I had been feeling uneasy about my relationship with Ai. A calm coffee date with my friend Ruki a week after our date in Roppongi helped put my mind at ease for the time being. Ruki was a host working in Kabukicho who I had befriended online. He was a sweet, hardworking guy with hair nearly identical to my own. He was exactly who I needed to hear reassuring words from.
  A little over a week after seeing Ruki, I was meeting Ai for a large circle event called Dance Groove. It was being hosted this year by several different Shibuya event circles including my own at club Flower in Roppongi. I had been preparing for months but things went far from smoothly. The day began with the sudden realization that I hadnât booked a hair-set at a salon. I couldnât find a salon with an open appointment so I set to work on my own hair.
  Stressed at the thought of being late, I struggled to style and re-style my hair until I was satisfied enough that I could get myself out the door. I arrived in Roppongi late enough to miss taking group photos with everyone else who was going friends but early enough that the event hadnât started. I used the spare time I had to grab some coffee.
  I met up with everyone to take some quick purikura before we headed to the club to set up. While putting my bag in a locker, I realized I had forgotten my camera and my phone had no service inside of the club. Ai was supposed to come tonight. I was excited and nervous. How would he contact me if I couldnât get a signal? Would he be late again? I didnât have too much time to ponder before I got caught up with the final preparations.
  The event got started without a hitch but Ai was nowhere in sight. I kind of expected that he would be late but I decided to wander around the club trying to find a spot where I could get a signal. When I finally found an area, my phone immediately buzzed. Ai had called and texted me to let me know he was 45 minutes late but waiting in the line outside. I donât know how many time I told him not to be late to this event. I knew the line would be huge. We were expecting more than 1,000 people this year because 20 different event circles were participating. Now I was worried that he might not get in at all.
  While waiting for Ai, I got roped into helping distribute pamphlets. I was completely consumed with work by the time he got into the event. There were only three of us passing out pamphlets so it took nearly an hour before I finished. As soon as I was done, I rushed to find Ai. He had been entertaining himself by talking to someone he met at the event. Finally, we could spend time together.
  He was much more distant than usual. He was awkward around each person I tried to introduce him to and seemed not to want to really participate in the event. I asked him if anything was wrong. He said he didnât understand what I was talking about, that he was acting normally. I wondered if the stress from earlier was making me too sensitive until I tried to kiss him. It was just a peck on the cheek but he pulled away. I nearly began to cry. What was going on? I had no idea why he was acting this was. Suddenly, I just wanted Dance Groove to end.
  Ai kept gravitating back towards the guy he had been talking to when I found him. Apparently the two started talking about business. I was hurt, frustrated, and saddened by the fact that Ai was so absorbed in his conversations with this guy. I had worked so hard on this event. I was proud of it. I was proud of Ai as well which is why I wanted him to meet my friends. I tried to be positive. I kept telling myself that he was probably just a bit uncomfortable since everyone at the event was younger than him. I was sure things would be back to normal once it was just the two of us again.
  As the event was wrapping up, Ai told me he would wait outside for me while I finished my duties. I was looking forward to a nice, relaxing dinner with him. I finished up as quickly as I could then hurried outside. It couldnât have taken me more than 10 minutes to wrap everything up but Ai was gone. When I called him, he told me he had gone out to eat with the guy he met at the event and his friends. I couldnât believe what I was hearing. He told me to go have dinner with my circle and meet him later. It was almost 8âo clock at this point so I knew I would be lucky to see him for an hour.
  I tried my best to enjoy myself at dinner but everyone could tell something was wrong. I finally broke down in tears as I explained what happened. My best friend at the time, Ash, immediately took my phone and called Ai. He didnât pick up so she left an angry voicemail telling him that he had made me cry.
  Exhausted and feeling defeated, I decided to head home after dinner. I cried a bit more on the way home but was mostly fine by the time I fell into my bed. It was around 9âo clock now when Ai phoned me back. He apologized, saying that he still wanted to see me tonight but only if I could meet him in Shinjuku. I agreed, fixed my make-up, and said I would be at the station by 10:30.
  10:30 came and went without any sign of Ai. He finally messaged me to let me know he was still in Roppongi but was heading my way. Itâs only a 25 minutes train ride between the two stations so I found a comfortable place to wait. 45 minutes went by without any word. Before I realized it, 45 minutes had turned into an hour and a half. He suggested that I go to the eventâs after party to wait for him. Despite how annoyed I was, I explained to him that I didnât have the money to go to it even if I wanted to.
