♠️ AceInvaders! ♠️

❤️🧡💛(an inclusionist blog)💚💙💜

[alienaceinvaders]

❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

This is the end of the queue; taking a little break from discourse hell.

[softcore-revolutionary]

Saying that lgbt+ people didn’t exist before there were terms to describe them is such an odd concept to me. It would be like saying people with vision problems didn’t exist before glasses. People with vision problems have always existed, it was just a lot harder because they didn’t have ways of coping. They didn’t have glasses or a diagnosis.

The labels we’ve created for ourselves are not just new age, pandering made up terms. Gays and bisexuals and trans people have always existed. They just didn’t have a word for it.

[pom-seedss]

Yes!

Or they had other words!

Like, there is a huge difference in acknowledging that across time and culture things might be categorized differently and saying “you can’t call [Historical Figure] bisexual because that’s ahistorical!”

Acknowledging that across time and cultures there are different ways of categorizing the human experience which won’t always align with our modern categories and definitions is important, but if you are trying to use the ahistorical argument to dissuade queer and LGBTQIA+ folks from identifying with historical figures or using them as examples to show that folks LIKE us have always existed? That’s just bigotry.

Terms, definitions, conceptions and categories can all change, but that doesn’t mean that there isn’t a shared experience under it all. Recognizing that experience isn’t ahistorical.

[boygirlz]

The ace/aro community has really made a joke of itself by repeatedly pushing for cishet & kink/pedophile inclusion, obnoxiously taking up space in the lgbt+ community spouting toxic homophobic shit, irl and online

Lgbt+ ace/aros are the only ones I care about the rest of y'all are.. makin a fool of urselves

[soacethetic]

1) Pushing for kink/pedophilia (EDIT: or cishet??? Unless u equate ace with straight in which case,,,) inclusion where? U can’t just go around claiming that with no evidence. (David Jay doesn’t count — he’s one (1) asshole, who’s not even straight)

2) Where is this evidence that the ace/aro community is More Problematic than any other subgroup? Ofc there r lots of issues but it’s still relative to everyone else

3) The aro/ace community includes the lgbt a-specs u apparently care about, so what one is it? U say it’s the cishets but then mock aces in general for having pride???

[glitter-butch-deactivated201802]

Honestly at this point I just straight up assume you’re probably a shitty person if you identify as ace/aro. Like I don’t give a fuck if you don’t have sex or experience “attraction” or whatever, but if you’re using those words to describe yourself you’re choosing to align yourself with a pretty disgusting group of people, and you better be bending over backward to be fighting the shit I see in the ace/aro community if you want me to take you seriously. I know not every ace/aro person is literally out here supporting pedophiles or making fun of AIDS or harassing mass shooting victims, but most of them are not doing enough about the people in their community who are.

[youareagoodperson]

Imagine the outrage if op was saying this about any other orientation, anyway op please delete your blog and your ideas

[kwrpwr]

well, “any other orientation” is a little too broad- people would probably reblog this post if it was about straight people

[youareagoodperson]

Sad but true, good point

[solarpunkstargazer-blog]

I’m so mad lmao holy hell

A major gripe I have with aphobes on this site is they act like being a-spec is an opt-in type of identity, like a political alignment or hobby discriptor, and not a set of names that describe an intrinsic part of a person.  It ties into the whole “asexuality is not having sex”/”aromanticism is not liking to date”/”a-spec orientations are actually just actions” bs that they seem unwilling to let go of.

I can’t opt out of being asexual.  Me choosing to reject the label is called “putting myself in the closet” and “denying my sexuality”, not “unaligning myself with other evil a-specs”.

And “[Y]ou better be bending over backward to be fighting the shit I see in the ace/aro community if you want me to take you seriously” is just the most audacious shit I’ve ever read.  The fuck do you want me to do OP?  I can’t kick people out of being a-spec, and shitty people aren’t gonna change just cause some rando told them they’re not being very nice.

