Soon-To-Be Scientist

“James Ackerman, also known as boy-who-frequently-tags-along-with-Carlos-on-sciencey-expeditions has been studying the corpse of intern Dana, or perhaps her double. Maybe, he’s been doing this because he likes intern Dana more than he probably should. James Ackerman is not allowed near intern Dana anymore.” My name is James Ackerman. I am currently stationed in Night Vale, learning about and observing supernatural phenomenons from some of the best in the country. I'm sorry for offending you, Dana!

[thenightvalehumanpet]

I don’t mind these button-up shirts. They actually feel nice and i look nice in them. Maybe I can sneak into the lab and people think I’m a blow-up thing person

[almostscientist]

You mean a scientist?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Yes but I want to blow stuff up though. And my reading and writing is getting better! And i like learning about science too!

[almostscientist]

Oh, man. I could teach you so much about a chemistry and biology And astronomy. Where do you want to start?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Where I can blow up stuff! That’s what!

[almostscientist]

Chemistry. You’ll definitely like chemistry.

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Alright. When can we start?

[almostscientist]

As soon as you understand the basics of science

[thenightvalehumanpet]

But I want to start now.

[almostscientist]

I have to teach you other stuff first.

[thenightvalehumanpet]

I don’t mind these button-up shirts. They actually feel nice and i look nice in them. Maybe I can sneak into the lab and people think I’m a blow-up thing person

[almostscientist]

You mean a scientist?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Yes but I want to blow stuff up though. And my reading and writing is getting better! And i like learning about science too!

[almostscientist]

Oh, man. I could teach you so much about a chemistry and biology And astronomy. Where do you want to start?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Where I can blow up stuff! That’s what!

[almostscientist]

Chemistry. You’ll definitely like chemistry.

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Alright. When can we start?

[almostscientist]

As soon as you understand the basics of science

[thenightvalehumanpet]

But I want to start now.

[almostscientist]

I have to teach you other stuff first.

[thenightvalehumanpet]

I don’t mind these button-up shirts. They actually feel nice and i look nice in them. Maybe I can sneak into the lab and people think I’m a blow-up thing person

[almostscientist]

You mean a scientist?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Yes but I want to blow stuff up though. And my reading and writing is getting better! And i like learning about science too!

[almostscientist]

Oh, man. I could teach you so much about a chemistry and biology And astronomy. Where do you want to start?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Where I can blow up stuff! That’s what!

[almostscientist]

Chemistry. You’ll definitely like chemistry.

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Alright. When can we start?

[almostscientist]

As soon as you understand the basics of science

[thenightvalehumanpet]

I don’t mind these button-up shirts. They actually feel nice and i look nice in them. Maybe I can sneak into the lab and people think I’m a blow-up thing person

[almostscientist]

You mean a scientist?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Yes but I want to blow stuff up though. And my reading and writing is getting better! And i like learning about science too!

[almostscientist]

Oh, man. I could teach you so much about a chemistry and biology And astronomy. Where do you want to start?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Where I can blow up stuff! That’s what!

[almostscientist]

Chemistry. You'll definitely like chemistry.

[thenightvalehumanpet]

I don’t mind these button-up shirts. They actually feel nice and i look nice in them. Maybe I can sneak into the lab and people think I’m a blow-up thing person

[almostscientist]

You mean a scientist?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

Yes but I want to blow stuff up though. And my reading and writing is getting better! And i like learning about science too!

[almostscientist]

Oh, man. I could teach you so much about a chemistry and biology And astronomy. Where do you want to start?

[thenightvalehumanpet]

I don’t mind these button-up shirts. They actually feel nice and i look nice in them. Maybe I can sneak into the lab and people think I’m a blow-up thing person

[almostscientist]

You mean a scientist?

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Everything is purple.

[almostscientist]

That’s a good idea. What did you even put in the solution?

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Not sure. I was a bit drunk when I made it.

[almostscientist]

Are you serious? You're no longer allowed to drink.

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Everything is purple.

[almostscientist]

You know, that could be a problem. You might want to look into that.

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

I’ll see what Carlos has to say about them.

[almostscientist]

That's a good idea. What did you even put in the solution?

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Everything is purple.

[almostscientist]

No, your Irises are not violet. Actually, they’re a very electric blue.

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Strange. I’m sure they were once green. It’s alright though. 

[almostscientist]

You know, that could be a problem. You might want to look into that.

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Everything is purple.

[almostscientist]

Except for all of the times I tell you an experiment is going to fail, and you don’t believe me. You’re lucky it didn’t turn your Iris violet.

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

It’s not violet is it. What color are my eyes? [He leans in very closely.]

[almostscientist]

No, your Irises are not violet. Actually, they're a very electric blue.

