A Mere Ninja

I Am ... Jenna Marie Or 'A Mere Ninja' if you anagramise my name. I decided to keep a diary about working from home and social distancing. I thought it might be interesting to see the degradation of my mental state over time.

[a-mere-ninja-blog]

Week 2

Day 7:

Doesn’t feel like Monday! Feels like an extension of Sunday. But with things to do. 

Received video call from friend who is bored at home. Interrupted constantly by her 3 year old either trying to kill herself, beating her little sister over the head with a metal pole or trying to run off with me (the phone) to show me things around the house. Grateful I only have a grumpy cat.  

Ad mowed the lawns whilst I worked. Got actual fomo. Because it’s sunny. And he’s outside. With something to do. FOMO! ABOUT MOWING THE LAWN! He had to save washing the cars for me so we could enjoy it together. Never washed a car in my adult life. Now feels like a treat. 

BoJo announces lockdown, without actually saying the word. Only allowed out once a day to exercise. Feels like doing time for a crime I didn’t commit.

Day 8:

Have upgraded to gym wear this week. Mainly because this week’s pjs are shorts and it’s cold in my kitchen. Opt for my galaxy leggings and a hoody. 

Work flies by today in a blur of calls. Lots going on to support aviation and keep national infrastructure going.  

Do workout in garden & practice my skipping. Attempt to do one footed boxer skip. Still determined to come out of isolation fit. Turn to Youtube. Manage to get a basic skip going. Pretty chuffed. Film self. Not look remotely like Anthony Joshua. Miffed. Clearly a bad tutorial. 

Long call with oldest friend. Never fails to cheer me up. 

Redo the gel polish on one hand. Currently pink on the left and gold on the right. Save the other hand for tomorrow. Gotta have something to look forward to. 

Before bed Ad puts big red cross through today’s date on the calendar. Has decided he wants to keep a tally of the days in lockdown. Like a prisoner. Is really chuffed with his idea. Day one down. 

Day 9:

Work is another blur of calls. Had video call with director whilst hair in a pineapple. Never gonna complain about a bad hair day or feel self conscious at work again.

Ad busy with jobs in the garden. Very happy with his man tools until he cuts through the wire of his saw. That cut his fun short.  

Attempted a run with Ad. Well a jog. Didn’t go too far as Ad’s torn calf is still recovering. But probably did twice the distance with all the zigzagging across the road to avoid people.  

Think about painting nails on other hand. Can’t be arsed. Might leave them mismatching. Aint nobody gonna see anyway. 

Another big red cross. Day two down. 

Day 10:

Work. Still trying to publish FAQs from the last few days on our website. Two calls with policy debating the use of ‘shall’ versus ‘should’. Please this one is not a video call.

[a-mere-ninja-blog]

Week 1 of working from home

Monday:

Late evening get a text from our company alerting system saying we are all WFH for the foreseeable. And so it begins...

Day 1: 

Quite happy. Like the peace and quiet. Feeling positive - I'm going to storm through the last part of my professional studies!

The day flies by with back to back skype calls.

First call I am panicked by the need to use video. The lack of makeup or bra is making me feel uncomfortable. But I ease into it.

Cat embarrasses me on an important call - circling the table screaming for attention. Does not understand skype etiquette. Hoping I can keep myself on mute until the rage leaves her tiny body. I think it's safe to contribute. I take myself off mute. The cat decides to throw herself against the kitchen wall and launch up the stairs and across the landing at her heaviest possible decibel. Sounds like I've adopted a Rhino. Apologise to colleagues.

Last call of the day. Someone mentions how it's nice to see everyone dressed properly. Pleased I wore a thick cardigan over my pajamas.

  Day 2: 

Still quite happy. Decided I needed to wear a different garment over my pjs today so no one gets suspicious. Opted for a blue hoody.

Now pretty comfortable with my make-up-less face on skype. Think this might be good for my skin. And the light in my kitchen is good anyway. Flattering. I don't look like death.

