Huston

/huestun/ You’re welcome to call me Hue They/she • birom ace • cis men dni

[27habits]

I knew I was doomed the moment I laid eyes on you. The type of doomed where you just say ‘damn’ and sit down to enjoy a beer. And that’s exactly what we were doing. Except our beer is cheap wine and the bottle is being passed between us. I’m staring at you absently as you take a swig. My heartbeat picks up slightly as the smooth liquid drips down your chin. It looks wrong against your perfect complexion, so I reach out and gently wipe it away. You smile warmly and I return it. The only difference is that my smile isn’t warm. Everything about me is frozen and distant. I wish I could be present like you. I wish I could feel like you. Now I’m alone. You faded away because I froze up. Damn.

Randomly wrote this. Am I back? Probably not

[27habits]

Maybe I’m a goddamn fool, but if it means things go back to how they used to be, then I’ll dress up in those stupid pointy shoes and do a dance for my queen

[27habits]

If the universe doesn’t want us together then I will take a torch and burn it down. We may go with it but at least we can live happily in the next one

[27habits]

Sometimes I hate love but more often I enjoy it. I have never felt so hopeful for a future that I’m unable to see

[27habits]

I did not know someone could own my soul like this. Please never allow her to lose it

[27habits]

I saw you in a dream last night

It was nice seeing your face or at least what my brain thought was your face. It was the most realistic one I’ve had with you but it was so short. After a lot of happiness my subconscious moved on to another dream. I think it forgot too much about you. I don’t think I even heard your voice simply cause I don’t remember it anymore. I was so excited tho cause it meant you came back but you didn’t. You’re still gone

[27habits]

I love the stars but tracing the freckles that cover your nose and forehead is better than stargazing

[27habits]

The coming of the realization was slow like the cold seeping in during autumn. Growing subtly but not slowly until you remember that winter was coming. I was in love and it had snuck up on me like the first chill of the season

[27habits]

Just waiting for the day I can finally say waiting for you was worth the months of pain

[27habits]

I trust your hands more than I trust my own. Mine have beaten me, cut me, let me fall. But yours. Yours do the same to you yet when they touch me I know they’ll never cause harm

[27habits]

I wonder if she thinks I’ll break up with her the next time we talk. I wonder if she’s worried I found someone new. I wonder if she thinks about how bad the heartbreak is going to be one day. But god I hope she doesn’t feel that way. Those feelings are terrible and I’d rather be the only one with them

[27habits]

I hope she knows that I’m not going to leave. Even if our souls are separated. I will call her mine until she wishes otherwise

[27habits]

I’ve seen very little of you but I can feel how close I am to silently understanding. You don’t need to prove your beauty for I feel it in your words

[27habits]

We need to stop telling people that their way of dealing with mental issues is selfish. It doesn’t help. It especially doesn’t help if you don’t try to get them out of that mental space. In many cases but not all

[27habits]

I don’t want to forget. I just don’t wanna hold an emotional tether to the idea of you anymore

Despite everything else I feel, I hope you’ve reached the freedom you desired in whatever realm you’re exploring

[27habits]

Made sure I waited until I calmed down to post this

The rush of love

If I agree

To your fantasy

Will I finally be free

I’m a ghost in this small world

And I don’t know what love means

Could you teach me

Nothing personal

Just enough so I have control

Of the rush

Of being loved

[27habits]

This was meant to be a writing exercise but I got into it a bit so here you go

I called your line

4 too many times

To hear the sound of light

The sound that used to be mine

Now it’s distant

I regret those times

Now you’re missing

But you’re still in my life

If you get this

And miss my shit

I will visit

Can we talk tonight?