively good job with my research during the planning stages of this fic is unbelievably fulfilling.
Looking back on this story in particular elicits an immense amount of nostalgia in me. For my writing style, for my eagerness, for the early days of not knowing that I’d one day be dedicating my life to world building. And yet, when I try and go back to read this specific fic, I often times cringe at how horrible the grammar or sentence structure is. That said, to know that others are still finding joy beneath all of that, years after its original publishing date is the most unexpected thing ever.
As much as you’d like to thank me for writing this, I’d like to doubly thank you for taking the time out of your day to reach out and let me know how it’s touched you.
i just read you fics on ao3 and all of them are so good. thank you for your hardwood in writing and providing very brilliant stories. if i were to choose my favorite is the heart of him. thank you again. hope you're having a good day always 🤍
Hello!
This is such a wonderfully unexpected message! Thank you a million times over for taking the time to read not just one of my stories, but all of them! It never ceases to amaze me the dedication my readers possess.
Similarly, it's impossible for me to get bored hearing which fics end up standing out to readers. I definitely have my own favourites, but the relationship I have with them are completely different to those that my readers end up creating individually.
Having said that, I'm so so so glad that one of the stories I used to worry would put readers to sleep, has touched you in some small way. More importantly, thank you for letting me know!
Hope you're having a great day as well, and again, a million thanks for giving any of my fics a chance (:
Hey Do you have the killing type pre saved anywhere ? Cz it seems like the fic is deleted nd i soo badly want to read itt😭!
Hi!
Funny I keep getting messages about this, haha.
Often times authors who plan on publishing their fics will take them offline in order to protect sales, rights, etc. - that's what's happened here. The Killing Type is now published! Visit the author's page to order a physical copy or download the ebook!
I’ve just finished all your works on AO3 and like an addict, I’m craving more lol. Your writing style/technique is unlike any I’ve seen, at least in this “fanfic” world. I know you’re extremely busy with couple of big undertakings, but please don’t forget about us. You’ve got a new diehard fan in me and can’t wait to read more from you, even if it’s something from your reject draft folders lol. In all seriousness, you’re extremely talented and I’m sure you’ll be a success once the masses get to read your published works. All the best🙏
Even after all this time, I’m still so humbled when I receive messages like these. Thank you so so very much!
I’ve met a lot of people in my personal life recently who want to read my past works, which reminds me how badly I want to return to them all and tweak their sentence structure like mad. And then I hear from readers like you who have fallen head over heels for my old style of writing and I can’t help but feel immense gratitude. So much of the confidence I have in my writing/ideas came/come from my fic readers. You all gave me the momentum to experiment with my style and characters to the point that I'm now entering a PhD program with a debut novel manuscript and an international speaking engagement all before my first term even starts.
I’ll never be able to say thank you enough.
As for future fics, I just answered a separate ask about my thoughts on that and I think if you dig around past asks, you’ll be able to find a post which outlines the specific ideas I talk about. Fingers crossed time is in my favour!
Just got thru all of your body of work and I’m now hooked. You’re an amazing storyteller and truly gifted. Your world building and even instances where there might not be much dialogue still prove riveting . Like an addict, I’m anxious to see if there’s anything in the pipeline. I know you have a life outside of these, but we're greedy lol. All the best on your PhD program, all your hard work will be rewarded.
Thank you so much! For both sending me this message and spending your spare time reading my work. That’s amazing dedication and my utmost gratitude is being sent your way!
As I’m sure you can tell by how long it’s taken me to respond, life is pretty hectic. I’ve been very fortunate to have many creative opportunities be thrown my way over the past year, but unfortunately none are associated with fanfic.
Despite this, I still have so many ideas for chapter add-ons that go with my already-existing fics. I keep hoping that time will present itself for me to be able to follow through with these, but once it does, something pops up. Which, in this industry, is the greatest blessing to ever exist, but still… Know that I haven’t forgotten about these though!
Thanks again for such kind words and for finding something in the worlds I create worth clinging to (:
Jess, I need thank you for your faves! Found a few recommendations I will go through - so happy because I didn't have any left. Have a great day! Also, always looking forward for your writing, no pressure though! :) (I'll go read now, bye!)
Glad to be of help and I hope your day’s great as well!
If anyone’s looking for ziam reclists, feel free to check them out at this link (:
As for my writing...
I’ve literally just finished massive applications for a PhD program which I’ll be starting in the fall, so I haven’t had time to churn out anything original in ages. A moment of silence for my 2 year creative streak.
Thank you.
