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[gurlsrool]

Ilya regularly sends people gifs of himself. That’s basically canon to me. But lately I’ve been thinking about how he would also send people gifs of Shane. Confirming plans with a gif of Shane giving a thumbs up. Celebrating good news with a gif of Shane during a celly

Everyone thinks it’s just classic Rozanov being a little shit. But really, it’s the closest he gets to sending people pictures of his boy.

Isn’t he pretty? he thinks. Isn’t he cute? Can you believe he wants me? You’re all laughing, but maybe you wouldn’t be if you knew he was mine. Maybe you’d be as proud as I am. Maybe.

[ticklefighthockey]

i love that shane's whole emotional experience of heated rivalry is just him being like why is he mean to me then nice to me then mean to me then nice to me then really nice to me then really mean to me then nice to me in a way that bewilders & disconcerts me so much it briefly turns me heterosexual. and then he's mean to me again. oh it's because he's scared. yay! i can work with scared. i intend to marry him

[sunnypeachyy]

shane was too stunned to speak 🧍🏻

[katesgottareadthebooks]

Those poor people who work with David. For years they have had to hear about the Canadian treasure that is Shane Hollander. “Yes I’m taking two weeks off in June. My son is in the Stanley cup finals”

“Yes, that is my son on that billboard, he’s got a new sponsorship”

“Yes, my son has started a new charity and is running hockey camps”

I know at least one of them was hoping they get a terrible in-law, but no it’s Ilya Rozanov. So now its

“Yes, my son and his husband were over for dinner, they wanted to talk to my wife about expanding their charity. You know the one they founded together”

“Yes, I’m taking two weeks off in June. My son and his husband are in the Stanley cup finals. Yes, again.”

“Yes, we’re so happy that NHL players are going back to the Olympics. We’re hoping both of our boys get to go.”

I think David pushes off retirement just so he can keep bragging.

[dnpstardust]

I saw someone say the reason that Dan thinks they’re the same height is because he looks at Phil like this ☹️😭

[i-fear-gritty]

i know we joke that shane is so autistic that he married hockey, but what does it make harris if he loves dogs so much he made a rescue his boyfriend

[bambicoded]

firm believer that while shane has his endorsements and is the face of every commercial, ilya is making a cameo in every action movie that'll have him. im talking fast and furious, mad max, pacific rim. he's a background character in a casino scene for one of the james bond movies. he's in fucking john wick. kingsman. godzilla. you name it. and he is proud of it, calls himself a movie star, "in more movies than rose landry!" just to get a rise out of shane. he's already ripped as fuck, anyway, he fits right in.

*this post brought to you by me specifically wanting ilya to have channing tatum's cameo in bullet train as "guy on the train who thinks the illegal crime dealings is a sex thing and wants to participate". i see that for him i really do. and then he'd get to meet benito, too.

[sunnydejavuu]

imagine if some arena security guy escorting shane to the ambulance hears ilya’s name clearly when no one else does and sits with it and realizes that he may not know why hollander is so insistent on telling rozanov that he’s ok but he’ll pass on the message.

and so he gets himself into position near the visitor locker rooms and he gestures to ilya as he’s leaving said locker rooms (looking very shellshocked and quiet and scared mind you) and he takes him to the side and just says

“hey i was with hollander when they were taking him away and he kept trying to tell us to talk to you. tell you that he’s ok. man i don’t know why he was insisting but—”

and he just cuts himself off because rozanov’s face is doing something really weird?? Almost like affection?? Then it’s wiped clean and he’s rambling off this excuse of “oh we got friendly at all stars this year he must have seen me stay on the ice once he got hit okok thank you so much for message i have to go”

and the security guy watches ilya practically run to the team bus and just stands there and goes. huh. that’s weird.

then when they’re outed the guy is waking up in a cold sweat at three am thinking oh my god i was informing the man that the love of his life wasn’t dead

[cottagehillsunset]

Married Hollanov who have been on the Centaurs for a while, comfortable and happy and out, finally learning and allowing themselves to be happy and silly in public. Which is absolutely adorable to watch. Shane who, for no reason at all, just grabs Ilyas hand sometimes and holds it in his with this small, content smile. Ilya who throws his feet in Shane's lap while they wait for their flight at the airport because he gets to do that now, he gets to be a boyfriend and in love and indulge in the small things everyone else does. Both of them just giddy to love each other. Kisses on the forehead. Shane laying his head on Ilyas shoulder. Inside jokes. Both beaming at each other when they get so say "see you at home" to each other.