  Finally, my phone rang. It was Ai telling me he was in Shibuya. I had just come here from Shibuya...nearly two hours ago. I finally lost my temper. I yelled and he yelled back. Then I heard something in the background that made me even angrier. He was still with the guys from Roppongi. What was he thinking? Why was he still with them? I let my anger get the best of me. I was so angry at Ai. He had left me sitting in Shinjuku for hours and now he was yelling at me. Ai eventually told me that what he was doing was for his business and I could be doing a lot better if I didnât spend my free time sitting around. I couldnât hold back my tears. At this point, I couldnât understand his Japanese either. He ended up hanging up on me without calling back.
  I called Ash until she picked up. Sobbing my way through a mostly incoherent recounting of my argument with Ai, I asked her how I should get home now that the trains had stopped running. She eventually calmed me down enough to explain that I actually had a little less than an hour before they stopped so I could go home if I wanted to. There were still trains! I was so relieved. Finally, things werenât as bad as I thought.
  The first thing I did was to call Ai back. I asked him whether or not I should go to Shibuya to meet him or stay in Shinjuku. Ai told me to wait. He said he would come get me. As the last train approached, I started to wonder if he was really on his way but he eventually arrived at 1:30...but he was not alone.
  Ai was still with the same group of guys he had gone to dinner with. I apologized for yelling because I didnât want to embarrass myself in front of his new friends. This was the first time I ever lied my way through an apology. Then he said he was sorry as well. We left it at that as just the two of us headed to find some food. We decided on ramen which Ai ordered for me while I went to freshen up in the washroom.
  We were finally able to talk calmly about why I was upset. By the end of our conversation, I was relieved that Ai seemed to understand my feelings much better. He kept apologizing for being late all the time before reminding me that he needed to meet back up with the group from before. I laughed at the thought of me being an accomplice to Aiâs lateness for once. Things were much calmer now so I went with him to meet the group from Dance Groove.
June came and I had another date with Ai. We planned to meet in Ueno at noon but Ai texted me that morning to say that he wouldnât be free until a little after one. The message woke me but I went almost immediately went back to sleep. When I woke up, I realized I had overslept. This time I would be the one running behind schedule. I quickly messaged Ai to let him know I would be half an hour late, got ready as quickly as I could, and rushed out the door.
On the train ride to Ueno, I got a message from him telling me to meet him in Roppongi instead. Roppongi is on the opposite side of Tokyo was Ueno so I let Ai know I would be there at around 2:30. I was a bit relieved at the location change since I knew Ai would also have to catch a train to Roppongi so we would be arriving at roughly the same time.
 Just as I anticipated, my train pulled in right at 2:30 but there was no word from Ai. I waited at the station for half an hour...then an hour...then I finally messaged him to ask him where he was. Ai replied to tell me he was at Tokyo Station. I couldnât figure out why heâd be there but I didnât say anything. Instead, I continued to wait patiently for his arrival. It doesnât take long to get from Tokyo Station to Roppongi so I let my frustration turn to excitement at the thought of spending the day with him.
 After half an hour more had passed, there was still no sign of Ai. He also wasnât answering his phone. Had something happened? I had no idea so I kept waiting. He finally arrived in Roppongi at 4:30. The first thing out of my mouth was âwhere were you?â
He explained to me that he went to Tokyo Station to get his watched fixed and it took longer than he expected. I reminded him that I said I would be there are 2:30 but quickly stopped myself from yelling at him. I was too worn down from waiting for so long that I just wanted to get on with our date instead of arguing.
We eventually made our way to Roppongi Hills. He had used up most of the time we had for our date getting his watched fixed but wanted to go to a planetarium show nevertheless. We held hands romantically as we gazed up at the constellations on the ceiling. It was so beautiful. After the planetarium, he went to a nearby bar to watch the sun set.
Ai apologized for being so late and not making time for me more often. I told him that it wouldnât take much time to mail me regularly. He explained how busy he had been lately because he was going to quit hosting to work on his own projects. He wants to open his own bar. As we finished our drinks, he told me that he wonât be able to see me for a while because is getting several cosmetic surgery procedures which will keep him confined to his house. He told me to look on the Brightside because he will have the time to mail me more often while he recovers.
With that we finished our drinks before making our way to the shops on the ground level. We looked at watches in some of the shops because Ai collects them. I pointed out the irony of the situation since he is never on time. He laughed but told me that he canât help that things always come up at the last minute when he is trying to meet me. We started to argue a bit about how inconsiderate he is with other peopleâs time. He eventually agreed with me that he needs to be better at managing his time. He promised not to be late again.
We continued to shop until everything began to close. I stayed with him until the very last train. While I still hate parting with him, I felt like we had made some progress with our relationship today. Maybe, just maybe we understood each other a little bit more.
  The first few months of our relationship were a constant stream of new experiences. Ai opened up a whole new world for me as he took me places, taught me new words, and pushed me to challenge myself. The excitement from being with him made me overlook how he never managed to be on time for anything. I often waited hours and hours for him.