(But most importantly: how dare you say the only way my struggles as a minority group will only be taken seriously by you if I “bend over backwards” to follow your orders??  My struggles aren’t only valid when I perform to your specifications, who the fuck do you think you are?  Callouts are important but hinging your allyship on how much I do them is just so utterly fucked up.)

The comparison with straight people is pretty apt though: I’ve noticed that a lot of people tend to treat a-spec orientations as they would heterosexuality, and aphobia as they would “heterophobia”.  Hence the complete lack of shame when putting “OP is an aphobe” as their title like they aren’t literally announcing they’re prejudiced against a minority group.

Anyway: it is literally prejudiced to assume that a whole group of people are bad just because of their sexual orientation, even if there’s a minority of that group that are openly shitty people.  This is literally “How Not to Be a Bigot 101″ OP how did you miss that class.

[letsallchillok]

Op says they feel that way about straight people too, so like, what… Straight people aren’t allowed to call themselves straight anymore? Should they just claim that they’re LGBT+ instead? lol

[chelonianmobile]

Of course! That way OP has more people to scream at.

[acepilotlombardi]

Riddle me this, discoursers:

I’m ace/aro and nonbinary. If a-spec orientations are modifiers, what are they modifying?

[eggcav3e]

They modify orientations. Since you’re both aro and ace, you don’t have one.

[acepilotlombardi]

In that case, how is asexual not my orientation?

[eggcav3e]

It can’t be an orientation because it is a modifier. Orientation = which genders you’re attracted to. Since you aren’t attracted to anyone, you don’t have an orientation.

[acepilotlombardi]

What is is modifying, though?

Because if I don’t have an orientation, it’s not modifying that.

[bihetnaomi]

at this point i cant tell if sga discoursers are trolling or not

[certifiedacehet]

im in tears

[f-e-m-i-n-i-s-m]

https://yourlogicalfallacyis.com/begging-the-question

[a-polite-melody]

“Orientation = which genders you’re attracted to. Since you aren’t attracted to anyone, you don’t have an orientation.”

Asexuality does answer the question of which genders the person is attracted to. That answer is none.

Asexuality is, by their definition, an orientation. So, uh, why is this still an issue? Why do people still think that the asexuality is a modifier argument is still a good argument against aspec inclusion?

[acelations]

“If aces can choose whether or not to identify as part of the LGBT+ community then that means they’re not inherently LGBT+!”

Translation: apparently I don’t realize that people can choose whether or not to be part of the community. There are gay people, and lesbians, and bi people, and trans people that choose not to be part of the LGBT+ community, but when aces do it suddenly it’s bad.

[king-satan-nipple]

Does anyone else remember when the LGBTA community would fight to the death to keep people from saying the “A meant Ally”? Does anyone else remember when Asexuals/Aromantics were welcomed and safe in the LGBTA community? Remember when the LGBTA community didnt care where you fell on the A-spectrum? If you were heteromantic asexual or aromantic heterosexual, the A meant you were part of our community.

And you know what? It still fucking does and I will participate in fighting the gatekeepers and LGB police because if there is ANYONE who doesnt belong in the LGBTA community, its people who turn their backs on those that need help.

Listen to me, kids. If you’re trans-you’re LGBTA. If you’re ace/aro/aspec- you’re LGBTA. If you’re homosexual(gay/lesbian)-you’re LGBTA. If you’re pan/poly/bisexual- you’re LGBTA.

If you’re some jackass that tells people they dont belong or that they arent “oppressed enough”, you dont deserve to be LGBTA.

[botharelightweights]

lmao I always use LGBTQ or LGBTQIA, and the “Q” is literally just queer or questioning which included aces and every other form of non-cis/straight.

[justaphobethings]

Hoo boy can you tell me about the HBTQ discourse? Bc as a Swede I find that hilarious (we don't even have the noun lesbian in our language and gay isn't a proper Swedish word)

An aphobe tried to claim that the Q was never part of the lgbt+ acronym so someone brought up the HBTQ one as a counterpoint. So of course aphobes flipped out and thought it was some kind of Evil Acey plot against lesbians. Because by their logic lesbians aren’t included under homosexual.