And it's Wyatt who, drunk after a night out celebrating a victory, pulls them both close and is like "listen, listen you guys, s' a fucking priv'ledge, bein' loved an' like, showing that". And for a second both Shane and Ilya tense up because they know Wyatt is good and kind and supportive but old habits die hard. But then Wyatt just pulls them closer and goes "m' jus' so happy for you guys, you know? We get too see y'be happy and in love and, and s'a fucking beautiful thing man, that you finally fuckin' get that, you know. And s'just, we love you guys."

And Shane just sighs with relief and can't help but laugh because he knows the Centaurs are good people, they were at their wedding, but still. He looks at Ilya only to find him already staring at him with glassy eyes and a smile. "We love you too, Hazy" he says, eyes never leaving Shane. Shane finds Ilya's hand and holds it in his. "Yeah, we really do".

[ramslambsandwolves]

Shane shortly before waking Ilya up at the cottage: ‘Hmmmmm, I can’t trap him with a baby. wait let me google……okay i definitely can’t get pregnant. Hold on…..sea-horse dads?…..nevermind…..can i adopt a baby-trap?…………no I’d just have a kid……………………okay wait what if we like coached some kids? Like they wouldn’t be ours but like- we wouldn’t be able to break-up because of the kids. Am i fucking on drugs? What the fuck am i thinking……..wait………..like a team of kids but it’s like charity…………cause men leave their children all the time but it would be a really bad look to leave a charity……………….i can make a charity and it’ll have kids and we’ll help the kids……..and Ilya likes kids…………and he likes me………..and he’ll wanna stay with me forever….so he’ll be baby trapped AND we’ll be doing a good thing.* “Ilya wake up i have an idea.”

[alex-victoires-version]

Something I wish more heated rivalry fans were aware of is pre season games. More importantly, that Ottawa and Montreal play each other for the pre season. Which means the first Ottawa vs Montreal game after Shane signs with the centaurs is a game that will have zero consequences and will not affect their playoff chances in the long run at all. Ilya Rozanov is spending that entire fucking game in the sin bin

[mymultifandomhell]

[mutinsfromthemoon]

one of the videos on the ottawa centaurs account with the most views is the one where a handful of the guys are playing football and kicking the ball to each other. one of them kicks it too hard and has to go after it and he runs out of frame, but the video keeps rolling and catches ilya pulling shane in by his waist and kissing him while shane giggles. when the player comes back, ilya backs away from shane and they both just resume playing like it’s the most natural thing in the world. and the fans in the comments absolutely lost their minds going “oh yeah the PR relationship looking a little too real” “they’re in love your honor” “omg look at shane smiling” “they love each other so much is disgusting (affectionately)” “can we talk about how lapointe is so bad at kicking ball? thank goodness he’s a hockey player” “please some of us are single” “i bet ilya sent the ball away with his mind just to have a break to kiss shane” and ilya had liked that last one.

[so-much-for-subtlety]

[lesbian-moon-gf]

Girl you are an obligate carnivore

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

her ball

[bitchass97]

Okay yes we laugh and joke about Ilya never winning an argument in that marriage, but we have proof IN THE SHOW that Shane will not stay mad at him for ANYTHING.

Shane got ghosted for 6 months and after yelling at him for 20 seconds folded under NO PRESSURE and was giggling and cheesing when Ilya came near him. STAND UP

[mutinsfromthemoon]

yuna is rearranging the living room and picking up shane’s childhood pictures to put them in a new order. she notices that one is missing and she knows exactly which one because it’s one of her favorite pictures of shane, him smiling brightly at the camera with a missing tooth. she sighs and picks up her phone to call ilya and he picks up on the third ring greeting her “hello, yuna” and she says “ilya, dear, i’m afraid you have something mine” and ilya goes “what is it?” and she replies “one of shane’s childhood picture” and ilya goes “yuna, you know i love you like a mother, yes?” and she’s like “yes, dear, i know” and ilya keeps going “i’m not returning this photo” and yuna snorts “ilya, this one is my favorite” and ilya’s like “it’s mine too” and she says “if you return it to me, i promise i’ll make a copy of every single one you like” and ilya goes “you promise?” and yuna says “i promise”. weeks later ilya is sitting there with a copy of the entire photo album.

[slaygentford]

in my ideal world they grew up as neighbors inseparable since age 6 which was the first time Ilya went home to Irina and was like I’m going to marry my Shane. And every year he’d be like I’m going to marry my Shane even in middle school and high school when everything was weird and stressful and full of high school horrors he was still privately like I’m going to do whatever I can to marry my shane. and then he marries his Shane.