spinning out / waiting

c • she/her

[bippus]

Thinking of succumbing to something later

[handsywoman]

[sheisraging]

hi perfect

[pavlmescal]

Endless gifs of Ilya Rozanov 1/∞

[dr-gaytorius]

"I'm looking respectfully" well can you look at me like you're dying of a fever. like you're delirious and it hurts. like you're fighting desperately for your life.

[gnawu]

[liones-s]

one of the biggest things I can advocate for (in academia, but also just in life) is to build credibility with yourself. It’s easy to fall into the habit of thinking of yourself as someone who does things last minute or who struggles to start tasks. people will tell you that you just need to build different habits, but I know for me at least the idea of ‘habit’ is sort of abstract and dehumanizing. Credibility is more like ‘I’ve done this before, so I know I can do it, and more importantly I trust myself to do it’. you set an assignment goal for the day and you meet it, and then you feel stronger setting one the next day. You establish a relationship with yourself that’s built on confidence and trust. That in turn starts to erode the barrier of insecurity and perfectionism and makes it easier to start and finish tasks. reframing the narrative as a process of building credibility makes it easier to celebrate each step and recognize how strong your relationship with yourself can become

[mosfetransgender-deactivated202]

NEVER LET YOURSELF BE STOPPED BY WHAT IT WOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE IF YOU STARTED EARLIER!!!!! THE ONLY TIME WE HAVE IS NOW

[anditslove]

[freshapplecider]

Married women could be stopped from voting under SAVE Act

The act could affect whether married women without passports are able to register to vote.

I don't know what else to say about this because I'm still at a loss for words. This has gone through the House and is moving to the Senate.

[classycookiexo]

THIS

[fluffmugger]

they come for one of us, they come for all of us. Stand the fuck up.

[wecanbepirates]

LMAOOOOO

[arcanegifs]

ARCANE LEAGUE OF LEGENDS: 2x06 - “The Message Hidden Within the Pattern”

[karlathewitch]

Thank you for this beautiful way to rip open my wounds.

[urlocalmusicenthusiast]

Song of the day: Ma Meilleure Ennemie by Stromae

[sitp-recs]

re - your last post, as a writer i find that to be an absurd take. people who write exclusively for validation probably shouldn't. if discovering your work is enjoyed and loved - just privately - is a dealbreaker for you, i think there are probably bigger issues that need to be worked through. the idea that we write fic for free and yet this discussion about "payment" through kudos/comments persists is so backwards and obnoxious.

sorry to tag you on this, obv you have nothing to do with op, but i just wanted to say - as a writer recs are a HUGE deal. to know that you liked something enough to share it with others is the biggest compliment for me personally. thanks for doing what you do.

I’m happy you reached out because this is a really interesting perspective. I definitely see increased messaging around comments = payment that pressures readers into thinking they are required to leave comments, and I agree that there are many layers in this convo that point out to a not-so-healthy relationship with fandom.

I find it hard to join this discussion not being an author myself, because I only have the privileged perspective. Ofc I understand how important feedback can be to boost newcomers and those who don’t feel part of the community. We all deal with insecurity in different ways and it’s hard to navigate a big fandom when you don’t have a group of friends to rely on. In the end the fandom experience is about a sense of belonging and it saddens me to realize that I might be part of the problem since my recs only reach Tumblr and my ao3 comments are far and few in between.

It’s funny because my blog has always targeted other readers: at the beginning I didn’t even tag authors and did not expect them to find or engage with my posts. Over the years the recs became more and more personal, until I realized I was writing them for myself. Sure, they are love letters to the fic and might help more people find them, but at the end of the day this is my little therapy corner where I can let go and babble around to my heart’s content 🙏🏼 I’ve always been proud of this blog and seeing that post gave me mixed feelings about it for the first time, so thank you for your message!