[femboy-fever]

It is an absolutely fine evening to remember that asexuals are LGBT+.

[moss-enthusiast]

Ur not inherently queer for being aro/ace lmao

[femboy-fever]

It’s a great morning to remember that you’re inherently LGBT+ if you are ace or aro!!!

[tenitchyfingers]

@gay-achilles might want to read up on some queer history that got erased to the point one has to do a lot of digging to find out about it. Or it got straight up forgotten. There are sources in this post, but I’m linking the post itself because it’s got some excellent commentary about these sources.

https://assemble-the-fangirls.tumblr.com/post/150505554371/autismserenity-fornaxed-good-lord-im-not

One among many examples of queer history erasure: this

was changed into

and here’s an excellent post about it. 

Here’s a very good post about “is queer a slur or not”. tl;dr: nobody is pushing the label on you. If someone says “queer community” they simply are not talking about you. And if you hear someone calling themselves “queer”, that’s their decision, that’s a word that’s been reclaimed and it’s well within their right to use it to describe themselves. 

And here’s a post about how many of us were there since way before “asexual” even came up as a label. We were in the bi community. We were bi. Some of us are still in the bi community. Some of us still identify as bi. You can’t say we’re “invading” anything, because we were always there. Now, exclusionism? That’s a recent trend. Just sayin’…

[bladeobrona]

2015: THE A STANDS FOR ASEXUAL NOT ALLY!!! STOP EXCLUDING ASEXUALS AND AROMANTICS FROM THE LGBTA+!!!

2016: Asexuals are not LGBTA+! The A always stood for ally and asexuals are straight.

Y’all are just assholes is what you are. Stop excluding asexuals and aromantics from the LGBTA+ and stop being a bigot.

[discuorse]

they are in the lgbt community just not gay… like some trans ppl are straight but that doesn’t exclude them from the community

[arrrrrrrrrek-deactivated2023052]

OMGWTF? im honestly so done with people who think A means Ally…..The thing is people can support racial minorities or other minorities but in no way are they be a part of the minority… like.. I can support women and gender equality all I want but i aint a lady. A white person can support the Black lives matter movement as much as they want but that doesn’t mean they can be included in the black community, because you know what? THEY ARE NOT BLACK.

Same goes for the “A". Allies can support the LGBTA community all they want, and i appreciate them so so so much, BUT… They are allies because they are NOT of the LGBTA community.

[deactivated-blog]

i couldnt find it in your blog so sorry if youve already answered but what were the statistics for the prefered acronyms people used?

In regards the umbrella term usage:

66.9% of respondents held that Queer is a suitable umbrella term.

40.2% of respondents held that MOGAI is a suitable umbrella term.

34.3% held that LGBT[…]+ variations are suitable umbrella terms.

32.4% of respondents held that QUILTBAG is a suitable umbrella term.

25.6% held that IMOGA is a suitable umbrella term. 

25.3% held that GSRM is a suitable umbrella term.

12.2% of respondents stated that they exclusively use non-LGBT[…]+ umbrella terms such as queer, MOGAI, QUILTBAG, etc.

Only 28% of respondents felt that LGBT[…]+ variations can be considered complete and sufficient as an umbrella.

When writing LGBT[…]+ variations:

71% of respondents include the letter Q

48.6% include the letter A

41.4% include the letter I (i)

24.4% include the letter P

14.2% include the letter N

When writing LGBT[…]+ variations, the following punctuation are used:

76% of respondents use a plus sign (+)

2.4% use an asterisk (*)

0.4% use a question mark (?)

0.2% use a slash (/)

Regarding the length of LGBT[…]+ variations:

2.9% of respondents use 3 or fewer letters

39.3% use 4 letters

33.3% use 5 letters

15.4% use 6 letters

19.5% use 7 letters

14.1% use 8 or more letters

Survey

Most recent data release

Results tag

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[knowingyalluwontlearnathingsmh]

the reason people have 'aphobe' in their about is because aphobia isnt fucking real and on par with furryphobia

It has begun *intense music and thunderclapping*

Being a furry is a choice. Meaning people can choose to do it. Being asexual is not a choice. Meaning you can not choose to be asexual. Nonetheless reading false equivalencies are my favorite past time. 