I’ve been accepted on a practice-based PhD program which means in order to prove my idea, I’m going to be producing a piece of work, not necessarily a long 100k word thesis like you normally would for a regular PhD. That said, my project will be an LGBTQ+ alternate history romance novel. I’m super stoked about it tbh. The concept actually came to me about 2 years ago as an 80k ziam fic, so to any aspiring authors currently writing fic - YOUR IDEAS ARE NOT CONFINED TO AO3. Now, don’t get me wrong. This isn’t easy. You have to practice practice practice like fuck. You have to open your eyes to different styles of writing. What works and what doesn’t.
A friend once told me: writing is reading. And she IS NOT. WRONG. I constantly cycle what I’m reading and listening to. Yes, I highly recommend audiobooks for nonfiction reads. It feels like you’re just listening to a long ass podcast. Put it on while you’re cleaning, while you’re walking the dog, while you’re shopping, while you’re on public transport. Broaden your subject horizons this way! Pro Tip: use your library to check them out instead of paying for audible! I have library accounts in both the US and the UK and each give you the ability to loan audiobooks via ‘Libby’, so go ahead and check your local library bc it’s an international thing. As for physical books, my rotary looks like this: travel literature (90% of the time centred around the Middle East/South East Asia), classic, LGBTQ+ fiction, travel literature, classic, regular fiction. Repeat. The things I’ve learnt about description through travel lit, you’d never believe. And when I throw in the rogue manga??? Dialogue ideas for days!!! Everyone’s rotation is going to look different. Point is, it’s putting one together that will show you various ways to write. My larger point, however, is this - ideas that start out as fic don’t need to be written as fic; some have the ability to hold up in the big bad literary world as something else. Take the time to practice development and it’s crazy where you can go.
Sorry, that was a rant I couldn’t shake off. I’m going to go back to editing the book that I finished last year and hopefully get in on shelves soon. If any small ficlet ideas come to me in the meantime, trust me, I can’t shake those off either.
hi!!! i just want to pop in to say that i’m literally so thankful for you. Z.A.Y.N. actually inspired me to begin writing music, and i now have a meeting scheduled with a local record company to release a single!!! you have no idea how glad i am you wrote that and that you exist <3<3<3 thank you so, so much jess, truly!
Hello!
I'm literally speechless. I always go on about how disbelieving I am anytime I read a message or comment from a reader, explaining how my stories have touched them, but this is something else.
Organizing/Planning Z.A.Y.N. was singlehandedly the hardest out of all my fics. I just knew that I wanted to tweak Zayn's career ever so slightly to make it different, yet believable, and that I wanted to mess around with some sort of creative 'form' element a.k.a. what ended up being the lyrical insertions that, ultimately, served as the underlying thread that kept the fic together. (And what got it to all make sense, quite frankly.) It was a huge challenge for me as the writer, but I was pretty proud of the outcome (awkward sentence structures aside). Even so, I never would've thought that this many people would actually take to the story.
As far as fic is concerned, it was a massive risk for me to publish something like Z.A.Y.N. and expect anyone to read it. There aren't any explicit scenes. It's based on theoretical dialogue (yes, I'm going to call it that). And let's all be honest, IT'S SLOW. And not even in the yes-I'm-so-happy-they're-finally-admitting-their-feelings-to-one-another-after-90,000-words! sort of way that readers obsess over. It's just flat out, two characters developing - individually and romantically - in a very 2D setting/manner. Most fic readers want sex. Most want nail-biting pining. Most want a momentum that equals satisfaction! But I wasn't about to force Z.A.Y.N. to be something that it wasn't, nor make the characters act in a way that wasn't authentic to them. And somehow, the anomaly that it ended up taking shape as, people have fucking adored.
So you thank me, but I thank you! For appreciating the quirky writing style and the drawn out conversations and the subtle points that really hit when you let them. For letting me put out a story like this and not allowing it to fall to the wayside because it didn't fit the conventional 'fic norms'.
As for your own personal accomplishments, let's all just take a step back and give you a round of applause. My writing Z.A.Y.N. aside, it takes GUTS to go out and try for a job that seems damn near unattainable...at the best of times. Massive congratulations to you for not just attempting to give that a go, but for smashing it along the way! I will truly carry on remembering this impact for as long as I continue writing. I'm so very honoured to be a part of your artistic journey.
Because I never really advertise it, my followers should know that I have an email dedicated to my fic writing. Right now I use it for business things, analytics, all the good stuff, but people are more than welcome to get in touch with me in that way if you'd like or feel more comfortable: [email protected]
Again, congratulations on your accomplishments thus far and keep writing! I'd love it if you kept me (and us) updated on your success.
