No such luck for devious flies.

Slight ref. to baking choc

[fairycosmos]

did they ever figure out how to put thoughts into words. did they ever get on top of that

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Sam Handwich.

[sufficientlylargen]

If Pikiwedia says it it must be true.

[zooperdoopers]

I made Pikiwedia real. Works for any Wikipedia page. Use this wisely :)‌

[deadelated]

If you become friends with someone they might offer you shelter or sources of protein

[cosmicallytiredd]

explaining midwest emo to someone is like well yeah the music is bad. i uh. i know that! i like it.

[operaticskeleton]

you know the band is going to be fire when the singer can’t sing and the instrumentalists can’t decide on a rhythm

[public-transport-victoria]

sorryyyy no trains tomorrow we replaced them all with a big slug

[bacony-cakes]

very glad that i still have this image

[toskarin]

oh, did I ever tell you about [thing I've told you about no fewer than four times, opening on exactly this sentence every single one of those times]

[abyssaldyke]

It's spring now which means the kids in my city have started drawing hopscotches on the sidewalk and as a rule I do every hopscotch I see because 1. Use it or lose it (ability to scotch) and 2. If a child got down on the hardscrabble streets of Boston Massachusetts to draw a scotch the least I can do is use it, but in doing the hopscotches, I've learned that about 50% of them are the typical 8-10 step scotch and the other 50% are. Somewhat avant-garde. And of course I'm not vetting the entire scotch before I start it so sometimes it's like haha 8 steps woo! Childlike whimsy! And sometimes they're 20 steps or 30 or they've got a section with three squares instead of two where you have to do a little Charleston to step on all three, or, memorably, FORTY one foot squares. A full BLOCK of jumping on one foot but I'm no quitter so once I've started Jigsaw Junior's fuckin hopscotch gauntlet I'm there til the end just a daily pot smoker in her thirties jumping kasa-obake style through an affluent suburb while some little proto-kennedy watches from his bedroom window rubbing his sadistic little third grade hands together and cackling. It's amazing. I love spring.

[sidebyside-withafriend]

vampire who bites you and goes “hm yes I detect notes of Vitamin B12” like a sommelier

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

that snake we all used to nudge around on nokia phones escaped nokia factory last week andno one knows where it went lmao. im scared as hell to sleep

[c3rvida3]

True Statement: "When you have a hammer, everything looks like a nail."

Truer Statement: "When you mixed too much two-part epoxy that's rapidly setting and you have 300 blank pin backs burning a hole in your craft drawer, everything in your house looks like it might make a cool pin."

[ancientcharm]

Roman marble statue of a pair of dogs, 2nd century AD

British Museum

[tsundernova]

Domestic dispute in public

[crabussy]

hi everyone. do yourself a favour and go create a beautiful horse for me

[dogpuppy]

[hexjulia]

so hard not to become the most annoying person on earth if you're a little excitable and just learned a little about a topic literally no one around you has any interest in

[citizen-saint]

sudoku hits different when you’ve got several pressing tasks you’re ignoring