Wilderness Calling

Jess - 21 - Colorado

[beeftea78-deactivated20200113]

I like to call my chickens “beasties” or “fat little monster trucks” and other such affectionate terms, but dad seems to take offence whenever I do and always gently refers to them as “the girls,” “the ladies” and sometimes “the dames” when he’s putting them away, like he’s a butler shepherding a group of well-bred country lasses into the parlour for tea 

[sekiss-blog1]

this post evokes such a pleasing mental image that my depression was completely cured for 5 and a half minutes

[kakkapyllypylly]

[super-affection]

what kind of snake is this

[toni-hiatus]

A vicious one

[literallyaflame]

letting my mom watch queer eye was a mistake. she just walked into my room, pointed at some clothes on my floor and said “hey. what would tan say about this???” and i just shuffled over to pick them up like a sad child cause i would want tan france to be proud of me :( fuck :(

[babyangel-jpg]

Guys really be out here thinking I won’t smash a wine bottle over their head

[bitter-badfem-harpy]

I recommend a beer bottle or a glass tumbler. Wine bottles are very hard to shatter, and you’re more likely to split a man’s skull open and cause permanent “attempted murder”-type brain damage, and you want to teach them a lesson not, like, become a convicted felon.

[gaysexhaver666]

Nice, Thanks for the tip! I’m not a pussy and i can bury a body, but this could help someone else!

[mysterymeat6649127739816]

[ofallthehappy-deactivated202004]

squad

[bopeep]

we dem b o y z

[with-drops-of-jupiter]

I C A N N O T breathe

[wdwpres-deactivated20190130]

THAT LAST LIKE .01 SECOND

[communistbakery-deactivated2017]

OH MY G OD

[featherywingss]

My phone at 1% battery: finally,,,,the sweet embrace of death,,,,,,my codes are clearing,,,,,,,my burdens are lifted,,,,,,,,,,,,

Me, jamming the charger in seconds before it shuts off: you’re gonna stay alive and suffer like the rest of us you lazy bitch

[swagintherain]

setup and punchline

[lord-kitschener]

The artist is luo li rong

[cecaeliawitch]

The statue doesn’t have big enough titties to have been made by a man.

[radgoblin]

I know I’ve reblogged this before but the schadenfreude is too delicious.

[gehayi]

By the way, the statue is called  La mélodie oubliée (The Forgotten Melody). Luo Li Rong also painted it:

And here she and the statue are in a more formal setting (museum or art show, I can’t tell):

[theepoetspoet]

“Dork ass losers”

[asymbina]

OK not only do I think she’s a sorceress but now I have a massive crush on her

[chaarmandeeer-deactivated201904]

[okaytrue]

*comes across a slight inconvenience* me: you know what would solve this ????? death

[a-spicy-memes]

[abolish-everything-deactivated2]

They never had a chance

[spikeghost-deactivated20240530]

what happened in 1845?

[gaycave]

That’s not the year, that’s his kill streak.

[propheticfire]

[hotvampireadjacent]

this is what living in the midwest is like and the corn screams back sometimes

[whenthingsgoterriblywrong]

[vix-en]

this fucking never fails to make me laugh

[foosili]

Birthday

[emeryradio-deactivated20240912]

[instrumental chorus of “We Like to Party” (the Six Flags song) plays in the foreground]

masculine voice, seven seconds in: “You’re all animals.”

[jxey]

[little-yogi]

[nectarinejam]