[thelastjediscourse]

oh and another useless and unnecessary term: queerplatonic. there’s nothing queer about having a best friend lol

[soacethetic]

Have you considered not mocking other people’s terms just bc you don’t understand them and don’t experience it?

I understand the issue with having queer in the name, hence why most call it a qpp or quasiplatonic relationship.

You aren’t clever or original for mocking them bud. It isn’t even discourse related, anyone of any orientation can be in a qpp, you’re just being a jerk.

[thelastjediscourse]

no but legitimately i don’t understand why you need a label for essentially having a close friendship

that’s. literally what it is. you can just say “this is my best friend”. you might want to add that you’re extremely close or that your friendship is very important to you but it’s so unnecessary to call yourself queerplatonic or whatever. outside of a small community literally no one cares nor does it mean anything.

can we all stop labelling platonic relationships and “platonic attraction” like p l e a s e

[soacethetic]

I’ll address the last part first, bc I do think that’s genuinely a problem. In most lgbt+ circles it’s understood that there is no orientation attached to platonic attraction and that it doesn’t affect how lgbt u r. That person claiming that it can make u a lesbian is laughable, but someone who’s misunderstood these concepts.

The reason the distinction of “platonic attraction” is made at all is purely to provide aid in aromantics figuring out their identity. No one ids as “queerplatonic” either, it’s a relationship type.

Qpp isn’t a pointless or harmful term, and a quasiplatonic partner is not the same as a best friend. It’s a relationship that toes the line between romantic and platonic, “alterous” is the most popular term. It’s not quite romance — there’s often little to no romantic attraction and rarely exclusivity. But it isn’t friendship — it often involves romantic components or a level of intimacy beyond what’s considered of friendship, such as dating, living together, marriage, raising kids etc. Perhaps in a society that doesn’t rank romance, sex, friendship and family in levels of importance, “best friends” wouldn’t come with a million wrong assumptions, but that is not a society we live in, therefore the distinction is needed.

If you think a term is pointless it’s bc it wasn’t made for you, simple as that. I don’t understand some lesbian terms, some don’t understand the necessity of non binary genders, but that doesn’t mean they have no significance.

This argument reeks of hypocrisy to me tbqh. If your only point is “straight cis society doesn’t care” then perhaps the argument isn’t a good one

[knowingyalluwontlearnathingsmh]

“Asexuals aren’t oppressed!”

-Writes a two page paper on why asexuality is not a real identity, completely ignores asexual voices, tells asexual people that they don’t need representation, claims that asexuality breeds internalized homophobia and therefore hates asexual people talking about the sexuality, username is a combination of the words ‘cishet’ ‘hate’ ‘not lgbt’, goes out of their way to harass asexual people minding their own business, tells asexual people that they can’t use the resources of lgbtq+ organizations offered to them despite many organizations acknowledging asexual people as lgbtq+

I mean I don’t claim to speak for all ace people but that to me sounds like good old fashion oppression. 

[discourseful]

“ihatecishets” as a url truly is the ultimate form of ace oppression

[knowingyalluwontlearnathingsmh]

If yours and everyone elses argument can only consist of ‘User sames are not oppression” then please by all means ignore all instances is which these might make a asexual person feel unsafe. But keep up the elitism, it’s cute. 

[discourseful]

cishet hate must truly be frightening for ace people to see

[discoursespy]

This reminds me of that post where someone was like “i hate homophobes” and someone was like “wow so you hate all christians smh” like uuuuh its ur own fault u see the word “cishet” and automatically think “this is about poor little ace me and how im asexual!”

[knowingyalluwontlearnathingsmh]

Sure lets all fucking pretend that the term cishet is not a coded word for aro/ace people used to attack aspec folks at all. The sunken place must be nice.