The cat sleeps all day. Maybe she is embarrassed.

Enjoying the ability to eat hot, fresh food (whilst I still have supplies). I even decide to make dinner for my partner when he gets home from work (which never happens - he is the domestic one in the relationship). I make him carbonara. He is surprised.

  Day 3: 

Opt for a big blue fluffy jumper today.

The mornings seem to go by in blur with check ins and calls. But the afternoons are starting to drag.

Got an email from HR saying I need to WFH for 12 weeks due to my asthma. Seems like a scarily long time.

I try a skype lunch date with my two work besties who are in isolation. We have the video on as we eat our pot noodles and roast each other in the normal fashion. Much more enjoyable than first anticipated. Particularly when I discovered you can eject people from the call. Timed it right after an insult. Lots of childish behaviour ensued. 

By the end of the day my back is hurting. Turns out the hard kitchen chair I use to WFH once a week is not suitable for long term use. Who knew. Wishing I had stolen my beloved office chair.

Cat sleeps all day again but loses her tiny mind at night. Maybe we've now settled in to an agreeable routine?

I make dinner again. Ad is happy but says he feels lazy. Wonder why I didn’t feel lazy the last 79 days of the year I didn't make dinner? Vow to be less shit. 

  Day 4: 

Opt for a red superdry hoody today. Am quite enjoying picking out a new jumper every day. So much easier than deciding on a whole outfit.

I make scrambled eggs for breakfast and start my day by catching up on icomms & news. My back is definitely a bit sore today. I think about my office chair again.

Work out that it's only one week til payday. Thank god. I realise how much money I’m saving WFH, not buying constant snacks from the canteen. It's day 4 of no chocolate. Decided at the beginning of the week to treat this like a detox. Maybe this will be the year I get a summer body? 

Lunchtime: I cave and drive to Gatwick to get my chair. In my car the freedom is liberating. Tempted to get chocolate on the way home. Refrain. Summer body.

I anti bac the chair as soon as I get in the house even though it's mine. I sit in it. OMG! I cannot describe how much better that is! Do a few swivels for fun.

We watch the PMs press conference, which has become our new routine. He closes all pubs and nightclubs. No difference to my social life there. He also closes gyms. No more Thai boxing for me. This I am gutted about. Muay Thai has been my release and my fitness kick for the past 18 months. Really don’t want to lose what fitness I have!

We try a home workout. Our gym gave us free online workout videos. Pretty good. Cat is freaked out.

  First weekend:

Saturday - Day 5: 

Nice lazy morning with Ad before he went to work.

Did several loads of washing and attacked the overflowing ironing basket. Ironed until back got sore.

Got message from eyelash lady saying she was closing. Nooo!! This will change the future of skype calls. In 2 weeks' time I will have turned in to a bald chicken. Even the lighting in my kitchen won't be able to save me.

Tried another home workout. Hope no one saw me through the window.

Showered and sat on bed for maybe 15 minutes staring at the wall.

Ad got back early from work given the lack of flights. Saved me from the staring.

We found a new TV show to watch - hallelujah!

Asthma is playing up - have to take inhalers during tv prog and before bed.

  Sunday- Day 6: 

Bad night's sleep. Woke up in the middle of the night with tight chest and hot and sweaty. Had to take inhalers. Convinced self I have Corona. Started on my steroid inhaler in the morning. Hopefully will help.

Finished all of the washing and ironing. Every conceivable basket is empty. Am practically a domestic goddess at this point.

Binge watched 'say yes to the dress'. Have an overwhelming urge to try on swishy dresses.

Asthma has been fine today. Must be a drop in temperature combined with paranoia.

Do another home workout. It kills an hour. Ad gets back early again from work. I have dinner ready for him. Feel like a 1920s housewife. He discovers he’s brought some emergency keys home & has to go back to airport. Have to keep dinner warm for 40 mins. Miffed. Would hate being a housewife.

Watched our new TV programme. Finished new TV programme. Buggar. Now what?