bajanboi

Trying my Best

[9milly]

Man I did not epext to be single going into 2021. This has been a very hard time for me. I still very much love the young lady in question. I have been trying to let God handle things but my future seems so unclear right now. Not sure why I am typing this out but I think this will be my diary for now.

I have never felt this alone. Im a social person but idk its just a huge chunk of my life that is missing right now. The depression always sets in at Night. Been trying to occupy myself with studying the Bible and listening to messages and they do grant me some semblance of peace. Though only for a short time. I hope she is as well as possible too.

Today doesn’t feel as bad I wish two or so years would pass in an instant though. I feel il be better with time but if we are being honest the pain just gets old not really gone. It’s hard not to be guilty cause the fault is mine.

It’s hard talking to someone everyday for 4 years to not be talking to them period. The gym really helps though

Il just be documenting this journey till I either forget, move on or idk Tumblr Explodes

I think the hardest part about it all is the inability to talk to “that person” late at night. Just for conversation or company so one of you could fall asleep on the other.

She says it was God who brought the decision to end the relationship and I get that but Idk i hope its really him and not an excuse. This whole thing is hard because there is barely anything to fault her for I guess. If I could blame her for something I guess this would feel better its really hard to lose a great thing

The girl I love doesn’t love me anymore and she may never love me again and that hurts like hell.

I feel like imma die, this life is so hard and now I lost something making it a lil easier numbing the pain will only cause pain in the future. I hate it here I HATE it here. All you do is live struggle and DIE. This is not going well at all

All I ever do is hurt this girl. She is HURTING and I got the audacity to be wanting her to give me another chance. When she has be perfect to me. I out here expecting forgiveness.

I cannot wait to feel good about myself again. I cannot WAIT. Everyday im going with God though just leaning and trying to see what He sees in me.

It’s amazing how you hurt the people you know yoi dont want to. The people that don’t need anymore pain in their lives

Imma die alone nuh

Seriously, try to be deserving of the love you want. Work hard not to mess it up

[wesleygasm]

[jigglypuffsvevo]

[9milly]

Why I deleted snapchat

[blackgirlsreverything]

[blackgirlsreverything]

[jamaicanblackcastoroil]

Also if you wanna go a little further back My Wife and Kids replaced Jazz Raycole with Jennifer Freeman. In fact, for the promotion of the show after the new Clare was cast, they didn’t even bother shooting new pictures; they just put Jennifer’s head on Jazz’s body.

[audio-sexual]

I think about this constantly when I see a new Freeform tv show, it’s the paperbag test.

[mochachocolatteyaya]

And the biracial girls in the notes are just as insufferable as the white women that hop on black folks posts. Nobody was questioning your blackness we said we want to see DARK SKIN black women not thee same 6 mixed girls all the time!! 🙄 "sO iM nOt bLacK enOuGh!?!?!?" Y'all annoying AF

[okayysophia]

and when the opportunity arises its never the other way around; an established light skinned character or actress played by a dark skinned actress. its always “im not black enough” in a society that continually tells black girls of the dark variety that their black is way too much... unless they’re showing black women as aggressive and void of any other emotion but anger ie. hollywood, netflix, tyler perry, etc.

[black-is-beautiful18]

They better get like Zendaya and start taking roles meant for white people cuz I am tired of ppl that look like me not getting the chance to shine.

[dynastylnoire]

^^^^^

[a-philanthropistswife]

I’m really glad there’s discussions about this issue taking place

[dicapito2-deactivated20230424]

A huge step back from the 90s.

[izbirakin]

Sevdiğim kediler

[blacklacerabbit]

Dance Theatre of Harlem Company. Magnifique! 🩰

[ilovepugs]

[nowthisnews]

‘Race and racism is a reality that so many of us grow up learning to just deal with. But if we ever hope to move past it, it can’t just be on people of color to deal with it. It’s up to all of us – Black, white, everyone – no matter how well-meaning we think we might be, to do the honest, uncomfortable work of rooting it out. It starts with self-examination and listening to those whose lives are different from our own. It ends with justice, compassion, and empathy that manifests in our lives and on our streets.’ — Michelle Obama

[9milly]

I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT

[shuubass]

[daddy6x-deactivated20180305]

Reblog the money Rihanna to bring Benjamins your way 

[darkcocosb-blog]

Reblog. Reblog!!!!

[chachingchocolateting]

Shit been going good lately let’s make it even better

[chloeyhalle]

Chloe x Halle photographed by Julian Dakdouk

[iridescent-adolescent]

pro hoe ✨pro virgin✨pro choice✨pro sex on the 1st date✨pro waiting til marriage✨pro anything thats consensual & you’re comfortable with✨

[glowdetails]

Chloe x Halle for Teen Vogue June 2020 Issue.

[midnightmurdershow]

Planet Earth II (2016) Episode 05 “Grasslands” Directed by Chadden Hunter

[blackpeoplefashion]

this painting will always be live.

[10memes]

[buzzfeed]

Watch 100 Years Of Black Men’s Hair Trends In One Minute

Hair and politics are always intertwined.

[tsvrcm-deactivated20161229]

YES!

[melanin-king]

I never seen one with a black man

[perfectyouthqueen]

I love it

[elodieunderglass]

I am RECEIVING the time periods he is transmitting with his gestures and expressions. That’s amazing! How did he act “the 1970s” with his face, and how did I understand it, despite having never touched a single 1970. How is that slight eyebrow gesture absolutely the 2010s. He made the same Grandpa Face that all of the men of the 1940s could make in photos: amazing.