[almostscientist]

[almostscientist]

It had been a very long time since James had felt so close to someone, physically and figuratively. James pressed against Don, while Don held him in place. He could feel his partner’s breath against his next, the rise and fall of his partner’s chest, the warmth of his...

[almostscientist]

"How dare you leave your mother alone while dinosaurs walked the Earth!" He teased, "You must have left for college in the Jurassic Era, if my math is correct. That poor woman!" He laughed at his own joke, his expression settling into a wide grin. James propped himself onto his forearms to watch for Don's reaction. His joke was cliché and overused, but it was a good joke nonetheless. James would not rest until he teased Don about his age. Teasing Don had become James' job, after all.

However, there seemed to be a new sheriff in town when it came to making Don's life difficult. James could already tell that Lord Frederick would be a handful. At least he seemed like a good, obedient cat. Owning a pet was always a strange concept to James. One would bring an animal into their home, keep it captive, and both involved parties would just accept it. James was about to voice his opinion on the topic when Don removed LD from his chest.

Time seemed to stand still James and Don's lips pressed together, moved against each other. Butterflies raced in the scientist's stomach, and he could feel his body growing hot. A soft gasp escaped his lips as he felt warm hard travel under his shirt and across his stomach and chest. He wasn't sure where this would end, but this was sure as hell a good way to start.

The blonde drew in deep breaths, trying to regulate his breathing and heart rate. His entire face flushed at Don's request. His eyes, which had been half-lidded shot open. Mentally, James wasn't ready to go any further than a little necking. His lust seemed to be getting the better of him, though, because part of James wished Don would continue all the way. In response to Don's question, James gave a slight, uncertain nod. "Claim me as your own," he said, a smirk playing on his lips.

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Everything is purple.

[almostscientist]

Did the experiment fail? I told you it would. I don’t understand why you never listen to me.

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Maybe… Because I’m always right… except for this time.

[almostscientist]

Except for all of the times I tell you an experiment is going to fail, and you don't believe me. You're lucky it didn't turn your Iris violet.

[doctor-dubinsky-deactivated2016]

Everything is purple.

At least I think that’s what purple looks like. It was a mistake trying those eyedrops. 

[almostscientist]

Did the experiment fail? I told you it would. I don't understand why you never listen to me.

[almostscientist]

James had promised Dana days ago that he’d take her out bowling. However, something had always come up, and he was never able to make the time. Tonight, however, was different. Tonight, he was determined to take her out on this, dare he say it, date. There was no use moping...

[almostscientist]

James blushed, giving Dana a once-over. He had fucked up. He was a day late, and there was no way Dana would go bowling with him at this hour, but it was the only time he could get off. He felt guilty for standing her up, which is why he had the flowers with him. So long as they didn't eat Dana in her sleep, he should be forgiven. That was how girls worked, right? Boys were supposed to buy girls flowers when they were in trouble, right? James had had girlfriends before, but he could never quite understand them. Females wee foreign, complex animals that had yet to be domesticated.

James shifted his weight from one foot to the other, fixing his eyes on the ground. "No," he said, "don't be sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so late. Gosh..." He lifted his head to meet her gaze, "I'd be honored if you would still go bowling with me, so we can bowl and examine the city in the pin-retrieval area of lane fun. Dana, I want to go on an adventure with you."

[almostscientist]

[almostscientist]

James immediately threw his arms around Don’s neck when the other pulled him close, wanting nothing more in that moment than to be pressed against… His boyfriend. Yes, James supposed that was what Don was to him now. He couldn’t think of a more satisfying title for one Mr....

[almostscientist]

It had been a very long time since James had felt so close to someone, physically and figuratively. James pressed against Don, while Don held him in place. He could feel his partner's breath against his next, the rise and fall of his partner's chest, the warmth of his partner's body. This moment felt as if it were fixed in time, as if everything in James' life so far was leading up to this.

James sighed in contentment as their legs tangled together. He didn't care what they did together. James could fall asleep like this and he'd be happy so long as they stayed close. He only wanted to feel Don against him. He needed the confirmation that everything would be okay. He needed to know that Don would never allow something so stupid to come between them.

James opened his mouth to speak when a small kitten forced its way between him and Don. James had meant to ask about the kitten. He hasn't thought Don the type to keep pets or take in a stray. Animals are dirty, after all. James tried to resist loving the cat, but he immediately held it close to him, scratching under its neck and behind its ears.

"Since when do you like animals?" He asked, a soft smile playing on his lips, "I didn't see you as the type to care for anything that couldn't make your wallet fatter."

[mind-travel-er]

Well… I’m not the girl there, who was able to take a picture with him, get his autograph… and actually be near him. No worry. Just… I’ll just… keep my calm. …

[alicetheintern]

I don’t.. understand…

Hey, um, are we going somewhere? Wait, where are we? James?

[almostscientist]

yeah, I'm juts taking you to the lab. It's no big deal.