[discoursespy]

you heard it here folks “cishet” is coded aphobic language. When are you gonna admit you hate the trans people who made that word long before the ace discourse was popular to describe actual tangible oppression and systemic issues that go beyond “boo hoo Everyone wants to feel Included”

[alienaceinvaders]

I love how they completely ignored all the other points in favour of

‘“ihatecishets” as a url truly is the ultimate form of ace oppression‘

Also:

cishet hate must truly be frightening for ace people to see

Yeah, because all aces who are bothered by this must obviously be “cishet”, right? That’s how this works, right?

you heard it here folks “cishet” is coded aphobic language. When are you gonna admit you hate the trans people who made that word long before the ace discourse was popular to describe actual tangible oppression and systemic issues that go beyond “boo hoo Everyone wants to feel Included”

I’m trans, and I can’t trust the term “cishet” anymore because it’s so often used by CIS PEOPLE as a way to distance themselves from their own cis privilege while telling me what I have and haven’t experienced as a direct result of my asexuality.

So many people are called “cishet” when they aren’t by any definition, simply for believing that aces are LGBTQ+.

So stop with the manipulative “you hate trans people” crap.

[asexuality-and-aphobia]

Every time I see people say Aphobia doesn't exist I think back to the time my therapist automatically assumed I had been molested as a child and proceeded to try to 'fix' me' l m a o

I actually used to question myself if whether I had repressed memories of childhood sexual abuse, because I honestly couldn’t figure out why I felt so horrified by the idea of sexual contact. I literally spent years fearing that I had been molested as a child and couldn’t remember it. This is why awareness is so important, from both sides.

[bjtchcourse]

some of yall really think that other people talking about sex oppresses you huh

[drg-aido]

you guys make up thinks that “aces believe” and then you mock those points. it’s so weird.

nobody thinks this

[pastacourse-deactivated20210228]

In light of recent discourse I’ve seen, I’d like to toss in my two cents about the way we talk about and conceptualize aromantic heterosexual men.

There is nothing inherently wrong or disrespectful about being an aromantic heterosexual man. We should not hold aromantic heterosexual men to some lower standard of human decency because we assume they are inherently or automatically disrespectful toward women, or we assume they hold no regard for women. 

It is entirely possible, and should be the expectation in daily life, that all types of men have respect for women. Being romantically attracted to women, desiring a romantic relationship with a woman, or being willing to have a romantic relationship with a woman is NOT any kind of sign of respect for women. There are plenty of people who are romantically attracted to women and do NOT respect them, just as there are plenty of people who are not at all romantically attracted to women and respect the heck out of them! 

It should be the expectation that any type of man you meet will have a basic respect for women and women’s feelings. If he doesn’t have that respect, he’s an asshole, but his romantic/sexual orientation should not be an indicator of whether or not he’s a misogynistic asshole. 

Imagine a young man traumatized by his past abusive relationships with women, and not wanting to be in romantic relationships with women anymore. Or maybe a young man who simply doesn’t like the idea of being trapped and tied down in a long-term, monogamous relationship with one woman. He still communicates respectfully with his female sexual partners and female friends, listens to them when they speak, respects their opinions and requests, makes sure they are also satisfied during sexual encounters, etc. 

Laughing at the idea of arohet men, or assuming right out of the gate that they are misogynistic assholes even in theory, is setting a really low standard for these men when the bar should be so much higher. For all men. It also implies, however slightly or subtlety, that romantic attraction to women is a sign of respect for women. Which could not be further from the truth. Listening to women’s voices, spreading their words, and valuing their experiences are signs of respect for women. And arohet men can easily do that, just as well as any other man. 

[soacethetic]

^^^^

Romantic attraction ≠ respect

Let’s not turn the aro identity into some weird misogynistic frat guy straw man

[alienaceinvaders]

People also need to understand that romantic love... is not the only kind of love.

Do you love your mother, your father, your siblings, your pets?

Is that romantic love?!