OT5 Forever

She/her? | 25

[toneelspeelster]

"he's coming for that c." ilya smiled. "i know."

[leosmiserables]

obsessed with this bookshop in stratford-upon-avon having WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE listed as a ”local author”

[penandinkprincess]

extremely endeared about the idea of shane and ilya babysitting the pike kids and shane getting assigned role of king because he's mostly just interested in sitting and spectating to make sure no one is actually getting hurt and meanwhile ilya is alternatively a dragon/enemy knight/friendly knight/horse depending literally on the second and which kid you ask

which also leads to the very funny moment of the twins bringing their "captive" to king shane for judgement of his crimes and shane not even lowering his sunglasses and going "off with his head"

ilya is just D:< you will not even TRY to argue clemency?? for your HUSBAND???

"sir ruby, what are his crimes?"

"smashing the village and eating ALL the villagers >:D"

"yeah, death for sure" *dismissive hand flick*

[isisisak]

@lavenderprose 's taaaaags

[penandinkprincess]

shane trying to figure out how tf ilya managed to get out of having any tattletaling brought to him, and the answer is that he is Play Companion Shaped and not Authority Figure Right Now Shaped

ilya gets his revenge for his heartless execution by introducing the concept of revolution against a monarch to the children and having a GREAT time watching shane get fucking DRENCHED with waterguns

hayden and jackie get home later to all of them on the floor out COLD in a group nap

[hollanovsgingermelt]

domestic hollanov you're so special to me

[rylandsgrace]

HUDSON WILLIAMS

Laufey - Madwoman (2026)

[reginasphalanges]

The Good Place  3.01 Everything Is Bonzer!

[ahotknife]

the thing is that childhood doesn't just end when you turn 18 or when you turn 21. it's going to end dozens of times over. your childhood pet will die. actors you loved in movies you watched as a kid will die. your grandparents will die, and then your parents will die. it's going to end dozens and dozens of times and all you can do is let it. all you can do is stand in the middle of the grocery store and stare at freezers full of microwave pizza because you've suddenly been seized by the memory of what it felt like to have a pizza party on the last day of school before summer break. which is another ending in and of itself

[clearestbluest]

<3

[shining-bewear]

[saxifraga-x-urbium]

[outlikethat]

The app now collects, among other things, precise location data. https://archive.ph/ZzujE

(source https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cq5yynydvgzo)

Who owns TikTok now and how could it change for US users?

While TikTok's future in the US has been secured, questions remain about exactly what changes US users will see.

[angremlin]

In case you missed the inciting incident, the new TOS specifies that they will try to collect data about your immigration status. Not only would this be evil enough if 'all' it did was correctly report that information, but since it's not like they're gonna ask you or scan your passport what they'll actually be doing is using their shitty algorithms to GUESS who it should report to ICE

[garmentpurist-deactivated202603]

I love getting older. I’m hotter, more confident, more intelligent. Ageism is a dirty trap. Don’t get caught in it.

[malex-i-never-look-away]

[jazzyyy81]

I've known this song since I'm fucking 13 this is a full circle MOMENT FOR ME

[6irlpet]

i dont want a childproofed internet i am almost 30 fucking years old. give your kid an internet safety talk and stop making it the problem of every adult on the planet every time some cryptkeeper legislator gets the brilliant idea (via conservative lobbying) to push through yet another bill gutting our access to free expression + increasing the powers of the surveillance state + lining the pockets of Big Data in the name of Protecting The Kids they wont even feed. this shit is exhausting i can’t believe we’re going to be fighting about it for the rest of my life

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

current state of the internet is a FUCKING EMBARASSMENT. was chatting with my grandma bout the history of crochet and knitting (and the comparative ages of those respective technologies) and i was like "oh YEAH and also that ancient greek fiber art we partly figured out from chemically testing the scoured bleached pigments of stolen statuary (tumblr knows what im talking about)—gimme 30 seconds to look up the name."

5 minutes and 3 search-engines later i am crying tears of blood screaming spitting blubbering in despair as my grandma attempts to digitally pat me consolingly on the back. the library of alexandria didn't burn it was "restructured" to "increase shareholder profits"

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

and i STILL CANNOT FIND THE TERM.

i am scouring the internet like the victorians scoured and destroyed all trace of joy and color from stolen relics for the LOST NAME OF THE ANCIENT PROCESS of textile-creation akin to knitting/crocheting/nålebinding that at least one academic/crafter used to recreate the leggings on this Glorious Motherfucker:

the google execs erased it. they bleached my bestie AGAIN from history...