Hello love, would you be open to translations of your works?
Hi!
This is such an unexpected and honoured ask! I'm most definitely open to translations, and even more so by people who ask first! I've actually had someone already try and translate The Prince King into Spanish on Wattpad, but not only did it go unfinished (they tried to do it "chapter" by "chapter"), it was also without my consent.
If you'd like to come off anon, I'd love to discuss details! No need to worry about identity issues either, I won't publish the ask unless you'd like me to (:
Just thought about “kick, Push“ and wanted to thank you for writing this piece. I come back very often. Also I wanted to ask what your writing process looks like (if you like to share)
Hope you have a great day!
Hello! So sorry for taking as long as I have to reply to this, life has been crazy busy.
First of all, thank you so much for reading my work and then...reading it again. It’s mind boggling for me to think that there are people out there who have such a fondness for a world I’ve created that they find themselves wanting to relive it. Really, it’s a very surreal thing.
As for my writing process, I actually wrote a HUGE post about this on my Patreon about a year or so ago. To save myself the time, I’m literally going to copy and paste it below the cut. That said, it’s the mindset I was in back then, so do keep in mind that some points may have changed since, as this past year has been a whirlwind for my writing. In general though, it paints a pretty clear picture of how I approach a story and the steps I take to see it out.
Also, it should be noted that by no means is there a right and wrong way when approaching any sort of art. I’ve learned by virtue of being in a professional writing atmosphere for over a year now that how I work is VERY atypical, VERY regimented, and VERY analytical. Art is not this. It can be, but it usually isn’t.
Enjoy the process. Enjoy the mistakes. And most importantly, enjoy the story. It’s shown itself to you and for you, above all else.
WARNING: The information below contains spoilers for nearly all of my fics. Proceed with caution.
In a few of my writing updates for the last fic I mentioned how I tend to write in a non-linear fashion. I’ve got zero background in creative writing, however, I did dabble in screenwriting during my high school and undergrad years. That being said, it’s a lot easier for me to write in a visual way with blocking versus simply planning a plot arc and writing it as I go (and also why I have so much dialogue in my stories; they’re really just elaborate film scenes linked to form a story without the b-roll).
What does that mean?
If you’ve read Customer of the Week you’ll have read Zayn using a similar methodology. And truthfully, many many comic/graphic novel authors use screenwriting software and blocking breakdowns for the subsequent drawings. But I will admit, I was a bit selfish with using my exact method for Zayn’s in that last fic.
I usually start a fic with 1 of 2 ideas:
A career I want one of them to have
A typical AU setting [ex: uni/frat, coffee shop, supernatural, kidfic, famous (athlete, model, singer)]
Genuinely, that’s what it all boils down to. From there, I spend some time thinking about what it is they could do in those worlds and form a very simple objective/path that they will allow them to fall in love. If I had to guess, I’d say The Heart of Him was the most difficult to plan because it was VERY subtle, not a lot of action or huge relationship build up; the easiest by far was Kick, Push.
Next, I do a lot of research on certain plot points. For example, with Kick, Push I needed to see what the Olympic schedule was in order to know how many scenes I needed to fill to make it one per day. Or with Z.A.Y.N. I had to make the longest playlist ever to just get the music down because I obviously wanted to have Zayn as a songwriter, but then I took AGES figuring out ok, so I have these 80 songs I love for lyrical analysis, how do I incorporate them? I remember shifting around the songs on paper just to visually see it all and thought I was crazy, but then I realized if I bunched them together by subject matter, that would allow me to make the scenes’ dialogue based on those topics. Even with Compartment 451 I needed to do tons of Harry Potter related research to see, could Liam even be a Head Boy and Quidditch Captain? How does that work? If it wasn’t canon, do I want to divert? If I want to stick with canon and he can only be one then how do I switch the plot because it was very obviously based on how busy Liam was with both labels.
Ok, so once I’ve got the research down (though I still find myself doing more during the writing process if I don’t know what something looks like and I need to make it historically accurate or if they have a food item and I need to make it match the setting), I take time to break down the story into scenes, which is where Zayn’s explanation finally comes into play. For several days (sometimes up to a week or so), literally all I do is map out the entire book. Essentially, this is the whole of the creative process. I think about settings and pacing and where things need to happen at certain times and all that good stuff. It ends up very fragmented, but the best part is finishing because then I have 15-25 scenes and a fully finished story.
