23 Promises Every Girl Should Make To Herself And Keep Forever To the girls who don’t yet know that there are differences in this world — to the ones who are learning, slowly, that there are certain paths we’re told not to walk, to the ones who are too scared to fight back against the walls keeping them from the greener grass on the other side: Don’t hold back, don’t feel confined to the box you’re currently standing in; don’t feel limited to the rules people tell you to follow; don’t feel like you’re not worth more. You are. You are ambition, you are power, you are sugar and rain and strong coffee and cheap cigarettes. You are determination, you are beautiful, you are ice when the world needs cooling and heat when the winds roll in. You are honey and cinnamon. You are poise and you are praise. You are the makers of promises, the dreamers of dreams. So dream. Promise. And do it unapologetically because you are everything that is exciting and intoxicating about tomorrow. You are every reason to hope. 1. I promise to love this body, through good and bad, to respect it, to treat it with kindness and to feed it with appreciation always. 2. I promise to stop and smell the roses – to savor how I look and feel today and to accept that it’s never going to get better than this moment, right now, right here. 3. I promise never to be foolish enough to believe that there is any reason to be anyone other than me. 4. I promise to date the Wrong Guy, the Right Guy, the Mr. Right Now, the Mr. He’s-Just-Not-That-Into-Me Guy. I promise to date the guys who make my heart feel full of gladness and the guys who sometimes treat me wrong. Then, I promise to know better and stick the douchey guys on the bench. 5. I promise to make mistakes – lots of mistakes, to go eagerly down the wrong road, to venture way off course. I promise not to play it safe. 6. And I promise to forgive myself wholeheartedly. I promise not to punish myself forever for things I did when I was sad, when I was happy, when I was young, when I was drunk, when I was lost on side street after side street in a European country where I didn’t even speak the language. 7. I promise never to keep my mouth shut, to speak up when I know my voice needs to be heard, to shout louder when it’s ignored. I promise not to apologize for how I feel, for what I believe in, for what I stand for. I promise never to offer an apology just because it’s easy or expected or even encouraged. 8. I promise – today, tomorrow and every day – to put myself first, to chase after the things I want and never to settle for anything less than I know I deserve. 9. I promise never to confuse the man who loves me for my body and the man who loves me for my mind – and I promise never to settle for a man who doesn’t love me for both. 10. I promise to value my brain. To feed it well, with words and songs and lectures and books and movies and recipes and birthdays. I promise to cultivate and nurture it. To watch it grow strong. 11. I promise to pay it forward, to do what other women have done for me to other women. 12. I promise to give everyone a chance, even though it might be terrifying and risky and stupid and scary. I promise to step outside my comfort zone often. 13. I promise to know that being a woman always is enough. I promise never to feel limited or objectified or to feel that my body is the only thing people are interested in. 14. I promise to call my parents, even though I only have five minutes to talk and even though I’m about to lose service because the subway is beginning its slow dive underground. I promise to ask them how they’re feeling, to miss them, to love them and to argue with them, to disagree with them and always, always to look after them. 15. I promise to drink too much, to sleep too late, to dance too hard, to stretch too long, to sing too loud and to eat too many nachos every time I have the chance. 16. I promise to be proud of how far I’ve come – even though I’m still going. I promise to look back not with pity or vengeance, but with gratitude. I’ve made it this far. 17. I promise to forgive and not to forget, to let time heal the wounds and to carry what I have learned so far with me as I go forward. I promise not to let that sadness drag me down. I promise not to wish ill on past lovers. I promise to send them light, to let them go — and to move forward. 18. I promise to cry my eyes out each time my heart is broken, each time my emotions are wronged, each time it feels like I’ve singed every artery capable of love. I promise to let myself have the time, space and Netflix it needs to grieve. And I promise not to apologize for it. 19. I promise to put on the too-high heels, the too-bright red lipstick and the too-short dress and not to mistake my femininity with “asking for it” or “sluttiness.” I promise to celebrate these curves, this ass, this shape, these boobs, this skin-baring midriff because they’re mine. 20. I promise to be patient when things don’t go my way – to step back and realize that it’s all a process, and a journey like this doesn’t come together all at once, but piece by piece. 21. I promise to allow myself the opportunity to be jealous. To sit with it and to ask it questions but never to be governed by it. I promise to see it as room to grow and not the concrete tied to my ankles, holding me down. 22. I promise to make plans for tomorrow and today and for three weeks from now. I promise never to stop planning, always to want something more, always to plan for something greater and bigger and more exciting than the things I know today. 23. I promise to love. Always. To give it and to receive it, even when the giver isn’t worthy and when I don’t think I am, either. I promise to let it flow freely from me because it is the one thing that is bigger than I am – that will always be bigger than I am. I promise to love even though it is the single most terrifying act any of us will ever do. I promise to give love and to take love when I need it least and when I need it most.
Kylie Mcconville (via newyorktoparis)