Again, I think this discussion has many layers and I’m a bit wary to get involved being a humble reader, but I’d be curious to see how others feel about it…

[eleadore]

yeah there's a couple things that bother me around this whole discourse

readers seen as second class citizens who don't have a place in this discussion

the conflation of "community" and "attention"

this whole "feeling like i don't belong because i didn't get enough feedback" is the most disingenuous take. fandom has been & always will be THE place to foster community with likeminded people, irrespective of what feedback culture is like. we had lj, now we have discord. before lj we had uhhh forums on ff.net and carrier pigeons. i've found my people over the years in tiny fandoms where i was only a reader engaging with other readers and massive fandoms where i was a writer with one reader who was semi-into the brand of weird i was putting out

i feel that if you find joy in what you're creating you are a lot less likely to be bothered by things like how many people go out of their way to tell you how much they like your stuff. every creator is going to wonder about feedback, it's unavoidable. but if it's causing you to make this longass tumblr post about packig up your bags or worse, driving you to guilt readers for not "doing enough" that's just a you problem

ao3 is an archive & community isn't going to be built on the stats page. if that's where you're looking for it then maybe that's the issue yk

[faiell]

OK so I've been thinking about this all day. Very cool of me right.

I don't think this was anyone's intention, but this post comes off dismissive of people who struggle with stats. Sharing creative works is an incredibly vulnerable act, and different people react to that in different ways. Some people need validation to keep going, whereas other people go the opposite way, and might feel uncomfortable if their works get a lot of attention.

A lot of people don't have the confidence to say: I don't need AO3 comments to keep posting. I don't think we should tell those people - just toughen up, and share art for "better" reasons. True, their life would be easier if they could ascribe to that, but often times it takes a journey to get there, and tbh some people might never even fully make it there.

There's nothing disingenuous about feeling unhappy if nobody looks at something you made, especially if you've gone to the trouble of sharing it. Sometimes you just want to be seen. Sometimes you create and share something not for yourself or for some grander artistic vision, but just to connect with other people, and that's perfectly fine. And also, creating and sharing are two very different things--I feel that if someone shared their work online, it goes unsaid that they wanted people to see it.

In the end, commenting is one of the easiest ways for a reader to show gratitude to a writer. While guilt-tripping is definitely not the best way to go about convincing anyone to do anything, I think commenting culture should be kept alive as much as possible. In the same vein, reccing is just as important, and if a reader recs a writer's fic, the writer should be encouraged to say thank you to the reader.

You could come away from this conversation with the conclusion that both readers and writers don't owe each other anything. Readers are under no obligation to comment or interact with fics: true. Writers are under no obligation to post if they feel they are not getting the feedback they want: also true. But that's pretty bleak, and not a sustainable mindset at all for fandom to thrive. People who are interested in having a healthy, alive community for their fandoms need to embrace the fact that everyone involved can contribute towards it, and the more people who do it, the better.

[eleadore]

hey, at the end of it i think we're on the same page - guilt and obligation don't have a place here. to clarify other points:

i don't think anyone's telling people to toughen up, but even that sentiment bothers me - there's nothing to "toughen up" against here. in this space, lack of attention is not harm.

i can and do acknowledge that there are people who struggle with stats and need validation to keep going. i don't think it's dismissive to say that whatever journey you may be on, making it everyone's problem by suggesting people around you change their behavior to suit is not the best way to go about it. a writer expressing that they struggle with this stuff is completely different from a writer telling readers what they SHOULD be doing to help them with said struggle.

there is nothing disingenuous about wanting to be seen. but when you say you feel you don't belong because you weren't seen enough - yeah that doesn't hold water. what is enough? how are we defining how many comments are enough, how much reader interaction is enough? how are we going from talking about belonging to a community to talking about why x readers out of however many chose not to engage?

you write something, one person engages. is that community? i'd say yeah. for me it is.

[thenightlymirror]

James Baldwin.

[wontonsoupinthemorning-deactiva]

message to all bitches

please survive

[kitchen-light]

“There’s a legend about a Chinese painter who was asked by the emperor to paint a landscape so pristine that the emperor can enter it. He didn’t do a good job, so the emperor was preparing to assassinate him. But because it was his painting, legend goes, he stepped inside and vanished, saving himself. I always loved that little allegory as an artist. Even when it is not enough for others, if it is enough for you, you can live inside it.”

— Ocean Vuong, from an interview with Zoë Hitzig in Prac Crit

[baddingtonbitch]

faceless gay men who run uncategorisable aesthetic blogs are the unsung heroes of this website. they'll log on for an hour and post 10 pictures in a row and it's like

robin williams in issey miyake

melted ps2

dudes frotting in motocross gear

ethel cain

dudes sucking cock on a trailcam

stilettos in mud

brutalist urinal

cyclist with road rash, torn shorts and one ball out

rug being washed in iran

the pope holding light years by kylie minogue