Numbering aside, this is what Scene 14 looks like for Customer of the Month:
Zayn’s Flat - One week later
FOR THE NEXT WEEK - liam focuses on reading rather than experiencing bc he’s loved the worlds they’ve entered, but he feels like they’re such a small piece of the larger pie and that’s a little unfair to zayn for having created the whole thing
Takes a long time to get through each bc he’s busy looking at the detailed art and appreciating that just as much as the storylines
Thinks about how much easier it’d be if he lived a life this structured and immediately rewarding - saving people or fighting for them
Zayn notices him lost in thought and comes over to see what’s on his mind
I envy his life and practice; you could do it; no I don’t think I could; let’s see then
NINJA - Gets a training lesson - gruelling and long, knows Zayn will pull him out with the time constraints
Pair up with training partner - Zayn; flirtatious fighting
Get called in for first test to spy and get info on military chief - kill whoever gets in your way; liam knows he’s trained enough that he won’t ever get caught, so he won’t need to make that decision
Make it through mansion and while zayn goes in to get info, liam keeps guard, outwits a single man, but then doesn’t hear young boy walking around - knows he should kill him but can’t even when boy starts yelling, zayn comes out and signals for him to get in and they have to race through the palace to get out safely
So maybe you’re more of a samurai with your compassion
Now, this was the absolute original outline. Things change and/or get deleted during the writing process, but this is where I start. So imagine the entire story blocked out this way. It’s very very very very difficult to do this (in my opinion) because you’re literally writing the entire story in a few days. But like I said, once it’s done, you’re all good. You can stand back and look at the whole thing and think, ok this needs to happen sooner or there was no foreshadowing for that, go back and add in scene 5, or, actually I need to add a scene in between these two because this happens too fast. I know a lot of people/creatives would say, “but that’s why you do what you do - to create. If this phase is the equivalent of molding a block of clay in a sculpture, then shouldn’t it be the bulk of your enjoyment?”. Probably, but the amount of creativity and intense focus needed all at once makes the process a lot less enjoyable than you’d think.
So the hard part is out of the way, now what?
The writing. Sort of.
Oddly, I find myself writing the first 10k or so words normally. And by that I mean, simply looking at that scene’s bullet note list and writing it fully/coherently. After that, I tend to peter off and ditch writing linearly for my second method where I “block out” a scene during the daytime and at night, go back and “fill it in”. Because my motivation/inspiration was so low for the last fic, I sort of went crazy and blocked out about 70% of the fic all at once, then went back for a weekish to fill it all in (spoiler alert: I hated it). But typically, and certainly going forward, I stick to the daylight/night time routine.
Here’s what a “blocked out” scene based around dialogue looks like as taken from the above ninja scene:
He’s even more determined than I am.
He sort of has to be if he wants to prove himself using only one arm. I made him a bit like a militant robot for a reason. -stares at Liam’s side profile- You could train that hard if you wanted to.
I don’t think I could.
With these muscles? -squeezes his arms lightly- At least try so I can watch.
-smiles bashfully- Can you afford to take the night off?
-liam doesn’t get an answer, just enough time to take a deep breath before he’s launched into another dimension-
And here’s what it looks like filled in:
“He’s even more determined than I am,” Liam mumbles, defeated over what it means to not be able to hold a light to a fictional character.
“He sort of has to be if he wants to prove himself using only one arm. I made him a bit like a militant robot for a reason.” Amid Zayn’s pause, Liam can feel his profile being studied, but he refuses to see why. “You could train that hard if you wanted to,” Zayn opines boldly.
“I don’t think I could.”
“With these muscles?” Liam’s upper arm gets a light squeeze. “At least try so I can watch.”
The racy comment finally gets Liam to raise his line of sight, his typical bashful smile present. “Can you afford to take the night off?”
But Liam doesn’t get an answer, just enough time to take a deep breath before he’s launched into another dimension.
From there, it’s straight to editing draft one. Word count depending, my beta reader will be sent their copy a week or so after that. While she edits, I do all the administrative tasks associated with putting out a fic (drafting all the ao3 authors notes/tags/summary, making the picspam, making the BTS page, etc.). When she’s done, I’ll split my screen, go down the fic for a final read through (draft 3), and look for her edits as I do my own.
As my plots get to be deeper slice-of-life pieces, the longer the scene breakdowns will take for me to create. Without having ultra detailed bullet notes on talking points, the stories’ slow pacing and societal commentary will be near impossible to smoothly weave into a love story. Can’t wait to see how much hair I lose in the coming years!
Anyhow, I hope this was an interesting look into how my fics go from concept to final product. If you’re hungry for more, you can go back to the BTS page for “Compartment 451” to see the full fic in scene breakdown.
