A Black Muslim Miss 20 something//A chronic online fangirl who's a fanfic defender/ENFP/she♡they/Sydcarmy Truther/Ayo Edebiri & Sydney Adamu Supporter/Multifandom//
I just commented this on a Reddit post (r/thatsfirechef) and thought I would share it here as well. If anyone responds to this, I probably won’t be responding back until mid July, just an FYI, but I wanted to post it before the final season drops:
Like, I’m not even a shipper, it’s not ever something I’ve done, but I get that it’s something that some fans do and like. And even thought I’m not a shipper, I DO in fact root for certain relationships because I feel invested in the characters’ growth, and this applies to Carmy and Sydney on this show.
Even outside of romantic dynamic, both of these characters are portrayed as being GOOD for each other’s growth: Sydney needs the help, guidance, support, and brainstorming power of Carmy so that she can grow in the areas that she is weak in (dependence/reliance on others versus the hyper-independence she has at times, vulnerability, healthy guardedness versus the unhealthy guardedness she exhibits at times, fear of failure); Carmy needs the compassion, guidance, accountability, and ingenuity of Sydney so that he can grow in the areas that he is weak in (self-esteem/empowerment versus the self-deprivation he exhibits, self-respect versus the self-sabotaging tendencies he has, selflessness, fear of the other shoe dropping when things feel good or peaceful to him).
And then they BOTH need to grow in the area of communication: Sydney’s is hindered due to her fear of vulnerability, and it may stem from a fear of rejection due to her possibly expressing vulnerability in the past and being dismissed or not heard. Carmy’s is hindered due to what he admitted to Natalie back in season 1: he doesn’t always know what he’s feeling, so due to him being a sensitive person who feels his emotions deeply, that what he knows he needs to be able to communicate, but it’s very difficult for him.
Sydney desires to be HEARD, she tells Carmy this in S1E3, that he “just didn’t listen” to her. Unfortunately, his character has continued to struggle in this area, and so while he has intended to do and give her what she wants, he has failed in actually listening to what she REALLY wants. So, her desire is to be heard most by CARMY.
Carmy desires to figure out WHAT he FEELS, and to properly express it to who he is desiring to express it to. Sydney, while she is compassionate enough to validate his feelings, and mature enough to still hold him accountable for his actions, she lacks the awareness to recognize the positive impact that she has had on Carmy, to the point that he likes the time he gets to spend with her, even if it’s not centered around cooking (see S1E3, I gather that from how he looks at her after she jokes with him and in S4E1), and she attributes his response to him being miserable. So, he desires to properly express his feelings to SYDNEY more than anyone else.
This is why I personally root for them, and why I care about this relationship more than I do any other one on this show. I get that many love other characters on here, but it’s VERY interesting to me (and I know I’m veering off of the topic here) how some fans of this show either ignore Carmy and Sydney, or attempt to dismiss the importance of their relationship on this show.
There’s literally no other dynamic on this show like theirs (and I LOVE what this show has done with Sydney and Richie and then Carmy and Tina, for example), and I’m interested and excited to see how this show wraps things up with them.
I wanted to add (didn’t post in the my Reddit comment) that I enjoy what this show has done, because I’ve never seen a relationship portrayed like Carmy’s and Sydney’s before (it probably shows my lack of tv and movie watching lol, but oh well). IMO, it’s been done in not only a unique way, but in a very beautiful way, and I hope that more relationships could be portrayed in this way on tv and in movies, because I appreciate the depth that their relationship has.
MICHAEL is officially the biggest music biopic of all time. i am so insanely proud of jaafar and everything he brought into this movie. he must have felt the weight of the world and so much pressure, and to see it play out like this is so beautiful. i remember when it was first announced that he was going to be doing it and now look at him!! this is so well deserved; polish the damn oscar! he wanted to wipe his uncles slate clean and show his humanity, and that’s exactly what he did. THIS SHIT MEAN SOMETHING TO ME MAN!
There had better be some actual effort from Carmy - if Sydney forgives him behind the scenes I will lose it.
To me, Carmy retiring is still him running away. He needs therapy, needs to find his way forward, but the whole series we see him run after something external to “fix” him. Even when he retires, his past, his trauma, grief, and his brother will still be waiting. It’s easy to be like oh I just need Al-Anon, my dream restaurant, my (alleged) dream girl, my mom’s approval, retirement…. that isn’t a magic fix. Each time, he figures it out too late that these things didn’t fix him, and he plummets further into crisis.
And I get Sydney’s emotional distance! Over and over, Sydney has been left to pick up the pieces, to look after him, his family, and his restaurant. And even by the end of s4, he still deflects her fear and anger instead of engaging. Their relationship doesn’t really leave the restaurant, and she must be so exhausted (Richie too, like he has always been a menace lol).
She gets to matter too, you know? That still matters, even if Carmy is in crisis.
I get the romance of him doing one thing right while soft music plays and suddenly Sydney forgives Carmy and is really in love with him, but that would be such a betrayal of her character. I love Carmy so much, I relate to him in so many ways, and I’m deeply invested in him finding peace and happiness. But not at Sydney’s expense. And he really, really hurt/betrayed her this time.
The way that the show has handled Sydney’s character has been so frustrating. I don’t know how eight final episodes can deliver; it’s kind of killed my writing for them.
I also feel like Charlie Brown with that fucking football where sydcarmy is concerned lol. I want to hope - I have this massive post-s4 story half-written but I kinda want to read the last page of this story before I get invested any further.
Black ppl deserve to feel safe and welcomed on the internet, on fandoms on whatever community or hobbies they want without having to deal with antiblack racist attacks, microaggressions or enablers of antiblackness . And if u genuinely consider urself to be left leaning or an ally or woke you should do and try to unlearn the colorism, texturism , eurocentrism and antiblackness
For anyone looking an explanation of the historical and contemporary tensions between the Black and Asian American community, and how that, too, is structural and fueled to benefit white supremacy. Proximity to Whiteness will never be Whiteness!
annaxmalina
izzy806
baratheonpilled
jbbartram-illu
stormborns
titsay
