Idiotic Nonsense

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Nobody has to care about my thoughts on COVID-19, but maybe someone can relate. I’m sure everybody is so fucking tired of staying inside. Even though I’m not alone it sure seems like it. Feeling isolated. Personally, all of my relationships are falling apart. With my partner, with my friends, and even my family. I have no way out of this until there is a vaccine. I honestly wish the government would lie and tell us there’s a vaccine coming within the next month, not the next year. Then when there actually is a vaccine they just randomly tell us, “Hey, everybody needs this shot.” I don’t even want the vaccine for myself. Other people who want it can have it. I know it’s selfish. But I need to get out of this house and my head. I need other people around me. Not just the people I live with. I want my parents to loosen up and let me see just one friend. One really important friend who’s relationship I want to save. But they won’t let me because that would just be the worst thing. Anyone else have any thoughts on COVID-19?

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Pretend you’re somebody who’s not scared.

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if monsters were real i wish they’d fucking kill me already

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“you say you love the rain, but you open your umbrella

you say you love the sun, but you find a shadow spot

you say you love the wind, but you close your windows

this is why i am afraid, when you say that you love me too.”

•WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE•

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to my best friend

she wrote me a letter once, and here’s one of the things she said:

“I’d hate to see so much potential leave this earth. Don’t leave until you’ve grown old and crippled, please don’t leave until you’ve fully lived your life, please don’t leave. Don’t leave today, or tomorrow or even 30 years from now. Leave when you’ve fulfilled your life.”

through all the shit she’s put me through and that we’ve been through together, she’s probably the reason i’m still alive

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PANTHESIM

a basic belief that doing harm to oneself harms us all; that we’re all interconnected

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I remember the times my dad would come into my room, and give me goodnight kisses while tucking me in so tight. Probably so I couldn’t sneak into the kitchen for candy. He is the man who saved me from my nightmares. I love his tight hugs. You can always tell when he is being heartfelt, because he’s basically emotionless most of the time. Loving and kind even though he looks like a hard ass. He was tough on us. I would probably have abs if he had kept making us do push-ups and sit-ups as punishment. I love my father and how alike I am to him. I favor him. He’s such a dork, and I will always love that he’s a metal head. His personality could never be better.

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If you can’t draw it, it’s not simple. Some people say life is simple. I personally cannot draw it; therefore, it is not simple.

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“Absolute silence leads to sadness. It is the image of death.”

Jean-Jacques Rousseau

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Nothing was your choice from the start. You didn’t choose to be born. What gender you are going to be. Your lifestyle. You didn’t necessarily decide how you grew up. It just happened and was sort of given to you. Leading to the fact that life isn’t really fair. Life doesn’t deserve to be mean. Life is also just a concept in a way. It’s kinda just our imagination. You can’t touch life, but you can feel death. Life is everything we do with our time. Life has never lived itself, so I guess life isn’t to blame either. It doesn’t know what it’s doing to us. Life has an upside down idea of itself. It’s there just to end. It’s the “friend” you want to go away but won’t unless you yourself go away.

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Why is it that blank pages can always be filled with words, but life can’t always be filled with happiness? Happiness isn’t ink and our lives are already full enough I suppose.