All the memes you could ever want

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Text From Last Night inspired text starters [nsfw and sfw] Part 2

[text]: They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal.

[text]: I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.

[text]: Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.

[text]: That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news.

[text]: [_______] disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since.

[text]: I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.

[text]: NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.

[text]: why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list

[text]: You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it

[text]: It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.

[text]: fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.

[text]: You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!

[text]: Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.

[text]: My vagina is officially offended.

[text]: With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.

[text]: No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(

[text]: For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.

[text]: After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!

[text]: Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.

[text]: If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store

[text]: You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall

[text]: In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME

[text]: What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.

[text]: The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch

[text]: I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.

[text]: We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.

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Lyric inspired starter sentences

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Texts from Last Night inspired text starters [nsfw and sfw]

[text]: I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.

[text]: I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS

[text]: We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out

[text]: I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.

[text]: two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.

[text]: I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass

[text]: Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.

[text]: According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.

[text]: You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party

[text]: I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.

[text]: What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"

[text]: Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.

[text]: YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.

[text]: Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.

[text]: I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.

[text]: I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...

[text]: You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it

[text]: I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool

[text]: I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.

[text]: Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.

[text]: A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.

[text]: OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE

[text]: Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.

[text]: Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him

[text]: I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.

[text]: I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"

[text]: Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.

[text]: I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.

[text]: Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.

[text]: I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.

[text]: When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.

[text]: Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.

[text]: i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?

[text]: That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.

[text]: I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock

[text]: I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night

[text]: Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car

[text]: I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress

[text]: Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?

[text]: Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.

[text]: I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there

[text]: She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?

[text]: We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.

[text]: So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together

[text]: That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.

[text]: I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that

[text]: Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant

[text]: Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night

[text]: I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.

[text]: Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.

[text]: I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.

[text]: How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..

[text]: Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you

[text]: I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family

[text]: You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.

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Send me a ✔ and my muse will send yours a snapchat drawing.

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Send me a '✔' for a Teacher-Student Romance starter. Send a '✖' for a High School Student Romance starter

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Send a '♨' for my muses reaction to yours making them breakfast.

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Send a '⁉' for my character's reaction to yours sitting infront of their home with flowers.

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Send me "✖" for a random starter topic [1-20]

[Mix of nsfw, fluff, angst etc...]

「Our muses are roommates in college meeting each other for the first time.」

「My muse is a vampire, and your muse is their prey of the night.」

「Your muse is interrogating yours for information.」

「Our muses are reincarnated lovers meeting each other after years of trying to find each other.」

「My muse is outside your's front door at midnight bruised and bleeding.」

「My muse finds out yours is actually a crime fighting hero.」

「Your muse tells yours that they love them.」

「My muse is sick and yours is taking care of them.」

「Our muses meet but as their opposite gender.」

「Your muse sleeps with mine because of a dare.」

「Your muse is a celebrity and mine is a fan.」

「Our muses are celebrating their child's first birthday」

「My muse is a drama nerd, and yours is a jock but somehow they've fallen in love.」

「Our muses are the reincarnated forms of Hades and Persephone.」

「Your muse spun the bottle and it stopped facing mine.」

「Our muses are getting married.」

「Your muse is dying in my muses arms.」

「Our muses got into a heated argument and settled it in the bedroom.」

「My muse is your muses child's teacher.」

「Our muses are having/adopting their first child.」

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Hello my lovelies Admin A here.

While I have a few ask memes in store I'm taking requests as well. So don't be shy [:

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Send me a '✖' and a ship name and I'll tell you...

Who was the one to propose: 

Who stressed more over wedding planning:

Who decorated the house:

Who does the cooking:

Who does the cleaning:

Who is more organized:

Who initiates bedroom fun:

Who suggested kids first:

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Send me 'RENT' for a random starter sentence

"How do you measure a year?"

"Let's celebrate"

"How we gonna pay?"

"Where is he? "

"How do you leave the past behind?"

"You broke your word"

"You can stay here for free"

"What'd you forget?"

"Got a light?"

"Would you light my candle?"

"What are you staring at?"

"You look familiar"

"Can you make it?"

"Who is she?"

"Sorry about your friend"

"Is it on the floor?"

"You're staring again"

"Is it true?"

I didn't recognize you without the handcuffs."

"I used to be a junkie"

"I hear Spike Lee's shooting down the street"

"Do you wanna dance?"

"You earned this on the street?"

"Say something, anything."

"I think I know what you mean"

"Where'd you learn to tango?"

"It's hard to do this backwards"

"What do you mean?"

"I should've died three years ago"

"What's the time?"

"I wanna commit a crime"

"Let's go out tonight"

"You wanna play?"

"Let's run away"

"Who do you think you are?"

"Looking for romance?"

"Life is yours to miss"

"Will I lose my dignity?"

"Let's open up a restaurant in Santa Fe"

"Live in my house, I'll be your shelter"

"Who died?"

"Hey mister, she's my sister"

"Excuse me, did I do something wrong?"

"I've been trying, I'm not lying"

"No one's perfect, I've got baggage"

"But I'd die without you."

"You said you'd never speak to him again"

"You're full of shit"

"I'd be happy to die for a taste of what Angel had."

"I can't believe he's gone"

"I can't believe you're going"

"Are you really jealous?"

"You don't want to watch me die"

"I just came to say goodbye love"

"Please don't touch me."

"I'm scared I need to go away"

"No room at the Holiday Inn again"

"I should tell you, I love you"

"I should tell you why I left"

"I have always loved you"

"There's only us"

"Don't freeze your heart"

"Hold on tight"

"That's where you'll find me"

"Don't forget."