[lachrymose-lyricist]

is this of any use

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

SO IT IS!!!

Archer statue from the Temple of Aphaia (ca. 480 BC) next to a reconstruction of its original paint job:

The leggings and sleeves would have created using a method called SPRANG which predates knitting and is over 3,000 years old. What's even sexier is modern artisans managed to recreate the entire outfit using the original method!

Mmm-HMM, love me a shapely thigh in harlequin hosiery. Put👏men👏in👏clingy-ass👏clothing👏again👏👏👏

Unfortunately english sources are hard to find, partly because Google's a shithole, but also because this textile project comes from a German museum, in Germany, where people tend to speak (and publish) in German. That said, the original link is to a short-but-sweet article I would have had no problem finding in 30 seconds a mere few years ago. fortunately i have clever beautiful insane people following me, but alas not everyone has such luxury. thanks to everyone in the notes who shoved themselves down this rabbithole with me!

in conclusion let us take a moment to sincerely wish Google a very burn in hell🙏

[dogpuppy]

[animentality]

[oddly-romantic]

able bodied people when you tell them they shouldn’t touch disabled people without asking in the name of “helping”: oh my god wow! i guess i’ll just never help anyone ever again! better yet i’ll just kill myself!

[oddly-romantic]

a comment on a tiktok about how you shouldn’t just move a person in a wheelchair without asking. able bodied people’s egos are so fragile it’s insane

[edgebug]

anyone: hey so you really shouldn't move someone's wheelchair without asking first. it's a bodily autonomy thing and it's just rude

some bitchless chud: oh REALLY? what if there was a FIRE and the person in the wheelchair had PASSED OUT? I should just LEAVE THEM? I should just LET THEM DIE????

anyone:

some bitchless chud: what if it was a DYING CHILD'S make-a-wish to push someone's wheelchair without asking

[teaboot]

Adult ProTip, from a security professional: If a kid tells you, "My parents are gonna kill me / kick my ass / kick me out" for something relatively minor, don't respond with shit like "Really? ;) that sounds a little extreme, don't you think sweetie?" because that shit really does happen.

Instead, respond as though whatever threat they are afraid of is fully valid, and offer whatever you can do to help- ask if they believe they are in danger of being hurt in any way, and work accordingly.

If they're overreacting, they'll usually realize and dial it back, self-correct and begin thinking a bit more rationally.

If they're not overreacting, and the danger is real, then they'll need a level-headed adult in their corner, not another condescending authority figure who doesn't believe them.

[seedysys]

sorry about the light mode but this is important also

[teaboot]

^^^^^ Also, since it wasn’t in the original post:

Some kids who ARE being abused will backpedal too btw, and minimize things. But investigating gives you a chance to assess, and lets THEM know that there are adults who exist, who- even when they’ve done something wrong- still care about their wellbeing more than they care about punishment

[asthedeathoflight]

The best way to become immune to freebirthing anti-medical intervention in childbirth propaganda is to follow a sheep farmer on instagram. I mean this. People will try and tell pregnant women not to go to the hospital because their bodies were built for childbirth and it is difficult to know they are lying. Unless. You have witnessed the epic highs and lows of being a shepherd during lambing season. Ewes are undeniably more built for childbirth than we are. Their hips are less weird and their babies less bulbous. They are living the ideal freebirth scenario. And yet the humans watching over them during lambing season exist in a constant state of anticipating needing to give medical intervention because even a sheep is not designed to give birth so well that human interference is not often necessary. And EVEN WITH humans watching and helping ewes and lambs STILL die. Like, pretty frequently. Sheep have spent a million years giving birth just out in a field completely on their own and they still die constantly under near-perfect conditions.

Humans have spent the past 500,000 years frantically trying to make up for having extremely fragile infants and bodies that make childbirth extremely difficult by leveraging the whole of our intelligence and technology and collaboration towards trying to make pregnancy survivable for both parties. You are not honoring your ancestors by giving birth at home with no medical intervention. The midwife you are idolizing would have wept tears of joy hearing about the vitamin K shot and tears of rage to know women and babies are still dying of the things she spent her life fighting even after we invented the cure.