Towards the end of May, I met Ai for a date in Ikebukuro. This was a pretty typical date for us. I had spent the day shopping for a fan in Asakusa with my friend Ryuu. After finally finding something that would match my yukata, we took some purikura before parting ways. Then I went to wait for Ai.
I had bought him a small cellphone charm while I was out shopping. It was a cute, cube-shaped, black cat. I knew he would like that I had thought about him enough to get him something, even though it was small and inexpensive.
Ai texted me after I had waited for a long time. Not too late but still...late. He told me he had seen an advertisement for a restaurant in Akabane that had made him think of me so we decided to go there. It ended up being closed when we got there so we headed to a darts bar near Sunshine City. Ai hit it off with the bartender pretty quickly. We let the night slip away as we talked, drank, played darts, and he taught me billiards. Ai was as patient as ever, carefully teaching me the rules for billiards since I had only played once or twice before.
We spent the next day together as well. I had been looking forward to our date for a while. We were originally supposed to meet nearly a week beforehand but Ai had to cancel. I understood his reasoning for cancelling but was bothered by his timing. He called me a 3 a.m. on the morning of our date to tell me that he had to stay in his hometown in Akita longer than heâd expected. He promised to make it up to me later by taking me to an amusement park in Suidobashi, about 30 minutes from Shibuya. On the day of our date, Ai asked me to meet him at the amusement park. I arrived a bit early but Ai was late...again. He was only 45 minutes late this time. I say only because he was routinely two or three hours late.
Rather than being upset with Ai, I always seemed to be overcome by happiness when we got to spend time together. This time was no different. Sometimes we would argue about his lateness but I usually tried my best to just enjoy the time I had with him instead of wasting it fighting. I began to lecture him but stopped myself. I knew Ai always felt bad when he would frustrate me and that was good enough.
He told me all about his trip back home as we walked from the station to the amusement park. He even got me a souvenir. He watched with anticipation as I opened the small package he pulled from his pocket. It was a small, onyx bracelet which he explained to me was supposed to give strength to whoever wears it.
On a rainy February morning in 2011, I met an extraordinary person who would change my life. His name was Ai. It happened when I was walking home and a man suddenly popped underneath my umbrella. He was a tall, flashy host. As is pretty usual in Kabukicho when youâre being touted, he asked me to listen to his request.
I was wary at first. Partly because of where I was but mostly because I could barely understand the quickly spoken, formal language he was using. From what I gathered, the customer who had reserved him for the night had cancelled so he needed a last minute replacement. After he offered to pay for all my expenses, I agreed to go with him.
We ate breakfast together first. While we ate, he listened intently to the story of how I came to Japan. Without ever once losing interest, he patiently sat there as I stumbled through an explanation of my future plans as well. I told him that I wanted to stay in Japan forever despite only coming here on a temporary visa and how I planned to switch my visa. I explained that I could get a work or marriage visa, be adopted by a Japanese person, and so on. My determination seemed to delite him.
Ai was the first person to ever show me this kind of interest. My Japanese was terrible at this point but I could tell he took me seriously nevertheless. He carefully explained each word of his that I didnât understand until we were able to have a real conversation.
We drank at his club from the beginning of his shift until the club closed. Afterwards, we went for Karaoke in Shinjuku where he showed me his beautiful voice. Finally, with both of us exhausted, he suggested that we go to a love hotel to catch a few hours of sleep. He promised emphatically that he wouldnât try anything funny and he kept that promise. After sneaking a quick kiss on my lips, he walked me all the way back to my apartment.
On the way back, he resumed the subject of how I could stay in Japan forever. He told me that marriage would be the best option. With that, Ai dropped me off at home and our relationship began.
From that day forward, Ai grabbed my attention more than anyone else ever could. He was someone I could talk endlessly with. It took us only a few more dates before we officially began labelling ourselves as boyfriend and girlfriend.
Ai no Sanji follows the story of one galâs passionate, obsessive love affair with a host named Ai that began on the streets of Kabukicho one rainy February morning. As she struggled to maintain her party-driven gyaru lifestyle in Japan, that love seemed to slip completely from her grasp. But was it ever really there to begin with?
The posts here have been adapted from ningyo-sekai.blogspot.com. The majority of the events take place between 2011 and 2012. I have used some of her words, added many of my own, and done my best to leave all of the important details unaltered. However, I will gladly delete this tumblr if the original owner of the blog asks me to.Â
I will be posting the story in weekly chapters with a new post each Saturday. In between, I will reblog pictures relevant to the story chapters. Â
kianamaiart
2087
pixelskylines
areudirty
turnnoffyourmind
prguitarman