I will preface this by saying that I love PHM and Iron Lung, and I think BloodyMary is a super adorable ship. And maybe what I'm about to say is a hot take, and maybe I'm getting unnecessarily agitated over it. To negate the biggest parts of my agitation, I most definitely waited a couple of days until I calmed down just to see if my opinion would change. It has not, but it's coming to me with less aggression.
I do love the BloodyMary ship. I do.
What i do not love is people saying things like, "Do you think Mark knows we ship him with Ryan Gosling?" or "I wonder what Mark thinks about being shipped with Ryan Gosling?"
No, i'm sure he doesn't know. Because if he know's anything, he knows that SIMON is being shipped with RYLAND GRACE. SIMON. And GRACE. Not Mark and Ryan.
"Oh but it's a joke! It's not serious!", "We're not being serious, we know we mean the characters."
But some don't know. Some aren't online as often. What if that is the first statement they see? What if they have no context to PHM or IronLung? Not to mention how INSANELY parasocial that sort of speak could get, really fast. These are literally two ACTUAL people in two ACTUAL distinct and separate relationships.
And with the insanely explicit writing I've seen from this ship?? (There's no way they would be that hot on each other that fast, especially not after what they have been through. And yes, the internet is freaky, there's no escaping that, but DAMN guys.)
But when you are separating the character from the actor, that's fine. When you can acknowledge that Simon and Mark aren't the same exact person, and when you can acknowledge that Ryan and Ryland are not the same exact person, thats fine.
But the amount of people I've seen acting like it's Mark and Ryan being shipped together and not Simon and Grace is crazy to me.
(And do NOT get me started on the insane woobiefication of a white man and the animalistic aggression of a poc being created and amplified, because that's gross. <mild edit here, punctuation is odd and it read like i was saying poc men are aggressive, that is NOT what im saying i am referring to the amplification of incorrect characterization and behaviors of both characters> And insanely OOC for either of them. Simon's aggression is trauma based, not a 'oo im a sexy deviant'. Cause it's not hot when it's played that way. It's a gross mistranslation of what he's been through as a character. And vice versa. Ryland Grace isn't a pathetic wimpy soft-boi or he would have NEVER made it to the end of PHM. At all.)
IDK, maybe I'm being overdramatic. IDRC though, because at the end of the day, the parasocial-ness of saying it's Mark and Ryan over Simon and Grace really, genuinely, disgusts me.
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